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Pamela thread 5 - Bile Duct Cancer, chemo begins

1000 replies

WilsonMilson · 12/07/2023 15:51

New thread - can hardly believe it!

OP posts:
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BadNomad · 17/07/2023 22:37

Pamela, I've been a nurse for a million years, so I do have some outside experience of what you are going through. It is clear things are rough for you at the moment and it probably feels like it could go either way. If things do go down, they will go down quickly, so you really should consider bringing Jacob over now just in case. I'm sure he misses you too. Plus it might even do you good to hug him again!

Good luck tomorrow x

Bossyboo · 17/07/2023 22:37

Sending you love prayers and my sincere thoughts. You are doing so amazing and you have so much love around you from your your lovely Kerr, Jacob and your Mum and also all of us who have never met you but love and just want the very best for you. Prayers are powerful and I truly believe Jesus hears and knows our hearts no matter what the situation ❤️

Love Hope and Faith

Xxx

SquirrelSoShiny · 17/07/2023 22:37

I really hope you sleep well tonight Pamela and that Prof B can give you some encouraging news tomorrow. Lots of love and sleep tight x

Whatonearth2021 · 17/07/2023 22:40

Just catching up on the new thread. Wishing you a peaceful night and a better day tomorrow

EarringsandLipstick · 17/07/2023 22:41

I too think that's good advice from @BadNomad

I think seeing Jacob is really important, especially as you are so tired and finding it hard at times to speak / get words out.

Wishing you as peaceful a night as possible. 💐

ButtonMoonBlanketSky · 17/07/2023 22:47

Thinking of you. Xx

Museya15 · 17/07/2023 22:48

I'm a nurse also Pamela and I reiterate what the previous poster has said about getting your son over. I'm so sorry you are going through all of this.

frecklejuice · 17/07/2023 22:48

Sending you the softest hug Pamela, I’m always thinking of you ❤️

girlswillbegirls · 17/07/2023 22:49

Pamela thinking of you a lot. I am sorry about the swelling, the levels of hemoglobin and platelets dropping and all your pain and discomfort, I hope you will feel OK enough to have a good rest tonight.
I hope you will be able to see Jacob soon, I can only imagine how much you miss him.
Best of luck tomorrow when you talk to the doctor. Sending love ❤

Izzy24 · 17/07/2023 22:49

Thinking of you Pamela. Hoping for a tranquil night. 🪷🪷🪷🪷

lostinmaze · 17/07/2023 22:52

Also in agreement with @badnomad, and maybe you being with Jacob will give you comfort and strength at this really awful time, especially since you're missing him so much 💓. Also was a nurse until I gave it up due to family life. I sincerely hope you have as settled a night as possible x

Mudandpuddle · 17/07/2023 22:55

Thinking of you all. Sending strength. Xx

Ohmylovejune · 17/07/2023 22:57

Wishing you a good night and hoping Jacob can come over and give you a loving and therapeutic hug. I'm sure he's missing you too.

Good luck with the blood units tomorrow. Xx

NooNooHead1981 · 17/07/2023 22:58

You're a beautiful, wonderful person ❤ and doing the very best you can. I wish you so much love and peace, and hope you have a relatively pain-free easier night. Huge hugs 💖✨

flowertoday · 17/07/2023 22:59

Sending lots of love and a virtual hug to you and your family x

Pamela thread 5 - Bile Duct Cancer, chemo begins
MrsPositivity1 · 17/07/2023 23:00

WilsonMilson · 17/07/2023 22:21

Hi everyone, things not great today, very sleepy and quite a lot of pain and sheer lack of energy and continued swelling. Thanks for the message about my feet - skin all intact, it’s my bum and coccyx which seem to have taken a more uncomfortably hit, but Kerr massaging as much as possible. It’s almost funny that I have so much swelling but my actual bum has totally disappeared. No Kim K here!

The swelling is so bad now on my abdomen, back and legs that it’s hard to do anything at all, and yet my arms and chest are totally emaciated. Had a bit of a night with pain again, but hopefully that means tonight will be better. Just so bloody sore.

