IUI & Fertility in SSC

[solanks]

Hi everyone,

I've struggled to find any groups that are focussed specifically on same sex couples trying to conceive (that do not have any fertility issues).

My partner and I are currently on round three of IUI using donor sperm. The first two tries we did we attempted the natural route (so no medication and no ovulation trigger injection). We decided to go down the medicated route on our third try and are currently in the two week wait, waiting for our results today!

This whole process has been emotionally, physically and financially challenging, so much more than we ever expected, and we would love to hear from other same sex couples on this topic who are in a similar situation to ours. We want to exchange stories, offer each other support, give advice and also recommendations (as there is so much conflicting information out there and each clinic's protocols vary too, which we found bizarre).

Looking forward to hearing your stories; be they successful, unsuccessful, or even if you are completely new to this journey ✨

@Twomumfamily So sorry for the absence and not replying, but please know that we have been thinking of you and your partner and we send you all our love 🩷

@strawberrylaces12 Ah this is just bloody amazing and I am SO beyond happy for you! I can’t imagine how difficult that wait must have been but what a result! Looking forward to hearing more updates in the future, but in the meantime, take it easy and be kind to yourself as your body has been through a lot xxx

@Quickdraw23 The tww is so tough and I hope you are doing ok. Thinking of you also xxx

Hoping everyone else is doing well in their journeys too.

My partner is going to be 27 weeks tomorrow!! Only one more week of the second trimester and then she’ll be into her third. It’s honestly still so surreal and I have to pinch myself every day. And trust me when I say that time FLIES during pregnancy!! We are off for a 4D scan on Sunday, which we’re really excited for (we just hope baby girl plays ball as she bloody hates the Dopplers and being prodded lol! Seems shes not fond of the camera already lol!) We were supposed to go last Sunday but I got admitted to hospital with suspected appendicitis, but I am all ok now and resting at home.

Lots of love to you all ✨

Thank you!! 🥰 yeah we're prioritising our health and mind where possible. Yesterday evening to celebrate we booked a holiday for towards the end of the month, in the UK but still will be lovely to get away for a few nights and relax 😊

Awww how lovely 😍 ooh I hope she behaves for the scan tomorrow. Have you been doing any shopping/getting ready for her arrival? I know some people don't until even closer to the time but I definitely would by now 😂 Blimey I'm sorry to hear about the suspected appendicitis that can't have been nice. But glad that you're home and resting.

Love a staycation - where are you off to? Hope you both have a lovely time 😊

I’ve been organised enough to do a list on excel and we are slowly working our way through it - small bits for now (sleepsuits, towels, etc). We will leave the big and important items (pram, crib, etc) ‘til next month as we are moving this month so figured we’d save ourselves extra work! (And when I say “we” I mean “‘me” lol). We’re also trying not to get carried away (which is easy to do) and not buy things that are not absolutely necessary. Making use of charity shops, Facebook Marketplace and carboot sales where we can ☺️

Hi everyone, it’s so great to hear all your updates and thank you for the kind messages.

been thinking of you and your partner often @Twomumfamily and wishing you both healing and positive things going forward

@strawberrylaces12 what an update! So delighted for you!

@solanks how time flies! So glad everything is going well for you!

its so spooky I was just coming on here to offer an update! We tootled off for our viability scan today and so happy to say the little blob is measuring 7w5d with a good heart rate and it’s sitting in the right place. It even has little nubs where the limbs will be.

i have never felt relief like it! This feels like a long time coming. Our first fertility consultation was i think in February 2023, and I was really ready to give up after this 4th transfer.

I’ve had really mild symptoms, to the point that I was questioning whether they were just in my head (except my boobs which are definitely objectively bigger and sorer than usual!).

the wait between the pregnancy test was the toughest part of IVF for me so far, so glad it’s over! Have now finally referred to maternity services so looking forward to the next chance to see how the blob has grown!

This is such a wonderful update, I'm delighted for you both! That wait until the first scan... oof. But now you're released to normal nhs care, presumably! 12 week scan next!

