Continued chat of all things IVF, FET & to feel sane...cycle buddies August/September -

[Bluemeadowbaby]

Hey ladies ☺️

A new thread to continue the one we've maxed out from the FET cycle buddies May/June. Anyone wishing to join no matter what stage you're at we're here to support you along the way.

A little background around me - I have a little boy who's 16mo from my second IVF round in 2019. I'm just embarking (restarting after covid setback) on my first FET cycle with the embryos I have in storage in the hope for baby #2 🤞🏼
I have severe endometriosis, hydrosalpinx tubes which have been removed so my only hope is for IVF to work again. It's been a long old journey but if I can give any hope, faith and a tonne of support to anyone who needs it I'm happy to share my story, updates on my cycle and be there to have a general chin wag ☺️

We've got this! ✨ x

@Verbena87 @Millie029 thanks ladies 💕 which clinic are you at @Millie029 I wonder if we're at the same one? X

@Verbena87 wooo hooo woooo!!! I am literally on happy all is negative 🥳 it's okay to of gone into a small cloud of feeling a bit blah...anxiety really does strike and then linger sometimes doesn't it so just be kind to yourself while your kind comes back around - you've got this x

I went out with my friends for the first time in 3 years last night! I had the BEST time ever!! I haven't done this while we've been on meds/ivf train before as I've always been conscious I might ruin something for an outcome but I just thought do you know what, to hell with this! I need to let my hair down, do myself up and just have a bloomin drink and dance the night away. I feel like I'm 21 again nursing a little hangover but I wouldn't have it any other way - just ordering myself a big fat greasy fry up and going to sit in my pjs and just veg aaaall day x

@Verbena87 I hope you manage to have a better day today. I’m in a 4:40pm, 4 of my 5 embryos were still looking really good yesterday but I’m still a bit anxious on how many will make it until tomorrow, I know you only need one but I’d love to have spare for future too. I have no idea how we’re meant to be staying super relaxed through this all. xx

@Verbena87 Wohoo for the negative pcr test!! All the best to you and @PinkRose100 for transfer day tomorrow 🤞🤞
@Bluemeadowbaby I'm at Hull, what about you? It sounds like such a fun time you had. So glad you went for it! Going and letting your hair down and having some fun can be such good fuel for well being. I hope you enjoyed the drinks for us all! 😊 x

@Millie029 I'm in Hull too!! It was really sad when I went for my zoladex injection, all the photos of the babies and everything had all been taken down, boxes everywhere but hey they let me keep a pen 😂 Haha I did have a great time it was so nice just to have a boogie and feel the stresses melt away! Now curled up with a Terry's chocolate orange, cuppa and goggle box 🥰 x

Hi everyone!

We are TTC no 1 and got the news a few weeks ago that we need ICSI. We've got our eligibility appointment next week.

DH has 0 normal forms and I'm on clomid for long cycles.

At the moment I'm really quite scared and daunted by it all. The process sounds so hard and the chances of it working aren't great. Then there's covid too that could mess everything up! I've made my mind up that I don't want to start a cycle before Christmas 🙈

How has everyone been getting on? Any advice?

Sorry to be so negative! Thank you so much @Bluemeadowbaby for inviting me to the chat 💙

Hi. I'm a contributor from several weeks ago. So many new names. I had successful pregnancy test and have viability test this afternoon. I am 6wk and 5 days.

@seathistle welcome to the group. It’s totally understandable to be daunted. After so long trying I have actually found IVF a positive experience so far as I have something to actually to do help TTC. Every day drugs to focus on, and regular scans rather than being alone, pointlessly testing LH and HCG levels every day. I haven’t got to the 2 week wait though which I’ve heard is hard. I actually regret now waiting so long. It will take over your life though so it’s a good decision to enjoy a few months before you start. In my experience it honestly isn’t soo bad. xxx

@Hansoo that’s brilliant news, I hope all goes well for you later xxx

@PinkRose100 @Verbena87 good luck for today 💕 x

Hey ! I forgot to unsubscribe the thread so I have read your messages today! I had wine last weekend and a bit of fun but this morning the all situation came hunting me again. It will take time to digest what happened for real! Definitively I will come back and keep you posted with my news. X

@PinkRose100 thank you so much for your message. You've really made me feel so much better about it.

