Can't shake the broody feeling! Am I crazy for wanting a fourth?

[Jessb2019]

Hello!

So I'm a mum of 2 DDs (7 & 3) and 1 DS (5months)

After our second, I knew I was done. I felt it. I wasn't broody and just knew.
But 2 years later my coil failed and as soon as I found out I was pregnant I was over the moon.
I spent my entire pregnancy thinking that this will be our last and like with my first two I loved every second. Even the labour and birth.

DS was born in October and it's been perfect. I've felt more able and relaxed this time and have enjoyed every second. Then suddenly, since DS turned 3 months I have this overwhelming feeling of being incomplete. I'm broody. I watch my 3 littles and I know I am
Not done having babies and that are family isn't complete.

I was to my DH and he said he agrees we aren't "done" but we need to get a bigger house- either moving or extending ours. We currently have a 2 bed which we were meant to sell last year but it fell through. And our area of living is extortionate. So we are looking to start the process of moving again next year.

My question is, has anyone else felt like this? Like unexplainably happy and uncontrollably broody all at once. I've never had this before. not with my first or second. Both times I felt done.
Has anyone felt like this after 3?
This whole lockdown isn't helping as I've literally thrived being mummy in this. And it's made me reconnect and love it more than ever.

Was also wondering if anyone else has 4 children in a 3 bed home?

Hope this makes sense!

Xx

Four kids in a three bed house isn’t enough space is it?

I felt very similar to you - after my 2nd I felt like we were done. Then my 2nd turned 3 and I suddenly felt very broody. We had our 3rd child last March when my other two were 4&5. Through the whole pregnancy it was decided he would be our last. For the first month or so after he was born there was no thoughts of ever wanting a fourth. When he turned around 6 months I had an unshakeable feeling of broodiness again. He turned 1 last month and that feeling is still there. My husband is on board. It’s just as to when a good time would be. Definitely not until coronavirus is over would I consider falling pregnant. Ideally I’d want a 2-3 year gap. Any more and we would struggle with bedroom space (we have 4 bedrooms but with the kids ages it would be hard with a bigger gap)

@hannahlouise4026

That's how I'm feeling exactly. Would want about the same age gap as I have between my second and third which is 2 years.

We have no intention of trying till next year. We just need to sort our house out first which was going well till this cv

I had 4 in a small 3 bed we ended up relocating when the youngest was just 9 and the eldest 17 and got a bigger house.

We were ruthless and had the minimum of possessions and had well thought out storage. It was fine 🤷🏽‍♀️

I know the feeling.
What do you want to do? Consider your gut feeling too. I had my third child a few months back and already I feel like I want a fourth baby. But we are waiting till 2023 as I kind of want the kids to be older. I waited three years this time around before giving in. I do not regret my decision either. It was the right one for us. I once read a magazine article about someone who had ten children. I have talked to my partner. I think that we both want another but are equally happy to wait three more years. Every few months we talk about adding to our family.
Do you have a big house or not? When we eventually have another we will have relocated to another area. That probably won’t happen this year I know and I do not have the energy to cope with two under two anymore. So we will see. Either way good luck with your decision. I hope you are at peace with whatever you decide to do in the end as well.

It’s quite interesting... this lockdown has brought into sharp focus what I consider to be my shitter side as a mum, I’m rubbish at craft and indoor play and thrive when I’m taking them to the library, when we do swim lessons, when they are with me at the swings.

And even though sex is the absolute last thing on my mind, I am fully aware that when #1 was a year old I conceived #2. When #3 was conceived, #2 had just turned one.

So our third is one next month and the desire is there but I would have to appeal to DH. I would also not wish to proceed without stable employment as we are both in precarious positions thanks to the COVID19 economic shitshow. If we held off I would be over 40 when #4 came along and that makes me nervous.

In short, if DH is on board do it... but please wait until the house conversion is complete. Building work + babies = bad idea

Ps: I’d suggest you consult your DDs as well, yes they are 7 and 3 but their thoughts should be taken into consideration too.

@PaulHollywoodsSexGut (ps love the name 😂) I feel similarly to you re being shit at staying home doing crafts etc. I feel I thrive under pressure of doing lots with them, our lives are so busy and I just find I’m increasingly snappy as I don’t have any plans or fun outings to do.

Madness. Two kids more than enough for our world.

Do you have enough time to give it individually to each of four children?

Do you have enough money that you won’t have to be at work more, which defeats the purpose of having them in the first place?

I’m sorry but I think it’s hormonal and it would be better for the world if you didn’t have any more children. Sorry. Plus we are about to go into the biggest recession in nearly a century. It’s just not the time to be having babies when you may lose your jobs. Sorry. None of us know what lies ahead but the next five years at least will be hard.

@staircases wow 12! I'm quite fascinated, may I ask you a few questions?

I have 4 in a 4 bedroom house and it's chaos. We have extended to 5 but it's cost us a fortune and we both work as 4 children costs loads. They are 10 8 6 and 3. It's really hard work. I wouldn't chnage it but not a chance in a 2 or 3 bed house I'd be so unhappy unless there was a big garden we could play in all day

I have 4 in a 3 bed, yes i would like a bigger house but not the end of the world. My kids are happy thats all that matters. Material things arent a big thing to us.

@staircases wow 12, how old are they all? I would love a bigger family