40+ Lone parents

[WillIEverBeASizeTen]

I'm 49 and a lone parent (13yo and 20yo) am I in the minority on Mumsnet? It appears alot of the LP's here are a lot younger!

Ninah, I'll "talk" to anyone, regardless of age, just think that there are differences between younger mums and older ones...all good I hasten to add. And being an older LP is much harder I think (energy levels/menopause) however, a lone parent is tough whatever age you are, I would never deny that is a fact:(

Morning MissSizeTen,

I will see your bag of Haribo t'other day and raise you two (full size...) Mars Bars for my brunch today!!!!! Crap night of sleep so massive sugar kick was required. Loved every mouthful too!!!

Hello Ninah - I echo above too - I think sometimes a rant at people in the same situation/age group etc is needed. That and the fact that our mentality is slightly off at times....

Loverly day here, off to the beach for lunch in a minute. Shame my DD3 hates the sand, but it's a nice day so she can lump it .

tbh been an older sm for me means that chance at romance and having another partner seems far fetched
My personal survey (so could be totally wrong) younger divorced or single mums seem to get another shot by the time youngest child is 8 Many manage much earlier but I am too to include them into my survey
By the time dc is 8 I will be an OAP

i will join in i am 41 this year, with 2DC 10 and 13 years old!

argh yet again im to old for one group but to young for yours .

Im almost 38 with ds1 17,ds2 14 and dd age 8 and ds3 age 5 .

im finding i dont seem to fit anywhere the parents at dd school fair few my age but its their oldest kids and ther efaces when they realise i ahve two rather grown up teens not helped as they both look older

Afternoon Ladies,

Boxing well, I don't know although that was certainly applicable to me pretty much first time round - my then youngest was 6, but many many friend who have split in their late 30s/early 40s have remarried and/or had more children. But i'll have to report back for my second foray into this now that I'm 40!!

Medical Hello, I'm 41 this year too with 4 DCs 17, 16, 14 and 2.

And Going, sod it - you can come in here, you're almost there!!! Anyway, you got 4 kids so you may well feel 92 some days! I get the shock faces when people realise that my to oldest DDs are actually mine too! And DD1 who's 17 says she's had some tut-tutting when out with DD3 (2) when ignorant jerks people have assumed that she's the mummy!!

And I seem to be having problems spelling today....

Goingroundthebend -- I have found it hard to connect with parents on both ends of the age range; when DD1 was starting I was one of the youngest and worst turned out mothers (sporting splotches of spitup on a raggy T-shirt will not get you elected Queen of the May outside school) and for DD4 (DC5) I am definitely one of the oldest ones. I tend to socialise with women who have larger families just because we all know where we're coming from and what our lives are like, and we swap children's clothes back and forth, exchange hot tips about sales, etc., but noticed that some definitely drew back a bit when I divorced.

May I join? I am just turned forty with two dc, ds (8) and dd (4). I left having dc relatively late compared to everyone I knew when younger, they all have early teenage children, which I find quite staggering. No assumptons of being grandma here though fortunately, I don't really look my age or so I'm told.

Don't have many friends though apart from these scattered older ones as I live in a big, unfriendly city and it near on impossible to make new friends here.

I think this is it for me, forty now, can't see myself meeting someone else, have been married twice and think that is quite enough. Feel as though I am at a bit of a cross roads though.

I'm going to have to open the wine early today it seems!!!

I hear you totally Math - I was the same, one of, if not the, youngest mothers at school with older DCs and I expect to be one of the older/est ones when DC4 starts in 3 years.

And Shimmery I am the same as you in the friends with teenagers department. My oldest are mid/later teens now as are the majority of my friends so when we move back to London I will have to start over with the small people's parents as I don't know any in my part of London.

I didn't marry again, but it was a marriage without the paper bit really. I don't know whether I'll marry in the future, but I certainly haven't ruled it out. And anyway - We're only 40 - I don't think it's old???

Right, who's for a glass of nice Rioja? Cheers

Can i join?....43 with DD's 16 and 14, and DS 4....i was talking to a mum in the playground the other day, and i'm old enough to be her mother :(

Well i don't know.. I've never been married, am 48 this year, and single as single can be, but i'm not giving up hope! Only thing is the tutu and 'fuck off' boots i had in my head as my wedding outfit, is a bit of a No-No now.

I will admit in times of darkness,i hear the calls of many many cats, and 'badly drawn on' eyebrows from afar, but that could just be my hearing

Hi TWF

Hello TWF at that!!!

And why not Jelly - have you been out in London recently? Or even better - where I live in Spain it's almost uniform....

Hello I am almost 45 with ds 14 and dd 12

All age ranges are fine but I too have felt ancient at times on some threads and that everyone else has enough time to rebuild their lives ie start a career or find a nice man while I am past it.

Thats only on a bad day though mostly I much prefer being an LP to being married to a selfish shit

Having been married twice and co-habited twice I do feel that my relationship energies are totally used up and am quite happy to live alone forever. It takes some getting used to though. I never thought that would be my life. Not that I see it as a bad thing but everyone and I mean every single person I know is shacked up. I am the total odd one out.

But Shimmery you're not on here!!!

Odd one out that is..

No, and it actually feels quite nice .

Yay!

Righto, I ought to bathe my filthy sand encrusted daughter and order gently suggest that as she's two bed may be an idea.

Be back when she gone and I got myself a glass of

just tried to join in weith chat but messed it up!! argh technology.
Will get kids to bed then be back to chat later

I'm 46, have three dcs aged 9, 6 and 5. I feel like a worn out irritable dinosaur .

I've a shiny new man though ...

zoo

thank you

wine oh yes please.goes of to find a straw .Well got to give some memories of my youth .

And yes sometimes with the 4 kids i feel not 92 more 192.

lived together with ds1 and ds2 dad for 7 yeras split up when pregnant with ds2 and was sp for 5 years no contact with their dad met xhubby had dd and ds3 split up when ds3 was one as he could not cope with it .ds3 has sn .
he has had no contact for 2 years now his choice.

as for men ive given up on them and truth dont think i could live with one .House snext door if theres ever a new man be best i think

A lot of them are wankers. Agreed.

I feel 117 today as it happens.

Reminds me of my youth, the straw. We're we friends?

boo TWO mars bars?! that is some sugar fix tis a good job you're dd is not my dd, I can't bear sand either, we'd have to stay by the pool :)

shimmery In RL I'm the odd one out too, sometimes get really down about it, but since I've found this little oasis I've really cheered up :) especially when very generous folk offer alcoholic beverages

Welcome everyone..