BFP after IVF - the journey continues (part 2)

[HopefulllHolly]

SENSITIVE CONTENT

Continuation of previous thread for anyone with a BFP following IVF to support with anxieties and other worries that come along with pregnancy after infertility.

@AnnieStar12
@DippyDuck19
@DogMummy87
@Edf
@Fluffyted
@Leaf86
@LouP87
@Natty2
@SETTC87
@ThePeachGoose
@jas1996
@lemonyfox
@oliviagrace2307
@summerchild92

Please tag anyone else I’ve missed accidentally!

@DippyDuck19 baby brain is so funny! Your mixing words together sounds hilarious 🤣 😆

Hi all… can’t quite believe I’m (tentatively) stepping in to this thread. Just had second FET with a few small tweaks to protocol.

Had a barely there vvvfl on a FRER on 5dp5dt, husband couldn’t see it.

Today 7dp5dt the line is faint but definitely visible to the naked eye - photo below. Did anyone else’s look like this at this stage? Still just a shadow on the cheap one.

Ive never had a hint of a second line before this!

ps congrats to everyone here - I recognise a few names!

@Sierra26 hi 👋🏼!! Congratulations on your POSITIVE test result!!! Awww what exciting news, you must be overjoyed!! 😍❤️
I still remember the day I tested and it was the most amazing, emotional & happiest moment.
I didn't test until day 15dp5dt (I was convinced if I tested early I'd jinx it 🤦🏻‍♀️) so I don't have any experience with the faint lines but lots of ladies on here did if I remember correctly.
When I had my failed transfer there was no line there at all when I tested so based on that I'd say any line is a good line!!

@Sierra26 congrats!! This is pretty identical to mine at 7dp5dt 😊 when is otd??

Thank you @Fluffyted @Edf ! Relief to hear it doesn’t look unusual.

Because it’s still so early and the line isn’t strong yet, we’re trying not to think too far ahead and are just enjoying getting to this point, which is further than ever before. But secretly I’m going mad!! I’ve dreamed about seeing those two lines for SO long…

OTD isn’t for another week, Tues 24th. My clinic seems to leave it really late. We’re actually on holiday with friends who don’t know anything so adds a whole other level of craziness. Used my last FRER today, have more cheapies but need to sneak off today to buy a few more good ones.

@Sierra26 whoa, congratulations. How exciting. Line looks great! Love seeing that second line come up :)

@Fluffyted thanks for your message, that's reassuring that it took a bit longer for you too. Really really hoping it won't be much longer for me.

@DippyDuck19 Hope you made it safely to glamping!

@AnnieStar12 3 more days until you’re there! How are you feeling? I definitely wouldn’t worry about not feeling anything yet - my midwife just skirted over the fact I had and said they don’t really ask until 24 weeks so you have 4 weeks yet before that. At first mine were tiny almost imperceptible little taps from the inside - I didn’t have the rolling feeling until later. I definitely would have missed it if I was moving around. I only felt it at 19.5weeks and when I was lying down ready for bed. So with you running around after your daughter and being busy I wouldn’t be surprised if you haven’t felt anything to be honest! It’s only been this week (almost 22 weeks) that the movement is strong and definitely no denying it’s baby. Before this week I could have passed it for general tummy feelings I think and some days she must have been tucked away as I felt nothing! So definitely don’t stress about it yet ☺️

@Sierra26 I think I remember you from another thread! Congratulations! 🥳 It’s such a lovely feeling. Do you know when your clinic will scan you? Gosh it feels like yesterday I saw those two lines - the best feeling after so long of negative tests. I wish I could have bottled the feeling. How are you feeling generally?

@Sierra26 congratulations!!! your test is similar to mine at 7dp5dt on the frer and mine was barely there on the cheapie too!

@AnnieStar12 don't worry about not feeling movements just yet. You will soon, am sure!! You still have plenty of time. If you're busy running after a LO then it's definitely harder to notice in the early days.

@HopefulllHolly I made it to glamping. Was soo cold overnight and then had a little panic this morning as hadn't felt baby move! He was just having a lie in after his busy day yesterday!

@Sierra26 it's such a good feeling but totally get it that you don't want to get "carried away" just incase! We were all in that boat. I don't think I really believed it until after the clinic scanned me and I saw the little baby blob. I think it's just all part of this crazy IVF pregnancy journey.

