Is there still a German Thread?

[BeatrixBurgund]

We've moved back to Germany after 8 years in Switzerland and Scotland, and with the kids in school, I just know I'm going to have lots of questions about the Bavarian education system.

And I'd love to catch up with all the folk I used to chat with (even if I can't remember their usernames!). I'm on a namechange - it's MmeLindor here!

All this birthing stuff is a real eye opener for me, I have to crack on with all that in February! The amount of choices you get is massively different from the UK. And no gas and air! Goodness!
So you have a GP and a Frauenartzt? What do you see the Frauenartzt for that you don't see the GP for? My MIL mentioned that I need to get one, and that she has a good one but not that near, but I am completely stumped as to why I need one. I think DP is right and I am too conditioned to the NHS and the patchy service you get 😊

Violet you see the Frauenartz for everything gynae related including contraception, smears etc. You have regular check ups when pregnant, at least every four weeks then more frequently toward the end (I went in for monitoring every day once I went overdue) and you get scanned at each one.
Depending on your health insurance you will either go to your GP for everything else and be referred to e.g ENT, ortheopeadic etc or go straight to your specialist of choice. You also choose a paediatrician for your children (Kinderartz), they don't go to a GP.

Children can go to a GP (Hausarzt) though, Just to complicate things I have tried all the local paediatricians I think and settled on one for the routine check ups for the boys and certain child specific illnesses, another female paediatrician for dd's check ups, but the GP if the kids are "just" ill and I don't think it's a special child specific illnesses

It's a minefield. Essentially our GP is really nice and a better diagnostician than the kinderartz except for very child specific things (Kinderartz was better with DC3's mysterious joint pains and sleep problems, which the GP was uninterested in helping with but missed DD's kidney infection which the GP spotted instantly referred us straight to a children's urological unit for and turned out to be life threatening).

It's a minefield

I like our Kinderarzt. I'm a bit nervous of my Hausarzt though and want to change but I never get around to doing it.

Tonight I've been through DS's Schulranzen They are like a TARDIS! SO MUCH scrunched up paper and general rubbish. I wondered why he'd tipped all of his pencils out onto the bottom of his bag and then noticed that the zip on his Schlampermappchen is broken, plus he's cut a hole in the side of it with scissors

I also found loads of homework he hadn't done and letters he hadn't given me And a note from his teacher which he hadn't bothered to hand over.

I don't understand what they DO at school

Hi welshcake thanks for responding! Snap at Bad Homburg! My DC are 2( 3 in Feb) and 5 months. We're a dual heritage couple so I'd ideally like for the nursery also to have other kinder mit Migrationshintergrund. I kind of wonder if that's a bit too much to ask for - cultural appreciation- of Germany tbh.

Also, what is the flat/ housing market like? Is it very competitive in that area too? I have memories from Siegburg being very tight!

No Gas and Air this may need more looking into than I thought. Does anyone know what pain relief there is here?

Bertie my DS is the same. Found out today that DS has a class party and a class play the same day and time as DD has the same thing at Kindergarten. Masses of paper, with homework he reckons can be taken out of bag now. What are your term dates like? I find that the lack of half term is actually quite exhausting, and a little disappointed he doesn't finish until the 23rd.

TeaAddict we are a dual heritage family too there are lots of expats in Bad Homburg and many many families with immigrant backgrounds so please don't worry about that aspect. It is an expensive place to live as far as renting/buying goes but if you are coming on a package you should be fine. There are lots of lovely areas to live in. If you like I can PM you more detailed information re kindergartens, housing, the area in general tomorrow morning. There is definitely some helpful info I can send re getting your DD into kindergarten.

They have half terms here, they don't call it half term but it corresponds.

Something which might apply where you are - apparently the Fasching holiday is never in the official calendar but the schools get several days they can use themselves and they almost always put them in Fasching week. It always takes everyone by surprise, so look out for that.

(Anyone with kids who's new to this and has no idea what Fasching is? I looked like an idiot on my first year, happy to give heads up!)

I never knew that some states didn't get mid term holidays! We always (fully published officially) get a week at Fasching (officially Frühjahr Ferien) and a week at Pfingsten (which is called Pfingstferien so I habe no idea why The Faschingsferien isn't called Faschingsferien)

www.schulferien.org/Bayern/bayern.html

You can switch the Schulferien.org site to any state to see holidays - Baden-Württemberg for example doesn't show a February holiday but does show the Pfingstferien in June

sugar you as a parent might not be expected to attend the school ones - where we are letters about school events are not invitations just information / demands for contributions and parents are almost never expected or even allowed to attend. I once showed up to sports day and was greeted by a bemused but friendly teacher wondering what the hell I'd turned up for - he told me I was welcome to wander about and look for my children if I felt like it - I served a useful purpose removing a bee from the girl's long jump area at the request of DD's friends and watched a couple of events feeling as if I was doing dramatically unsuccessful undercover school inspection or something then went home again :o

Bertie Once DS goes back in the new year, he gets Easter off and that's it til the end of July. He has the odd movable date that have been used to make a couple of bank holidays longer, but that's it, no full week off or anything.

Weihnachtsferien
23.12.2016 - 6.1.2017

Rosenmontag
Montag, 27.2.2017 (beweglicher Ferientag)

Osterferien
10. - 21.4.2017

Christi Himmelfahrt
25./26.5.2017 (Feiertag + beweglicher Ferientag)

Pfingsten
5./6.6.2017 (Feiertag + beweglicher Ferientag)

Fronleichnam
15./16.6.2017 (Feiertag + beweglicher Ferientag)

Sommerferien
17.7. - 29.8.2017

It must be to do with the staggering of the summer, I suppose? BW is almost exactly in sync with UK holidays, it's just out by one week.

