IVF / FET March/April 2022 Thread 2

[AliceAbsolum]

Shiny new thread as we filled up the last one.

Apologies all for being so quiet. I’ve just found this week pretty tough, and feel like I’m failing at work after all the ivf appointments and feeling unwell. I’ve been working til 10pm most nights to catch up. Hoping next week I can have a day without crying (totally unlike me) xx

@Hopingforamiracle11 I agree, I find organising and planning for the next transfer keeps me calm. I have a consultation next Tuesday so hopefully will have a plan going forward from there. Have you got a date in the diary yet? How are you finding it otherwise?.
@Daisychain93x thank you that’s really helpful to know. I have my dr appointment in cd11 so at least I now know it will likely be the following cycle. All the best for your baseline scan today. Let us know how you get on x
@Herewegoagain881 how are you feeling lovely? wishing you all the best for today. Xx
@PMAmostofthetime so sorry to hear you’ve been spotting. When I spoke to the nurse she said there are many things that can cause us to bleed, but that the only way to know whether we’re pregnant is with a test. Good luck for today lovely. Re wee capture, I ordered some cheap tests on Amazon and they came with a little set of plastic cups for wee catching- they’ve been amazing and I’d order them again just for them, I imagine you can order them by themselves too. Total game changer for me. X
@Steph2345 so sorry to hear about your a&e visit. OHSS is really horrid and sounds like you’ve been very poorly with it. Hope you’re getting the rest and care you need. Fingers crossed they can come up with some answers for you from their monitoring x
@AliceAbsolum that’s such wonderful news, your line is so beautiful dark. Really happy for you x
@HJen22 how are you doing lovely? Do you have an idea when you’ll start again?

Sorry if I’ve missed anyone, trying to catch up x

@AliceAbsolum I think I'm 14dp5dt, although I've just realised I'm not entirely sure what counts as day 1! My transfer was on Friday 2 weeks ago. My beta numbers have been very low in the past so I'm expecting a low number, I'm just hoping it's not so low it's unviable! Are you having a blood test or waiting for the scan?

@Agapanthus13 absolutely no need to apologise. I'm so sorry you've had a tough week, that is totally understandable. I was the same with work, with the appointment and emotional toll I felt like I did nothing for a lot of days. But do cut yourself some slack, you have went through a lot. Do your work know you've been doing IVF? And I promise there will come days when you don't cry. It doesn't feel like it now; and we all know how that feels. But there will be brighter days x

Great you've got your consultation on Tuesday and can get the ball rolling! Remind me, do you have frosties? @Hopingforamiracle11 how are things with you? Perhaps some of us will be going again at the same time x

I am doing well thank you 💕 Looking to start norethisterone again next cycle with meds starting start of June! And EC 13th June. When I say June it feels ages away but I'm hoping time flies now we've dates x

Morning ladies,

@AliceAbsolum glad I'm not the only one losing random items.

@Steph2345 @HJen22 @Agapanthus13

Thanks for all your support ladies it was a BFN for me this morning on a FRER I'm 9DP5DT so it's definitely all over as I thought.
I'll ring the clinic again later but I fear that they will just tell me to carry on with meds and test Wednesday. I have some cheapy strip tests so I'll see on one of those and ring them if so- seems pointless to continue but hey I'm not a doctor.

@Herewegoagain881 good luck today- hope those numbers are high.

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Really sorry to hear that @PMAmostofthetime Take time to process it and feel how you feel. Lots of self care xx

@AliceAbsolum it's not sunk in yet- I just feel numb- also meant using random items not losing in my last post.
X

Numb is OK too. It'll come when it comes. It's a grief isn't it. A big loss, of hope, of what it could have been.

@PMAmostofthetime I'm so sorry, I hope you can look after yourself this weekend as it will take some time to come to terms with. I agree with you that you should feel hard done by about the skipped steps-I would definitely be raising my concerns about that if I were you.

@Steph2345 you poor thing, I hope you're feeling better today.

