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Original poster

What happens if I don't turn up in court?

109 replies

saoirse17 · 23/05/2017 20:44

My ex-husband has filed a C100 application regarding access to the children.

I can't afford a solicitor but I had some advice that it doesn't matter if I fill in the form that came with his application when I had it in the post, so I have not done that.

I've now had a snotty letter from my ex asking why I haven't filed it. I was under the impression that his hearing will take place whether I fill it in or not. Is that not correct?

Also, what happens if I don't turn up in court on the day? I have no interest in taking part in his court case.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 23/05/2017 22:56

Seek proper legal advice. You can't rely on strangers on the Internet for this.
And a court would send a mother to prison if they believed it was warranted.

fuzzywuzzy · 23/05/2017 22:58

I fought for my dc for years thro the courts against vile abusive ex. I was told categorically I could not ignore any court dates otherwise the judge would find in ex's favour and I could potentially lose my dc to him.

If you want to keep your dc get yourself a solicitor and turn up to court.

SuperBeagle · 23/05/2017 23:01

They will arrest you if you don't obey a court order. It is considered custodial abduction.

Familylawsolicitor · 23/05/2017 23:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadamePomfrey · 23/05/2017 23:05

You need legal advice from someone with the all the information on your case!!!

That said! And I have no legal background so if I'm way off I apologise! But think how it looks to a judge, father wants access to his children hires s solicitor to fight for that! Mum doesn't fill in form! Father continues to fight and goes to court mother doesn't show! Think how easily this can be painted as victim father fights for children while mother can't be bothered! If you give them no information they know nothing of your reasons what he says is all they have!

Familylawsolicitor · 23/05/2017 23:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

prh47bridge · 23/05/2017 23:21

The advice I had was that court orders re contact is very hard to enforce anyway so it doesn't really matter what gets decided

The courts are increasingly willing to enforce contact orders. They have a range of options to make you comply from sending you on parenting courses through community service to jail. Yes, you really could go to prison. And you really could find that residence is reversed so that your children live with their father and you only have limited contact.

I remember your previous thread. You come across as a classic case of a mother who is alienating her children from their father. I said on that thread that it would not go well for you in court if you turned up and said the things you had said there. Not turning up will not improve things for you. If you carry on down your current path you risk losing your children completely.

MrsBertBibby · 24/05/2017 07:41

www.bailii.org/ew/cases/EWFC/OJ/2017/B24.html

Have a read of this. 9 year old objecting to contact sent to live with dad. On the day of the order. The mother found to be harming the child by alienation.

And look at the last paragraph. The move was fine and the child was happy at last.

Wake up OP.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 24/05/2017 08:01

I remember your previous thread

Actually so do I.

You were warned about what you were doing then yet you are continuing as you were.

You seem to think you can't be touched because you are a DM. Well yes you can and you will be.

You need to go to court.

Leatherboundanddown · 24/05/2017 08:10

If there are no safeguarding issues found (like, real ones, not ones you have made up in your head) then he will likely be awarded whatever contact arrangement he is asking for. Especially if you don't turn up.

What is he actually asking for? You could just agree so you don't have to go to court.

If you can't do that then you will have to self rep or use a macenzie friend. You may not find one willing to accompany you if you are being unreasonable though.

RebootYourEngine · 24/05/2017 08:11

Why would you not go and fight for what is right for your children

leighdinglady · 24/05/2017 08:17

I just can't understand people who don't want to fight for their children. Maybe they are better off with their dad, at least he can be arsed to try

sadmommyhere · 24/05/2017 08:44

It's very funny that you think like you do.

I hope you don't go, perhaps the children will go on to be very happy without you

unfortunateevents · 24/05/2017 08:48

I remember your previous threads as well. Your dislike and contempt of your ex are in every post you write. If I recollect, your youngest child is now 7 and you have been divorced for a number of years. If your 7 year old still doesn't want to see her father, step mother and new sibling after all this time it can only be because of your attitude and what you are dripping into their ears, because nowhere have you mentioned that their father is abusive, neglectful or anything else. Certainly the circumstances of his getting together with his new partner are not ideal but that is something for the adults in this situation to deal with. Responding to every situation involving your ex by bleating about not wanting to, or just refusing to deal with it is not doing your children any favours or going to influence the courts. It is truly time to grow up and start trying to undo some of the damage which is being done to your children.

Mooey89 · 24/05/2017 09:01

OP I am currently going through the court process for the past 9 months.

You absolutely have to go. You just do.
Fwiw so far I have found them to be very supportive (DV issues) - I am actually currently waiting for Cafcass to arrive... I have fought tooth and nail for what is right for my child, as you should if you have genuine concerns. Otherwise they will just award him what he wants - who is going to advocate for you and your child if you aren't there?!

Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 24/05/2017 10:32

I spent 4 years fighting for my dc. . The hearing will go ahead and you will be discredited for not appearing.

Your dc could be given to exh full time if you don't attend. .

And you won't get them back.

Trethew · 24/05/2017 11:18

Have just read MrsBBs link.

OP It's real and recent, I strongly suggest you read it and imagine how things could turn out

babybarrister · 24/05/2017 13:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

blueskyinmarch · 24/05/2017 13:46

I don’t understand why you have no interest in attending a court case with will directly affect your children. I expect the judge would take a very dim view of you not being there and would find in favour of the father. They won’t just leave it be because you are their mother and you have 4 children. I am a social worker and i have a dim view of your ability to put your children first just from one post. Imagine how you will look before court officials?

Original poster
saoirse17 · 24/05/2017 14:19

I have arranged to speak to a solicitor on the phone this afternoon. Hopefully she can give me some guidance.

I just think everything was working fine until he had to go around and make court applications, my main concern is that the children have got very upset by him dragging their mum to court.

OP posts:
blueskyinmarch · 24/05/2017 14:23

I think the message you need to give your DC is that you are not being 'dragged' to court but that you are going willingly in order to do what is best for them. Hope you get some good advice from your solicitor.

DixieFlatline · 24/05/2017 14:27

If your children are very upset it's due to things you have been saying to them. Be a decent parent.

AyeAmarok · 24/05/2017 14:28

They are upset about him dragging you to court, so you're going to fix that by just not turning up? Hmm

Fluffypinkpyjamas · 24/05/2017 14:28

If you can't even be bothered to show up what message do you think that sends about you? Why on earth would you even consider not going! Back story?!

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 24/05/2017 14:29

I just think everything was working fine

Apart from it wasn't was it. He wasn't seeing his DC.

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