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Original poster

Legal DNA test

30 replies

SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 17:07

Hi

I have been asked by a man that abused me to agree to a legal DNA test to confirm if my DS is related to him. I believe this man could be a danger to my DS.

The DNA company have asked for pictures of myself and my DS, that they will pass on to this man in the report. They have said this is a legal requirement of the test. Surely that is a massive safeguarding issue, passing on a picture of my child to a potentially dangerous man, who man or may not be related to him?

Thanks in advance!

OP posts:
Summerholidayorcovidagain · 16/05/2022 17:10

Unless a judge orders a dna test just ignore his letters.

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 17:14

Thank you. I am worried about it going to court and him gaining PR.

OP posts:
MooseBeTimeForSnow · 16/05/2022 17:20

Is he the father of the child?

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 17:21

I don't know. I was assaulted by him around the time of conception. My DH is named on the BC.

OP posts:
Summerholidayorcovidagain · 16/05/2022 17:22

He would have to apply (and pay) for a judge to order dna testing..

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 16/05/2022 17:23

Has he considered he would be liable for Cms I wonder? A lot of men talk the talk about dna tests.

Russell19 · 16/05/2022 17:27

Ignore it

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 16/05/2022 17:27

Maybe ask him to consider a positive test could result in his arrest.

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 17:29

Thank you

OP posts:
Isaidnoalready · 16/05/2022 17:30

Wait for a court order

I assume dh knows about this?

Move house?

Did you report the assault?

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 17:41

DH is aware. DS is 2. I didn't report it at the time.

We're not in the same house but I believe courts can trace me and I'm still in the area.

OP posts:
Summerholidayorcovidagain · 16/05/2022 18:40

Op please read articles by Louise Haigh.. She petitioned for rapists to be refused PR and access etc. Court hearing was 3 years ago. Some info a solicitor could use should you feel one is necessary in the future..

TulaOfDarkWater · 16/05/2022 19:49

Can you do a DNA test with your DH? If your DH is the father then you can just ignore him & resolve it easily enough with the court should he try to go down that route. You can also look into reporting him for harassment etc.

If it turns out your DH isn’t the father though, it buys you some time to gather your thoughts, get legal advice, come up with an action plan & get some counselling in advance of any court action this man may take. This will allow you to take back control & be more prepared should this end up in court, forewarned is forearmed & all that.

Would you consider reporting the assault now?

I’m sorry you’re going through this & wish you all the best.

NotDavidTennant · 16/05/2022 19:55

They have said this is a legal requirement of the test.

If this hasn't been ordered by a court then there is no legal requirement to do the test let alone send pictures.

I agree with the suggestion of getting your DH to do a test first. That would give you some control over the situation.

MrsGluck · 16/05/2022 20:03

If this hasn't been ordered by a court then there is no legal requirement to do the test

^This

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 16/05/2022 20:08

They are playing on words to get you to comply op. I had to do court ordered dna tests and yes you need signed passport photos of yourself and your dc. You haven't been ordered to do tests. Keep all correspondence though if it becomes a police harassment report scenario..

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 20:16

Thank you all so much

OP posts:
purplecorkheart · 16/05/2022 20:20

Company is spouting crap, they just want to scare you into beliving what they say is true.

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 16/05/2022 20:39

Op EVEN IF you get a letter from a solicitor requesting /insisting /demanding you take the tests you aren't legally obliged to do so. Only upon being in a court and a judge stamping an order must you do them. My exh had his solicitor send me a letter demanding I remove my new blinds as he was now unable to see into my home. I didn't remove them. No judge ordered they be removed.. A solicitor will write whatever shite a client requests of them.
If you are getting stressed - I imagine you are - seek a free 30 min appointment with a family solicitor.. Set your mind at rest.

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 20:45

Thank you all. I did have an appointment with a solicitor but he said it's better to agree to one myself as court will always demand one anyway. I was worried it would then move on to them forcing access, rather than me agreeing to less outside of court. I think we will test my DH, we didn't before as DH loves DS either way. Thank you all so much.

OP posts:
Isaidnoalready · 16/05/2022 20:48

SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 17:07

Hi

I have been asked by a man that abused me to agree to a legal DNA test to confirm if my DS is related to him. I believe this man could be a danger to my DS.

The DNA company have asked for pictures of myself and my DS, that they will pass on to this man in the report. They have said this is a legal requirement of the test. Surely that is a massive safeguarding issue, passing on a picture of my child to a potentially dangerous man, who man or may not be related to him?

Thanks in advance!

Do they have your new address?

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 20:50

No he doesn't have my address at the moment.

OP posts:
Hellfire2 · 16/05/2022 21:04

Why not do a dna with your DH and child. That way you'd know without your abuser knowing if you know what I mean

Original poster
SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 21:06

Yes thank you I think that is what I will do. I think I've just put it off but I should have done it as soon as he got in touch.

OP posts:
Isaidnoalready · 16/05/2022 21:08

SouthySouth · 16/05/2022 20:50

No he doesn't have my address at the moment.

Return to sender the letter "not known at this address" take your name off the open register of electors might buy you some time?

Also report the assault