Weight loss for IVF 2021/2022

[WeightlossKin]

I need to lose three stone to qualify for IVF. I've got one to lose for my referral and two more after that for treatment.
Creating this for myself and for others who might want to buddy up!

Definitely, we’re all here for each other no matter what we’re going through as life always does get in the way and impact losing weight.

I haven’t heard of body coach, will have a Google! Yeah I find if I start giving into something sugary it’s a slippery slope and hard to get out of it. I was so frustrated the first time round I completely gave up chocolate - still don’t know how I did it as I love chocolate 😂.

Ah you make your own?! Yeah it’s definitely better than bread ☺️

Oh bless you, good on you for going though do they know that you’re struggling at all? Oh it’s just so frustrating I know it’s not healthy but the thought goes through my mind a lot like how is it so easy for someone else but so difficult for us and once we want to get pregnant I notice pregnant people everywhere. It is so hard, we’re all here for you and completely understand. My family are south Asian so any gathering it’s like oh when you going to have kids you’ve been married two years now and I just don’t have the energy to explain we’re trying and it’s not happened yet. It bugs me so much when people ask! One of my close friends is due any day and she asked me to go to her baby shower last year but I just couldn’t do it the thought of sitting there and having to listen to everyone’s excitement was too heartbreaking - it put a bit of a strain on our friendship though.

Families can be hard to deal with when they ask those types of questions. I also hate bumping into friends of the family when I go back to my parents to visit - middle of a bloody supermarket and they're asking tonnes of questions about why haven't I had a kid despite being married for 4 years now. So awkward.

Thankfully they do and two of my mates (one expecting, one had a baby via ivf last July) are amazing and they don't talk anything baby related unless I instigate it and if they see me getting upset they check on me and change the topic. The other friend is oblivious (not in a malicious way, she has no understanding of social cues at all in general 😂) and makes the odd comment that hurt, but I know she doesn't mean it in a cruel way. I'm hoping they'll bring their kids, purely because I love kids so much it distracts me and I just ignore the adults 😂 I just play with the kids and enjoy it while I can. I will admit I'm finding this baby shower harder to deal with because it was an unplanned pregnancy, but my friend has been amazing. When she broke the news to me, she was so worried about how I'd feel that she was crying because she knew I'd be jealous and she wished it was me and not her. Since then, her and her fiancé have been really sensitive to me because they know how hard I'm finding it all. If only everyone could be as nice as they've been.

I might switch it hinges up and do slimming world, it worked for me a few years ago and I feel like I need a change at the moment. Might find a weekend group to go to, the sitting down and talking about the weeks progress or lack there of might encourage me to focus more. I need to do something, not sure what's going on with my weight these last two weeks because it should be going down but it doesn't appear to be 😒 we shall see!

Hope everyone has a great day ❤️

@Lakyta1717 it’s just so unnecessary isn’t it? And 9 times out of 10 it’s because they just want a bit of gossip rather than genuine interest well from my point of view anyway. I had a relatives birthday last weekend and I got asked by four different people before my mum turned up and basically told them to shut up 😅 I just don’t have the energy to explain as if I say it’s because I need to lose weight to get IVF I get all the advice I didn’t ask for and judgement.

Oh im so glad they’re understanding, makes a huge difference doesn’t it? It’s good to know you have people in person to speak to as well. They sound really supportive. 🤞 fingers crossed there will be kids there to keep you occupied!

That sounds good, sometimes having to speak about it can push you more and you never know they may have suggestions too that you haven’t tried or thought of! I’m kinda stuck at the moment I’m hovering at my weight give or take a kg but I haven’t exercised and I’ve had bad flu which feels like such an excuse. Just need to get back into it!

Hope you all have a good day too ☺️

Thanks both, I really appreciate the support ❤️

My favourite diet so far has been calorie counting 😂 so much bloody easier. However, also gives you opportunity to eat lots of unhealthy things and just squeeze out healthy calories to make room for them. So needs the right mindset. Weight watchers was my least favourite. Slimming world is better IMO but I have started doing online only. I was going to group but actually found it stressful and harmful as I could only weigh at the end of the day and found it so upsetting listening to people who had been drinking and eating loads of more and worse than me (or so they said!) And lost twice as much. It's just better for me to weigh at home! Although the online community with weight watchers was much much better.

