Tired of it, draining, awful, becoming bitter, i breast fed my children as a single mum, done everything, why cant i get it back, then i watched the most depressing thing on you tube where a single mum drinks vodka all night and then takes an overdos...

[fairyfly]

I am so sick of being alone

What are you doing up so late? Are you ok?

Me too.

Don't suppose you want to do a link, do you?

who's vvv venividivikki (scuse spelling?)
I don't know what a link is, but it sounds as though fairyfly needs some help.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBKrPvjvBLU

Thanks for the link - will watch in a min. My computer seems to take ages for youtube to play anything.

Visited the place that lady was at a few times when xh first left. I could never do it - the kids would have hated me. Are you ok fairyfly?

I would never do that, i'm not ok, i feel as alone as she does but i will not leave my life, or my boys xxx

Have you been on your own long?

fairyfly were here if you need to chat but ii know that people over the internet are only a very small substitute for having someone there for oyu but i hope it gets better for you xx

I have always been alone with my boys.

I remember being so so so tired and breast feeding my babies alone.

But i always thought i could beat it

Yes, that is a depressing video

Oh it's horrid, then i watched this

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfCOnkMiSNg

I wish I could say something but everything is too cliched.

Is that one even worse?

I was reading your message this morning about a list of things to do, which sounded more positive. It sounds like you are swinging wildly from determination to despondency. If you and your xbf split very recently, this is not unusual but it is a horrible place to be.

Oh that made me cry so much dont watch things like this PLEASE it doesnt help,,,

Please don't watch any others, fairyfly. The world is full of horror and sadness. You only need to be coping with your own stuff just now.

Oh that one ended up nice lol i was on the verge of breaking point when i met dp too he cae at just the right time i felt like giving up but im glad i didnt as i wouldnt have the love i do now, As my mum used to say, Chin up love it cant get much worse!

Oh don't worry, i just wish i could get the second

you will but u have to be happy and scure in yourself and your life first then he will come xxxx

princes don;t take two kids on, realised that

mine has

Really?

yes, we met last year on boxing day 2006 3 months after i had ds2 and ds1 was 2 and hes still here muddeling his way through it and trying to become the man he knows i need i wnever believed it would happen when people told me either but i stopped feeling down and started getting sorted and up he turned!

Dont get me wrong its not perfect im not rying to sell a fairytale here hes still immature and im still a depressive bitch but it just works!