Trying to conceive baby#2 following ivf treatment for #1

[lucieloos]

I thought I would start this thread as I can't see anything similar. We underwent many rounds of icsi and following a couple of bfns, and an ectopic pregnancy we were finally blessed with our beautiful daughter last year.

We recently started thinking about baby no 2 and had 4 frozen embryos of which 2 had been tested and found to be chromosomally normal so are meant to have a better chance. We didnt have the other 2 tested.

A couple of weeks back we had our first fet with one of the tested embryos and got a bfp super early at 4dp5dt. Sadly by 8dpt the line was barely visible and resulted in a chemical pregnancy. I've been feeling really down about it as this was meant to be a super duper embryo with no genetic problems which they said was the main reason embryos fail.

I thought it would be easier trying for #2 and of course it is in a way as I realise how lucky I am to have had a baby but I can feel the infertility fog starting to descend again as I realise although I've had a brief respite I will never be like my fertile friends and I do really want another baby and a sibling for my little girl.

Im feeling a bit negative at the moment. We will probably go back for the other tested embryo in the near future but I can't see how I would ever get lucky enough to get 2 bfps in a row. These things just don't happen to me so just not too hopeful about it at all. We said that if we used all of our frosties with no success we would be happy with what we have but already I am thinking should I do more fresh cycles. I will be 39 soon though so time isn't on my side for that.

Anyway just wondering if anyone else is in a similar situation and would like to share the journey. Please come and say hi.

Great news on fertilisation twinkle. Will be cheering your embryos on.

pony hoping today has brought better news for you.

My debrief appointment isn’t til 4 April which is a bit frustrating but at least means I can just forget about it all for a couple of weeks over Easter.

Oh that's annoying snow but like you say at least you can have a few weeks off from it all. Do you think you will go again on your next cycle after debrief?

Thanks both 😘

Well assuming my period turns up this week that’ll be around cd16ish so in theory if we wanted to go again that cycle we could (I usually ov on cd21). I guess I can decide closer to the time and depending on what we discuss at the debrief. But right now am tempted to sit next (this) cycle out and try again in May. Feel like I’ve tried the “relaxed approach” to FET and it didn’t work so now I should take some time to prepare properly....

Are you doing natural fets then snow?

Hello all, can I join? Going for FET from frozen embies (we have two but will put one back) from our cycle that gave us our lovely daughter who is now 10 months. DH and I have been trying again in the vain hope that something might be different this time. I feel like I have something to prove to myself about getting pregnant naturally, like if I somehow manage it on my own then there isn't something wrong with this body of mine! So hard still, and unexpectedly so raw from those infertile years. So desperate for another one but so scared to start on that bloody treadmill again... Lucieloos I feel like we were on the same board last year. Hope you are doing OK. Sorry for your loss.

Hi jen yes we were definitely on the same board last time around. Feel like I recognise so many names on here. I guess we are getting to that stage where we are all looking to try again. I love this board as it makes me feel so much better talking to others going through the same thing. I think we are probably going to go back and try again straight away. I always find the waiting the hardest and I just want to get on with things and I'm not getting any younger so don't have any time to spare. I know I'm going to be completely devastated if it doesn't work second time around though. Just feel like how many times can I be on the wrong side of the stats but then I got a bfp on this fet even though it didn't work so what's the chances of getting 2 bfps in a row?! Probably not great.

We haven't really tried naturally much at all. We tried so much in the time leading up to ivf that I just don't want that pressure again but might be worth a go if this next one fails.

We tried naturally for over a year this time

Yes we are doing natural fets this time. Last time I did a medicated as I had really hit or miss ovulation - I had so many anovulatory cycles which is why we did ivf (mild male factor too thus we didn’t try iui). After stopping breastfeeding my periods seem to have come back v regularly so we did natural - but will be asking doc given my history whether it might be better to do a medicated.

We haven’t bothered trying naturally really at all. I have no faith in my body at this point so don’t really see the point. Roll on the miracle bfp -as if I’d be that lucky-!

Well done on the seven fertilising Twinkle, and fingers crossed for them making it to day 5.

Sorry you have to wait until 4th April Snow but hopefully with Easter, it'll go by quickly.

Yes, Lucie we have definitely met on the boards, and you also kindly helped decipher all my confusing results! I was so pleased when you finally got your BFP. Sorry for your recent loss x. I also find the waiting so hard, I just want to get on with it. Will you start again next cycle?

Hi Jen, it's a horrible treadmill isn't it? We have given it a half arsed attempt but I think I have accepted it won't work anyway. When are you starting your treatment?

Argh, I'm irrationally annoyed (though it feels rational to me). This time around we just need to have updated std testing and DH needs to have a new SA before starting the process. I went to make his SA appointment, and there's no free appointments until the start of May! Then to make matters worse, DH doesn't even know if he'll be in the country for it, and we're away in June for the month, so I'm not sure when we'll actually be starting again. In my head I know it's only a few more months (hopefully) but it feels like all I ever do in this game is wait.

Hi everyone,
I did my beta and sadly it was a negative.
Just need sometime to get over this shock.
Good luck to you all

pony I'm sorry to hear that. Take care of yourself. So hard to deal with the disappointment.

Twinkle seven is great, congrats. Massive fingers crossed for them making it to day 5 - you must be on tenterhooks!

