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Original poster

Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone (pt 17)

993 replies

Remotew · 18/01/2010 18:03

Has no-one beaten me to it yet?

Juicy sounding good.

WG old friend is worth seeing again.

Second not to arrange a meet up without me. Maybe down south in May.

OP posts:
Monty100 · 02/02/2010 22:49

Juice - Hear Hear!!

Ninah - yes, I got it. lol

DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE · 02/02/2010 22:50

oh hi monty. missed your post... not sen you in ages!!

still waiting on forces dudes rota being confirmed. his dates need to match mine. i have ds birthday in few weeks. exam paper due middle feb, and a girls night, and tickets for concert. there's only 2 wkds that i can do in the time before he's back here.

Monty100 · 02/02/2010 22:54

Blimey Juice - you're always so busy, don't know where you get the energy . I hope it happens anyway, sounds good.

hatesponge · 02/02/2010 23:05

juice - I can see the theory of what you're saying. but the man from saturday did text me that night, post date. I just havent heard from him since. And now apparently am not likely to.

Well, thats it. I'm done. Cant be bothered with it anymore. Shame I cant sign whats left of my match membership over to anyone!

spicemonster · 03/02/2010 07:58

Thanks for advice ASBM and hatesponge - I don't know how long ago he and his wife split up but I know they're divorced and he's moved here and she is still in the US. We shall meet for a drink and see how it goes. I suspect he's trying to find someone to fill her shoes asap and I'm not entirely sure what I'm looking for but he's worth meeting for a drink at the least I reckon.

hatesponge - I hate it when that happens and it's happened to me more times than I'd care to remember

I guess sometimes people just change their minds but it doesn't make it any easier I know. Juice speaks sense. If it makes you feel any better I was talking to 2 of my male friends last night about their failed dating attempts so it's not just men who muck women around.

thesouthsbelle · 03/02/2010 08:00

LMAO! no girls calm down put your hats away, he has not proposed and won't be any time soon. the random off the cuff thing is a private joke we seem to have going on atm. I prob won't explain it well, and to other people it seems to be weird & odd lol. but well it's the way we say 'andy murray's name to each other' sort of an aaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnddeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmuurrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee' bit odd, but he won in the tennis set we'd just been talking about so he left me a voice mail (never done) saying go...... it hard me rolled up n smiling at day. (simple things n all that) we were doing it again last night - apparently his brother thinks it's not funny n weird, but I find it hysterical. lol. but we are going to be a couple now (confirmed last night but without the whole ) and do the baby steps thing/both (him) chill out on the whole thinking 20 years down the line. I have one MAJOR sticking point (being match, caught him out on there again a few days ago, he's said he'll not go on there at all now so first sign n i'm off - promise girl promise promise). but no bands. (hell not even divorced yet! lol.

kdk - are we suppose to wait around for them then? (oops lol.) anyhow mr darcy is already ear marked as my alternate if tom ward or david tennant doesn't knock on my door!

hate - sounds to me like he's either really busy, really rude, testing the waters re a date, or had a few first dates set up as it were - either way he's rude as it is rude to do that n have at least a no thanks text. Do agree with juicy t a point thou, those who are interested will contact you shortly (sailor was within an hour, and gymboy was about 20 minutes lol)

eve/monty/blondie hope you all have good days.

oh hate - why don't you just pick some totally random people from anywhere to be 'pen pals' with will use the rest of the subscription up.

thesouthsbelle · 03/02/2010 08:00

oh I say that's a bit long lol.

thesouthsbelle · 03/02/2010 08:03

(oh and also said that I wouldn't under any circs do this again - ie last chance saloon matey - and next time i'll walk not look back change my numbers emails the works)

DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE · 03/02/2010 08:22

hate - dont jack it all in just because of that.not saying start looking straight away. but it fills a boring evening to nosey through the profile at least.

hate - what did the message say he sent after date? was it just to thank you for a good date.... which is good manners. but isn't an actual guarantee of another date. or was he saying he had a good night. and asking if he could see you again... or looking forward to see you again??

Original poster
Remotew · 03/02/2010 08:42

I haven't had chance to catch up yet but will say that then there is the guy who constantly calls, texts, wants to meet up the next night and declare love straight away. Don't like those sort either. As a couple of months down the line they realise they 'cannot do this'. It's happened to me a few times.

I want a happy medium. Thought I might have found that with Salesman but he seems to have bfs.

OP posts:
kdk · 03/02/2010 09:48

@ spice - was this guy off POF - just asking because I had a couple of messages from a bloke off there who seemed to have, shall we say, issues about and around his ex ...

@ juicy - not saying I don't agree with you in some respects - may be a London thing ie more women/less available men - or age as in I'm over 40 and not looking for a toyboy - plus will admit I'm fcking fussy as to what I will even consider - not so much in terms of looks though that matters, but in terms of apparent intelligence/humour/weirdness - just don't have the time/inclination to bother going out with blokes that I know* I'll have nothing in common with.

