Stage IV cancer? Incurable? Roll up, roll up, this thread is for you!

Scan last night, a lovely person drove me there and back and I didn't have to undress, was all cosy in jogging bottoms, Henley shirt and so on so that's a win! :D Am silly levels of tired for all the usual silly reasons, so I'm gently phasing in and out of consciousness and trying to separate thoughts from dreams.

Rewatched the Conjuring 2 as part of my Hallowe'ening and vaguely trying to rewatch the first one but get too sleepy! Would love to watch the Paranormal Activity ones again, but no access to those.

@WrenNatsworthy Hello! Sorry to hear about your side effects (always want to call them SFX as they do with special effects in the movies) but glad they resolved. How frustrating about your post vanishing! I've never had Chipotle and don't know about Wendy's, maybe in very distant past...

@HerbalRefreshmentt Oooh very impressed by your sleep! Is the dex unpleasant/difficult for you? I actually asked my onc to let me keep taking it at the beginning of my cycle, but perhaps mine is a lower dose? (Take 8 4mg tabs over a period of 5 days each cycle.)

@TwigTheWonderKid Hope you got to Sainsbury's on the glorious day! It's wretched to feel down though. Anxiety re scans etc is not pleasant on top of whatever else one is feeling.

@mowly77 So very sorry to hear about vomiting and pain. Horrible and unfair that you have to endure it.
Paperwork is so nasty always to get through even if everything is going smoothly and the insurance thing sounds a massive hassle.
Beach shuffle in aggressively floral coat sounds like a win though and coat sounds very nice indeed, unless it's so aggressive that it insults the neighbours! Is it like the ones on Sittingsuits? Wish we could all converge on your beach for a frolic.
And you have a sparkly cape thing! I have a witchy pendant and various black clothes, oh and orange leggings so will have an outfit just for watching whatever scary things I can find after the appointment. (Did find some very scary things at back of fridge recently during a much needed cleanout but those were not the sort of chills I had in mind...)
That charity sounds just lovely! Well done you for winning a holiday!

@LuciaPillson Im on a super small dose that is really mostly preventative for rebound/flare pain - 4mg once a day for a week. However, yo we RODE the WAVE last night, I was up until 3am doing god knows what and blathering to partner and making all sorts of plans and read half a book on the Donner Party. Finally passed out and got four hours of sleep. The two nights before were dex free so... hoping I can return to them in due course!

Just got my first rads done on my broken butt cheek (I snuck a look at the screen with the scan and one side looks like a withered peach :/) and walking back to the station was so much easier than walking TO the hospital not 45 minutes before. So here is hoping this is going to help sort the situation and quick. Gotta haul in tomorrow for mid morning so I really need some sleep tonight.

Seem to have picked up a slight head cold with sneezing and runny nose only which is more annoying than anything else. Also the dex + the blood thinners = facial flushing which is no bueno.

Hope everyone else is doing as well as they can and finding something to smile about!

Well, woke up wondering if I could possibly accomplish anything today. Then took some painkillers, pulled up my pity panties (god I hate that word yet here I am inflicting it on myself and others) and did some handwashing, then sat on the floor in my bin liner and cut my hair!! Woohoo. Very scruffy and bits sticking out wrong but it always settles eventually, kind of, it's never what you'd call really presentable as it's very thin and sparse and weak and weird and contorts in all the wrong ways and always seems to be trying to flee my head and my head is also very weird so the general effect is imo rather unpleasant. But I will feel better as it needed to be done. Washed it at the kitchen sink and am even contemplating maybe getting out to the shops... maybe.

I have developed a strange toothpaste problem. Certain tastes like mint and ginger are now painful and feel like they are burning my mouth. I like toothpaste with stuff for sensitivity, but the only ones I can tolerate are kids' ones that taste of strawberry or bubble gum and of course are not meant for sensitive teeth, they only have fluoride. Every single adult toothpaste is mint and it suddenly struck me as completely insane. I have minty ones that I occasionally use very briefly but damn it, it hurts.

@HerbalRefreshmentt You know my perpetually confused mind couldn't decide whether you were saying you liked/tolerated dex or didn't (or some combination of the two)! Brain really not functioning well. I know that they cautioned me about insomnia but I think almost all my sleep issues are caused by the ostomy. I haven't found dex prevents me from sleeping (caffeine didn't use to either when I still drank caffeinated tea/coffee). But if it's helping me a little with appetite/energy it's likely a good thing... I guess, and I'm not aware of much in the way of side effects though who knows. Your poor butt cheek! I do hope it starts feeling better. And hey you know all about the Donner party which is awesome.