Families asking questions can F right off 🤦do they think asking is going to make you go 'oh I'd never thought about that, I'll get straight on it??
It is lovely when people are more understanding and sympathetic. Not sure I could deal with anyone having an accidental pregnancy around me 😳
Baby showers are also the worst 😭 ugh. Wish it wasn't so hard to deal with.
My weight has been stagnant too! I think it's the winter holiday period. Looking forward to us all making some more great progress! Full steam ahead 💪

I've just ovulated so I'm feeling bloaty 🙁 hoping that doesn't touch the scales and they do a huge drop on Sunday 🤞

Salad for lunch and soup for dinner. Very unhealthy cereal bar for breakfast but that's what getting out of bed late will do to you!! Hope you're both having good days!

Morning lovelies!
Hooray Friday 😊 I didn't sleep well at all so my plan today is just to not snack on chocolate! Being tired always makes me want to snack on all the sugar and the carbs. I've tried too hard this week to derail myself now. Hope you all have positive days!

Morning ladies!
I had a crazy busy day yesterday between work and going to see a school in potentially applying for a job at.
Absolutely shattered today and got my mates baby shower. Am excited to catch up with my friends, but dreading baby stuff. Just going to remind myself that I'm closer to ivf than I've ever been.
I've had a good week good wise, so hoping I've managed to lose weight tomorrow! I've also done more exercise than I normally would, which kept me sane this week! It's been manic but I've felt really good just getting on my exercise bike or doing some yoga/stretching. The bonus of doing the tour yesterday, was I got a really nice walk in because of where the school is.
Hope everyone has a fab weekend ❤️

Ooh exciting to be applying for a new job! Hope you get it if you do 🤞

I really hope the baby shower goes okay. You're so much stronger than me. I'll be falling to pieces when I go to SILs baby shower. You are going to get to IVF! Will you be ok do you think? My worry would be comfort eating afterwards 🤦
Well done having a really good week! Let us know how you do when you weigh in. You deserve a good loss!

I've been doing loads of walking and exercise most mornings and evenings and have had salad I think everyday for lunch this week 😂. 🤞 I weigh tomorrow too. I want a 2lb loss 😬😬 dreading it.

Hopefully I'll be okay. If I come back and feel a bit emotional, I'm going to jump on my exercise bike and vent that way by sweating it out 😂
We definitely deserve a loss! Will let you know how I get on tomorrow. I'm wearing a new dress today which is a size smaller, so that's giving me a boost right now. Gotta take the wins when we get them!

Definitely exercise it out!! I guess if we use these painful things as an additional boost some good comes from the experience.

That's really lovely you're in a smaller size! Shows you you've made so much progress so far.

Hey both ☺️

@Lakyta1717 good luck on the job and really hope the baby shower went okay yesterday! Sounds like you’ve had some good days getting exercise in ☺️

@WeightlossKin well done for all the exercise too! Hope the weigh in goes well today

Sorry I’ve been absent, I’ve been really unwell so haven’t been online much. I’m going to get my head down from tomorrow plan my meals again and get back onto low carb and low sugar and try my best to reintroduce exercise! Even if it’s yoga at home it’s a start ☺️

Hope you’re both having a good weekend!

Hi both.

A stagnant weigh in for me today. So have decided I'm going to go low carb and up my fruit/veg intake. A bit gutted to have not lost anything again, but just going to adjust and see how it goes.
I'm also going to do some more exercise - think I might try some exercise classes this week, see what's on locally and give some a go. I think I need the pressure of paying for it and being in a group so I can't just take it easy 😂 peer pressure has its benefits at times!

Hope you're feeling better @Hjklasdfg taking time out to get better and rest up is important.

