Deceitful behaviour from school - don't know where to turn

[godofthunder24]

Hi,

My son's school denied him access for 3 days last year due to his mum having COVID. Following our own research we determined that it was unlawful for the school to deny access for this reason.

Once we presented the legal advice to the school they changed their advice and altered their criteria for allowing my son back into school. It seems very clear to me that they were concerned about the repercussions of unlawful actions and tried to misrepresent their original instructions.

I complained to the school and I've gone through the complaints process with the chair of governors, a complaints panel and the DfE.

The governors have consistently provided inaccurate information during the complaints process which I strongly believe is their attempt to cover up the schools original actions. The governors have access to all of the evidence which is in email form but they continue to misrepresent that evidence.

The DfE have confirmed that the decision to deny access was unlawful.

The Local Authority are not willing to do any other than ensure the school is adhering to the complaints process from now forwards.

I am literally sick to death of feeling wronged by the school and not having a channel that will listen to me and go through the evidence in sufficient detail.

I don't really want to go down the legal route myself but feel like I'm running out of options. Would be great to hear any advice from someone in the know or someone who has been through something similar.

Many thanks,
Ian.

Hopefully this thread will help you see that it’s absolutely time to draw a line under this now and get on with your life.

Sometimes things don’t work out as we’d hoped, sometimes you get ‘punished’ when you’re trying to do the right thing, sometimes people believe the other side over you even if you’re the one that’s right, but that’s just life.

It’s been almost a year, nobody can change what’s happened, the only thing that you can change is your reaction to it. So please, Ian, accept that it’s not ideal, but also see that moving on is doing yourself and your family the biggest favour of all.

Why did she tell them, so?

Testing hasn't been done for years?
Get a grip!

I have Covid at the moment and i am really ill with it

People are still testing
You don't know the whole country!

Let it go already.

As I've said many times on here now, it's not the exclusion I'm so bothered about. It's more that the school, it's teachers, it's governors and anyone in public service signs up to a code of practice. If you have evidence that people are breaching that code don't you have some right to expose it?

I think the Daily Mail would be more than happy to publish your plight along with the obligatory sadface photo. If you can get your wife and son in it, even better. Why not give them a call?

Sackcloth and ashes at the gate maybe!

Oh, for heaven's sake, it's nearly a year since then and he doesn't go there anymore. Put the bone down, Ian.

What a waste of public money. All that staff time wasted on this utterly pointless power trip.

I would love to hear the wife's side of things in this relationship. I hope she knows about MN as I am getting vibes that she might need it one day.

You sound like a nightmare parent. You don’t even have anything to do with the school any more! Yes the school got something wrong and we’re a bit sneaky in covering it up, but guess what? It’s not the first time and it won’t be the last time that a school has made a bit of a hash of something and tried to gloss over it. Such is life.

Your son missed a few activities, that’s all.
Will it impact his future job prospects? No.

What a weird thread.

I do fully focus on my son. He misses out on nothing.

Christ how on earth would you react if something really bad happened to you!

A whole cohort including dd2 missed the last term of year 6 entirely and had zero leavers events due to covid. They just got on with it.

Thank god. Keeping him out of this nonsense is the best thing you've done.

Teachers are leaving the profession in droves and dealing with entitled parents like you is a big part of what's driving them out. My OH teaches primary and he's sick of parents acting like he's their personal employee and that he's beholden to them. Your son's old school made a mistake. An unfortunate one. But your grievance will have cost that school time and money and for what? So you can boast to the other parents on the class WA group that you were right? What a hollow victory.

Thank you for a very balanced and polite response.

I feel sorry for the wife.

Last week of school. Staff absolutely on their knees. Positive covid test. Perfect excuse for a few days off chilling at home.

Oh boy, did that blow up...

I think you're right! If they can get this simple issue so wrong, what else are they getting wrong? If it's causing you pain thought, it might be healthier to let it go.

I would consider maybe talking to a local paper.

After all of this, if you do force them to apologise, it will mean nothing. They will be saying the words to make you go away. It's like when you 'force' kids to say sorry. Most of the time they say it to make you stop moaning at them- and- will still believe they are in the right.

So the apology will be worthless.

They will say the words, close the door after you've left and roll their eyes, glad that they've got rid of you.

Time to give it up and move on. It's not healthy for you or your family.

Well Ian, you turned to Mumsnet. Has it helped? What are you going to do?

This reads like a really convoluted Lee and Herring joke about a man called Ian Covid

You've spent the best part of a year getting worked up about a school that your son is no longer at over 3 missed days?

So she didn't need to test and didn't need to tell the school.

You're unbelievable @godofthunder24

Covid a simple issue? That is part of the problem the guidance was changing all the time and I am sure at times no one really knew what the processes were if you got a positive test never mind if a family member got it.
Which is why the vast majority of us stopped testing because the impact of trying to figure out what to do with a positive test was just too much of a headache

This is how you get made a vexatious complainant. I've dealt with a man like this at a school where I was Chair of Governors briefly. He was furious that his son had lost his jumper which had no name on it. Which his class teacher had suggested he might not need to bring in the morning when he turned up wearing it and it was past 30c. Parent said no he needed his jumper because the weather might change. It was July 2022 and was a little bit hot if you recall. Kid took jumper off at some point and put it somewhere. We showed dad the lost property. He insisted none of the other dozen or so identical jumpers were his son's and complained and got others to complain on his behalf as we had made his son worry in case it got cold. It continued for about 5 months and we had to bring in the LA as the dad absolutely wouldn't listen to any response from the school. If it had been double that time I think we would have all resigned as he was a complete pain. His emails were barely read other than to see what human rights law we had broken. He seemed to think there was a black market for a shabby school jumper that a 9 year old had lost

I hope your wife and son never do anything to 'disappoint' or disagree with you.

Your ability to hold a grudge is impressive but rather disturbing

I must admit, I really admire your enthusiasm for a cause, especially your family. I do wonder whether it might be brought to bear upon other causes though? There are many groups who would relish your passion for a just outcome.