WHERE'S BEST TO LIVE IN NZ AND WHAT DO WE NEED TO KNOW:PART 3!!!!(HOLY SHIT!)

[AngryBeaver]

Can you believe we've finished finished off another thread? Jeez we can talk!!
Just an update..we've found a nice double glazed,4 bed house,with nice garden. So that's one stress off the last.
Hilongwhitecloud

They rang. We have to say goodbye to our precious little girl

AB, I'm so so sorry to hear that

If there's anything at all we can do, please let us know.

Sending you lots and lots of love. You're in my thoughts xx

Really sorry AB.

I just want to cry and howl until I'm nothing

AB, I've PMed you

So so sorry to hear this AB. words can do nothing, but please know I am thinking of you and all your family and sending my live and thoughts x x

I'm so sorry AB. I'll be thinking of you and your family.

Oh AB - I'm sitting here crying for you. I can't imagine how distressed you are. I am so so sad for you and DH. One day at a time now.

x

Really sorry AB. So, so sorry that the news wasn't better. I will be thinking of you and your precious wee girl. Xx

Going in today to talk about "my choices". I just want it over with.But apparantly I'll have to explain myself to several people first. Exactly what I need.

I have had nothing buty bullshit all day.You would not believe the catologue of crapness that is Waikato Hospital. At one point,while I still had hope of being sen today,a woman rang and tried to tell me I had to pay,then said "oh if I'd read a bit further down,I wouldve seen that you are a resident,sorry!" Like I need that at this point.
Then finally a woman rings and said they will nt do a surgical termination at my gestation because of " ethics."
I cry and say I can't go through with the birth and they can't make me etc
She rings back and says she has found 2 surgeons willing to do it...in Aukland...on FRIDAY.And that I'll have to go in on Thursday night,so they can begin the procedure,but then I'll have to "go away somewhere,to a motel or something" and then come back on Friday 8.30 am for the operation
I'm sorry,this is the first time I've said this,but this would never happen in UK.The maternity services were excellent.
They have been so utterly utterly feckless at an incredibly difficult and stressful time. I want to go home

AB, I'm so so sorry. And you're absolutely right, they are treating you disgracefully.

I hope that any further medical professional you have to deal with will treat you with a lot more humanity.

That is awful behavior on their part. Is there no chance of them letting you stay in hospital overnight? How can they even think of turfing you out in the middle of something like this. It really does make me cry for you. Are they aware you are not from Auckland and will not have a home to go back to?

Stay strong chickpea and lots of love x
E
E to go back to?

Sorry - phone did wired stuff to my message

AngryBeaver I'm so sorry to hear about your experience.

Massive Hugs from a Kiwi now living in London.

I don't know. Everyone I've spoken to has been 'nice'. But it just seems there is no communication,no professionalism,they are so disorganised. I just feel like I don't matter.That I'm some kind of inconvenience.
The last woman I spoke to was sympathetic but said that I couldn't stay at the hospital,and then I suppose,dh would have to stay somewhere, and I'd rather be with him.
But FRIDAY,a whole week away. Facing the weekend was bad enough.
It's just awful.It's like some horrble roundabout I can't get off.
And I've fallen out with my mum.
She said to dh last night "maybe someone is trying to tell you something" and really pissed him off.
He told me and I cornered her this morning I saud "I can't believe you said that.WHO is trying to tell us something?and WHY?I know you don't agree with our choices and you don't want us to have anymore children,but we are going to try again"
She got very upset and defensive and said that she didn't mean to upset anyone,that she was only tryin to help and that no..she didn't see why we would put ourselves through this again.I was her daughter,this was her grand daughter and did I not think this was killing her too? She has noone here,goes back to rented acc every night and cries.
Anyway,she didn't talk to me all day and kept going in the laundry staring at the washing machine.
Something else I don't need.
In the end I apologised just to stop the weird atmosphere.

AB, so so sorry to hear what you have been through in the past week. I can't offer any practical help, but I am thinking of you and your family. Mothers .... they get pissed off when we are pregnant and get pissed off when we can't get pregnant. I am just so sorry that you are having to go through all this. Big big virtual hugs xx

On a completely different tack - I have survived my first week in work, I am loving the squeaky drinks trolley that comes round at 4 pm on a Friday ... and there was no lemonade in sight :)

I am not religious,really,no. I'm not sure what I believe really.
But my inlaws saying things like "it's God's will" when we tell them we have lost a baby...has kind of finished me off for now. Dh has refused to tell them what is happening because he feels they will state "it is murder" and after they state that,he will put down the phone and never ever speak to them again.
On a practical note,we have booked into a nice hotel for Thursday night.
Thank you for the very kind offer of hospitality,but I don't think you would want to see me at this stage.
I don't recognise myself at the moment.