The baby shower was mostly lovely but was hard when they mentioned having to put things in storage for a second kid because after our friend has her daughter, no one else is pregnant. I took it as dig at me for not being able to get pregnant. Which I know it wasn't, but I was in my own head about it all. So I did have a few moments where I was really quiet because I was trying not to cry 🤦🏼‍♀️ but it wasn't too bad overall. I got baby cuddles which I loved, so that helped! And I didn't come home and eat when I was feeling a bit down, so that's good! I'm glad I don't know anyone else who's pregnant, I don't think I could cope with anymore at the moment.
I'm feeling so much pressure to lose the weight asap, I'm panicking about being 31 and then having to go on a waiting list for ivf and then why if it doesn't work and I get too old and can't have a kid and it's all been because I've not lost weight?! It's so hard not to spiral and catastrophise it all. I just wish I was one of those people who could just knuckle down and get it done. But I'm not - I love food and I hate restriction, I don't enjoy exercise and have to really psyche myself up to it all. I just feel so much pressure, and I get angry because I'm not doing it all quick enough. I wish I could just wake up and it'd all be okay and I've lost the weight 🙄 why can't life be nice like that?! 😂
Sorry for the emotional rant, just feeling it today...

@Hjklasdfg sorry to hear you've been poorly! At the end of the day your body needs to be well to efficiently lose weight. Hopefully you're feeling better now and ready to have a good week ahead! Even little bits of exercise is so good for your mental health and how you feel. have you heard of snackercising? It's called something ridiculous like that anyway but the idea is you just do two sets of exercises and you use a trigger to link it to? E.g. I always do 20 squats during/after brushing my teeth morning and evening and I do some calm deep breathing (instead of rushing around) whenever I wait for the kettle to boil. So in future whenever I brush my teeth I'll feel compelled to do squats in theory. Apparently a good way to develop exercise habits and build it into your day by linking them to activities you do every day.

@Lakyta1717 well done surviving the baby shower and acknowledging your sadness at the times you needed to ❤️ I'm sure they didn't mean to make you feel that way about the stuff in storage but I'd have felt the same.
I absolutely know that downward pressure spiral (more of a tornado really?). I'm sure we all do. It's awful. I think you just have to shake it off and snap out of it when you're ready.

I'm sorry you've had a stay the same today. It's very disheartening isn't it? Try to stay consistent this week and hopefully you can get a bigger loss next week 💪 I often think weight is a week behind your effort.

This is my plan as well as I'm disappointed to have lost 1lb (meaning i've lost 6lbs across 9 weeks which is frustrating and puts me several weeks behind where I'd hoped to be). however all I can do is press on! I try to remind myself constantly that weight loss is only 10% of the equation and the rest is what I'm eating - how much and the type of foods. So don't beat yourselves up if you cba to do the exercise sometimes.

@WeightlossKin 1lb loss is still a loss! And another step closer to your target! Well done!

I'm definitely going to allow myself to feel a bit down today, just feel what I'm feeling and then move forward. Not going to binge or emotionally eat, just have a day of thinking and feeling what I need to.

I know I can lose the weight, I just need to keep going and make the right choices. I don't want to go backwards, so I'll take a stay the same as at least I'm still closer than I was.

I love the sound of doing squats and breathing when you brush your teeth/wait for the kettle. Those simple things can make such a difference and like you said, create good habits. I might have to give that a go!

@Lakyta1717 well done for getting through yesterday, you have a lot more strength than you believe. It’s so hard not to take things personally even if it wasn’t meant to be a comment to you. At least you didn’t comfort eat you must take some pride in that. I’m feeling pretty low too, briefly spoke to my mum about it and all the emotion just came tumbling out and it was a very I feel sorry for myself conversation. I was debating whether to comment or not as I know sometimes when we highlight the bad it can bring others down but this chat is for speaking openly and it includes our bad days. Don’t apologise for ranting or expressing your feelings, sometimes you do just need to get it out. I’m 30 and I’m feeling very similar thoughts at the moment and it’s so hard to stop the spiral. But also try remember you’re so much further than you were at the start of the journey and you can and will get there 💗

@WeightlossKin thank you, I’m feeling a bit better - I have a ton of chronic health conditions so whenever I get a cold or flu I have the aftermath of the other conditions flaring up and it takes a long time to get back to ‘normal’ plus I’ve been on my period and we all know that doesn’t help either. But I rarely talk about my health as I always worry it sounds like I’m complaining etc.
Haven’t heard of snackercising but does sound interesting and manageable. Will try add some into my day! I can be a creature of habit so if I get used to something it usually becomes easier, thank you for mentioning it. We’re all going to be trying it now!

