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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Original poster

I HATE being single

130 replies

nutcracker · 21/12/2006 22:03

Just hate being on my own with no one to give a toss about what sort of day I have had etc etc etc.

I know other single people who were up and about dating straight after their split and yes I know that they probably go out more than once every 3 years and so thats why they meet people but fgs, I just hate it.

OP posts:
ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 22:49

3 years? Wow.Ive only just had my first year.
We all take things at a different speed.I hope it lasts for your friend!

theheadlessreindeer · 22/12/2006 22:54

I've had one unsuitable fling during that past three years. Fun, but unsuitable! I would like to start going out and maybe meet a nice abvailable man. Unfortunately I've got into the habit of meeting friends for lunch or meeting up with our kids. I'm determined to do something more adult in 2007. No I don't mean star in a porn film.

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 22:56

But meeting friends for lunch means you are getting out! It doesn't have to be a night out to meet someone. Could be someone you see in the cafe etc!

theheadlessreindeer · 22/12/2006 23:00

thats true. but i tend to feel more lonely in the evenings, when the kids have gone to bed, and I imagine others socialising or being with their DP. I know thats a rose tinted view though!

VPL · 22/12/2006 23:01

I'm with you there Reindeer. I'm determined to change my life in 2007. I'm going to lose weight, get fit, stop over-indulging and start buying make-up and clothes again. So, in the unlikely event of me getting a social life - I'll be ready!

elliot3 · 22/12/2006 23:05

anyone tried Sarah Beeny's website www.mysinglefriend.com where you nominate friends for dates , I read somwehere she has a lot of success with it

theheadlessreindeer · 22/12/2006 23:06

Shall we go out on the pull VPL? They won't know whats hit 'em Seriously though, sometimes I feel crap about it all, but at the moment I think nope I'm a reasonable looking 41 year old, I deserve to meet someone nice. I'm going to be positive!

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 23:06

I'm going to lose weight and get fit too.
DD2 should be able to go to pre-school in Jan with DD1 so i might join the gym (which is right next to pre-school!).

I don't know about a relationship yet! It would be very hard for DS1.My last xp was violent towards him.

theheadlessreindeer · 22/12/2006 23:10

Tortoise, sorry to hear about what your boy went through how is he doing? It must be very hard to move on after that sort of experience

SnafuOutOfHiding · 22/12/2006 23:10

Here's a Wendy Cope poem I particularly like at this time of year:

At Christmas little children sing and merry bells jingle
The cold winter air makes our hands and faces tingle
And happy families go to church and cheerily they mingle
And the whole business is unbelievable dreadful, if you're single

Sorry to hear you're feeling crappy, nutty. It's early days still. Take comfort in the fact that there are lots of us out there wondering if the right man is ever going to come along - you're not alone! My contact with the opposite sex has been very limited for the last 2.5 years - I can hardly remember what it's like to have a normal, happy, funny, affectionate presence in my life (a grown-up one, I mean ) and sometimes I miss that male 'vibe', for want of a better word! But other times it's a bloody relief not to have to worry about all that, too...

VPL · 22/12/2006 23:10

Never heard of that Elliot. I'll have a look

Reindeer - lol - now that would be something to look forward to. I'll need many months to prepare tho

That's terrible Tortoise. Poor you and poor DS1

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 23:13

He is ok. SS took him and DS2 to live with their Dad until court can decide their residency. Looks like it will be sorted in April.It been over a year already.

VPL · 22/12/2006 23:16

That must be really hard for you tortoise. Is their Dad being reasonable about access etc.?

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 23:22

Solicitor etc help with contact arrangements.I get 2 overnights and saturday so i get quite a bit.
Ive got them tomorrow at 5 until 3pm christmas day. Had to fight for the christmas day though!

VPL · 22/12/2006 23:25

Oh fantastic

I really feel for you there tortoise. I'd take being lonely any day over not having DS living here. What a bastard your last bloke was to cause all these problems.

theheadlessreindeer · 22/12/2006 23:28

I hope you all have a lovely christmas Tortoise xx And all you other singletons out there - plan the pulling night VPL! Off to bed now, catch you all soon

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 23:28

Yeah he was. I have 2 DD's with him so unfortunatly still have to have see him sometimes! He has to have supervised contact though!

VPL · 22/12/2006 23:29

Night reindeer

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 23:29

We will have a good christmas.
Night Theheadlessreindeer.

VPL · 22/12/2006 23:34

Glad you've got that sorted at least and that you've got your girls with you. D'you think you'll get full custody of your boys when your case is heard? I do hope so!

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 23:38

I hope to get residency and their Dad will get contact. Or it could go the other way an am left with contact.Hopefully not! An expert has just been brought in to look and the childrens attachments to each other and me as it was decided they need to see how seperating the DD's from the DS's full time would affect them.Its best to keep siblings together in my mind!

VPL · 22/12/2006 23:40

Absolutely! Hope you get the best possible outcome for you and all your kids.

ISawTortoiseKissingSantaClaus · 22/12/2006 23:42

Thank you.

Original poster
nutcracker · 23/12/2006 10:09

Urgh am feeling so shite today, woke up thinking how nice it would be to have someone there to snuggle up to, kind of set my mood for today and am being a right grumpy cow.

OP posts:
pinkchampagne · 23/12/2006 10:13

Sorry you are feeling sh*t, nutty.
This whole Christmas thing makes it harder doesn't it?
I have been feeling yukky too, but then had vomiting kids to distract me!