Deceitful behaviour from school - don't know where to turn

[godofthunder24]

Hi,

My son's school denied him access for 3 days last year due to his mum having COVID. Following our own research we determined that it was unlawful for the school to deny access for this reason.

Once we presented the legal advice to the school they changed their advice and altered their criteria for allowing my son back into school. It seems very clear to me that they were concerned about the repercussions of unlawful actions and tried to misrepresent their original instructions.

I complained to the school and I've gone through the complaints process with the chair of governors, a complaints panel and the DfE.

The governors have consistently provided inaccurate information during the complaints process which I strongly believe is their attempt to cover up the schools original actions. The governors have access to all of the evidence which is in email form but they continue to misrepresent that evidence.

The DfE have confirmed that the decision to deny access was unlawful.

The Local Authority are not willing to do any other than ensure the school is adhering to the complaints process from now forwards.

I am literally sick to death of feeling wronged by the school and not having a channel that will listen to me and go through the evidence in sufficient detail.

I don't really want to go down the legal route myself but feel like I'm running out of options. Would be great to hear any advice from someone in the know or someone who has been through something similar.

Many thanks,
Ian.

What do you want to happen? What outcome are you looking for? (Not being snarky, just so you can get decent advice).

I would just change schools, it seems like the relationship has broken down totally.

What do you want to happen
how did a three day absence so materially affect your son that it has led to a huge escalation of complaints?

Are you serious? 3 days? Not ideal. But honestly, give it up. It sounds like your relationship with the school has irrevocably broken down however so I'd consider moving your child.

I don't really want to go down the legal route myself but feel like I'm running out of options.

Go down the legal route for what? This seems a lot of angst over 3 days of school.

This was pre Christmas then?
Why does 3 days matter so much.

I get you feel wronged but surely you just move schools if you think they haven’t got your best interests at heart?

Why did the school know his mum had Covid? So people still test? This seems much ado about nothing. Hope your son enjoyed his days off ☺️

You sound like you have nothing better to do. The school have been spoken to and it was 3 days! What outcome do you want? My guess is monetary compensation or someone fired which is unreasonable and unrealistic.

How did the school know that your child's mum had covid?

I honestly would let it go and move on with your life!

It sounds inside of the school was completely in the wrong and wrong to try and deny it now. On the other hand, there's nothing to be gained by pursuing it. So you should move on. I completely get the loss of trust because they have lied, but for me it would be a big thing to move my child to another school if they are happy where they are.

It's a decision many of us have to deal with when we lose faith in an institution. But that's life, especially where people we care about are concerned. To make the best decision for them.

Unless there is more to this I don’t understand why you’re still pursuing this or what you want to happen?

I work in a job where I frequently have to deal with people who get utterly obsessive about wrongs that they perceive to have been done to them, allege all sorts of conspiracies and dishonesty and take things to the nth degree in cases when most often the truth is that someone has just made a human error. It’s good to raise it and complain so it doesn’t happen again and it’s not ideal your child has missed school when they shouldn’t (I’d be cross ) but bigger picture - what’s done is done, you’ve been through the complaints process, and if you’ve really lost confidence in the school then move your child.

To echo others.

What do you want to happen? What outcome would be ideal?

How much of his education has been missed compared to how much time you have spent arguing about it? Would that time have you spent on this that could have been spent with him?

Just change schools and be done with.

This seems to be fairly fundamental.

Putting aside the fact they shouldn't have stopped your DS from attending, why are you thinking you need to pursue legal action? What was so catastrophic about him missing three days? Was he in the middle of his GCSEs or something?

I'd be interested to hear what the child and his mum think about it as I think, kindly OP, that you may have become a bit fixated on being 'right' and until you get that confirmation, you cannot let this rest.

I think that will have more impact on your son and possibly your relationship with his mum if you are still together, than the child missing 3 days of school. You know you were right, measures have been put in place to make sure it doesn't happen again, is that not enough for you?

Drop it, go spend time with you child and welcome some peace in your life.

All this over three missed days? What a spectacular waste of time and energy.

Move on!

Move on with your life.

In 100 years we will all be dead. Stop wasting everyone's time on this.

What do you actually want from the school? An apology? Them amending their records if his absence was wrongly recorded? Them admitting they were wrong/did the wrong thing? Financial compensation? What exactly is your aim here?

How many GCSE or A-level exams did your son miss? I mean otherwise this is weird. The affect on your son of missing 3 days lasted 3 days. Now everything is good. Even if it was illegal apologising and making up for the suffering that someone didn't experience as a result of your actions a year ago isn't really possible!

It’s ok, Ian here says he is ‘literally sick to death’ of it, so the problem will take care of itself soon enough.

This seems like a lot of fuss over 3 days… you won’t get anywhere so let it go or move schools

I don’t understand what the fuss is about. It was 3 days. Has it had a major impact on his education??

At least your campaign of harassment will give the staff something to talk about in the staffroom.