@AnnieStar12 it's hard not feeling anything, I was so worried. You'll probably be so surprised by how much your little baby is moving at your scan!! Mine was kicking all about but facing my back so all the movements would have been really deep inside so I'm telling myself that's why I couldn't feel anything. Even at my scan the sonographer wasn't worried I hadn't felt anything. Like @HopefulllHolly said I don't think they are bothered about it until after 24 weeks, and soooo much growing will happen in the next 4 weeks, I'm sure you'll feel your baby moving about soon 💕

@HopefulllHolly the nursery is coming along nicely! @DippyDuck19 my god you two either have heaps of energy, either you’re very motivated. That nesting instinct must have kicked in! I have not lifted a finger on ours yet and I’m started to feel guilty lol

@HopefulllHolly thanks for sharing your experience with the bump and kicks. The bump is definitely bumping, but I really look forward to start feeling those kicks, though not keen on all those headaches! Something that I forgot to share from my 16 weeks appt is that I didn’t get any mobile number for the midwife like other ladies here did. I even asked about that and they were like nah, email us if non-urgent or call the EPU (different numbers for under 18 weeks or over 18 weeks) if urgent.

@Fluffyted congratulations on feeling kicks regularly now! How wonderful. Which brands did you have luck with in terms of maternity wear? I’m struggling to find my sizes in jeans at Seraphine and H&M, so I ordered from Jojo Maman Bebe and that pair was too big, so clearly sizes don’t mean anything lol Ah I so get you with the MIL. Mine was driving me up the wall at the beginning of pregnancy but she's been good lately, she hasn’t been sharing any unsolicited advice in the past month (knock on wood that this continues). Maybe she got used to the idea or maybe she’s shared it all! But there will definitely be another round when the baby is here lol I'm not out of the woods yet

@AnnieStar12 hopefully you’ll feel the kicks soon but the scan will definitely reassure you. Is that on Friday? I can't wait to see our baby again. The wait between 12 and 20 is pretty long, isn't it? The only thing that reassures me is seeing this bump getting bigger.

@DippyDuck19 Hes probably still in a food coma 🤣🤣

@ThePeachGoose Yeah I have had a bit of an energy boost but it’s mainly down to the fact I want to get things done 😅 I was going through our calendar and we don’t have any free weekends until end of October apart from this weekend coming so I want to get the panelling done. Then we have some coving being installed in 2 bedrooms the start of October and then have to paint both ceilings then. So it’s more out of necessity than because I’m full of energy haha! But equally it’s nice doing it and knowing it’s for baby. Weirdly after the 20 week scan I was like “right let’s get on with it then!” - you’ll probably be the same 🙂
The kicks are amazing tbh - i just sit and smile like a Cheshire Cat when I feel them! Won’t be long for you! Really annoying they don’t give you a midwife’s mobile number - to be honest mine said text her about anything but if it’s past 24 weeks then just call the hospital rather than her. And I imagine if anything was wrong before 24 weeks she’d just send me to EPU so it probably won’t make much difference but it does give you comfort having it. I got given 3 midwives numbers at my 12 week appointment - so I have too many choices of people to annoy 😂😂

Thanks all @HopefulllHolly @AnnieStar12 @DippyDuck19 . Honestly feels so surreal - one of the most euphoric moments of my life so far!

Feeling good, although had a woozy turn earlier and yesterday and had to fill my face with sweets. Not entirely unusual for me though so potentially unrelated!

Im actually not sure when my clinic will scan, haven’t even read the instructions they gave for a positive test and I didn’t take them on holiday with us. All I know is I need to call on OTD and I think I can one scan, but not sure when. Will defs be booking in an early private one! Anyone know the earliest the scanning clinics will see you?

@Sierra26 Ahh how lovely. I think most clinics scan you at 7 weeks but sometimes it’s earlier, sometimes later. I genuinely wouldn’t go for a scan any earlier than 7 weeks - I mean it when I say you will see nothing at all and will leave feeling more anxious. I’d wait for your clinic scan and then if you want to plug the gap between that and the 12 week scan by having one at 9/10 weeks then you’ll see much more (mine looked like a little jelly baby at 9.5 weeks). There are loads of threads on the pregnancy board on here about people having early scans and then being in total meltdown because they were measuring behind or there’s no heartbeat - I really wouldn’t put yourself through it!

