IVF/ICSI May/June

[Cauliflower82]

Hi everyone

I’m creating a new thread with the hope of finding people with similar dates to me. I am due to start medication on May 13th with the hope egg collection will be June 19th. I’m 34, female factor fertility.

Anyone else out there with similar dates?

Kitty that does sound like a busy day! Is trigger tonight?

Helene great news about the embryos, fingers crossed for you for Wednesday.

Mouse, I was thinking that. Work is a good distraction, mind you tonight I'm not feeling work tomorrow.

All, my app doesn't let me tag lol! Sorry! It's probably me not being technically minded!! Xxx

Hi girls. Well this is the first time I’ve joined a thread like this in 6 years reading all your posts brings back a lot of memories and emotions. So I wanted to come on here and give you hope. I have pcs. I hyper stimulated on first cycle got 33 eggs no transfer all frozen 2 months later had 2 frozen put in which resulted in quads unfortunately misscarried at 8 weeks. But took 5 weeks to lose last one. ( long story). But fresh cycle started 3 months later and resulted in twin boys. It’s a huge rollercoaster but you will all get there think positive keep busy keep hydrated and don’t do a test until the date they give you test I was really strict with myself.

Well I’m now considering booking in for another go my last try’s were all nhs. This will have to be private I’ve been quite emotional this week as not sure I’m doing the right thing, unfortunately this ivf journey doesn’t finish when you have a baby well I thought it did until a year ago then all of a sudden panic set in I’m getting old(39) I should be grateful I have 2 why do I want another. Asking myself all these questions to be honest I don’t know the answer to any of them. Just one confused and emotional lady at the minute.

@Cauliflower82 yay! Great news on your period. Mine only started the day before my scan so I was worried but was cleared to start stims. Great news!

@mouse1234567 you're doing brilliantly. You just need to distract yourself (remind me of this soon).

@DawnK77 well done on getting through today and let us know what they say tomorrow.

@Jackieadam1980 welcome. Have another go, why not?! You're younger than I am, give it a try!

Have just done the trigger. Once again convinced one of the pots of powder was empty even though I checked them both before mixing (and they weren't). I think the second a tiny drop of water hits the powder, it all disappears. I am pretty much convinced I'll have hardly any eggs and with attrition I'll then have no embryos but worrying about it is going to make no difference at all to the outcome. Two days off work this week then off to Portugal with my mum next week (she's currently walking the Camino de Santiago in Spain. Nutter.)

@Weenumpty thank you for being so open about your feelings and I'm sorry you're also struggling. It's awful and so consuming. My mum keeps telling me the drugs are making me blow things out of proportion believing things that aren't too big are huge but I can't tell if it's the drugs or how I genuinely feel. I hope it's the drugs but I'm not sure.

@RRoonilWazlib maybe we are at similar points. I have a scan next Tuesday to check the thickness of my lining. If okay transfer is the following week.

@Ginandtonic31 it's likely to be the drugs. I think the hardest thing is that you can't trust how you're feeling anymore. Stick with it. I definitely think the counsellor is the way to go; they must be very used to this. Stick with it.

Glad you got a good number of eggs Dawn, hope you get to transfer :)

KittyKat - your day sounds stressful. Glad you have triggered now. Wishing you luck! Portugal sounds like a great idea!

Have a pretty quiet day at work today and keep finding myself daydreaming about what it would be like if this actually worked! Playing out in my head how great it would be to be told it worked, have a little bump and then hold my own baby. And then I have to tell myself to not get carried away as the odds are against me :( does anyone else get like that? I have my scan tomorrow so hopefully I will be able to start stimming.

@Ginandtonic31it sounds like we are! Transfer will also be the week after if my lining is looking good. I'll be on cd10 on tuesday, they said it's a day or two earlier than they usually would have scanned me but I still ovulated after doing the injections last cycle so they want to check earlier.

How are you feeling today?

@RRoonilWazlib I still feel the same. Just confused about what I should be doing with my life, questioning everything! I want it to go away as I want to be excited on this journey but I'm just not. I still haven't heard back from the clinic about a counsellor either. I just feel so lost in my own thoughts and it scares me as it isn't just fear of what if this doesn't work. It's gone completely beyond that. One minute I feel ok and the next all these negative feelings and fears come back!

I didn't realise you could still ovulate on the drugs!

@Ginandtonic31 awh I'm sorry you feel down :( that must be really confusing as well! Is there any chance you can call the clinic again today to chase up about seeing the counsellor? Our clinic is great on the care side of things but the admin side could be better.

