The positives of being a single parent...

[RedBlueRed]

I make all my own decisions re life/career/future.
I choose my friends.
I wear what I want.
I can do my exercise video/cross training in the living room without waiting for him to go out or having to put up with comments.
He doesn't come in at 2am pissed and wake me up any more.
I can flirt without shame.
No one undermines my self confidence anymore except me.
I get the whole bed to myself and I can go to bed when I want to.
No-one knees me in the back/stomach if I make that little clicking noise in the back of my throat when I'm asleep.
I don't have anyone to resent anymore for not helping out enough.
I have the joy that is my son ALL TO MYSELF!

Feel free to add to the list...

i can re arrange the furniture..
decorate my room in any colour i like..
switch the tv/comp/dvd on and not find any grubby porn left behind...
cut the grass in straight line...
discipline my dc fairly and consistintly..

I'm a single parent, but now I realise that those positives you mention, apart of flirting without shame, are not exclusive to single parenthood. You can be married and and feel the freedom, honest!

It is about choosing the right person, and to leave in time if you realise he is not.

one look on the relationships thread leaves me in doubt of that orangerie!!

WhiteCherry "cut the grass in straight line..."

Nobody in their right mind is gonna top that!!!!!

he did it all weird....and i like it straight! it wasnt even wonky...just odd.

also..

diy gets done and completed...
the garage remains tidy...
the car is on time for its MOT..
money is left in savings not spent,and gets added to...

orangerie I'm not rating single parenthood over a good healthy partnership/marriage but sometimes when you are on your own all the negatives are so overwhelming, its hard to focus on the positives.

Thats all I was hoping to do.

Cut the grass in a straight line Or not as is my want!

Yes, I can see the positives, actually, I live the positives, leaving my ex was as the Sun shining again. Now I'm in another relationship and I can see how terrible my previous one was.

So don't give up, enjoy the freedom, and when you get tired of it... don't forget there are some decent blokes out there.

I can eat what I want when I want.
I can say sod the housework today.
I can go back to bed with a cup of tea and my book if I want.
I can meet up with friends for lunch when I want.
The best has to be, I can come home from work lock my front door, and think this is all mine!!!

I do have to add that my DS's are a lot older now, 18 & 13 so don't need me as much, however Fridays are a DVD night where we choose a film, get a take away lots of nibbles and have a laugh together.

I had to smile the other day when my eldest had the chance to go out, and he said sorry can't make Friday had a more important thing on, I said go out and enjoy yourself and he said no mum I like our DVD nights!!!

[Warm glow]

Sorry to go off at a Tangent, I have exactly the opposite problem. My 17 year old simply doesn't go out and I'm worried he's missing out on developing his social skills around his peers. I hope he descides to go to Uni (away from home) it'll be so good for him.

-knowing where everything in the house is

-all the free time not spent doing the emotional work of being in a relationship

-one night stands

-always having the remote

-no sky sports news

-painting the house pink and purple

-not waiting up at night

-getting romantic/sexy texts

-knowing exactly how much money I have

Not finding much yet but its only 6 weeks since he died.

reading this thread is good though,am hoping will be able to post my positives soon.

i will save this thread and return at a later date

I can have a Barbie pink bedspread
I can serve up dinner when I feel like it, and not wash up until I feel like it.
If the milk gets left out, I only have myself to blame, meaning it doesn't feel like such a chore to fetch more.
No more stinking foetid socks.
I know whether or not a bill has been paid, and won't prioritise internet over council tax.
The children know where they stand and what is acceptable behavior.
Although I am now in a relationship, I am in it because I want to be and not because I feel trapped.
No pressure to spend my savings on an "essential" flat screen Tv, or speakers for the playstation

What orangerie said.

But happy for you all the same. Make sure you keep hold of all of it when/if you choose to meet someone new.

Apart from the having the bed to yourself thing, taht could be tricky after a while!

GazzasDG I am so sorry.

GazzasDG so sorry.

Whiteandnerdy don't worry my eldest rarely goes out tbh, unless it's to go fly fishing!!

even in a decent relationship there are necessarily areas where you need to compromise
I love running my life without having to consider another adult

OOH found one.I can sit in bed listening to Tori Amos, mumsnetting and eating pizza in pjs without anyone knowing i'm a total slob

well,except you lot,

Gazza very sorry for your loss. Love your positive and the fact that you came back the same day.

Also agree with foreverastudent - knowing where everything in the house is.

Whatif, I love that your 18 yr old chooses dvd night with you.

Colditz I'm with you on the socks!

Orangerie my love you have missed my point completely! I am pleased that you are all warm and fuzzy about your relationship and want to share it with everyone but I promise you, I'm not in need of a pep talk.

being able to have a dismantled car in my bedroom...and i'm not even joking - tho the novelty of that little freedom is wearing thin - really need to get it put back together!

Bloody hell.Really?

What kind of car?How did you get it in the bedroom in the first place?

James don't do what one of my friends did, brought a classic bike, in bits I may add. He put it back together in his spare bedroom, as it was "way too cold to do it in the garage".
Bless him I didn't have the heart to tell him not to put it together entirely, funny watching him trying to get it out of the bedroom.

arghhh!!

never thought someone would actually read that
dont have the bodyshell in there obviously...now if only i lived in the tardis ...anyway - its a sunburst red xr2, the shell is at work where i'm welding it back together - still - all the rest of it is in piled up in my bedroom - tho thats only since my last gf dumped me honest.