Snow sucks to have to wait, enjoy some Easter calories to help pass the time

Hi Lucie yes I think we did - possibly the of infertility board. I think now is be starting a "desperation of infertility" board. Although we're all going through heartache over this, it is great that many of us are here and not still on a yet-to-conceive-first-child board. Here's hoping for success second time around as well.

Genghis how you talk about the months ahead really brings back to me measuring everything in months (cycles) - "it won't be this month because I'm doing X and next month is Y, then the following month..." It messes with your head! I feel for you.

I think I'm crazy to be thinking all this already. Haven't mentioned to dh yet!

That's interesting snow we also did a natural fet this time with the chemical as my cycles have been back regular for a long time but next time I'm doing medicated as don't want to leave anything to chance with my hormone levels.

Ghenghis, yes that's right I remember now. I've started on the meds this cycle so we will be going for the transfer again after Easter. When I got my bfp with my daughter I did a fresh cycle back to back so figured there's no harm in doing the fet back to back so just going to get right back into it. I am worried though as I know I'm going to take it really hard if this one doesn't work but then I've been there before I guess.

That's crazy about your dhs sa that's so long to wait for a really simple appointment. Could you maybe ask them to let you know if any cancellations come up? The waiting is so hard because it's always there in the back of our heads and I find myself subconsciously wishing time away which I really don't want to do anymore with my little girl. We have so many nice things planned this year I just want to enjoy them without all this rubbish in the back of my head all the time.

Pony, so sorry to hear about your beta. Take some time to yourself and then get planning your next round. I always found that helped.

Potatoes, yes it's great so many of us have made it this far. Really hoping we can all graduate off this board successfully too.

pony sorry to hear about your negative beta. Take care of yourself lovely - it really sucks.

lucie interesting that you did natural this time too. I must say that I don’t really understand how a medicated fet works when you’re ov-ing naturally - it’s one of my questions. I did have my hormone levels checked the day before ov and the doctor said they were all fine so will be interesting to find out. And my period has started today (albeit in a weird way - lots of cramping but a little bit of brown blood only) so let’s see what happens there - might be a clue!

genghis, potatoes - yes to the infertility fog. Constantly second guessing what you’ll be doing weeks and months into the future - ugh. genghis that’s ridiculous about your SA - could you get it done privately to expedite it?

Am really glad this thread is here - I don’t feel like I necessarily belong on threads with ivf/infertility newbies anymore but it’s so good to have a group going through the same things.

I'm really sorry pony

Snow, the estrogen which you start on day 2 stops your follicles from growing meaning you don't ovulate naturally. The estrogen tablets are what causes your lining to thicken and then when it's thick enough you begin the progesterone which is what happens when you ovulate naturally...progesterone rises. This is the standard protocol my clinic uses and the doctor said he would rather I do it this way next time. Glad af has arrived and you can move on. Mine was a lot lighter than I was expecting with a chemical.

So glad also that this thread is here, good to find others that are going through this. One other thing that annoys me about all this for number 2 is that I feel I need to rush into this if I want any more children. We spent so long ttc no 1 that time is now short (40 this year) so feel have to get on with it! Gengis feel fed up with ttc naturally already. Have period today (AGAIN) and just so longing for the day when my whole life isnt dictated by my menstrual cycle. Feel like I don't know what I'll do with my time without this to take over everything!!

I'm the same Jen I'm 39 this summer so feel like time is not on my side. Really don't want to have to start fresh cycles again.

So I've got lining scan next Wednesday and if that is ok intralipids on Thursday. Wasn't going to tell anyone at all this time but think I need you girls on my side. I go back to work in a couple of weeks and was really hoping to be pregnant by the time I went back

Oh good luck! Did you have intralipids last time? I had steroids on successful IVF as I have Hashimotos.

Our appointment is in a couple of weeks to talk about starting FET process. Annoyingly, my clinic seems to do down regulation as part of process, not sure even why...Anyone else?

No i don't do down reg just the estrogen which is supposed to stop ovulation. I didn't do intralipids on my first fet but I have used it before but not on my successful round with my daughter either. I'm not convinced that I need it or that it does anything but if I don't do it and it's a bfn or another chemical then I guess I will only wonder and kick myself for not trying it.

I did aspirin, steroids, clexane and progesterone on first fet. What dose of steroids were you on Jen?

Ah thanks lucie. So you just switch off ov. That makes sense. So if I wanted to do a medicated fet I’ll have to wait a cycle anyway as won’t see th doctor until too late to start oestrogen. Gosh you’re brave going back to work pregnant! I think I would have been fired on the spot if I’d done that! -absolute twat of a boss where I work-

Haha yes I would have liked to but not going to happen now. They can't fire you for being pregnant. I know what you mean though I wouldn't have been looking forward to telling them but then every other woman there has probably had at least 2 lots of maternity leave so I would have just been having mine closer together but I'm older and don't have time to spread it out unfortunately.

Yes the estrogen switches off your natural cycle so that your clinic can control it all. My doctor told me no difference in success rates between natural and medicated but I think both he and I feel a little more comfortable with medicated as you don't have to time ovulation and know that estrogen levels are right before and after transfer. For my successful bfp I was on estrogen throughout my cycle even though it was a fresh so makes sense to give it a try.

In relation to your cycle yes you would have to wait until the next one anyway as you need to begin the estrogen on day 2.

Hmmm. Let’s see.

Yes I know they can’t technically fire you for being pregnant but I work in such a spectacularly unfriendly place they might just try. But I felt I had to go back to work early as a result too!

My period is also quite light, which I wasn’t expecting. Seems anticlimactic somehow.