It's not common to still ovulate on the injections! The consultant said it happens randomly in around 5% of cases so we were just unlucky last cycle! I think that's why they scanned me on day 2 and doing my lining scan on day 10!

Sending some virtual hugs your way x

Thanks so much @RRoonilWazlib. I'm so fearful to say how I'm really thinking as I am worried they will say stop everything until you're 100% certain. I tried to tell a GP for some support and she just said well stop and give it a year then see how you feel! I walked out feeling worse!

Ooo ok. I was slightly concerned I could fall pregnant naturally. I didn't dare say because didn't want to pee people off as we are actually having it for genetic reasons (although I've no idea if I'm fertile as I have PCOS).

@DawnK77 wow great EC, hoping you get good news today from clinic.

@KittyKatSmile I'm guessing you have EC tomorrow - hope it all goes well.

@Zest11 I do the same. So many things are up in the air regarding both work (I have to travel a lot for work both in Europe and US) and personal life (house renovations, invitations from friends to wine festivals and vineyards 🙄) and I find it difficult to make decisions and plan in the short and long term. I want to plan everything based on successful outcome from our IVF journey, but also need to be realistic re the probability of that. The work travel thing is complicated - due to my medical history consultant recommends I not fly at all if I get pregnant. At the moment my tactic is to volunteer someone else in my team to go in my place!

My bloods came back - mild OHSS but they aren't worried. Apparently it will ease up if I drink plenty of water and take painkillers. Progrsterone pessary side effects seem to just be adding to the symptoms. Most importantly I am still on for tomorrow for ET.

@Helene2019 that's good news, hydrate, feel great. Brilliant. And fingers crossed for ET.

@Zest11 oh yes, I do that all the time. Whether just generally or when I'm invited to things. Just so hard to not obsess over it.

@Ginandtonic31 really unhelpful of your GP. If your clinic can't help then google counsellors in your area and arrange to see someone: around £70 and the best money ever spent for peace of mind and reassurance. You need to prioritise yourself. We are putting vast quantities of hormones into your bodies; it stands to reason that our minds will be all over the place x

@RRoonilWazlib good news and progress! How are you feeling?

Helene that's great - good luck for tomorrow! Will be thinking of you!

Zest, I do that too, then tell myself off. It's hard not to, and agreed it's hard to be invited to things, in the back of your head your thinking hmmmm might be pregnant other half of me thinks I won't be, I'll be attending.

Didn't end up going to work today, woke up all fuzzy and still feeling a bit drugged , blurry eyes etc so thought best not to drive. Ovaries are aching, can't stop weeing and have constipation so probs TMI but I feel rammed! Anyone else feel like this after EC? Xxx

Hi all

Sorry so much to catch up on and I feel really bad but I can't reply to each individual.
But I wanted to say @ginandtonic31, as you may remember I cocked up my injections first time around but I felt utterly miserable on them. This cycle, I've had 3 or 4 times where I've acted like a crazy person (one was forcing my DH to cook a meal that I knew he couldn't do!) But on the whole, I feel like me. The one thing that kept me sense was those around me telling him this is the drugs as I'm not like this normally.

Anyone else suddenly got needle fear? It took me a good few seconds to pluck up the courage to inject last night.
Oh and my period is also late so I won't be scanned for at least a few days as the nurse said I needed to be at least a few days in of a normal period.

Hi all,

Still reading these and keeping up with all your news. Time is going quickly, hope everyone waiting for something to happen is able to bear the wait ok!

@Ginandtonic31 It's completely normal to feel all over the place during IVF, I think we all feel like that to some extent. The drugs are pretty strong and it's already a very emotional time. Agree that a counsellor can really make a lot of difference. One place you might not have thought to look is your employer - mine, for example, subscribes to a 24 hours counselling helpline, and you can talk to them about anything. Yours might have one too?

@DawnK77 I felt like that too, good idea to stay home and rest up, EC can take it out of you. Hope you feel better soon.

@Helene2019 Great to hear that four have made it and hope the transfer is still on. I was told protein helps as well for OHSS (this is my go-to OHSS reference: theduff.co.uk/ovarian-hyperstimulation-syndrome-ohss-ivf/)

@Jackieadam1980 Welcome and thanks for your story. It's a tricky decision, but if a voice inside you is saying have another go, it's hard to silence that voice. 39 isn't old though, so don't feel like you have to make a decision immediately, take the time you need.

@Cauliflower82 Just wanted to say that your posts are great, and your honesty really helps us all, so please keep it up!