Thanks for the advice @HopefulllHolly , really appreciate it! Can imagine how disappointing it would be to not see anything if going too early. By the time we’re home from holiday I’ll be 5+4 so isn’t too long to wait until 7 to 8 weeks. I have a feeling my clinic scan at 8.

How are you getting on? Xx

@Sierra26 At least you’re on holiday to pass the time and get some lovely sunshine too! All that vitamin d will be great for you and the little bean! ☺️ Im all good thanks - just cruising now really! After 20 weeks there’s no more scans and just midwife appointments so it’s not very exciting in terms of seeing anything other than your body changing and stuff! But time is going quickly now and with each week that passes I feel much less anxious (I think I can safely say that almost all of us on here have been anxious messes throughout to the 20 week scan and then you start to accept it’s real! 🥹)

Oh god, so sorry, totally missed your post this morning @Sierra26 CONGRATULATIONS! On the early viability scan, I would just wait for the clinic’s scan (usually at 6-7 weeks) because that’s when you’ll be able to see the heartbeat as well. If they won’t scan until 8 and you’re curious, you could get a scan after 6 weeks, the heartbeat should be developed by then, and some clinics would offer that. As @HopefulllHolly said, you won't see more than a jelly bean and a few flickering pixels, but that does wonders to put your mind at ease :)

@HopefulllHolly oh agree, I’ll probably feel more fired up after the 20 week scan as well. Wow 3 midwives numbers! I can only hope that the email goes to all of them and I wouldn’t have to wait long to hear back, but so far I've found all of the answers on the NHS website

Lots to catch up on!
Firstly @Sierra26 - congrats!! We were on the June FET together and so pleased for you! Seeing those two lines for the first time felt so surreal and tbh still does! Keep us posted on how you get on and enjoy your hol!

@DippyDuck19 @HopefulllHolly love hearing about your nursery progress! We've got a bit of renovation works to complete by the end of the year so DH is busy doing lots of building! I've finally made a spreadsheet of all the stuff we need to buy/ or borrow if we can etc have a meeting at Mamas and Papas at the weekend too.

@AnnieStar12 best of luck for your 20 week scan this week and fingers crossed for feeling some movement soon.

@ThePeachGoose pleased to hear you had a good 16 week appointment! Countdown to the 20 week scan now

@Fluffyted glad you're feeling constant kicks! I'm
Sure it is the best feeling in the world 💕

For me I'm at 18 weeks this Thursday, feeling ok and desperately waiting for that 20 week scan and movement! The scan will actually be closer to 21 weeks, which feels ages away! Will be nice to slowly start buying some bits after then 🥰

Sorry if I've missed anything else!

Hi all! Hope you’re good today!
@ThePeachGoose Im sure it’ll probably get a quicker response than me texting - she took almost 2 days to come back to me about headaches and at that point I’d gone to the GP. 😅

@Natty2 Oooh love a renovation! Hope it’s not too much of a bomb site!

Birth related question for anyone considering a natural birth -

I want to have a natural birth but with an epidural but I don’t want any interventions like forceps or the suction (read a lot about tearing and the babies come out bruised and all misshaped so I just can’t do it), I would have an emergency caesarean if they couldn’t get baby out in this situation. I also strongly don’t want an induction at all, so I want to opt for having sweeps instead and hope baby comes on its own and if she doesn’t then have a caesarean so I’m not too past my due date. Is this allowed or is it totally pointless?!)
So two questions (and I’ll obvs ask midwife but I was wondering if anyone here had views - especially those who are well researched or have babies already):

• What day should I start having sweeps? Guessing the midwife will advise when they’d usually start them but just interested!

• What day should I give as a deadline for baby to come naturally? I don’t want to go too far past EDD tbh because it’s a slight increase in risk the later you are (and my partner was 2 weeks late and came out scaly 🤣). I was thinking of opting for a C-Section at 41 weeks and give her a week to come out naturally - that way it’s kind of the best of both.

Anyone have thoughts?

@HopefulllHolly I have a list of questions like this for my 25 week midwife appointment.

Some hospital trusts do not allow ivf pregnancies to go past 40 weeks because we are soo certain of our dates and there's a risk of placenta failure. So this is the first thing I want to ask.

