Continued chat of all things IVF, FET & to feel sane...cycle buddies August/September -

[Bluemeadowbaby]

Hey ladies ☺️

A new thread to continue the one we've maxed out from the FET cycle buddies May/June. Anyone wishing to join no matter what stage you're at we're here to support you along the way.

A little background around me - I have a little boy who's 16mo from my second IVF round in 2019. I'm just embarking (restarting after covid setback) on my first FET cycle with the embryos I have in storage in the hope for baby #2 🤞🏼
I have severe endometriosis, hydrosalpinx tubes which have been removed so my only hope is for IVF to work again. It's been a long old journey but if I can give any hope, faith and a tonne of support to anyone who needs it I'm happy to share my story, updates on my cycle and be there to have a general chin wag ☺️

We've got this! ✨ x

@Francesmalin That'll be amazing if you can start a cycle with your next bleed!

@Bluemeadowbaby Hope you're feeling calm today. You got this.

@firefly37 It all sounds really promising so far. Keeping everything crossed for egg collection!

@2mumlife @firefly37 thank you ☺️ I'm feeling calm today, it's been nice really as even though I have had to take some annual leave I've actually been really busy! So it's taken my mind off things. Today I was really crampy and it wasn't even a "ooo this is nice to feel some cramps!" It was the sort that wanted me to sit in a hot bath and crawl out my skin it just felt very uncomfortable, kinda like the feeling where you have a water infection. Very strange! Trying not to think too much into it as tbh I'm really done with the symptom spotting last time. It's gone now but ah it wasn't very nice at all.

@firefly37 that's some great numbers! I know what you mean with the maturing of the eggs but keeping my fingers crossed for you everything will be smooth sailing for you! I've heard assisted hatching mentioned before but never really looked into it, what does it entail? Sounds like you have a great plan lined up with your clinic! X

@Francesmalin so happy to hear you're getting to go sooner than expected! It's exciting and nerve wracking at the same time but honestly, the difference when you go private is crazy! I genuinely felt like Beyoncé when I went from nhs to private with the same clinic - even had a golden robe assigned to me - I joke 😂 x

Update from me. I am starting my cycle as we speak! I am starting with 3 weeks of growth hormones with a very small dosage of genotrophin until my bleed.

Next week I am talking to the nurse to go through the all medication plan and also to the embryologist.

It seems like I will do a freeze all cycle cause I don't react to buserelin so we need to do combine triggers but hopefully this time might work. Scared and excited at the same time.

How is the rest of the gang?

@Francesmalin... Good to hear ur cracking on and I wish u every success! xx

@Bluemeadowbaby... I hope the TWW is being kind to you and I hope ur little one has settled in xx

@2mumlife... Have a wonderful rest of pregnancy, u deserve it xx

This may be my last post as Im likely to be moving away from IVF and getting on with normal life...

Things haven't gone to plan and I'm devasted as well as being stuck in Prague on my own having not seen my 5 days. After having 4 ripe juicy follicles, only 2 immature eggs were retrieved yesterday. Devastated doesn't come close... We were told they had a chance of maturing in the lab and in fact one did before we left... I don't know about the other as I just walked out. I couldn't control my tears... We have invested so much into this journey from last Summer to have it shut down with 2 immature eggs. I wanted to fly home but I have to stay and see what tomorrows update is... Its my 42nd birthday tomorrow as well... Lovely...
This cycle has cost far more than we anticipated and as a result, we absolutely cannot afford anymore.
I probably won't come back to the forums as it will likely be too upsetting but from the bottom of my heart, I hope u all get your babies this year xxx

@firefly37 thank you, trying not to slip into that mindset of desperation- don't know why but whenever it's the first week I'm like 😎 got this...but heading onto the second week is so hard, I forget how hard it is.
Bless your heart, I really do feel your pain as you type and can't imagine just how crushing that is. There is no words, just know that I am sending you so much solidarity, love and hugs your way ❤️
Sometimes life really can be so cruel, but don't ever feel like a failure. You will be missed on the board but I totally understand leaving, it is hard to read updates when things feel so unfair with your own circumstances. If you ever want to chat separately to the board about everything other than Ivf, know that my inbox is always open. Take care of yourself and hold your head high lovely x

@Francesmalin excellent news on getting started so quickly! It sounds like the clinic have a good plan for you, I know a freeze all will feel a bit annoying but at least you know your body will be in a well rested state ready for the next steps! I'm okay, I've had so much tugging that I can't ignore and if anything I did wonder if I might have a water infection as I just can't stop going to the toilet! I'm really tired today and a bit dizzy. I feel a bit different this time, I had some spotting yesterday and the day before, really trying not to look into it but it's mimicking the cycle with my little boy so I'm keeping my fingers tightly crossed 🤞🏼 x

Hi all,
Thank you @Bluemeadowbaby... You are so lovely.
Little update from Prague... As at this morning I have one 4 cell embryo of the highest grade (1) developing. It is doing well and if it continues to do so, it will be transferred tomorrow on day 3 as per the embryologist advice xx

Go @firefly37 and little embryo. I keep all my finger crossed for you ❤️❤️❤️. Keep your hope up as this might be a lucky one!

