ERA/ALICE/EMMA testing thread 2

[seven201]

Link to the old thread
https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/infertility/4187520-era-testing-after-multiple-implantation-failures-anyone-had-it-done?msgid=110302437&utmsource=mentions&utmmmedium=email&utmcampaign=2020-10-19&utmmterm=You+have+been+mentioned+in+a+post&rei=438192#110302437

Welcome to the new thread. Anyone welcome.

Sorry posted too soon. Hope you are all sorted now. It's really frustrating to have gone through the ERA and then have your tweaks thrown off by them running late. Make sure you rest up after. I still can't work out if I started my progesterone on the right day and am leaning towards thinking I did start a day late so perhaps it is not an exact science. X

Really sorry to hear that 🙁 all I can say is that sometimes out of the worst circumstances come the best circumstances. I've had lots of text book transfers of perfect looking embryos fail, it doesn't mean you won't have success with this one and we are all rooting for you.

I’m so sorry it was stressful @Gardenlady543 I did ask my clinic what the leeway was for ERA and they said it’s around 3 hours in and around transfer time so hopefully it’ll be ok.

I hope you can salvage the evening now. Get home to bed with something good to eat and try watch something nice

That's @Dochas121 and @whatcangowrong I guess I just need to forget about it now. What a stressful experience!

@Gardenlady543 definitely try get the stress levels down. Have it put aside and you can always put a complaint into the clinic at some stage but for now get yourself into bed in something cosy and have some chocolate or something nice x

Thankyou @Dochas121 I'm under my faux fur heated blanket, I've had a glass of beetroot juice and pomegranate juice. Hope I can join your guys and get a positive.

I'm sorry your transfer was delayed @Gardenlady543 but good that it was within the recommended time frame. I'm sad that you were crying while waiting ❤️ I think my clinic are similar in the sense of not really fully believing in the the era timing. It adds another layer of stress. But you're pupo 🙂 and hopefully staying that way 🙏 hope you get lots of rest this evening.

Hope everyone is doing OK. I'm getting a lot of symptoms now, feel like my body and mind are playing tricks on me. Monday is coming round quickly. I just want to run away x

@Gardenlady543 well done for getting through it and being pupo. I think I've said before but I had an awful transfer when my bp was far too high and nurses and doctors kept coming in to tel me to calm down or my embryo would be re-frozen, like that was a totally fine thing to do and I was making a fuss about nothing. It was a truly awful day so you have my sympathy. Try and put that all in the past and focus on the embryo getting snuggly.

@Gardenlady543 I'm sorry it's been such a stress but it sounds like they did make the window. That's the important thing. Now you just need to rest up tonight and be nice to yourself. You've got some busy work days to take your mind off it.

Xxx

@VenusStarr I know the feeling of wanting to run away. We're playing for crazily high stakes here and it is terrifying. We are the bravest most determined women I know. If there's ever any kind of fight, I'd want to be on our side. You're doing great. Just keep going and getting through the days. Sending lots of love xxx

Thank you @Janefx40 that made me cry ❤️ lovely to know you are all here supporting me and we're supporting each other xxx

@VenusStarr it's nice you have symptoms now. Try and embrace them. Monday is on its way now.

@Gardenlady543 I’m sorry it was so stressful. Ur stress before it won’t have contributed to anything except making it a horrible few hours. Put it behind u and keeping all crossed that all is ok

@seven201 did u get hcg back? How r u?

@whatcangowrong and @Dochas121 congrats on the bfp. Wonderful news and hoping all stays well.

@VenusStarr I’m really hopeful for u. Epau can’t have made up positive findings like a hb and pole but it’s easy to miss them. So I’m going with they were there. It’s honestly it’s a terrible time and it wasn’t long ago I was going through v similar-the days r long and the tears are many. Just stay strong and keep hoping now is ur time

I’m going to stay on this thread a little longer if u all don’t mind as I really want to see some more happy news esp from the girls who started this thread off at start xx

Hi @Cream123 . Yep, got it back and was only 3, but I'd already been bleeding by then so it wasn't a surprise. Not doing very well. I'm feeling very angry at everything. My husband is crap at emotions and talking and I was mean to him earlier as he thinks I should be fine.

That's nice that you want to stick around. We love having you!

Yes @Cream123 definitely stay, you were the one that told me and @seven201 to get surgery and we've at least moved forward as a result!

@seven201 I'm sorry, it's ok to feel crap, your DH shouldn't be pushing you to be fine, I would be devastated. I hope that this is evidence that you can get pregnant and that success is just around the corner.