Hope you both have a good day and you’re kind to yourselves

@Lakyta1717 well done for wanting to deal with your feelings and not eating them instead! So hard to do. I hope you managed okay. We're in such a difficult position and there's no magic overnight cure and we've only got control over our actions and annoyingly can't control the results! I honestly believe you'll see good results next week if you have another good week 💪

@Hjklasdfg it's so important to come and express the bad too! Every feeling is valid. We're going to have shit days where everything is overwhelming and we feel sorry for ourselves. If we didn't have those days we wouldn't need a group like this to keep us going!
We're always made to feel bad for feeling sorry for ourselves. I don't think it ultimately gets us any further in the process, but it's a perfectly valid and reasonable way to feel under the circumstances!
Feel free to have a whinge about your health conditions if you want to, if it would help. I know how hard it is to keep on track whilst being ill, and then to have additional conditions ontop exacerbating everything?! That's got to be so tricky!

Let me know how you both get on if you try the snackercising 😊 every extra step we can take is a good one and all that. I'm 31 almost 32.

Can't believe Monday isn't far away - what does everyone do meal plan wise? We tend to plan on a Friday/Saturday for the whole week so we always know what's for dinner!

@Hjklasdfg I totally agree with @WeightlossKin we're mad to feel bad if we have a whinge, or wallow. But it helps to talk about things. We made this group for a reason and if talking to us helps, that's what we're here to do. So feel free to rant and rave away.

I found it helpful to say how I was feeling on here, because when I talk to my husband too much about how I'm feeling, he feel responsible for me being upset. And I hate him feeling like that, so it's nice to have somewhere else to talk about it all. Yes we have make factor, but he blames himself too easily when it's both our responsibility now I've got to lose weight.

I plan on a Sunday, so I'll sit down with my other half and plan our week and then do a shop on the same day. I try to meal prep for a few days at a time to take the pressure off when I'm working. When I get home from school, I'm generally a lazy sod and can't be bothered to cook so it helps just having food to warm up.

I can't believe it's nearly the end of the weekend, it's bloody flown by!

@Lakyta1717 ranting is good for the soul is what I always say!
My husband is similar - feels terrible and responsible for my upset and pain. He's equally pissed off about how my body isn't doing what we want it to 😂. But what can he do about it? All they can do is not eat takeaways in front of us and not wave chocolate about!
We do the same thing! Although I'm terrible at pre prepping anything. Doing well at preparing lunches though and dinners I just have to suffer through making when I get in!
I hate Mondays. They feel the hardest to get through without any comfort food.

Mondays are so hard! I'm exhausted after work today. Thankfully my husband isn't working today, so he's making dinner bless him.
Also, I prepped a salad for lunch, was so hungry! Couldn't wait to eat it! Opened it and dropped it all over the staff room floor 😩😭😂 was hilarious, but I was so sad! So am bloody starving now!

Aww lovely that your husband made dinner 🥰 what a star! I'm so sorry you dropped your lunch 😂 I don't think I'd have laughed though, it would have tipped me over the edge into an emotional breakdown. Food is now sacred and what I am allowed to eat can't end up on the floor!! Hopefully your dinner was amazing and made up for it.
I'm actually not feeling very well today 🤢 the problem with that (other than being utterly rubbish) is that my go-to when sick is to eat wotsits and to generally graze on crappy things because I'm poorly and not eating any set meals so what will biscuits for lunch matter if that's all I can stomach? But it does matter! So I'm going to try and power through and graze on healthy things instead.

Hey both 😊

Sorry I haven’t replied much, I had a day off my phone as much as possible to try get my mind in a better place. I start online CBT tomorrow so hoping that will help too. Thank you both of you though for your kind words, you’re definitely right we need to talk about our good and bad days!

So I started doing squats when brushing teeth and it’s become a habit already so trying to keep that up, started yoga yesterday but my god I ache today! Trying to be more conscious about food though.