@LuciaPillson can I just say how much your posts make me smile? Despite your condition, side effects and everything that comes with all of that you have a wonderful energy that is so uplifting!

I don't know if it's any help at all, I'm sure you will have already looked yourself, but I came across this unflavoured toothpaste for sensitive teeth Here.

@TwigTheWonderKid Thank you for your kind words. So often I'm hesitant to post because everything I have to say sounds so dull and awful to me, but I get a lot out of everyone else's posts, that mixture of dark humour and heartfelt honesty. I haven't forgotten your plan of turning yourself into a diamond ring, it really made me laugh!

Thanks for the toothpaste recommendation, I'll check it out. What the hell is the reason for this tyranny of mint?

Told I had incurable b cancer 8 years ago Consultant wanted to stop my chemo
I asked for a Pet scan which showed no l node involvement and slow growing So here I am

Hi @Muddle2000. Welcome to our thread. Sorry you find yourself here but we all find this a comforting place to moan, groan and sometimes laugh together.

So have you been receiving any treatment in the last 8 years?

Oh yes they will do all the natural flavours probably as you say like sea algae, ptarmigan, Windigo, acorn, but then it's a kind of anti-toothpaste with no actual toothpaste ingredients so you might as well make your own out of moss and dew and birchbark.

I've been menaced by a spider in the bathroom whilst emptying ostomy pouch. Luckily avoided any terrible disasters (spillage) but a horribly uneasy time was had by all, actually only by me, spider seemed fine with the whole thing. Bastard! Now of course do not know where it is.

I'm going to have to go in again. Fecking feck. Very tired after not going to bed properly but just napping at computer (bad). Vulnerable. Sleepy. Achy. No defences. What should I take in with me? Guns, whips, chains? Cannon? Armour? Horses, batons, napalm.....Oooh, grenades?

I might have to take off and nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

Buggery, buggery feckbottoms. 🕷

@LuciaPillson thanks toy mother, I used to be terrified of spider (she used to hoover them up and then wrap about 74 reels of selotape over the end of the hose to ensure the poor creature was properly dead.

When I met DH he told me to imagine the spider in top hat and tails with tap shoes on all this little spidery feet and a winning smile. I would not say I am a spider's best friend but it's almost impossible to be properly scared of the little chap when you imagine them like that!

It's no good I'm afraid, I have the wrong kind of brain and I've just imagined the spider in a shellsuit with platform trainers, lots of gold bling, a stringy comb over with residual quiff at front and a long oily moustache. It is smoking a cigar while trying to sell my bathroom appliances on a dodgy site on the dark web. 🕸

Ok, yes you are clearly beyond help. In that case, I'd just move out and pour petrol through your letterbox as you go.

@mowly77 I'm sorry the Cape is so difficult and horrible for you. It's not ok at all. Will you get a break? Biggest of big hugs.

Oh @mowly77 Cape really is a fucker. My side effects seem to change each round and now the skin has started to peel off one of my hands.

Please come here when you are feeling rubbish, aside from all the spider talk, that is exactly what we are here for; to give and get support from people who really get it and who we can talk to without fear of overburdening them.

My cat, Smudge, suggested that seeing a photo of him might make you feel better. Typical cat!

@mowly77 I wish they could give you either a lower dose or say, a three week rather than a two week cycle to give you another recuperative week. Or something! I may be dense but don't see why it can't be more flexible.

I wish you had an extra adult available to do some more of the adulting. Useless to wish I know. But I do keep wishing hard for you and your daughter nonetheless. 💖

Evening all. How are we doing?

Had a lovely day today. My oldest friend and her husband came for a long, boozy lunch. They've been living overseas for the last 20 years so it's lovely to have her near enough to pop over for lunch, although I think she is understandably struggling with my diagnosis.

We are a little fuzzy round the edges! Well just me perhaps.

Your lunch sounds fun! It must be nice to have your friend back from abroad after so long.

What did you eat? I'm picturing, let's see, ramekins filled with something or other, pate on crusty bread.. a blended winter soup? Tall elegant wineglasses with either a robust little Shiraz or a bone dry lemony Pinot Grigio, linen napkins and french windows giving onto the garden. I seem to have started to think like a home decorating magazine, for some reason.

My friends came round briefly to drop some stuff off and I was able to give my friend her overdue birthday present. I told her if I'd tried to wrap it, it would have been at the centre of a messy ball of torn crumpled tissue paper and I'd have tape all stuck to me and I'd be crying. So I just bunged it un-tissued into a gift bag I found lying around, which she promptly gave back to me! Anyway she's got it now so it's off my mind.