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Original poster

Husband Stopped Paying Financial Order

87 replies

Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 15:09

Hi Guys,

My parents divorced in 1990. My father lives in USA and in October 2021 he stopped paying what he should as part of their financial order. I think he thought as he is in another country it would be hard to enforce. My mum is 80 and has suffered with depression for 20 years. There is no way she would be able to deal with this herself. I contacted him stating if he didn't pay the money outstanding she would get a lawyer to report the breach to court. When I contacted him I put a copy of the consent order in with the letter. Today I received a letter from his solicitor in the UK asking for her details as they are unable to deal with me, and she has broken the confidentiality of their divorce by giving me the paperwork.

Has anyone had this happen? Should I be worried?

Thanks

OP posts:
Collaborate · 02/03/2023 15:27

No you shouldn't be worried. Tell them that you are dealing with it as your mother's Mackenzie Friend.

The way to go about this is to register the order with the REMO unit at HMCTS and ask them to enforce it. International enforcement of such orders is complicated and relies upon the state where he lives to have contracted with the UK to premit reciprocal enforcement.

gogohmm · 02/03/2023 16:07

I'll be honest though, 31 years later I'm not sure a court would enforce the order. It's almost unheard of now to have such a long financial order. Before you continue, think about whether you are likely to be successful.

Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 16:20

Collaborate · 02/03/2023 15:27

No you shouldn't be worried. Tell them that you are dealing with it as your mother's Mackenzie Friend.

The way to go about this is to register the order with the REMO unit at HMCTS and ask them to enforce it. International enforcement of such orders is complicated and relies upon the state where he lives to have contracted with the UK to premit reciprocal enforcement.

Thanks, I thought a Mackenzie Friend only related to issues in court though?

OP posts:
Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 16:21

gogohmm · 02/03/2023 16:07

I'll be honest though, 31 years later I'm not sure a court would enforce the order. It's almost unheard of now to have such a long financial order. Before you continue, think about whether you are likely to be successful.

The order states whilst both of them are alive though.

OP posts:
PeekAtYou · 02/03/2023 16:23

I don't know if having Power of Attorney would help here but maybe another poster will know.

Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 16:37

PeekAtYou · 02/03/2023 16:23

I don't know if having Power of Attorney would help here but maybe another poster will know.

It would, but unfortunately I haven't, and there is currently a 20 week wait for one to be granted.

OP posts:
Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 16:38

My concern is my Mum getting into trouble for giving me a copy of the financial order.

OP posts:
BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 02/03/2023 16:43

I don't think there is any confidentiality associated with a divorce unless it's specifically mentioned as part of the divorce order. I imagine that some high-profile or famous people might want to keep the details confidential but if you Mum wants to nominate you to act on her behalf there's no reason why not. If there was something that ordered confidentiality then your Dad's solicitor would have quoted the exact part of the order. That hasn't happened so it's just bullshit.

Collaborate · 02/03/2023 16:46

Contrary to what is posted above these things are confidential, but an exception would include confiding in a close friend or relative.

PeekAtYou · 02/03/2023 16:46

While there might be a problem if you posted photos of the actual paperwork showing names, I can't imagine it being confidential.

Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 16:55

PeekAtYou · 02/03/2023 16:46

While there might be a problem if you posted photos of the actual paperwork showing names, I can't imagine it being confidential.

I sent my father a copy of the financial order in the post.

OP posts:
titchy · 02/03/2023 17:00

It's hardly going to be a secret from him is it given that he'll have had his own copy! Don't worry.

Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 17:06

titchy · 02/03/2023 17:00

It's hardly going to be a secret from him is it given that he'll have had his own copy! Don't worry.

Thanks, my thoughts exactly.

OP posts:
TooTrusting · 02/03/2023 17:17

There is a confidentiality clause that sometimes goes into a consent order if there is a particular worry about loose lips (not just used for celebs). But it's not a standard clause.
If there is no specific confidentiality clause then your ability to share information is still limited - see this leaflet.
www.gov.uk/government/publications/talking-about-family-proceedings-outside-court-ex710

As a family lawyer getting all shouty at an 80yo's DD trying to help her DM seek legal advice/redress when the XH is in contempt of court is the last thing I'd be doing.
Write back and say that you are assisting your 80yo vulnerable DM in circumstances where their client is in deliberate contempt of a court order and you are baffled that the sole concern being voiced is confidentiality.