@WeightlossKin meal planning wise we used to plan on the weekend for the week ahead with one day blank in case we change our minds in the week or if we eat out etc but since Christmas it’s all gone out the window! What works best for you?
Hope you feel better soon and if it’s all you can stomach it’s better to have something than nothing! Gotta look after yourself! 😊

@Lakyta1717 the weekend always goes too quick! I’m so sad you dropped your lunch!! Hope you had something in replacement and hope you had a better day today 😊

@WeightlossKin hope you're feeling better soon. Don't be too hard on yourself when your not well, a little bit of something is better than nothing!
@Hjklasdfg I really CBT goes well, I know a lot of people who've benefitted from it. A day off your phone is a good thing every now and again. I'm a sucker for mindlessly scrolling through social media. I want to cut back, so might do some away from phone days too.
We ended up with spaghetti bolognaise which was packed with veg, so all good in the end. Didn't spill my lunch today either which is great 😂

@Lakyta1717 thank you 😊 I’ve had two courses of CBT in the past but the fertility stuff was really getting me down so I thought it’s probably best to actually seek some professional help and see if any of their suggestions help.

Oh I always scroll endlessly and then I’m like why did I just do that for half hour 😂 end up watching a zillion animal videos, it is addicting. Yeah I’m trying to be mindful of how much time I spend online too as sometimes it’s social media that’s getting to me - again I’m pleased for everyone who is pregnant around me but at the same time it’s so hard as well.

Ah gotta love spag bog! Haha good to hear you didn’t spill your lunch today 🤣

A day off your phone and CBT all sounds very good for your mental health. Goodluck with online CBT today. Let us know how it goes!
Well done on the yoga and squats 💪 sounds like you're doing really well.

We meal plan for everyday and then shop for the whole week, and if we have a meal out it is planned in advance so all of the other meals can be super healthy to compensate. It's a total lack of ability to be spontaneous. I like the idea of leaving one day open for change but would still need to plan a meal and then just freeze the ingredients as necessary if we changed our minds. I definitely can't do that right now though, I'd either over eat once a week or I'd not eat all day in fear of whatever we end up having for dinner and that's not a great way to feel about food!

It's so easy to lose hours of the day on social media and Mumsnet! I've found since TTC for so long I really struggle to focus on hobbies. When we're not TTC anymore I honestly don't know what my brain will do all day.

@WeightlossKin thank you, it went okay just things I knew already and need to break some bad thought cycles but definitely easier than done. She said to try speak to the GP about my mood and see if they can give anything but I don’t know about medication and ttc so will need to see what they say. I already had an appointment booked in for next week as the low mood is really getting to me and I know even if I was eligible for IVF right now I’m not in the right mental space so definitely need to get my mental health better before my next fertility review. Thank you! I had a day off the yoga yesterday but plan to do some today and I managed to do the squats again yesterday, I might increase by 1 or 2 every week and see how I go.

Ah that sounds good, ah I’d rather be organised than spontaneous with food - I feel if we haven’t really planned we get more likely to order takeaway even though there’s plenty in the kitchen. We’ve planned a few days and I think we’re gonna take it a few days at a time but husband is suppose to start a new job next week (if he does - that’s another long story) and when he’s in a better routine we both tend to be better with food. Sounds good planning when you’re eating out so you can have a healthier take on the rest of the week! I’m struggling giving up the sugars this time round I reach for biscuits and chocolate way too easily, last may when I began the weight loss journey I went cold Turkey and didn’t touch chocolate for a good 4 months - don’t know how I did it if I’m honest!!

We’ll probably finally be able to relax haha but I get what you mean about hobbies - it’s so consuming trying to conceive as there’s always so much to consider. I find it really hard to organise a day out or try go somewhere which would’ve been a breeze before. We just have to put one step in front of another and go from there ☺️
I hate being asked what my hobbies are though as I don’t feel like I have any right now 🤦🏽‍♀️

Hope you have a good day!

How often will your CBT be? Weekly?
Our mental health is so important especially when facing IVF. Maybe your GP can suggest something safe for if you were pregnant? You could always plan to come off it gradually just before IVF if needed? I'm sure there's a way. Especially if you feel you need it.
I agree that we're much more likely to get takeaways if we don't plan 😊
I might have made this up but I'm sure I read that the second time you try to give up anything your body is addicted to (I.e. Sugar!) It's more than twice as hard.

Omg I'd love to be able to properly relax 😂 what's that like?
I'm the same when people ask what my hobbies are or what I'm up to as who can be bothered? That's probably a sign of being a bit depressed by it all actually 😬