Left baby in car for a minute

[LifeOnAmber]

I need some advice.

Earlier today we were at a retail park. I was in the shop whilst my husband stayed in the car as the 15 month old was asleep and the 4 year old didn't wanna go in.

I forgot to take my purse. So he brought it into the shop whilst the kids were in the car.

Our car was directly outside the shop. Well not immediate but the second row. But it was in the eye line.

My husband popped in, handed over and went back. It took less than a minute.

When he went back out, a very cross lady was on the phone and with a face like there are abandoned children. He obviously said they are mine. She showed disapproval.

Then he hears her reading out our number plate to someone on the phone and that the parent is here. I guess she called the police?

Basically did we break the law or is it negligence? What can we expect?

Let’s face it OP, you wouldn’t have left the shop to get your purse because of you precious shopping/place in the queue. Your husband wouldn’t have given your purse to a passer-by the give to you out of fear of it being stolen, and yet, you happily left very young children (presumably the most precious things you have) unattended. Doesn’t make sense really does it.

I am a bloke and I'm not seeing any real or harmful misogyny.

'Karen' is a joke.

One day I'll google the history.

It's not a joke if your name is Karen. Like my sister.
Its horrible.

Take it from women, being called a Karen is not funny.

There was the small risk a curious 4 yr old could have left his seat and if applicable, depending on your model of car, let the handbrake off so the car could roll.

However, the women who pulled you up on it was OTT.

@mjf981 I sort of see her point but unless she habitually behaves that way or spend too much time on Facebook I'm not sure I'd see the offence.

That poster's spelling is fine and the phrase didn't need quotation marks. As your children were alone in the car when she parked next to you, she was right to phone the police as she had no idea how long your children had been left. She would have been negligent not to call.

To save your googling... its a term originally used to describe white racist women in the US trying to cause problems by playing the victim.
But has descended into an insult for any woman, usually middle aged, who dares voice an opinion.

If you see children in a car with no adult surely you check if they're distressed and watch for the adult, who has likely gone on a 30 second errand, to return.

Having the police on speed dial in an instant is a massive over reaction.

Same with dogs. They die surprisingly fast in hot cars but it's cool, a window's cracked open and doggo looks happy no worries for a bit of time.

Why did he have to buckle the 4YO in again when he got into the car? Was child not buckled in before he left?

IME it's used for behaviour that goes way beyond expressing an opinion; people who think they own the road outside their house are a case in point.

you didn't do anything wrong. Neither did the woman though

you might get some sort of follow up call but it will all be fine

But she had no idea she was being OTT did she. In some circumstances it is fine in others yes it can be placing your children at risk and it can be prosecuted (paying at a garage forecourt isn’t)

at that moment even though you and your DH knew the plan she didn’t and was rightly looking out for your children.

now if a simple sorry my wife forgot her purse I was just giving it to her was had there wouldn’t be a problem

I would have done the same OP.

If you have your cards added to your phones wallet, you can pay without having a purse these days.
But yeah, I don't imagine the children would have come to any harm, most people have to leave them in certain places for short periods. Its not like it would have been a blazing hot day as its been a cool September so far.

It was a minute and I suspect it would carry a higher statistical risk to take them across the car park than to leave them in the car. Perhaps different in the middle of summer where overheating would be a concern but that doesn't apply.

I'd never leave my 7yr old in the car alone for even 40 seconds.
Only because the bloody car alarm would go off if I locked it with her in it 😂

Basically did we break the law or is it negligence? What can we expect?

the fact your dh was beside the lady on the phone whilst she read out the reg plate of your car - he was there in attendance.

CCTV will be in the carpark for anyone from the police to ask to view

Police will make a note of this incident.

I doubt any further action would happen, unless you have other reports from school, hospital etc that paints a picture of you building a pattern of neglect

I think there has been more accidents in the home statistically in the last 23 years since that article was produced 🙄

There's often a setting to lock the car without enabling the internal motion sensor.

But it wasn't in eye line if he popped into the shop where you were mid queue and didn't want to leave was it? Which makes me think he was probably gone longer than you said. Why wasn't the 4yo strapped in? I don't think you can blame the other woman here, she saw two young children left alone in a car and did the right thing.

I think in a petrol forecourt most people will understand the parent has gone to pay.
OP's DH must have been gone for more than a minute. Why did OP not come and get her purse? If at the checkout she could have explained?

My job for today 😂
Cheers

Nope. That wasn’t what OP said at all. The woman pulled up next to them as he was leaving the car. As he was walking back to the car he saw her looking concerned and then she got her phone out. As he got back to the car she was calling the police and he was near enough for her to tell him he shouldn’t leave the kids in the car. Then as she was dealing with her own kids and he with his, he heard her giving the number plate details.

So the children were left alone for a couple of minutes max for the whole thing if OP is accurate with the time line. And the woman wasn’t concerned that the children were in danger or had been abandoned because there was a parent right next to her within talking distance as she made the call - he was clearly back and dealing with the kids before she was even connected.

In your situation I would have gone back to the car for the purse.

However I also think I'd hang around for more than a minute before calling the police if I saw children alone in a car. I would hang around though and judge the parents, maybe call after 5-10 minutes. 5 if it was boiling hot weather.