I totally see where you're coming from with the TTC by yourself and now it's monitored and helped with the right medication it is more positive. We've been trying 2 years and I always felt it was my fault that it didn't happen this month because I forgot to take my temperature etc etc

How long did it take between your first meeting at the clinic to starting on the medication?

Just had my implantation. I had one 6BB embryo which was good to implant, the others they didn’t hold our much hope for but are going to leave them until tomorrow to check as I’d like to keep some for future.
@Verbena87 how was yours?

@seathistle we decided I would start IVF in August but annoyingly the consultant was away on his summer holiday so I had an initial scan and nurses appointment end Aug and started drugs for my September cycle on day 2 of my cycle 10 Sep. It all happened quite quickly from then. Oww but I’m currently private as due to recurrent miscarriages don’t technically quality for NHS as I have convinced in the past year. Maybe try using OvuSense internal monitor over the next few months if you haven’t tried that as it may help x

@seathistle So glad to see you joining the thread 💕 we're here for you every step of the way - sometimes we make boards saying certain months but this ivf journey is full of set backs and different journeys that they continue for a very long time so be assured we will be here for you when you're ready.
It's very daunting starting out but the ball gets rolling very quickly when you have your first consultation. If you feel you'd like to wait then you go for it! Do what feels right. There really is no right or wrong time to start and sadly with covid it seems it's here for the long run which is highly frustrating but here's hoping we're out of the worst of it 🤞🏼
My little boy was from an ICSI cycle and I have 2 embryos from that cycle which will hopefully be transferred first week of November - again set backs come, we were meant to transfer in August 🙈 but if you need to know a low down of what's to be expected fire away with questions!
The only advice I can give is to keep strong and trust the process, the first time I went into it I was like "yes this is going to work everything will be just perfect I have the solution to my issues". It didn't go how I expected and that really set me back. The second time I went in with a more realistic approach that I'd have to have patience, a lot of hope and be firm with the clinic if I felt something wasn't right - you know your body better than anyone. I was very laid back second time round but I think it's because I'd set myself up for failure, I have a habit of being quite negative towards myself but positive for others 🤦🏻‍♀️ but I guess I set myself up for failure to soften any blows. I thought ivf would be a really hard process. For me personally it made me feel very empowered as I finally was able to have control of my fertility, weirdly I actually enjoyed each step of the stims, scans, egg collection was scary for me but for me it was more not being in control (I don't like being sedated). Physically I found it okay, meds can make you feel a bit iffy but keep control of your mind that it's just the meds - I woke up today so dizzy, sweating and feeling horrible, usually I'd end up having a panic attack but I managed to convince myself it was indeed the meds and I soon felt okay. Emotionally I really suffered and didn't get the support I need during my treatment which developed into PND after my little boy was born, so take all the comfort you can get whether that be from family, friends or your clinics counsellor.
Wishing you all the luck in the world 💕 x

@Francesmalin glad to hear you let your hair down and had the wine!! It will take time lovely, you do you and you know we are here waiting for you when you're ready 💕 x

@PinkRose100 excellent!! What a grade too! Here's hoping little embie settles in quickly and your tww is quick! Do you have any plans for the tww? Sending you lots of luck and sticky vibes ✨ how are you feeling? X

@Verbena87 how did you get on today lovely? X

Embryo is on board. Have had some pinkish spotting since, though only very slight. Anyone else has this? Can it be normal?

@Bluemeadowbaby Oww do you think that’s good being 6BB? I’m new to the grading and had felt a bit disappointed when I heard it was just average with only 40% chance of success. We’ve got a lovely place booked next week near Bath with a hot tub I can enjoy watching my husband in ☺️🙄 it will be nice to finally have a break and hopefully distract from the TTW and stop me doing hourly pregnancy tests. xx

@PinkRose100 so sorry for your losses. I'm glad you were able to get help privately.

That does sound quite fast that it all gets going. I'm keeping everything crossed for you. I haven't used ovusense, I'll look into it! Thank you

@Bluemeadowbaby thank you so much for your support. It's really reassuring that you and @PinkRose100 said it's been a manageable process.

I'm sorry you were feeling rough. Are you feeling a bit better now? That must have been exhausting.