@PMAmostofthetime 💔 sorry it hasn't worked for you this time. If it's small consolation, I learnt so much in my first cycle that I found this second one miles easier and more manageable. And I agree that planning the next steps is a great way to channel your energy right now.

AFM, bloods taken this morning, will hear back later today... still a bit meh about my chances, and I'm also planning my schedule around a third go straight away if this one doesn't work out: plan A is that I'll be happily up the duff finally, but plan B is to be back on this rollercoaster late May... let's see...

@Herewegoagain881 I don't know what counts as day 1 either. It's not CD1 with ivf because the transfer day is artificial isn't it. A calender app on Google says I'm 4+2, 11dp5dt. Which is about right isn't it if you taje 5 days before transfer as "ovulation". 16dpo is 14dpo which is the 28 day cycle average, plus 2. Hm. I have no idea if that made any sense.

I'm not going to do bloods, I'll poas tomorrow morning and if it's another strong positive I'll wait for a scan.
Our clinic says no internal scans, which really annoys me and makes me anxious as there is literally no evidence I can find to back that up. DH and I are thinking we just coast for a month and reassess at 8 weeks if we get that far.

@PMAmostofthetime so sorry to hear it, I hope you can get some answers through this! I do wonder if the ovulation induction has shifted your cycle, but like you, I'm definitely not a doctor!! It just seems likely. And definitely look into having an endo examination. There is such a thing as silent endometriosis that doesn't show up on ultrasounds. I don't know what the process is for actually getting the doctor to order tests, but since people do get diagnosed with it all the time surely it is not impossible? Especially if you do have indicators of something like that going on.
I completely understand both the numb feeling and any potential sadness or disappointment, as much as we try to prepare ourselves for it not working, we obviously would not be going through all this if we didn't want it to, and hope that it did. We'll be here as you work out next steps!

@Agapanthus13 absolutely do whatever you need to do, I have to step away from thinking about fertility treatments sometimes too, particularly when work is stressful... that's why I can never remember who is doing what part of the treatment on what day! I also feel like I am failing at work right now, I have so many big career things happening right on top of this FET and I've had to say no to some things that I really should have said yes to, but I just... can't handle any more right now. I'm at my limit. And it's so weird because it's not like a frozen cycle is technically all that taxing, I just take pills a few times a day (and work hard to remember!!) and wait for my scan, and yet, it really just takes up so much physical/mental effort somehow, to be on this journey. I'm trying to just give myself grace, but it's easier said than done.

It's also not easier that I've chosen to keep this completely to myself, I just know that as much as I would like the support of family/friends, the pressure I put on myself for this to work is big enough as it is, I absolutely would not be able to stand people in my life who don't know anything about this fertility business to be waiting for updates and wondering if this is the time it'll work... and my feeling that this wouldn't be right for me was kind of confirmed in a dream I had last night where I told my whole family I was having an IVF transfer and instantly regretted it haha! I was so relieved when I woke up and I hadn't actually done it. We all cope differently - but it's nice for my subconscious to confirm that I'm doing what's best for me (under the circumstances).

@SamTTC @Agapanthus13 I'm the same with work! Finding it really hard to focus at the moment. There's only so many things we can have going on at the one time I suppose.

I had my first scan. Only 11 follicles which I'm a bit disappointed with as the consultant said we should get 10-15 eggs so obviously that won't be happening. Oh well.

@PMAmostofthetime I'm really sorry about the result today... sending you lots of hugs and I hope you are ok.. It sounds like you have learnt so much from this cycle and hopefully all the information learnt will go towards a successful cycle next time. I'm also hoping they may give you a really good thorough second round as there have clearly been some things to complain to them about.

I can't remember if I shared what I did in the cycle that worked for me last time, but it was: a medicated FET cycle, with: estrogen, lots of progesterone, blood thinners, steroids, and interlipid infusions (which I don't know if it helped, but I threw everything at it), and a genetically tested day 5 blast.

@Agapanthus13 gosh yes it's so hard, so much hope is pinned on this process and the loss will take time to recover from.. Allow yourself to feel all the feelings for as long as you need.