For me, there's not much to report. The polyp has put everything on the back-burner - had been hopeful of a late July transfer but looks like the earliest will be late August now. Our consultant tried to cheer me up by saying that at least the embryos are on ice and aren't ageing any more, even if I am(!) I'll keep lurking on here anyway, keeping my fingers crossed for you all

Ginandtonic31 please push for help with a counsellor. The fertility clinic may only be able to give you a couple but you can self refer also. www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/types-of-therapy/ there will be a service in your local area. I am currently seeing someone (and it has taken a bit of persistence and a few goes as I find some people I didn't "click" with but it can be helpful.) Like you the anxiety/depression went beyond the fertility and has made me question so many things. However it is likely that it is all the drugs playing with your mind, causing you to dwell on what would otherwise possibly be more of a fleeting comment but the NHS does give therapy.

Glad it's not just me that gets carried away. And yes...about going away or planning activities for the last few YEARs I have thouht "naaah won't be able to do that because I'll be pregnant" and the event passes and nothing. I find it so flipping hard that they haven't found a reason for our struggles so I still think "maybe this month..."

@Ginandtonic31 listen to today's episode of BFN podcast; they talk about exactly what you're going through with the drugs. Have jumped straight on here to let you know.

Love and hugs ladies x

@DawnK77 yes I felt costipated and full of trapped wind. I suggest heat pad / hot water bottle, Paracetamol if needed and drinking loads of water, eating simple to digest food like porridge/soup....ice cream 😂

@DawnK77 not sure if I've said this before but syrup of figs is really good for constipation (available from Superdrug, not from Boots) and actually just tastes like sugar syrup.

Hi all, thanks for the tips! I've just woken up and feel worse. I think going to be a freeze all on Friday.

Anyone doing a freeze all, is it generally the cycle after? This maybe a silly question, but after egg collection if doing a freeze all, do you have a natural period? Just I don't have periods , always have to take tablets to kick start one, just wondering if I will have a natural one now.

EVERYONE thank you so so much! It's just so good to know it isn't just me! I have been so fearful (and so have my parents) that I will just walk out on my husband or something! I will catch up with everyone else tonight and the BFN podcast -I'm sorry for missing so many people. I'm off to the cinema tonight with my mum to see Rocketman. I've had to force myself but know I have to do it. I suppose my worry has been I felt a bit like this since September time and I wasn't on drugs then but my mum is adamant it's because of my round in June and the drugs from that still and the pill. I'm just so grateful to you all sharing your stories and supporting me when I feel like it's so easy for people to tell me to stop the drugs and see how I feel later.

@Ginandtonic31 I hope you enjoy the film tonight - it’s SO good and I love Elton John’s music too. So beautiful. I’ve been really lucky not to experience depression when going through this as I was so worried about it. But, saying that, I have had bad days, really bad days when I’ve just cried. It’s good that you’re forcing yourself out the house.

@DawnK77 sorry to hear that it looks like you’re doing a freeze all. Easier said from this end, but if they recommend it then it’s definitely going to be for the best so try not to be too disheartened.

@mincedpea damn that polyp!!!! Hope you’re doing okay. It’s nice to hear from you again :).

@Mrbay YES YES YES!!!! I feel like my needle fear is out of control ATM. I’ve went so backwards, it’s unbelievable. I don’t know what’s happened - I’m just scared of making the first move. It doesn’t even really hurt but I am beginning to get quite annoyed at the injections. I sat for about ten minutes tonight thinking that I just can’t do this.

@Helene2019 best of luck for tomorrow! I hope it goes super well.

@KittyKatSmile best of luck to you too. The most nerve wracking part - I have no doubt that you’ll do brilliantly. If you feel okay tomorrow night, let us know how you get on. Thinking of you and sending lots of love and best wishes.

@Zest11 I missed your message on Sunday about the potential for us being stimming buddies!! Yay. Good luck with your scan tomorrow. Mine is at 8.30 so nice and early start. I’m terrified - I don’t know how I’ll cope with two bastard injections right now. But I am so DESPERATE to get stimming so 🤞

@Cauliflower82 @Zest11 good luck for your scans tomorrow. Keeping fingers crossed for you.

@Cauliflower82 there's actually very little difference in adding the extra injection; you'll hardly notice and it will be so good for you to start stimming after this marathon you've been on....!

Excellent news about tomorrow Helen2019 and good luck to you too KittyKatSmile I hope there are some good eggs in there!
Glad you are managing to distract yourself Ginandtonic31 it sounds like you have some good support around you :)
And yes Cauliflower82 I hope all goes well tomorrow for you too. The damn injections but hopefully it will be worth it for us all!

Everyone, do keep us posted on how things go tomorrow if you feel up to it :)