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Not a good day. leukaemia diagnosis.

975 replies

biscuitsandbandages · 14/04/2014 03:44

When I woke up this morning I was a mum of 3 with an 8 week old baby.

Now im a cancer patient on thr coronary care ward.

This cannot be happening to me.

OP posts:
StillProcrastinating · 29/04/2014 20:32

I find this quite uplifting... I have liked it on Facebook, and follow it that way, but here's a link to the blog.

It's a photographer who takes portraits of folk around and about New York, and does a short interview with them. The interviews are often really interesting and often quite life-affirming. It really does put a human face onto total strangers.

www.humansofnewyork.com

Only1scoop · 29/04/2014 22:21

Huge hugs lovely biscuits xx

TheMightyMing · 29/04/2014 22:33

Hello beautiful biscuits,

Been following but not posting because Of log in problems.

You will get through this and get better, because you have to! That's all. I am praying, hoping and keeping everything crossed for you, as are so many people on your thread.

God bless and keep you, and keep on posting xxxxx

Spinaroo · 29/04/2014 22:46

Night, Biscuits.

Still thinking of you and your family x

Timetogetserious · 29/04/2014 23:28

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ.

biscuitsandbandages · 29/04/2014 23:38

Thank you being the today even though I haven't been posting. I have been reading and mending my soul with your kind words and funny links :-)

This evening I want to tell you about my darlings. I love them so much and they are my strength and reason to keep going.

DH is my best friend. We have been married nearly 10 years and our anniversary is in a few months. He is gentle and kind. His main flaw is he cares too much about people and gets himself into scrapes helping other people at his own expense. He is messy and disorganised but not for want of trying, but he cleans, cooks, helps with the children, gets up with the baby at night and we share the household stuff 50/50 when both of us are working and he has never once grumbled about it. He is my main support and I am his. I don't know why we work and of course we snap and argue like any tired stressed out couple..... We both work in the same profession and the hours and intensity are long..... But we just work together.

My DS1 is 6. He is gentle and kind, adores his younger siblings and wants everyone to like him... And they usually do. He is slighter and not as strong as his younger brother and was very ill when he was born but is a crazy dancer, lives singing made up songs and is creative. He taught me how to be a mummy.

My DS2 is 4 but thinks he is 6. He is solid muscle with momentum behind him to floor a small elephant, a wicked sense of humour and is fast to hug and crack a joke. He is in many ways his brothers protector but has a soft vulnerable side and needs a lot of reassurance that he is doing ok.

My DD is 10 weeks old. She is the last little link in our family. We always wanted 3 but financially we thought 2 was the sensible plan so we waited and worked and thought we would see what the future brought. We didnt want an age gap larger than 4 years as the boys are so close and when that point came that a decision had to be made we just couldn't see ourselves without her. There was a person missing from the dinner table. We even knew her name. We decided to give it one month. If it happened it happened. One month later I was pregnant and 8 months after that our family was ready to start the next stage of our lives together.

She is perfect, just reaching 9lb i think though need to weigh her again, chubby cheeks and spiky hair and a gorgeous gummy grin just for mummy and daddy mainly so far. She settles in my arms and likes me to sing to her and stroke her face. Our bond is stronger every day despite our limitations on time and I see her emerging personality and she is beautiful.

That's more than I planned to write so thank you for reading if you made it to the end. I am the luckiest mummy in the world and I just need to evict these leukaemia invaders and get back to my family for good.

Sweet dreams xx

OP posts:
lougle · 29/04/2014 23:54

That was beautiful, biscuits. I hope you get some rest tonight.

saffronwblue · 30/04/2014 00:02

Biscuits I absolutely loved reading about your beautiful family. Your love for them just shines out. Hope you are getting some sleep now and well done for enduring another day of treatment. X

deserttrek · 30/04/2014 00:12

Crikey, Biscuits

Your post may well hit the national press! Smile

If there are two matches on the register, the competition to be your donor is going to be fierce now! They will fighting each other off with a muddy stick.

What a fantastic post to roll over from one day to the next !!!

fidelineish · 30/04/2014 00:49

The way you write about your family is lovely. You are very lucky to have four extremely good reasons to grit your teeth and get through this treatment.