And happy birthday

@firefly37 my heart feels so happy for you!! Come on little one ❤️🤞🏼

@Bluemeadowbaby That's great you got to take some leave. Have you felt any more symptoms since the cramps? I always find the second half of the wait far harder than the first few days. Is your plan to test early or wait until OTD?

@Francesmalin How exciting that you've got started! How are you findign the growth hormones so far? I had a freeze-all the second time - I found it SO frustrating at the time, but I also seem to respond much better to FET and I think its a lot less pressure on your body.

@firefly37 What an emotional rollercoaster you must have been on last few days. I hope you managed to enjoy your birthday a bit. I'm keeping absolutely everything crossed that you get to proceed with the embryo transfer tomorrow 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

@2mumlife no more cramps just a pain in my mini 🙈 but my boobs, wow! I'm very small 😂 but my goodness they really hurt! It woke me up last night. I can't remember this last time and just putting it down to progesterone. The temptation to test is ridiculous but I just can't face getting into the habit of doing it and being disappointed. I think I will test a couple days early only because otd is next Tuesday so will do it Sunday to brace myself for happiness or a bit of a shit day x

@2mumlife where you on growth hormones as well? Do you know why they use it? For now it's all good. I need to do the injection before going to sleep so it's all good for now and the dosage is very very little

Hello lovelies,
Thank you for your kind words...
So I am officially PUPO in Prague!
I can't quite believe I made it this far... Our one little "dodgy" (definitely it's nickname, my son was "firefly" and my daughter "venom")... Has grown into a PERFECT 8 cell embryo grade 1... So proud of little "dodgy". The doctor said it was so lovely it had to be a girl! Lol... I know I'm a long way off and nothing is guaranteed, but omg what a week I have had here to actually end up on a positive is unbelievable xxxx

@firefly37 i am so happy for you! The embryo is a fighter!!! Now you need to keep us posted on your progress!!!

You are giving me hope now!!!

@Francesmalin No never had growth hormones, it's why in curious what they're like :)

@firefly37 Fantastic news! Come on little "dodgy"! My chemical pregnancy was with an embryo we nicknamed the "ugly duckling" lol was the first positive test result I'd ever had even if it wasn't to be it gave us hope.

Had my first NHS scan today. Apparently this fetus is an awkward bugger - stayed face down for entire scan despite my best attempts to make it shift. Everything looking well though so far🤞🤞🤞🤞

@2mumlife it's very tiny needle and it doesn't hurt. I had a very good call with the Embryologist today and she also thinks that I didn't respond to the trigger in the last two cycles. Luckily I did mature one egg during my cycle in July, otherwise it would be a different situation. We are going to do ICSI cause they can mature the eggs overnight and inject them on day 1 if needed. I won't lie, I am very nervous about the all situation and I am terrified that it won't work again but I am trying to be positive as I should be in good care with my new doctor.

I will give the updates here so you girls should all stay on this thread! :)

Do you know if you are having a boy or a girl or is it too early?

@firefly37 this is amazing!!! I'm so happy for you!! Come on little dodge! 😍❤️ x

@2mumlife so happy to hear everything is looking good! 😍 x

@Francesmalin That sounds like a really sensible plan to give you the best chance of a positive outcome. It fascinates me this whole maturing eggs in the lab thing! Not something my clinic offered from what I understand.

You can't find out sex through NHS until the 20 week anomaly scan. I'm on another thread though with loads of ladies who are paying privately to find out the sex early. We don't give a damn what the sex is (and not intending to find out) - just hoping for a healthy pregnancy that ends with a health living baby. To be honest, I hate the whole dressing in blue/pink thing just because of an infants genitalia to begin with anyway, so we'll be trying to avoid gender stereotyping and indoctrination to gender roles as much as possible either way (realise I probably have a more extreme view on this than most! but I find it really disturbing that adults alter thier behavious towards infants based on the colour of the clothes)

@Bluemeadowbaby How are you getting on? You must be coming up for testing date soon?

@2mumlife I'm okay, I've really had a wobble the last couple days. I tested yesterday and BFN 🤦🏻‍♀️ tested this morning and I swear I see something but I know from experience this is probably not it. I'm feeling quite down as that was our last embryo and not quite sure how I'll face life knowing there may not be a possibility of a second. DP is very upset too. I'll still hold out some hope. Also, we popped our house back on the market last week, it sold in a day! A little bit of hope is the equity we have is great and some of the funding we have from selling could help towards a fresh round. I'm not counting myself out until OTD but I feel better prepared testing a little earlier - I wasn't going to but I haven't felt like I did with my little boy and not to sound patronising to anyone TTC but those feelings are hard to explain but you kinda just know if that makes sense? I'm signed off work through occupational health until otd and work have been great and suggested if the outcome isn't as I expected there's no rush to head back. I feel I've lost myself a little bit so trying to get myself feeling more human this weekend!
Sorry for the ramble 😄 x

Thanks for the good wishes u lovely lot...

