Who are the single parents here?

[tammybear]

Was just wondering how many single parents there are on here, apologises for being nosey xx

jmg1 - no more bitter then it sounds like you have the right to be - that sounds really tough for you. I hope you do have a good friend or someone who can support you. and i hope things improve for you and your young family. You must have been very brave to hold things together for them. - not sure i could have been. to the area question raised by another of you - herts.

I am too! Have ds of 7 months. Actually we live in Italy where single mums don't even exist (well as far as I can tell, everyone looks at me soooo disbelieving when I v patiently explain yet again that no am not married).

I moved here after my mum died to be closer to my dad and then he died 2 years ago. Got pregnant shortly after but tho father shows his face now and again he "would prefer not to tell anyone cos it would upset his mum" (that's italian men for you). Have some family around but not especially close to them as grew up in London, so all in all feel a bit bewildered and lost. Luckily the italians LOVE children so ds is welcome wherever he goes,but it is v v coupley here and don't really have many italian mummy friends.

Am def going to buy myself some red knickers...

and in a reverse stuation I am an Italian single mum in London. Have a 2y dd. Loochyloo made me smile when you said that single mums do not exist in Italy although I know at least of a couple. And the italian man too afraid to tell his mum! ARGGHHH!
I am pretty much on my own here as ex husband family dont express interest(is this typical english not to care about a niece/grandaughter?)and ex husband is a psycho. My italian parents died when I was very young and would have no one to go back to. Please do not cry all at once!!

I prefer London anyway, can get work without nepotism, lots of playgrounds, good public transport and a lot more of support from the state agencies than where I am from. You do not appreciate what you have here until you tried to live somewhere else

Although I find it very isolating as I still do not have other mums proper friends

Loochyloo, where in Italy are you?

I am not a single mum per-se, but I do have to cope on my own with five when my DH is working away. It is bloody hard work, and I don't have to worry about where the money is coming from, so all I can say is......

HATS OF TO THE LOT OF YOU!!!! WELL DONE!!!!

Gosh is this thread still going? Have I clocked in yet?!

I am at the moment, Dh has gone to look after his blind and deaf mum while his dad is in hospital. He has only been gone a few days and I know I couldn't do this by myself all the time. I think single parents deserve a medal, it is the hardest job ib the world

I'm in Bergamo (near Milan, Ryanair fly here if anyone fancies a visit...) Barabarax, you're sooo right about not appreciating what you have til you try and live somewhere else. There is no state help here, it's all granny and family. Hardly any nursery places and no child benefit. Oh though my local council gave me 50 free black bins bags as a "welcome to the world ds" present. Unf I can't move back to UK as can't afford it (house prices mutter mutter). Having said that the italians are great about ds in bars/ pizzerias etc and it was 21 degrees today...

it was really warm in London too today, about 19! which it feels like more like a dream

. Loochyloo Wuold you really come back if you could afford it? Private housing is quite expensivein london i agree, I consider myself lucky to live in a council flat. I have read in another thread of people getting 800£ in housing benefit in London, so if you cannot afford the rent, there is some help. I am not an expert on this. Do you have anyone in London at all? TBH I prefer it here and even if i had a supportive family, i could never go back. I am rejecting my roots. shame on me. In italy i wuold never have got the job i have here and my independence. on the other hand at the moment I am truly on my own with my gorgeous dd, and I would love to have a supportive family around for my daughter's sake (she will miss out on that)but i hope that this is just a phase due to my disaster marriage and the change in lifestyle of being a mum.
I am quite new and not too sure about the mumsnet etiquette.. am I being rude? am I diverting the thread?

i'm kind of a single mum! living alone with ds (10mths) not on speaking terms with partner at moment, not quite sure what we are anymore! ever since ds was born! but i adore him (ds that is and have no regrets) not sure how i feel about partner anymore! been a bit of a rough ride, declared myself homeless when ds was 2mths as couldn't afford rent anymore. westminister put me in a hostel in hackney but wangled my way to kilburn, was then offered temporary flat in leyton, which i had to get a solicitor to help me out of and got a temp flat in westbourne park/queens park area at end of november! now have to stay put for 3 years or so to build up enough points (new property bidding system) to get a permanent council flat (but at least i get a say as to where it will be) am alright here, only annoying thing is stairs but summers coming and gona swap by big pushchair for a summer stroller so i'll be super sorted then! had to give up job at hmv cos of childcare probs (was 7pm to midnight) love being with ds but get little lonely for adult company sometimes, all friends still childless and working so not around in day really

Message withdrawn

Me, babyburps, and although I live in Hertfordshire now, I know, Hackney (where I grew up), Leyton (where I lived) and Queens Park (where I worked). You'r enot on your own obviously!

wasn't implying something wrong with hackney and leyton! its just that all my friends and family are in west or west of london, was so worried i was going to be completely isolated. i think thats the worst thing for me, have always been a headstrong, independant person and now being in my financial situation have to relinquish control a certain amount to rely on 'handouts' as they say...sigh

I don't think I would move back to London to be honest. Italy's a great country, I guess it's just my friends I miss but judging by other messages on this thread the feelings of isolation come wherever you live. Are they worse for single parents? A friend of mine (who does have a partner) gave birth a week before me and i have to say I got loads more visits, offers of help (and pressies!) than she did. I got the impression that people were leaving "the new family" alone while they were all too keen to help me out. Thank gawd for great chums eh? So sometimes being a single parent has its advantages. Also I wasn't so scared about asking for help, I knew I had to or go under, whereas I think my friend was a bit shy about asking people to come over and baby sit so she could have a sleep. Has anyone else had the same impression, that people are more ready to help single parents?

well il be the token single dad

er no you won't romantick, jmg1 is as well

well its been awhile since been on here.so hello to the other fellow token single dad on here.

he's an old lag who has been keeping quiet for the last few months

lou33 are you the moderator who can find out who is who.important if you are

who is who? Do you mean check their personal details? Only mnhq can do that, mods can't gain access.

thank god for that [deep sigh of relief emoticon]

although if i got them drunk i might be able to steal their secret passwords, what do you think?

lou33 so anybody working at office tonight who can find out answer to my question that i emailed you.contact my messenger of [email protected]

Clocking in again.

It is difficult if none of your friends have kids... I mean I know no two parent families let alone one parent. Guess that is why I am on MN!

It is amazing to think that somedays I have no adult contact at all and if I do it usually isn't until I see a friend in the evening.

I am trying to keep up with all my young free and single mates but it is tough... yesterday morning I was so tired and I was lying on my bed feeling so weighed down by responsibilty I couldn't move!

Most of the time however I am happy!

Sorry to hear about lack of interest from family from some posters. I know how that is, my exP sees his daughter a lot but his parents have never met her, she is almost a year old.

Know what you mean weesaidie - I don't know anyone near me with kids that I'd count as a friend. One of my best friends who doesn't have kids is really sweet with dd and offers to help if she can but hardly see her because she works all the hours god sends and thinks having 2 dogs is equal to having a baby!! Agree that it must be hell not having any family support - my ex and his family haven't seen dd for about 14 months but at least my mum and dad adore her and I think she's even making my sister want to have kids, which is a real miracle, lol!!!