Lifelong maintenance orders are indeed vanishingly rare now, but that in itself is not relevant and your DM has one which she is entitled to enforce. They come from an era 22+ years ago when there was no sharing of pensions, and in "big money" cases the wife only got what she "needed" with the husband keeping the rest. So joint lives orders made many years ago were common where the husband was a big earner.

Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 17:23

TooTrusting · 02/03/2023 17:17

There is a confidentiality clause that sometimes goes into a consent order if there is a particular worry about loose lips (not just used for celebs). But it's not a standard clause.
If there is no specific confidentiality clause then your ability to share information is still limited - see this leaflet.
www.gov.uk/government/publications/talking-about-family-proceedings-outside-court-ex710

As a family lawyer getting all shouty at an 80yo's DD trying to help her DM seek legal advice/redress when the XH is in contempt of court is the last thing I'd be doing.
Write back and say that you are assisting your 80yo vulnerable DM in circumstances where their client is in deliberate contempt of a court order and you are baffled that the sole concern being voiced is confidentiality.

Lifelong maintenance orders are indeed vanishingly rare now, but that in itself is not relevant and your DM has one which she is entitled to enforce. They come from an era 22+ years ago when there was no sharing of pensions, and in "big money" cases the wife only got what she "needed" with the husband keeping the rest. So joint lives orders made many years ago were common where the husband was a big earner.

Thank you, My father was also sending the payments from a joint account with his wife, so it would be fair to assume he has told her what the payments are for, and also breaching confidentiality.

OP posts:
Soontobe60 · 02/03/2023 17:29

I’m gobsmacked that he has been paying for 30 years! Even if you were born the year they divorced, surely he should have stopped paying when you were 18? I assume your DM, at 80, will be getting a pension?

Littleflowerseverywhere · 02/03/2023 17:30

Soontobe60 · 02/03/2023 17:29

I’m gobsmacked that he has been paying for 30 years! Even if you were born the year they divorced, surely he should have stopped paying when you were 18? I assume your DM, at 80, will be getting a pension?

I think it’s spousal support. It was more common 30 years ago

DoristheDuchess · 02/03/2023 17:32

Surely he'll just take it back to court and apply for a variation? he could cite change in circumstances and ask the court to review based on his current financial position.

Relying on spousal maintenance is so precarious, the payees circumstances can change dramatically and therefore they can ask for a review if they can no longer pay.

Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 17:34

DoristheDuchess · 02/03/2023 17:32

Surely he'll just take it back to court and apply for a variation? he could cite change in circumstances and ask the court to review based on his current financial position.

Relying on spousal maintenance is so precarious, the payees circumstances can change dramatically and therefore they can ask for a review if they can no longer pay.

His property is worth in excess of £1 million. He had very well paying jobs and will have extremely good pension schemes.

OP posts:
Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 17:35

Littleflowerseverywhere · 02/03/2023 17:30

I think it’s spousal support. It was more common 30 years ago

Show quote history

Correct.

OP posts:
DoristheDuchess · 02/03/2023 17:39

Are you sure the property isn't in joint names with his current wife? This may have been done without your knowledge, or he may have transferred assets to her.

Why wasn't there a pension sharing order at the time of divorce?

In kindness OP, I think you both need to brace yourself that he will fight this possibly through the courts whatever you believe his circumstances to be. Does your mother have money for legal representation?

Littleflowerseverywhere · 02/03/2023 17:40

Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 17:34

His property is worth in excess of £1 million. He had very well paying jobs and will have extremely good pension schemes.

Show quote history

Has he just moved to the us?

how old is he?

Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 17:50

DoristheDuchess · 02/03/2023 17:39

Are you sure the property isn't in joint names with his current wife? This may have been done without your knowledge, or he may have transferred assets to her.

Why wasn't there a pension sharing order at the time of divorce?

In kindness OP, I think you both need to brace yourself that he will fight this possibly through the courts whatever you believe his circumstances to be. Does your mother have money for legal representation?

The property is in joint names.

I can't really see there being much of a fight. He has broken the financial order without any contact. No, it'll be down to me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Freakzilla · 02/03/2023 17:51

Littleflowerseverywhere · 02/03/2023 17:40

Has he just moved to the us?

how old is he?

Show quote history

Over 20 years ago.

70

OP posts:
DoristheDuchess · 02/03/2023 18:03

I hope you're right OP. Sounds like he'll just keep dodging paying now.

How is your mum managing without the monthly spousal maintenance payment?

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