Where have all the fit and interesting men gone part 12a

[lou33]

seeing as there has been discussion about using 13

(not that it bothers me)

i feel sorry for myself my back is still playing up, and i just tripped and made it hurt in the usual lower back place

go on the other date

as you can see i am back
hungry and tired

had a nice time

Hi all heard absolutely nothing - I agree ASBM it's extremely rude and disrespectful. I will not be contacting him anymore so may never find out what the score is. It's my pride that is hurt more than anything else.

Even if he is depressed no excuse. We had even arranged where to go. Perhaps he was pissed off with me never having much money though when I could I paid my way.

Ah well a shit end to a shit week.

scl think you're handling this extremely well tbh as i'd be livid
he's not only downright rude but an extreme coward
will you reply if he eventually gets in touch?
betty 1st fella should already have made 2nd date imo so it's fine to meet up with the other one
lou am glad you had a lovely evening..how did exh get on with being a proper dad the kids?

I am angry with him but he hasn't responded to my calls or texts not sure what else I can do.

The thing is although I liked him and he could be a real sweetie (can't believe I just said that) and we seemed a good match there were a few things I wasn't entirely comfortable with namely being so absorbed with work and its connected problems, his family situation seemed slightly odd, not being keen to meet the dcs, minor probs in the bedroom and tbh he could not compete with exbf.

I often gave him a quizzical look and I think it unnerved him. Hadn't met anyone with a similar personality before.

So I think it's for the best really because I kept sort of saying to him throughout - I can't give you what you are looking for (where on earth did I learn that line .

Wow that was rather long.

scl sorry to hear u've had a shit week, I hope it gets better. He sounds like a coward and rude like others have said.

Lou glad u had a good weekend, look forward to hearing about it when u get some rest

asbm thanks since my last post 1st guy has mentioned about 2nd date but we havent arranged it yet, so we'll see

didn't explain myself very well - what I meant about his family situation was that he had fallen out with some of his family but wouldn't tell me why, also he didn't seem to know why his last relationship had ended (she ended it).

I found all that a bit odd tbh

he was fine with the kids, he is going to have them overnight again around bonfire weekend, and lb is going to spend the night here

not much to tell about last night

we forgot to eat tho

lou is his thai gf in the UK or still in Thailand?

in thailand, he cant even get her over for a holiday he said

lol

betty unless he's actually set a firm date i would def see option 2 as well
nothing wrong with that!
scl hmm those things would make me rather concerned too,have you found anyone interesting on pof since?
that's sounding good lou and i'm imagining that at it's bonfire w/e sausage casserole will be on the menu

slc - agreed, it's v bad manners on his part, but I think you're already moving on from it? sorry your pride is hurt thou - that seems to be the hardest bit - but remember you were too much woman for him!

any more you like the look of in the shop windows?

Lou - glad you had a nice w.e & that the X is finally starting to step up.

betty - I also think dating a no 2 is a def go as well if no firm no 2 date has been set yet.

nothing from XH this end - but I guess he's still trying to get back with OW who seems to have kicked him into touch find it highly amusing. heard from gymboy this am, agreed to go to the pics on tues with him, my choice of film but have promised no girlie sad ones or war types. Am thinking Halloween 2 - anyone know if it's any good? Aside from that said yet again would speak to him after friend has gone i'm now 100% on my decision. i'm not going to look for anyone else, but am only going to think of him now as a friend and as such will keep contact & calls etc as I would for a friend. (which tbh for me is prob once or twice a week for a text and less for a call unless they're a v good friend) If from here he wants more than fine, (and I choose to) but he can do the chasin. think that's fair enough - I have been considerate!

no-one in particular on the site takes my fancy at the moment, Ive received a few emails but haven't replied to any yet.

There are still some people there from last time around.

Do you think you can handle the new set-up with gymboy SB?

it's my choice sin - it's what i've been thinking about this weekend. (by friends i'm meaning, do the pics, but no stopping over no kissing no hugging etc etc.) friends, if he wants anything other than that that's not going to be a friends with benefits set up i'll consider it but won't be messed about. He's had about 10 more chances than any other bloke has. The fact I think he's an amazing person isn't coming into it tbh. have to protect myself from being hurt again.

we met up for a walk
he agreed to have dc while I do college anyway
he admits he has reservations about a relationship and is going to think it over and decide once and for all what he wants
he will let me know tomorrow
if he can get over his doubts I know I def want him
I'm rather afraid he can't though
At least it's out in the open

how long have you been together ninah?

Omg ninah so much at stake and you have to wait til tomorrow - I would hate that.

Hope it works out for you.

you're not wrong, I'm bloody loathing it
but it beats the incessant dithering, and you know when someone is lovely to you but you just know there's a barrier somehow
we have been together a year and a month

and he's still dithering? god really hope it works out how you want it to.

things always work out as they're suppose to even if we don't realise it at the time. (apparently!)

yes it's not looking good is it

he says he loves me and hates having to make such an important decision

well tbh on the thread I started in relationships there was some v positive story's about it all. So I say it's not over until it's over iycwim.

He should know himself by now, but then again this is me assuming, you know what he's like as a person etc and if this is his normal persona as it were. A woman would know but I think men do tend to have the whole 'shit what the hell am I doing type moments' more than we do anyways.

about having a live in relationship, or just one in general?

he was married for yonks and suddenly his wife had an affair, I don't think he has begun to recover. He has been busy bringing up his dc and work etc and hasn't really dealt with it. He has one shortish relatinoship before me.
I have always been clear I wanted the works, and he is v nervous about the commitment. we get along fairly nicely as we are but always at the back of my mind is that he's not sure
he still hasn't divorced his wife, he says he has no feelings for her but is afraid of raking evertying up
he is not a decisive person and is hating being put on the spot
I has expected him to want weeks tbh! why a day, I wonder, it might as well be weeks
I think he's quite happy with things as they are, seperate lives, a bit of companionship etc but it's not enough for me

I don't want to move in together overnight, but I want to know we're in it together iyswim, no barriers
fuck fuck fuck
I've really fucked up this weekend
and getting all stroppy about being asked to dinner, feel bad now, was his ds birthday
feel like a selfish neurotic old moo

totally understand that you want to feel as if you're on the same page as it were and are commited to a future together
do think that he needs to sort out his divorce for everyone's sake as it's not at all helping his dcs for one and i think a fresh start is in order for him
can understand him feeling cautious(but not after all this time tbh.as after all he has a fairly sound idea of what you're about)it's a post-divorce thing i had a major wobble myself as you know
have you a mutual friend who has survived divorce and is now happily living with np?maybe they can talk some sense into him as my dear friend did with me