@VenusStarr sending you hugs and hoping the time flies to Monday!

I have just has bad news, the amazing vaginal probiotics I was getting from the USA are no longer going to ship internationally. Their international packages keep getting lost in the post, I ordered my first package it arrived fine, I ordered a second package it ended up in Australia! And they sent out a replacement (at a big cost to them) and that one got lost too, I realised it was no longer moving on the tracking so submitting a missing package request and it now appears to be in the UK, yay! But I'm upset I won't be able to get anymore.

@seven201 :( I’m sorry. How utterly rubbish. It’s really no better saying “least u got preg” - I know…. It’s just too much of a rollercoaster of the bfp the drama getting hcgs the waiting …..the hoping and the let down :(

Be pissed off sad and cross. Sending u a hug

lower obv did do something postive to ur uterus. Maybe this was a chromosomally abnormal Embryo never destined to be? We won’t ever know….do u think u can get a frozen done this year or next?

Lots of hugs x

@Gardenlady543 oh that is annoying!

@Cream123 thank you. I don't have a consultation with my ivf dr until 10th Dec and my clinic always has a backlog so I reckon it will be feb or March. I am hoping that it was just a 'bad' embryo.

Ugh @seven201 sorry things are tough. My DP is useless at emotions too. I think lots of men are, or at least certain types are. My DP just doesn't see the point in talking. He's not got anything to say. He didn't even look up from his computer when I got home after finding out I'd miscarried. I could write you a long list of other examples. It's not ideal but it's him and he does have other good qualities...I think. Hopefully yours does too :)

@Cream123 I'm not one of the originals but it's lovely to have "graduates" around so I'd love it if you stayed too!
Xxx

@Janefx40 sorry yours is useless in situations like this too. You're so right "got nothing to say" is exactly it. I don't even want to talk about it lots, just a check in and a cuddle.

@seven201 @Janefx40 mine is hopeless too! Completely shut off from the whole ivf process. He is being much more communicative since this positive test, even voicing his own concerns about it maybe going wrong. I think months of failure have been hard on him too. Guess they show it in different ways 😒

So in the stress of everything that happened yesterday I bloody well forgot to inject heparin. The professor told me this assists with receptivity, I have just done it now but it is 14 hours later than I should have done it. I'm so upset, I feel like I put so much effort into this cycle and the clinic has just messed everything up with doing the transfer late which has meant I've done my medications wrong :(

@Gardenlady543 i wouldn't stress about that at all honestly. My understanding is that it doesn't have a strong evidence base for receptivity but that some think it can help, so its an add on in the first place. And if it does work, then those hours won't matter. It'll be doing its thing now. The embryos don't implant straight away as we know, they do who knows what for a few days first, which is why we have to wait so bloody long to find out if it has worked! I think with all of this treatment it's easy to think it's an exact science when I just don't think it is at all.

(I'm taking heparin too and forgot to bring it with me when I left the house this morning so I'm hoping a gap doesn't matter too much. I will be taking it about 7 hours late today too.)

@whatcangowrong there are lots of men like that out there. The miscarriage taught me a lot - he just shuts down when bad stuff happens and it takes him time to process. He couldn't be there for me or share the grief when it happened but 2 days later he was more able to communicate. I learnt that I have to give him time. In an ideal world he would be able to support me but I'm pretty independent and I can cope alone for a few days if I have to. It's just one of the compromises of our relationship. He has to put up with other stuff from me and in other ways I've got a good one.

Glad he can voice things a bit more at the moment.

Congrats on your transfer @Gardenlady543 and sorry it was so stressful

@VenusStarr hope you're doing ok

My husband was useless during/after our losses. But I suppose I always protected him by doing them all At home on my own so I suppose he didn't see how "bad" they were physically to go through as well as emotionally

My ruptured ectopics was the first time I saw him cry really but maybe because they showed us the heartbeat and then said they had to stop them. I guess they felt more "real" to him plus when they ruptured they were life threatening and he said the impact of that

My (male) boss said to me once that pregnancy (and babies) is just an abstract idea to them - they don't experience it the same way we do - especially with early miscarriage when there is no outward visible sign like a bump either - and to be honest many (like my DH) struggled to engage with my pregnancies right up until the moment of birth

Went for my hcg first thing this morning. Feels like the moment of truth, but only because this is where my chemical pregnancy started to unravel a few months back I guess. In reality it's just the first of a number of moments of truth! 😑