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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Lone parents

I just don't care anymore, I cannot be bothered

91 replies

CrackerNut · 19/03/2009 20:04

About anything.

I feel so drained of life, like someone tipped me upside down and shook out any hopes and dreams I had and replaced them with everyone elses 'stuff'.

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GossipMonger · 19/03/2009 20:41

'Story like alot of others, single mum, not working, fed up, and tired. '

OK. single mum. children at school. 6 hours per day to fill.

not working. You got a job but didnt stick at it like you were encouraged on here to do so.

fed up. Because you are unfulfilled in life because you are doing nothing all day.

tired. AS above. Exercise. Get a hobby. Go into school and help. They would bite your hand off for you to listen to children read.

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CrackerNut · 19/03/2009 20:42

FGS yes I quit.

Have already said that the job thing isn't an issue at the moment anyway as I already know what I am going to do, it just doesn't start until Sept so I can't do it yet.

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moondog · 19/03/2009 20:42

CN....sigh.
Before you know it you will be on your deathbed wondering why you spent your entire life waiting for someone else to start your life when it was noone's responsibility but yours.

I'm not posting on your threads again.
I don't see the point.
Why do you even post?
You never follow up the advice people give you.

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GossipMonger · 19/03/2009 20:43

Tis true what Emkana said and we all encouraged you to keep going and sort out childcare but you didnt like what we said and ignored it!

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Lulumama · 19/03/2009 20:43

am sorry the job did not work out for you

it seems you are in a downward, negative spiral, which is understandable, but you have to be the one who lifts yourself out of it

baby steps at first, but you will get through it

even doing voluntary work can be fulfilling

there are some school hours jobs around, few and far between perhaps, but you have to perservere which is hard when you feel like nothing is going to ever go right for you again

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emkana · 19/03/2009 20:43

And you've started courses before and quit those within days.

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emkana · 19/03/2009 20:44

Don't wish your life away

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CrackerNut · 19/03/2009 20:45

Ok, look it is fine forget it.

I wasn't complaining about not having a job but you are all obviouasly fixated on that so nevermind.

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Lulumama · 19/03/2009 20:45

are you getting any help for your low mood?

agree that excercise is valuable in releasing endorphins and making oyu feel better

you do have to take responsibility for how you feel to an extent, no-one is going to say sitting at home all day, all week and doing nothing is going to make you feel good and positive and raring to go

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emkana · 19/03/2009 20:45

We are not fixated on the job thing, there have been plenty of other suggestions, like exercising, volunteering, going to the library, planting seeds... there are so many possibilities.

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CrackerNut · 19/03/2009 20:46

What weekend childcare was I going to get then ?

Moondog, thats fine.

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emkana · 19/03/2009 20:46

What would you like us to say?

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Lulumama · 19/03/2009 20:47

but having a job, aswell as giving you money, gives you purpose and direction and a reason to get up and dressed

voluntary work?

feeling like you make a difference and feeling appreciated is a great mood lifter

and then hopefully oyu will start to feel energised again

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GossipMonger · 19/03/2009 20:47

I agree with Moondog.

I think I am tired of the whole spiral of your negativity about yourself and your life.

If you wanted to do something you could.

The fact is that you dont want to really do aanything about it or you would have done by now.

I have given you a whole list of things that you could do but nothing is ever good enough. Do you want your dds to follow in your footsteps of moaning day in and day out? sitting inside all day wondering if anything will ever get better but doing nothing to help yourself? If you cannot do something to improve your life for yourself then do something for your daughters.

will stop posting on this now as I am sure I am winding you up.

Try and have a nice life.

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Mutt · 19/03/2009 20:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lulumama · 19/03/2009 20:48

agree weekedn childcare is a big problem

but there are weekday jobs to be had

if one thing does not work out, you have to find another way or another thing to do

but i agree when you are alone and tired and demotivated it is so hard

however, you have to pick yourself up and start somewhere

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CrackerNut · 19/03/2009 20:50

I didn't say that I wasn't looking for another job but you all seem to assume that I am doing nothing about anything, when I am.

Anyway, sorry I posted now, am obviously no longer welcome.

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Lulumama · 19/03/2009 20:50

nutty, is this a thread to unload or do you want help or to just vent ?

i think if you did not care, you would not post, but there are no easy , quick fixes

you have to start somewhere.

lifting yuor mood is the first starting point

things will flow from there, but it is up to you to break the cycle

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Lulumama · 19/03/2009 20:51

tell us what you are doing that is positive

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AnybodyHomeMcFly · 19/03/2009 20:51

CN I've not seen your previous posts so can't comment on what you have or haven't done but it sounds like you are a bit depressed to me. Have you been to the GP?

Also I am a married mum and have only one child + one on the way and I know how hard that is even with a supportive husband and family nearby to help out. So three kids on your own sounds like bloody hard work, not surprised you're feeling exhausted.

However re the hopeless feelings do get yourself checked for depression. My sis was like that and got put on the lowest dose of ADs and it totally sorted her out.

Good luck

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PottyCock · 19/03/2009 20:52

Don't be silly.

I haven't read your other threads but it's gobsmackingly clear from this one you need to get out and DO something because you are feeling very low.

There are loads of good suggestions and supportive comments here - don't shoot yourself in the foot. Take the advice - it's good and well meant. At the end of the day you are the only person who can change how things are for you.

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CrackerNut · 19/03/2009 20:53

It was really to vent more than anything Lulu, but I obviously used up my quota.

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PottyCock · 19/03/2009 20:54

Come on, chin up lass - everyone is trying to support you. You need to start being a bit more positive. It's hard when you're feeling bad but little steps at a time and they will soon start to make a difference!

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GossipMonger · 19/03/2009 20:57

What do you actually want out of life, Nutty?

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Lulumama · 19/03/2009 21:18

i don;t think there is a quota, but there comes a point where you can only say, so many times, ' doing X Y Z will make you feel better' and have someone respond ' i can't'

if i were in your shoes, i would do the following:

see my GP for a chat about low mood/esteem and see if perhaps meds would be of benefit.

start doing something positive every day, whether it be going for a walk, joining the library, signing up to volunteer, or for a course, or something !

make sure i was interacting with people, in real life, arrange coffees, playdates, make plans, see family, have people over

make plans, long, medium an short term goals...

do positive affirmations everyday