Been feeling quite faint and my hearing has gone totally wonky, so had to go and get bloods taken this afternoon, and my haemoglobin levels have fallen quite a bit, as have my platelets. In need 2 units of blood tomorrow urgently, which puts my chemo into severe doubt for Wed which is a big blow.

Speaking to Prof B tomorrow to see where we go from here. Gutted.

Grandma travels next Sunday, which in many ways I think will be the best thing to have them all be together at this time. A bit stressful for her, but there is lots of room for them to be together in NI, and maybe this is for the good.

I am quite scared now. We went to a wheelchair walk after bloods to try to clear my head. Hate the way people just gawp at me with that sort of self pitying long, I known it’s human nature, but it’s quite hard. 3 months ago is was one of them striding out.

Thanks for all the pics, messages, art, Namibia, dog pics, flowers, prayers and healing. These messages now take a while to write as I keep drifting into gobbledygook.

Hope better news tomorrow, worried though. Miss Jacob so much.

Ah Pamela, I’m sorry you didn’t have a great day. You must be missing Jacob so much. Is he staying with your mum? Maybe when you are feeling a little better he can go over and see you?

Mylittlepea · 17/07/2023 23:04

Sending love xxx🌺💐🌻 you are so thoughtful giving us updates even though we are just a bunch of strangers cheering you on from the virtual sidelines.
I would want to hug my family too, maybe that would help a bit??? Xxx

LAMPS1 · 17/07/2023 23:04

I wish you all the love and hope in the world tonight Pamela, to help you fight the good fight. You and your lovely family aren’t alone. Good luck with your appointments tomorrow. I will be thinking of you and sending you strength to face whatever comes next.

Twinsmummy1812 · 17/07/2023 23:06

Dearest Pamela, I hope the blood transfusions make you feel much better tomorrow. Your poor body is being pushed and strained on every front. I admire you for fighting so hard, I’m not sure I would have had your stamina or determination. I hope the Prof offers some good and positive news and can reassure you that the treatment is worthwhile and there is more to look forward to than you must be feeling at the moment.

wishing you a peaceful nights sleep and may you feel God’s soothing hand hold you and protect you.

Caroline x

legosunqueen · 17/07/2023 23:12

Dear Pamela, things sounds very tough, I'm so sorry. Please get Jacob across, it's really important for both of you to have that time together, particularly as you're feeling so wobbly. Gentle hugs, Lucy in West Yorkshire xxx

sunglassesonthetable · 17/07/2023 23:20

Well done to another day. You must be feeling so tired with this those haemoglobin levels.

Do you listen to anything? Books or music?
Does that help at all?

My garden has grown like wild in all this rain. I have returned to great swathes of wisteria, honeysuckle and jasmine. A second flush of roses and lots of tall verbena which I love. Tomorrow I will be out there snipping and cutting back and deadheading. My favourite thing.

I have a Bedlington Terrier and today we came face to face with another one in the park. It was love at first sight. They are a bit unusual around here so a bit of a thrill.

Good night Pam. Hope it's a good sleep tonight. Nos Da we say in Wales. 🌙🌌

Mouselemur · 17/07/2023 23:21

I think it will do you the world of good to get your lovely son and mum over to visit.
Wishing you a good nights sleep and tomorrow brings some positive outcomes. xx

AutisticLegoLover · 17/07/2023 23:36

Sleep tight and I hope you feel brighter tomorrow. Much love and prayers to you alll x

Tallisimo · 17/07/2023 23:42

Sending love x

ThursdayFreedom · 17/07/2023 23:44

I'm sorry you've had a rubbish day!!

you'll feel like a new woman after your top up tomorrow!!

i hope you can still have your chemo Wed. My friend did, even after all kinds of things!

I agree with many others. It's time to send fir Jacob, I know you don't want him to see you bad, but in my opinion he should be allowed to support you and be part of this journey with you. I'm guessing your mum coming is going to be complicated with your Gran coming to stay at yours (I think I got that right) but maybe there's someone who could help out if your mum comes to London??

Best wishes for a good night

katie
Hampshire
xx

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