This is also incredible news. Fingers crossed your next steps go well too - looking forward to seeing news from you in due course

I'm 34 weeks now, so not long to go! Somewhat in denial... 😁

We'll be going to Center Parcs so we can have some chill time but also enjoy activities and meals out etc. 🥰

Aww that all sounds so good! Ooh good luck with the move, how are you feeling about it? 😊

Thank you!!

Oh wow amazing news, so pleased it all went well. I bet that's such a relief. Wow yeah, definitely shows it's worth persevering (as long as it's manageable mentally of course, all about balance). When will your next scan be do you know? 😊

Oh wow amazing! I knew it was early in the year that you got pregnant I just couldn't remember exactly when so thought you would be due soon, not long now!! How have you been getting on with the pregnancy? I know you had a tough time with symptoms in the earlier days, did that ease off more?

And thank you (re your other post), we're really happy with the outcome so far. But we know we've got a bit of a journey ahead of us still but hopefully with a positive outcome 🤞

What a lovely few updates on this thread 😍 I know we have all been on quite the journey and it is so wonderful to see.

@Quickdraw23 Congratulations, so happy for you, that wait must have been so hard but what a relief for you. I hope you and your partner are able to relax a little now and begin to enjoy the pregnancy!

@ProfessorplumBilliardroomCandlestick Oh my gosh that has gone so fast, you are so very close!

@strawberrylaces12 Center Parcs sounds like a well deserved break. All my fingers are crossed for you when you are ready for your transfer.

@solanks Thank you for the well wishes, time is flying I cannot believe your partner is nearly in the third trimester, good luck for your 4D scan, I hope she isn't shy and you get a good look at her.

It's so nice to hear everyone's updates!
@Quickdraw23 I'm so glad your scan went well. Interesting about the fluctuating symptoms, must be quite and odd, but great feeling.

@Twomumfamily I'm glad you and your partner are healing well and have support from the clinic.

@strawberrylaces12 6 embryos is great! I hope you enjoy centre parcs. We've just booked a halfterm holiday (my wife teaches} as we didn't really take a holiday over the summer. Really looking forward to relaxing, exploring and just being together.

@solanks 27 weeks is amazing! I would love to know more about the spreadsheet. That sounds really organised, especially coming up to a move. Moving is so stressful.

@ProfessorplumBilliardroomCandlestick Wow, you're so close. Do you feel prepared?

I've just been for a scan today to check on the endometrium. I'm on quite a lot of oestrogen at the moment. It all looked good, so our transfer is booked in the next few weeks. I'm really excited and also nervous. We signed the paperwork that means we can both legally be the parents today. I'm not sure how that works in the UK, but it was a fairly straightforward form here. If all goes well, we will have our holiday between pregnancy test and first scan.

@rivierliedje Very exciting, wishing you lots of luck for your transfer!!

So we have a little update from me...

A few days after we found out about the missed miscarriage, my Wife asked me if I would try again, and as my cycle was about to start, if I would try again on that cycle. Our doctor agreed, so 3 weeks ago I had a frozen embryo transfer! In hindsight it was a little crazy, but we thought of it as a secret cheeky try and didn't tell anyone, it definitely helped us feel positive about the future during a tricky time, although I didn't have high hopes if I am honest.

But.. a week ago we got a positive pregnancy test!!

On Monday I had an HCG BETA test which came back as 638 (12dp5dt) which is a super positive number (my wifes was 100 at this point), so just hoping it doubles tomorrow.

Obviously, we are absolutely terrified of the same thing happening again, and so we have a private scan booked the week after next at 6+3, before our clinic one at 7+3! Fingers crossed we have a heartbeat, my anxiety is through the roof!

I don't have too many symptoms other than sore boobs (and I am SOOO hungry) so like @Quickdraw23 I do feel like it is all in my head and don't quite believe it just yet. Two weeks and counting!

Thank you to everyone in this thread, it really has been a godsend during this (long) journey!

@Twomumfamily this is amazing! Congratulations. I love the sneaky attempt method to keep stress down.

Don't panic if there's no visible heartbeat on your early scan - it's not always visible until 8 weeks as they're just so tiny. But I will keep everything crossed that you do.