Also always been a believer in the carpe diem principle and sometimes just going for what you want.

And also agree with eve - had guys that messaged me just a bit too persistently and find that off-putting as well ...

ain't no pleasing some

spicemonster · 03/02/2010 09:53

Oh God yes he is kdk! He's called John - is it the same bloke? I'm supposed to be meeting him tomorrow night but I can always cancel ...

I'm so rubbish at this kind of thing but figured a quick drink wouldn't hurt. I ditched the last bloke I was supposed to go out with before we actually met because he texted and called and emailed constantly. Did my head in

kdk · 03/02/2010 10:14

Hold your horses Spice - let me go and check - no, you're okay - the guy I got messages from was called James.

Go forth and enjoy!

spicemonster · 03/02/2010 10:19

Phew Also if you're on POF, avoid a man called Bob. Who was the man who bombarded me with missives.

Why is it so hard to get it right? Either too much in your face or apparently disinterested. Shouldn't be that hard should it?

aseriouslyblondemoment · 03/02/2010 10:52

PMSL @ juicy
well said girl
and yes some blokes will say anything to you bar the truth as they don't wish to appear mean
what i will say tho is sometimes it is good to look beyond what you perceive as being compatable ie hobbies/interests
imo it's great to meet someone who actually has something that they actively pursue and are passionate about it as opposed to some nolife type,even if the particular interest doesn't especially engage you
what is important imo is whether you have a shared view of life,same values,soh etc etc
kdk this is not me having a dig at you here btw
but i honestly feel by being picky(your words)you're actually missing out on the chance to meet some really nice blokes

aseriouslyblondemoment · 03/02/2010 10:55

spice hope you have a nice child free evening!

Original poster
Remotew · 03/02/2010 10:57

glad it's not the same guy.

The only time we've had a crossed guy on this thread was Juice and I once. He was quite a cute toyboy (for me) from Scotland. I did chat to him online and cam but drew the line at arranging a meeting as he was far too young but wanted to meet someone older. I'm not that desperate. Anyway no harm done on that one.

It's going to happen if a couple of people are on the same site and the same area.

OP posts:
aseriouslyblondemoment · 03/02/2010 11:07

oh yeah i remember him eve
BUT you can't beat janos and i who were IM'ing the same bloke whilst we were both cackling chatting together on msn

DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE · 03/02/2010 11:09

i'm with asbm on this. it's good to have shared interest. but i like a fella to have interests seperate to mine.

i'm not the type of person who wants to be in a couple where you live in each others pockets. same shared interests is no good for me.

it's a good thing to me if they have hobbies and interests which dont appeal to me.. and may even seem odd to me.... as it keeps them off doing something when i want to see girls or do my own hobbies.

spicemonster · 03/02/2010 11:15

A friend and I are both on OKCupid and she's just been seeing a man I rejected and the last man I went on a date with was one she'd rejected

As long as you don't find you're Tuesdays date and your friend is Wednesday's I don't think there's a problem. It's quite fun swapping opinions

aseriouslyblondemoment · 03/02/2010 11:19

tho it has to be said juicy that i think we'd have to draw the line at morris dancing wouldn't we?

aseriouslyblondemoment · 03/02/2010 11:21

are you going to give this fella a go then spice?

sincitylover · 03/02/2010 11:21

hi all just popping in as work very busy and dcs seem very demanding at the moment.

Sort of feel a bit like Eve that if someone is really interested it will flow naturally and it won't cause angst. I've become rather cynical and jaded philosophical about stuff now but do remember at the beginning of going online I was alot more ansty and questioning and analysing everything.

I also did some things at the beginning I wouldn't even consider doing now - which makes me think I have got my act together more now - they include some steamy chat, exchanging some risque photos and meeting one guy for a bit of fun [blush}. I can't deny that I got a buzz out of it all. And if the guy I met had lived nearer (it took us months to finally make a date due to our various committments)I would have like to have made that a regular thing.

I think it was a stage I needed to go through but can't imagine doing it now.

Belle - perhaps I am not reading it properly but I feel quite confused about the situation between you and gymboy - is he saying that you are now in a serious relationship - can't understand why he needs to make a big issue over it surely these things develop naturally? Not a criticism just an observation.

Eve re the gardener - think its the other way around - he seems to be getting his hopes up - he text me last night to ask if I had forgotten him - I dunno I'm not really free to see him till early March and he is prob a nice guy but not enough ooomph!

DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE · 03/02/2010 11:21

asbm - nope... i wouldn't mind morris dancing.

DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE · 03/02/2010 11:24

scl - you do remember these slow burners who you dont think will be any good are always the ones which turn into a relationship

i vote for giving the gardener a date.

go on........ quick drink. i have a good feeling about this one. he seems kinda sweet.