Possible relocation to SF.

[MyBeautifulRaven]

Any advice from US base MNetters, particularly West Coast.

I've had an approach from a tech company - $380k base with a very attractive equity package. It would mean a relocation to the Bay area, which is what gives me pause. I'm very happy with my life here, our children are in the process of fledging so it feels like an odd time to relocate. On the other hand, it feels like an incredible opportunity, especially at my age. DH works for a US company already, albeit in a remote role, but it means his hours would align nicely so no problem there.

Ugh, any thoughts?

HOWEVER - no harm first isn't easy or clear.

Ethics is mucky and no harm is not clean.

Your husband's salary doesn't change so really before working out whether this is actually a pay rise you need to work out

• net salary
• less cost of living difference (factoring in keeping a house running in UK too)
• less cost of frequent flights for you and your DC

Of course, it might not be a purely or even primarily financial move , but either way it's worth knowing what the actual real financial gain (or loss) is before being won over by headline numbers

Yes, thanks @Whyarentyoureadyyet that feels substantive.

And $380k.isnt going to lead her to be homeless..

I'm not going to add to the unhoused burden in the Bay area,

No but it can make places quite unpleasant to live in

100% do it

Yes - I think I will!!

I think to turn it down would be a fuck-off to myself. No, I want to do it, so badly.

It feels like a;

'Hello Raven'.

From the world.

Such a good company too. I am obviously going to accept.

Yes. Yes - I'd be mad not to.

If you change your mind, I shall be Very Cross!

Indeed. I have no idea what you're talking about!

Go Raven! Happy to get to the end of the thread and you've done a 360 flip to the right decision in my opinion!

can your dh not stay behind for a while to support your young adults and travel then out to you frequently? I wouldn’t want a cliff edge of support for my kids, even if they’re young adults. Sounds like a fab opportunity though!

Ha! And I love that!

Yes - I think I needed the conversation.

Yes. I was just thinking that your children’s views and situation/general ability to cope (or not) would make a huge difference here. Congratulations on the offer, it sounds like an amazing opportunity.

Thank you to all contributors. I needed that conversation - and it was genuinely helpful.

I am taking the offer if you were wondering.

Is there any way you could do the job from the UK? It might be worth asking...

Either way, sounds like an exciting opportunity. If I was as excited about something as you are about this, I can't imagine not doing it

Congrats - great decision! You earned this, feel very proud of yourself.

There are quite a few of us here or hereabouts who have made the move and can tell the tales. Don’t hesitate to reach out.

I may well do that!

I live about 90 minutes east of SF. My younger son lives and works in Napa. The Bay Area is a great place to live if you have the income for it. And you would. You'll find some great areas within the BART system if you don't want to do the daily drive. But if you're going to be working for big tech, chances are you won't be working in downtown SF.

For your culinary child, there are 2 campuses of the CIA in the Napa Valley. One in St Helena and one in Napa.

https://www.ciachef.edu/cia-campuses/

And of course for your physics child there is Stanford, UC Berkeley, UC Davis, USF and many other outstanding universities with highly rated physics departments.

As far as SF 'proper' having a homeless problem, so does London. So do most major cities. I've never had a problem with a homeless person. I show them respect by not staring or making a cat's bum mouth as I pass by. They in turn may ask me if I have any change but leave me in peace if I say no.

Go for it, I say! I've lived in California my whole life from So Cal to No Cal and I'd never seriously want to live anywhere else. Skiing in the morning, surfing in the afternoon. Who could ask for more?

Thank you @AcrossthePond55 - sound info. Genuine thanks. x