@Twomumfamily that's brilliant news and teally good HCG numbers. Fingers all crossed for you.
Of all the medication i'm finding the oestrogen to 'plump up' the uterine lining is causing the most side effects. I jus can't sleep and am feeling quite sick. And the progesterone jabs I started today are very sore

Wow @Twomumfamily that is fantastic news! So pleased for you and the numbers look so promising! I second what @ProfessorplumBilliardroomCandlestick regarding the early scan. The wait for that is by far the hardest wait so far for me.

i am very chuffed to hear of your update, and likewise, so appreciative of this thread.

i am bobbing along, haven’t had any upping of symptoms really, maybe slightly more nauseous and yes VERY HUNGRY. I am wandering around all the time thinking “well how am I supposed to know if things are going well in there if I can’t see anything or feel anything?” It’s totally bizarre. But am just trying to keep busy.

I heard from my midwife yesterday (via text off a random mobile number! Don’t know what I was expecting). And she explained that she might be working on Saturday and so might be able to do my booking appointment then, because all the rest of her appointments are totally booked up. But she isn’t sure yet and so will let me know, by further text 🙄

it was such an NHS experience - very nice clinician, definitely overworked and totally chaotic way of doing things. I say this as someone who works in the NHS and sees its inner workings. Bracing myself!

Amazing!! Congratulations 🥳 best of luck and will be thinking of you, let us know how the scan goes if you can 😊 xx

Just an update that we did have a sneaky fresh transfer on day 5 (didn't tell anyone) so actually got 7 embryos with 6 in the freezer. Unfortunately today I've started my period and had a very obvious negative test this morning so that's not worked.

I had really hoped it would would work. But I think I knew it was coming... I tested out the trigger and thought I had a couple of very very faint lines on day 4 and day 5 after transfer but they never carried on and I'd been getting some PMS symptoms the last couple of days, so I was sort of prepared. Doesn't make it easier though. We'll now need a review appointment before another transfer so will be at least a couple of months until a FET. But I think I've preferred not telling anyone including family so there's no pressure or asking me for updates during an already stressful two week wait. So think we'd do the same again xx

@Twomumfamily
@strawberrylaces12 sorry to hear that Strawberry. I hope you're clinic is helpful.

I'm finding the progesterone jabs so painful (and i've only done a day and a half) that I emailed the clinic and they've said I can have pessaries instead. So i hope that works. It'll be interesting, because I prescribe the pessaries all the time. Not at the dose prescribed and not usually to be used as pessaries, but interesting to be the patient!

Thank you. I actually messaged them this morning because I started spotting and had a negative test early morning. I asked what I should do if my period fully started and they advised to keep going with the pessaries until official test day (13 days after transfer). I don't mind the pessaries tbh, I've been doing them rectally which I thought I'd hate but I got used to it, it just feels like a waste when I know what the outcome is. But I'll follow their advice just to make sure I've done everything correctly.

So you don't have to do the injections and the pessaries too then? Thankfully I was just on the pessaries, I'm 13 days post egg collection so I think I'm within the normal luteal phase time but I wasn't sure if it's normal to start a period on a dose of 400 twice a day. I know my friend did for her last cycle. Whenever I've had my progesterone tested in the past e.g. with IUIs it's been fine. I wonder if the clinic will suggest any difference with the pessaries or just the same. I guess if my body knows it's not pregnant it will just go ahead and give me my period 😅

400mg twice a day is what my pessaries are as well. Yes, instead of jabs, thankfully!

Sorry to hear this. I can totally understand keeping the two week wait to yourself - we kept everything quiet from family for weeks on end!

@strawberrylaces12 so sorry to hear your transfer didn’t work out this time 😞 hope you’re able to do some nice things together and have some rest and recovery xx

How are you getting on folks? Really hope you’re all doing ok.

I am 9w4d today and have a cold. My symptoms have remained quite mild so far, except for feeling very fatigued!

Im trying hard to keep anxiety under wraps, and not read into anything re symptoms or lack thereof as I know they’re not indicative of anything in particular. My 12 week scan isn’t for another three weeks, and it feels so long to wait. Does anyone have any advice on managing this wait? Did anyone feel worried in the lead up?