I'm just on my way home from my blood test, I was warned that the labs aren't doing so great at getting results back on the day at the moment so I may have to wait... Although hopefully not as I did the test early. It's going to be a long day.

@LuckyNovember best of luck for today!

@AliceAbsolum I've just looked at an IVF calculator site and yep it says I'm 4+5 which makes sense as our transfers were 3 days apart. It sounds like your clinic is being very cautious by saying no internal scans although I do remember my one making sure the scan was very quick so there probably is some risk involved 🤷🏻‍♀️ but I can imagine the wait to week 8 will be really tough esp as you transferred 2!

@Hopingforamiracle11
Protocol wise, for a FET I started of Estrofem for about 10 days, had 2 scans, on the 2nd one they said lining looked good and booked transfer for 4 days later. That night I had an Hcg injection, started progesterone, antibiotics, and steroids. They wanted me on aspirin throughout but I refused.
On the day of the transfer I had an intralipid infusion 2 hours before the transfer (but really dubious on that!). That night I started injections of progesterone and stopped taking the antibiotics, they also added blood thinners.
I stop the steroids tomorrow, then gradually come off the other meds at 10 weeks, 12 weeks, 20 weeks ish.
I had to lie down for 2 hours with my bum up post transfer, when I lifted my head up the nurse told me off!
Oh and they also shoved something up my arse after transfer, literally no idea what that was

The clinic say post transfer no showers for 3 days. No sex until 12 weeks. No herbal tea, no reaching, lifting, or exercise. No yoga. And no internal scans.

I've done a tonne of research into clinics and have had good and bad experiences so feel free to ask me anything.

@Somatronic How long will you stim for? Could you grow more follies in theory?

@SamTTC I think there is a real benefit to not telling people. Especially not broadcasting it on the internet! Its lovely on the one hand that people are supportive, but a lot of people don't know what to say and that can be a significant stress to an already stressful process.

@LuckyNovember hope they don't make you wait too long for the results- your plans made me chuckle- hoping it works out for you and you'll 'be happily up the duff' 😂

@Somatronic I have 10 days off after today and my plan is to get back in shape and feel better about me. I had to buy bigger knickers last week! The biggest I have even had in my life! Wasn't a good day but I feel worse about it now and exercise and healthy eating will prepare me for the next cycle. ( I will of course eat an Easter egg) I'm still offy favourite caffeinated soft drink and drinking more water and I'll keep it that way.

I've confirmed with gynaecology that I want the appointment with them and will discuss private options about Endo and the clinic should give me an appointment first week of May.

We have cancelled our long haul holiday in September because quite frankly a the money is much better spent on a 3rd cycle. So we are going to plan a shorter closer trip abroad with the deposit money that we can only transfer and not have returned so that will be nice and it makes me feel better that we have a plan ( this holiday was booked nearly 4 years ago now and kept being changed due to the pandemic)

@SamTTC thank you, I also feel the same about work. I have to be on the ball in my job 1 slip could have major consequences -My bosses know 1 male 1 female and ones been through IVF the other IUI so I'm lucky they understand but there's worked one first time- one the time they decided it was their last go. I met the little baby this week which was hard but also lovely to see it can work.

@SamTTC @Agapanthus13

I'm sooo behind with stuff in work and not up to my usual scratch that I'm panicking a bit so after this time off which they are making take all my stuff to them work phone, laptop etc I need to get back on top of things.
As they can only give me so much leeway before I would need to be off.

Aside from my bosses no one else knows you them, me and OH and of course you guys who keep me sane and keep me having hope.

I think the progesterone and the build up of hormones from stims make us tearful and tired and out brains are just not as sharp. Be kind to yourself. I hope you can have some time off and look after yourself.

@LuckyNovember Thank you- thinking about it, I think it will be easier as I will know what to expect and when to be kinder to myself and not have as much on. The 2WW and EC-ET will still be hell but I won't be so naive about it all next time.

@Nutrinerd hope your ok today?