5 I think I might be the exception, if I get a letter about something (albeit late notice) it's an all out party going on at school basically. The class party last year was just that, parents, grandparents, teachers and their families, even dogs, huge buffet provided by the parents, there were presents for parents, it's also when I got given DS's school photos. Summer class party, was a family day out, picnic at a waterpark. It's just all very late notice, well in comparison to when DS was at school in the UK.

There is definitely an expectation that you're just available magically at all times, the whole school system is based on the assumption that there is a stay at home parent in the family. Not just mums though, I'll give them credit for that, at least not here.

Sugarplum - where about s are you in NRW? I'm in Essen and had a home birth with dc3 here nearly 7 years ago now. My frauenarzt was against it, but my local hospital offered it through some of their midwives. I think there is a website where you can search for a mw near you www.hebammensuche.de - worth a try, or contact your local hospitals kreissaal.

We don't have a gp - the DCs have paed and I have the FA but that's all!

I'm in Lippe dora thanks for the link. I can just about get through an appointment with my GP without having a panic attack, so I think that's where I'm going to start. I think I'm now more worried about the pain relief aspect, but will have to look into more.

Regarding providing things for schools, do you think mince pies would go down well? We have been asked for contributions for the school Christmas fair which is tomorrow. We're also expected to be there but it starts at 2, so there's no way I can manage it.

I made mince pies one year for a fair at kindergarten , I'm afraid to say they were not popular, I made scones and took jam and cream for the recent flohmarkt and they sold very well:like hot cakes actually!

I make mince pies for the English classes I teach (adults, average age about 50) and they go down well - I've been teaching the same classes (same people) for several years now and they ask for them but these are adults interested in all things English, and international (the few from other countries bring Christmas delicacies from their culture). They wouldn't go down with kids or with many parents who haven't sought out that kind of learning experience ime.

Shortbread is your answer. Everyone here loves shortbread. It is also much cheaper and quicker (anyone ever priced up the ingredients to make your own mincemeat for mince pies if you buy everything at once and make mince pies for 30 people... )

Shortbread or cheats sausage rolls (cheap Neuenburger sausages in ready made pastry) are well received.

DS1 had a Christmas party today and has a class sleep over (officially a Lesen Nacht) next week. Today we had to send food - no option to attend, and next week we have to deliver them back to school at 7pm and take in a breakfast item to share at 7:30am the next day . I start work at 6am some days... But luckily that day I am doing my fortnightly lollypop lady volunteer crossing patrol right outside the school, so 5 year old DS3 (who does crossing patrol with me because kindergarten doesn't open til 7am and DH leaves for work at 6am if I'm not doing paid early shift) will trot in with an offering on my behalf . Fortunately he is confident enough and knows everyone in ds1's class...

For those with children at school, can anyone give me any insight into what the general attitude is here when it comes to bullying?

DS is in Klasse 2, the first year did start off quite difficult for him, mainly frustration that he didn't quite understand everything and kids name calling and making fun out of him, he did lose his temper at times. He has improved massively and we have spoken to the school about how he behaves, and they are happy at his improvement.

Today I was waiting for DS to come out of school and he was taking ages, so I went stood in the sports hall door way. I watched a Klasse 4 boy square up to him, head to head, trying to shove him backwards. I then moved to the changing room door and the older boy stopped and stormed off. I took DS to the teacher, in an attempt to show him there is an alternative to getting angry and lashing out. She was so flippant and dismissive, DS walked out, and I found him hiding in a bush sobbing his eyes out. He said "see no-one listens to me" and told me that other children do naughty things and blame him so he gets told off and not them. The teacher was also aware that DS and this boy don't get on.

I know DS is the different one, and I know that last year was hard for him, and he is ready made scape goat. There is very little supervision in the playground, and children are given a lot of freedom. I'm obviously not happy at what I have seen and heard today, but before I go charging in the school, does anyone know is this normal? Are schools more likely to not interfere with children's relationships?

Sugar my daughter has had a few problems at school and on the school bus, the Rectorin has talked to all of the children involved ( all complaints by parents or children get sent to her), she likes to get every bodies side of the story she is pretty strict so her being involved seems to solve any problem.

I am very sad to here the children at your sons school picked on him for being different that certainly should have dealt with by the school better. Is it a big school he attends, I would get in touch with Rectorin hopefully she will be more concerned than your sons teacher.

I have just been to his class party and I can't say that I liked what I saw.

I watched him play a game very nicely with no arguments (even when he wasn't winning) with another boy and a girl. He changed table to some other boys who just wouldn't play by the rules, they kept not letting him have a turn, and things like that. He didn't lash out, but he did complain and nearly cried twice. All pretty normal really for kids I guess. He then got a bit fed up, he was being told the rules were something else, so he went and found the boy whose game it was and asked him, although in a whingy voice - I sat there and watched another parent and his new maths teacher (a different teacher to who I spoke to earlier) poke fun at him. There was sniggering, pointing and eye rolling all directed at him.

It really isn't a big school, there is one Klasse 2, 5 classes in total (two Klasse 1). I've not heard of a Rectorin, the headteacher is difficult to track down and to be honest, she is quite abrupt and stand off ish. I'm a little worried that this is more than just kids being mean now.