I think personally I'm not feeling entirely optimistic it will work. I think that's partly why I'm putting it off until after Christmas because I just can't believe it will work out for us. And can't bear the disappointment at Christmas time. But then will Christmas be a bit of a distraction where as January is just totally miserable??

That in turn makes me feel so guilty, like if I'm thinking like that during a cycle and not doing positive affirmations etc then its my fault it didn't work and I ruined it... but I think I'm just trying to protect myself from the disappointment?

Such a difficult thing to get my head around but yours and @PinkRose100 kind words have really really helped. So thank you very much xx

@PinkRose100 glad your transfer went ok - when can you test? My test day is the 8th I think, and I’m hoping to avoid testing before then: too crazy-making for me!

@seathistle welcome! Wishing you all the luck when you’re ready to start, and also, please don’t worry about not doing positive affirmations every cycle - if positive thinking got people pregnant we’d all be significantly richer and I think there’s an awful lot of toxic positivity around conception.

@seathistle before I started this journey I always wanted my baby to have a good birthday so they were older in the school year rather than the youngest as statistically the oldest have better life chances. If you get pregnant in December you could have an August baby, so the youngest in the year, whereas January (as long as they aren’t premmy) you’d have a September baby. So actually waiting would give your baby better prospects ☺️. Have you had your ovarian reserve tested yet? If that’s good and you are young there’s no reason to rush. Probably worth moving forward with clinic appointments though now and then telling them when you want to start the drugs as you don’t want to wait only to find out they have a waiting list or they want you to go on a long protocol suppressing your hormones for a couple of months before you can try. xx

@Verbena87 thank you! That's so true. It's so easy to pile the pressure on. I totally hear you with the toxic positivity. I'm keeping everything crossed for the 8th for you 🤞🏼🤞🏼

@PinkRose100 that's a really good point! No I haven't yet I don't think. Just standard bloods on day 21. I think I'm having all of that done at our eligibility check. We are 30 so don't feel massively time pressured, but don't want to drag it out forever. It's hard to remember a time when TTC wasn't the centre of our lives 🙈

@Verbena87 so glad to hear embies on board, I have been thinking of you today. I can't remember if I had spotting but I always remember the clinic advising this can happen along with cramps maybe a little irritation? X

@PinkRose100 going on my clinic and their grading I think this sounds good (I'd be happy with the grade if it was mine 😄) they told me A = excellent B = great/good C = poor and the number is 6 being hatching so here's hoping that embie settles in quickly for you! This sounds like the perfect time away, give your toes a dabble in the hot tub at least 😉 enjoy! And also enjoy being PUPO x

@seathistle I'm feeling much better now thank you, I still have my moments but I had CBT to help me through and this time around I've taken up counselling through the clinic to guide me through. Sometimes just having that extra pair of ears is a blessing. I'm the same as you and I always blame myself if things don't go the way I hoped, I kinda put a "it always happens to me" label on myself and I know it's the worst way to be. But going through this process and even getting to where you are today is the strongest thing any woman can put her body and mind through and you should be so proud of how far you've come. Go at your own pace but I too second what @PinkRose100 says in regards to letting your clinic know the timeline you're thinking, there can be a wait especially with covid backlogs at some clinics and the disappointment with waiting really is a pain in the arse (but just shows how much you really want it deep down 🥰) it's so very daunting when you start out because it's like holy crud okay this is actually happening, but I understand your wanting to wait until after Christmas I think I'd have the same mindset too. Here's me saying that with a transfer in November 😂🤦🏻‍♀️ but having said that I'd do it tomorrow in a heartbeat if I could x

@Verbena87 how was it?? Sorry meant to message earlier but been racing up and down the country dropping parents off past few days. Hope all ok and you are resting. Such an exciting time! .
@PinkRose100 was yours today too? Fingers and toes crossed.
I can't keep up - so much activity from our group!! Hope you are also resting up. Enjoy your time now being PUPO - Fingers crossed for the poas!!
@seathistle welcome 
@Bluemeadowbaby how are you?
@Millie029 -how are you feeling?
Big love to all.
Xx

@Verbena87 I’m glad to hear it went well. Yes I’m testing on the 8th too, I’m a serial tester so am really going to try and hold out until at least the 7th as I end up spending stupid money and driving myself crazy doing them. I like to see the line go darker for reassurance before I get excited. I hope all goes well for you over the next week and work isn’t too stressful! xx