(The national press had better not come pawing through this thread Angry I do not think biscuits would appreciate that at all).

Hope you get some decent, dreamless, sleep tonight Smile

Swex · 30/04/2014 01:20

Morning biscuits. I love reading about your family, thank you for sharing a little glimpse of them... Hope today is a better day - keep faking it till you make it.

imip · 30/04/2014 06:55

Lovely little gang you have there biscuits xxx

Stuffofawesome · 30/04/2014 07:29

A whole tin of biscuits! They sound lovely.

yegodsandlittlefishes · 30/04/2014 07:30

That is wonderful, your family is in many ways typical of many, I am sure millions of people around the world could identify with you. In ssome ways you are an Everywoman; as if anyone could have cancer detected by accident. There are people who live in fear of it at home while with their family. Whearas you are working towards thinking of being with your beautiful, life-loving family throughout your treatment, urging us to also make the most we have got. Thank you! Flowers

Spinaroo · 30/04/2014 07:30

Morning Biscuits.

Lovely to read about your family- you do indeed have many real live reasons to fight back. Keep doing just that x

Mama1980 · 30/04/2014 07:51

Morning biscuits, your family sound gorgeous. Here's hoping you have a better day today x

Only1scoop · 30/04/2014 07:55

The 'mini Biscuits' sound adorable....
Thinking of you all xx

BeingAMummyIsFabulous · 30/04/2014 08:28

Hello Biscuits, I just wanted to tell you how much I admire you. I loved reading your post on your family, your love for them is beyond words. All your babies sound adorable each in their own little way, and your DH is exactly what you need. Stay focused no matter how hard it gets, it won't be long until you are home with them all again. Good luck and I hope today is a good day for you all.

thekingfisher · 30/04/2014 08:41

beautiful

TheMightyMing · 30/04/2014 09:14

Morning biscuits!
Family information was lovely to read - hope you slept ok and that today is a good day xxxx

ajandjjmum · 30/04/2014 09:28

Your family sounds perfect - and your comment about DS1 teaching you how to be a mummy made me smile - you'll keep learning, my DS is 22 and I'm still learning!

Hope today is kinder to you, and that you have some special moments with those you love.

And the baddies are gradually being exterminated.

AWombWithoutARoof · 30/04/2014 09:34

Morning to the Biscuit Posse!

What a great sounding tribe you have, being loved is the best thing ever.

Misfitless · 30/04/2014 09:39

HI Biscuits,

Haven't posted for a few days, as everyone else seems to have already said what I want to say, iyswim.

I've been lurking though, and praying for you, and will continue to do so.

Thanks for sharing about your family...it was lovely to read about them. They must give you such focus and strength, and you them, too.

xx

nearlyreadyforstatelyhomes · 30/04/2014 10:40

He taught me how to be a mummy

^ Thank you for writing this. It's really articulated something that I feel with DD yet hadn't got as far as articulating in my own head. Really struck a chord. Thank you. must stop crying now, stupid preggo hormones

Your family sounds lovely. And you do too. Best wishes for today.

Mumsfret · 30/04/2014 10:58

Biscuits, I, like many others, love checking in, reading your posts and hearing how much stronger you appear to be growing by the day.

I haven't always posted as not always sure what to say. I've also been languishing in hospital myself, following emergency surgery to remove a large tract of colon owing to severe Crohn's disease. Last week was The Hardest Week Of My Life but somehow, after hitting what felt like rock bottom, I saw some reassuring/comforting light through the darkness. It's pulled me through.
I, too, left behind an amazing DH and 3 DDs (youngest 4 months &, until recently, exclusively breastfed). Hard times. I know where you are...

I've been holding your hand, though you don't know it, and gaining strength from and identifying with your posts. Thank you for being there! I hope you can feel the handholding too!

One of the junior docs who keeps coming in to visit me - to keep my spirits up - recommended Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now, which I promptly loaded onto my Kindle & am furiously devouring. Not previously my kind of "thing", and occasionally a bit ethereal & turgid for my taste, but it has really helped me through this phase. I wonder if it might suit you too?

Victor Frankl's next on my list. Talk about turgid! Perhaps I need to indulge in more chick lit! Grin

Keep going, strong lady. You have everything to survive for. Am right beside you.