In which case I'd like sweeps from 38 weeks if possible to avoid induction. I'm not completely against induction but would like before my due date if I was to have one. And if not progressing then C-section around due date.

I too do not want forceps, ventouse or episiotomy too!

I think if you want to go past due date, I would be asking for extra monitoring.

Our area won’t let Ivf go past 40 weeks for that reason @DippyDuck19
i was induced at 37 last time (pre eclampsia) and also episiotomy despite her only being 5.13lb but I had epidural and at that point I just let the experts take over and tell me what was best in that situation.

I’d be interested to hear your midwife’s answers @HopefulllHolly tho my personal preference is to avoid c section at all costs due to the recovery and I don’t think my 2 year old would be all the happy not being able to be picked up 😢 she’s very clingy atm. It’s all soooo individual but interested to hear everyone’s plans as they develop 😊😊

@HopefulllHolly that was essentially my birth plan last time. I wasn’t actually a candidate for forceps / ventouse because of low platelets and I also requested not to go beyond 40 weeks as I was worried about placenta failure too (their policy was induction at 40 weeks for IVF pregnancies, I believe, in any case). I had a really in depth chat with a specialist birth choices midwife towards the end (maybe 35-36 weeks) and my consultant and we agreed induction didn’t make sense as it increases the risk of instrumental delivery. There is a point during labour where you stop being able to have a decent choice, if needed (between c section and instruments) as baby is too far down and instrumental delivery becomes safer than c section (which scared me and also wasn’t advisable).Initially I wanted to give my body a chance to labour naturally so we booked a “safety net C section” (in lieu of induction) at 40+2 weeks and I was offered sweeps from 38. A late scan showed baby was measuring big, particularly the head, and consultant advised c section earlier so he came out at 39 weeks (at almost 9 lb).

I know everyone’s recovery from c section is different, but mine was very straightforward. I was off painkillers by day 5, walking the dogs as normal by day 10. Out for a coffee and a pram stroll on day 6. I expect it will be harder second time round with a toddler, but I’m planning another one.

@DippyDuck19 @Edf Yeah my hospital (Harrogate) is more relaxed about it to be honest. I had a chat with the registrar at my 20 week appt (obstetrician wasn’t there) and she said I can go past 40 weeks if I want to try and have her naturally when she’s ready but equally they don’t mind doing a caesarean before. Basically I want the excitement of going in to labour, for her to be safe and not bruised and battered, drugs that don’t make us woozy and to give her a chance to come naturally rather than before she’s ready. I’ve also read a few mixed things about recovery from caesarean and it’s so varied - I’d hate not being able to pick her up or move around for ages (plus my house has 3 floors and we use all of them so I’d be challenged 🤣🤣). So many choices! Really interesting how everyone is going to try and go though - appreciate it is one of those things that can’t really be planned unless you go straight for a c-section!

Thanks @Leaf86 that’s really helpful. It’s annoying you can’t just know how it will go 🤣🤣 I guess it’s very much we’ll see with a loose plan and be adaptable. Baby has a bigger head currently too so maybe I’ll have all my choices taken away anyway! Who knows!

I only really started thinking about this as the registrar started asking me about birth choices at 20 weeks and I did say no induction because I’m quite sure on that - but equally I felt like she was asking me to make decisions before anyone had even had a good chat with me about it. My next appointment with the obstetrician in the hospital is when I’m 38 weeks so I want to go in with a fairly good plan that I can’t be pushed around too much on 🤣🤣🤣

@HopefulllHolly ah sorry I didn’t mean you wouldn’t be able to pick baby up as she will be light as a feather- I meant my lump of a 2 year old 😂😂

@HopefulllHolly I've started writing out my birth preferences on an app. Will discuss in more detail on 3rd October when I have my 25 week appointment. I then have another consultant appointment at 28 weeks so feel I need to get midwife to talk through it before I have that appointment so I can ask all the right questions.

I'd like to request not going over 40 weeks as I'd just be anxious and want him out! 38 weeks is New Year's Eve for me. So may be looking at some natural remedies to induce labour.

But I was born over 5 weeks early, same with my siblings. So if I take after my mum, baby could be here before Christmas!!!

Those who have had babies before - Has anyone used aromatherapy / clary sage to bring on labour??