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Original poster

AIBU to think I can fight this? Mumsnetters I need your help!

283 replies

FigureItOutNow · 09/09/2017 10:11

Please be gentle with me - I'm very stressed over this!
Sorry it'll be a long post but bear with me.

Last week my divorce from a very abusive husband was finalised. I'm late 20s with 3kids under 7 from this man. As part of the abuse he completely isolated me from my family.
Anyway my younger sister has some friends in a nearby big city - she said if I could find a sitter she'd come to this city and we could go out with some of her friends to celebrate (I have no friends at the moment). My neighbours 20year old daughter offered to babysit overnight as long as I was back by 9 as she had work later that day.

On the night out I drove up to city with intention that if I wasn't in a fit state to drive back home by 8am next morning I would get a taxi back home and then come back with my kids on the train ( they love trains) to pick up my car so I parked it somewhere where I knew I wouldn't be charged if I had to leave it at 8am.

On night out I managed to drink far more than I could handle (easy as I haven't drank in years due to abusive ex being controlling). I started feeling really sick at about midnight (2hours into the night) and somehow got split from my sister and her friends. I was feeling really crap and decided to go sleep in my car. I messaged my sister and told her where I was and she said that's fine they'll get me from the car on the way back to her friends.

I was fast asleep in passenger siding my car but alarm kept going off and someone called the police. They came at about 3am and it took them about 5min to wake me up as I was so gone. Anyway they started trying to say that I was drink driving and I said how could I be drink driving if I'm fast asleep in the passenger side? Lots of yeah but you were planning to weren't you/stop lying/ tell the truth type of statements. I was so upset at this point called my sister and had her confirm our plans, even showed them our messages with our plans to go back to her friends.
There were 4 police officers at this point and I could hear discussing if they could charge me with drink driving to which one of them said no but they could charge with being drunk and in charge of a vehicle. They came and told me that they were arresting me for this charge. They asked me to breathalyser but I refused as I was paranoid they were trying to frame me for drink driving (I know I know but I was really drunk and this was a stupid thought process) and I asked them so many times why they wanted to breathalyser me when I had openly admitted that I was drunk and NO INTENTION at all of driving but was waiting on my sister and her friends.

Anyway they arrested me - so so so distressing for me as I've been driving since I was 18 never had a parking/speeding/any ticket whatsoever as I'm one of those annoying people that follows the law to T as I'm terrified of getting arrested (oh the irony).

In the end I spent the night and most of the day in cells, they dropped all charges except the one of failure to cooperate by refusing to breathalyser so please mumsnetters help me figure out if I can fight this. I'm a lone parent and I work in the healthcare industry so could potentially lose my job over this as my solicitor said it would come up as a criminal record in all my pre-work checks!!!

I don't understand why the officer never said it was a criminal offence to refuse the breathalyser, when he asked me to do it and I said I didn't understand why he was asking me to do it he said that he was asking me to do it and that was all the reason he was giving

OP posts:
happypoobum · 09/09/2017 10:15

The offence is being drunk whilst in charge of a vehicle I believe. I have seen other people prosecuted for this, but that charge has been dropped you say?

And you didn't do the breathalyser as requested so that charge will stand. I don't think saying that you needed a full explanation of why he was asking you to do it, or ignorance of the law will stand up as a valid defence to be honest.

Maybe other posters will have experience of this though?

LairyMcClary · 09/09/2017 10:16

I don't think you can fight a charge that you know you are guilty of. You did refuse to co-operate and you did refuse the breathlyser. on what grounds can you fight the charge when you admit it?

Original poster
FigureItOutNow · 09/09/2017 10:17

Sorry posted before I was done

...at that point I asked him if I legally had to do a breathalyser and he said no so I don't understand how it's a criminal offence to decline one - I didn't refuse I declined as I thought I had a choice. If he's said you have to do this to legally comply with the process I would have done it.

Please please help me mumsnetters this will have huge implications for me!

I was let out on bail and will go back in 2 weeks to face the charge, my solicitor has said I should plead guilty but this will give me a criminal record and with the job I'm in I really really can't afford for this to happen!

Can I write a letter to judge explaining my situation and begging for mercy? I genuinely wasn't up to anything bad just really have shit luck apparently as many of my sisters friends have told me stories of police officers dropping them off home or calling them taxis instead of charging them.

Please help me!

OP posts:
19lottie82 · 09/09/2017 10:18

I think you need a solicitor rather than the advice of randoms online OP!

Crazycatsandkids · 09/09/2017 10:18

I had no idea you aren't allowed to have a nap in you're own car!

Farfromtheusual · 09/09/2017 10:18

Failure to provide a sample of breath is basically the same as providing a positive breath test and I believe carries the same penalty.

Not sure how they can charging you for failing to provide if they're not charging you for drink driving though? Seems a bit heavy handed to me.

Original poster
FigureItOutNow · 09/09/2017 10:19

Thanks yes they've dropped the drunk in charge of a vehicle charge but have persisted with the failure to cooperate by refusing to breathalyser - oh I'm up s**t creek without a paddle, aren't I 😭😭😭😭

OP posts:
happypoobum · 09/09/2017 10:20

So it will be your word against the police officers? And you were pissed as a fart?