@Steph2345 how are you feeling?

@AliceAbsolum will be eagerly awaiting your morning up date on 2nd test tomorrow and of course I have a reminder on for 3pm Sunday.

@Soleste some distraction techniques- make plans with people who don't know your doing IVF or if they do know ban them for speaking about it. Go to the cinema, out for lunch. Binge watch Netflix, learn a new craft.

Make plans for the second week this week.

Cramps, sore boobs, spots, crying, being tired, headaches and back ache are all normal, excessive swelling and pain not managed with paracetamol is not-
Drink 3 litres of water a day and eat protein and understand sometimes it is just going to drag. It's ok to get fed up, frustrated and wish you didn't have to go through this.

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Should have just uploaded the protocol, would have been quicker. Pic attached

@Nutrinerd You doing ok?

Sorry my posts crossed over with a few

@Herewegoagain881 Thank you- I really hope you do get results today- always waiting aren't we?

@Somatronic they may be more that they missed- but 11 follicles is really good news- remember it's quality over quantity if you get too many your at risk of OHSS.

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@AliceAbsolum they shoved something up your arse after transfer hahaha. You have a way with words. I asked if any more follicles will grow and she said there were two tiny ones that theoretically could, but she didn't seem to think they would. I was told AMH was 18, now they're saying it's 16 so 11 follicles seems a bit low to me. I think I'm on a pretty low dose of meds, 150 menopur - I've seen others on 300 or 400 but I presume they kept it low because I have PCOS.

@PMAmostofthetime I hear ya on the holiday stuff. We had 2 different honeymoons booked and cancelled due to Covid. I haven't even bothered rebooking anything because I don't want to have to cancel etc because of IVF. We'll see how this cycle goes. We're paying for all our cycles so I probably can't afford it anyway.

@PMAmostofthetime I'm really sorry for the negative test today 😞 I hope you are doing ok. And if not, that's ok. I'm glad you've some days off! And you have the same mindset as me (I've had to buy bigger jeans, I bought bigger pants ages ago too haha) in trying to get healthy physically as well as mentally.

Sorry you've had to cancel your holiday but glad you're still going to get away for some time. I really want an abroad holiday this year and my OH turns 40 in sept but as usual; who knows what will be happening then!

Have cancelled my week off next week; I'm still testing negative but it would take a miracle for my OH to get negative tests this weekend and able to go down to get his daughter. I'll maybe still take a day or two and hopefully we can have her up for her May holidays. Although that's slap bang when we start our second cycle; of course 🙄 as well as a wedding haha.

@SamTTC absolutely, do what's right for you! After telling people first round and having to update that it hadn't worked; we aren't telling anyone when we are starting or doing the second round. It was nice to have the emotional support but it was particularly awful having to tell my Mum and Sister; seeing them cry for me was the worst. Next time I have news I want it to be happy. We're being more open in general in that we're going through IVF but I'm not going into any detail anymore at all.

It's great to have you guys and if anyone doesn't yet speak with their clinic counsellor I couldn't recommend it enough! I've spoken to mine since September and I cannot speak highly enough of her; she's amazing x

Sorry for delay - organising appointments and more meds! I’m mostly relieved that I’m not mad and that the nausea and fatigue over the last few days have an identifiable cause!

Fantastic news! Congratulations @Nutrinerd I'm so happy for you! 🥳🎉

@Somatronic my egg collection was ages ago now (6 years!) but I do remember being pleasantly surprised with the number of eggs collected Vs the number of follicles they counted. I think they got 18 (11 mature) and fairly sure they counted a lot less follicles than that. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you that this is also the case for you!

@Nutrinerd Yayyyyy!! Whoop whoop. Lovely lines :D Well done for holding out! How do you feel?

Amaaazing @Nutrinerd this is wonderful news. How exciting!

@AliceAbsolum they literally had me up and about 5-10 minutes after transfer! It's amazing how different each clinic is. I had to shove a painkiller suppository up my bum 2 hours before and 6 hours after transfer, maybe it was that?! The things we have to do 😄