@2mumlife... I had to find out the sex as I hated trying to pick names for both... I found it a real struggle!! I realised there are not a lot of names that my partner and I could jointly agree on!! Xx

@Francesmalin... I found out that as long as an egg is M1 (part cooked) there is a really good chance it will mature in the lab. Both my immature did in the end after only an hour or so. I'm also on a fb group for women with DOR and I was inundated with messages from women who were pregnant with immature eggs!!! So there is a lot of hope xx

@Bluemeadowbaby... I'm sorry for ur wobble... But I hope u did see a starter line. When is OTD? I've got everything crossed for you xx

As for me, I'm day 5 past 3 day transfer... According to timeline of development, if Dodge is still growing they should be finishing hatching /looking for somewhere to snuggle in. I had assisted hatching and I read this can speed up the hatching phase. I'm very nervous... At 42 I know my eggs have higher chance of being abnormal. I just hope the supplements I took to help this (mainly Coq10) have done their thing. I've done tons of reading and it's so confusing... Dodge was a grade 1, 8 cell... The best grade for day 3... However apparently this basically means nothing as the embryo can still be abnormal ... So with that in mind, WHY BOTHER GRADING DAY 3 AT ALL!!!! I find with ivf and fertility issues, you can basically find a study or site for or against everything! Another positive we found out though, is that DPs sperm is still perfect! So from years of abnormal samples, the supplements and vitamins he is taking have well and truly worked! He is so proud! Lol.... Physically, I have the usual little twinges and sore boobs but I know this is mostly caused by progesterone supplement so no idea what's going on really... Lots of love xxx

@Bluemeadowbaby I'm sorry the early test wasn't positive. I would say don't lose hope though - I didn't feel any sense of 'aha! I'm pregnant!' when I tested positive - actually totally the opposite, we got to test day and I didn't really want to do the test and see another negative. That's amazing news the house sold in a day! And it might be a sign that there are options if you do want to do another fresh round if this little bean doesn't stick. Sending you all the positive vibes until OTD xx

@firefly37 Try not to get hung up on grading - remember, even grading a day 5 embryo highly means nothing really as it can still be chromosomally abnormal. The main thing is Dodge is in the best environment possible. Its great news DPs sperm was looking top quality for fertilisation though! Keeping everything crossed Dodge is snuggling in for the long haul.

We've also been finding names a challenge. We've got 1 name for each that we both would approve, but we won't necessarily go with them as we're still talking about it. Me and DP have different last names (we're not married as never could be bothered with the hassle with family to do it, but we were talking over the weekend about writing a will once baby was here, and decided it might just make more sense to get married, so we're floating the idea of doing it summer 2023). Anyway, our last names would be AWFUL double-barrelled (and we both dislike double-barrellled names anyway), so we decided long time ago if we were successful we'd use her last name for kids, and I could always change mine in the future. Her last name is an O'Irish name though, which I've realised SO FEW first names go well with! We're also dissagreeing about whether to use a middle name (DP doesn't have a middle name and doesn't see the need for one). So we'll see.

@Bluemeadowbaby hi sorry I haven’t been on this thread for a bit so just catching up. I’m also in the 2WW and feeling up and down every day that passes. I’m 4 dpt today and woke up this morning having a crampy feeling low down as if AF is starting. Boobs also feel more sore than yesterday but this symptom spotting is bring back bad memories of my failed cycle in December and felt really depressed all morning and had a cry as if I already know it’s over or something which I know is irrational but I just can’t get back to feeling positive. I don’t know why I’m feeling like this already when I had a double transfer on Friday of 2x 4BB and one even expanded further post thaw. The whole team had been super positive and I feel like I can’t keep up that energy now. Just need some help/ words of wisdom from successful stories whether anyone felt the same way

Hi ladies. Sadly I don't have any good news today. OTD and BFN. I feel so lost, that was our last little one and I don't know where to go from here. Feeling well and truly drained emotionally, physically and financially. I know I'll be okay in time, time really does heal but I'm not ready for it right now. I was laid in bed this morning dreading to test as I just knew the outcome.
I'll stay on the thread as I want to support you all but if I don't reply in the meantime just know you're all in my thoughts and I pray you will all get your little babies.
The process is horrible whether you have no babies or babies already, that feeling never goes away but seeing as today is international woman's day - I salute you all! You are so strong!!
Lots of love as always x