I don't fancy your chances to be honest............

ItsAllAboutThePace · 09/09/2017 10:20

Maybe as you were 'so drunk' he did say it but you were too 'gone' to hear correctly

Or maybe it's pointless explaining everything to a drunk who was being difficult?

LairyMcClary · 09/09/2017 10:20

at that point I asked him if I legally had to do a breathalyser and he said no so I don't understand how it's a criminal offence to decline one

You were drunk enough to be fighting with the police and thinking they were framing you, and yet you remember precisely what was said about the breathlyser? Pull the other one!

PantPlot · 09/09/2017 10:21

I would follow the advice of your solicitor tbh

Original poster
FigureItOutNow · 09/09/2017 10:21

Yes apparently it's illegal to be drunk in a car with the keys on you - I cried so so so much when they said this and said they were charging me for it.

I just don't understand why they needed a breathalyser when I said I was drunk and knew I was over the limit. I wasn't planning to drive, showed them messages of my plans and they refused to have any of it

OP posts:
user1499786242 · 09/09/2017 10:22

Didn't want to read and run
What an absolutely horrible situation!
You were trying to do the right thing by sleeping in your car! I'm glad they've dropped the other charges, and it's just shit awful that you're being charged for not taking the test
If only he had explained this at the time!
I really do feel for you, especially as you were out to celebrate leaving an abusive man
I really hope your solicitor can help you avoid this charge!
Good luck!

Maudlinmaud · 09/09/2017 10:22

You already have a solicitor. I don't see the point of this thread.

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 09/09/2017 10:23

To be honest, if you were that drunk, can you honestly be sure of your clarity of recognition of the coversations?
The charge here will be drunk in charge of a vehicle (not drink driving) which I'm afraid you were and you refused a breathalyser. Did they give you another chance to take one when they took you to the station?

This might help a little with info btw
www.ibblaw.co.uk/service/road-traffic-offences/drunk-charge-motor-vehicle

LairyMcClary · 09/09/2017 10:23

I just don't understand why they needed a breathalyser when I said I was drunk and knew I was over the limit. I wasn't planning to drive, showed them messages of my plans and they refused to have any of it

They needed proof of your drunkenness, obviously. And why would they believe you, if you had been planning to drive you would have lied about it, wouldn't you?

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 09/09/2017 10:25

As per other posters, I would take your solicitors guidance on this.

Original poster
FigureItOutNow · 09/09/2017 10:26

Yes I did think that maybe I was too drunk to remember. And maybe I was
And it may seem strange that I seemingly kept a cool head enough to ask questions like that when I was drunk but I work in a very very high pressure environment where you completely and utterly have to keep your head on even when everything is going completely balls up and that's the only explanation I can offer for how I was managing to ask anything. To be fair I was probably too drunk to understand his reasoning anyway but if I was that drunk can they really charge me as that would mean I lacked capacity to understand what was going on?

OP posts:
Lucked · 09/09/2017 10:26

I don't think you can fight it. Just thank you lucky stars you weren't charged with being drunk and in charge of a vehicle.

I was warned about this recently because I leave a change of shoes in my car when drinking and use to sit in the drivers seat with door open whilst changing them but a solicitor friend told me off. I now make sure they are in the boot and check there are no police around when accessing my car!

lilwayneslisp · 09/09/2017 10:27

Sounds like you just love playing the victim and refusing to take any responsibility for yourself and your actions.

FabulouslyGlamorousFerret · 09/09/2017 10:27

Firstly, calm down, this really isn't the end of the world although I'm sure it feels like it!

Get yourself a solicitor for dealing with the legal side of this and, it is what it is ... you won't go to prison or lose your children, so it's really not that awful.

Work wise, go and speak to HR and explain to them how you have explained this to us, show them the messages to back your story up. If you are a good employee then I'm sure it will be ok.

Future jobs won't necessarily be affected, you just need to disclose it (usually at interview iirc) I have been on an interview panel many times when an applicant has a past criminal conviction, often silly things like this or crimes committed in their times. These disclosures alone would not preclude an applicant from being considered for a job, non disclosure of a conviction always did though.

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 09/09/2017 10:28

Personally I'd be grateful that they're not charging you with everything.

Farfromtheusual · 09/09/2017 10:29

Sorry to say OP but I think so!

Although I work for the police, I don't know an awful lot about this side of things so hopefully someone who does will be along soon!

Original poster
FigureItOutNow · 09/09/2017 10:29

I have a solicitor who's attitude seems to be that I refused the breathalyser and now this is the consequence - I understand 150%
But my very abusive ex has had numerous charges e.g. driving over the limit with the kids in the car without seat belts and they were dropped so I'm on here asking as I think there must be ways around this if he can have a charge like that dropped? Maybe I'm naive and stupid - forgive my ignorance

OP posts:
ItsAllAboutThePace · 09/09/2017 10:30

You got yourself drunk ..... took 2 hours to get yourself inn that state

You do seem to be playing the victim here.....saying ' I was drunk' like it's normal and should cancel out any wrongdoing?