Trying to conceive baby#2 following ivf treatment for #1

[lucieloos]

I thought I would start this thread as I can't see anything similar. We underwent many rounds of icsi and following a couple of bfns, and an ectopic pregnancy we were finally blessed with our beautiful daughter last year.

We recently started thinking about baby no 2 and had 4 frozen embryos of which 2 had been tested and found to be chromosomally normal so are meant to have a better chance. We didnt have the other 2 tested.

A couple of weeks back we had our first fet with one of the tested embryos and got a bfp super early at 4dp5dt. Sadly by 8dpt the line was barely visible and resulted in a chemical pregnancy. I've been feeling really down about it as this was meant to be a super duper embryo with no genetic problems which they said was the main reason embryos fail.

I thought it would be easier trying for #2 and of course it is in a way as I realise how lucky I am to have had a baby but I can feel the infertility fog starting to descend again as I realise although I've had a brief respite I will never be like my fertile friends and I do really want another baby and a sibling for my little girl.

Im feeling a bit negative at the moment. We will probably go back for the other tested embryo in the near future but I can't see how I would ever get lucky enough to get 2 bfps in a row. These things just don't happen to me so just not too hopeful about it at all. We said that if we used all of our frosties with no success we would be happy with what we have but already I am thinking should I do more fresh cycles. I will be 39 soon though so time isn't on my side for that.

Anyway just wondering if anyone else is in a similar situation and would like to share the journey. Please come and say hi.

Wow 2 hours they must have had it on really slow! Had another lot today and took 30 mins. I agree it is nice to have that bit of time out though to just chill and do nothing. Wishing you lots of luck for tomorrow. Keep us posted x

I know I was surprised! Had to reschedule a few work meetings as was expecting it to take 45mins or so. Will keep you posted re tomorrow but sure it will all go fine - proof will be 5-6 days later!

All done. One hatching blast on board. Now just to wait!

The 2ww snow! Everything crossed...

I just hopped on here for a rant. Just been ranting to husband who is probably fed up with listening to me now! All down to ten years younger SIL and her quick conception. I really thought that I had put all these feelings of jealousy behind me but they have reared their ugly head once again. Jealous because:

-the amount of effort, admin, googling, vitamin taking, dieting, researching. Imagine not having that!

-the excitement about pregnancy. I feel I was robbed of that due to everything we went through. My pregnancy was fraught with worries and anxiety due to infertility and the fact that I couldn't trust my body.

-age, feeling so old and wishing so badly that we had got pregnant when we first started trying.

Just jealous! And those old feelings of guilt about feeling jealous when my SIL is a gorgeous person, very kind and loves kids (is an early years teacher.)

I wonder if these feelings will go even DH and I get our second baby? I am sure I will need some therapy once this phase of my life (TTC phase) is over and done with!

Sorry for the rant!

In other news, cycle on hold for thyroid to stabilise but hopefully only by one month. Fingers crossed my levels stabilise 😬😬

Lucie good luck tomorrow!

Congratulations on being PUPO.

I hear you @Jenbot78. It makes me mad too. After I had DS I was ok with others having babies so I think when you get DC2 you'll feel better. The feelings will be there but in the background and not so raw.

Hi Ladies - new here. Reading your stories is both encouraging and heartbreaking. I hope it works out for you all.

My story is similar, DS is 10 months old, result of IVF, and my DH is finally ready to start trying again. I was ready 7 months ago, but had to let my partner process it all as well. I’m 40 and only had 1 egg and 4 eggs mature from the first two stim cycles that resulted in my son - and I was 38 then. Dreading going into this process with anything remotely resembling optimism as I know my chances are tiny and I’ll be crushed if I get my hopes too high. I wish I could enjoy the excitement of the possibility as well, but I just can’t let myself think positively.

Welcome @Floranse

Hi floranse - welcome, and wishing you all th very best of luck. It’s horrible that any of us have to go through this.

jenbot I don’t think my jealousy of easy/quick conceptions will ever go away. Even when I was in the first flush of newborn love with my son, I still found myself getting really bitter and angry with the honeymoon conceivers/“it happened it’s time!”/accidental pregnancies. The fear and panic of never having a baby has receded (whilst I’m frustrated about no 2 I don’t feel quite so viscerally sad about it) but I don’t think the jealousy ever will!

lucie sending good vibes your way for tomorrow.

Snow, big congrats on pupo! Mine was also a hatching blast. Hope the 2ww doesn't drive you too crazy. Will you test early again this time?

Floranse, welcome and wishing you lots of luck.

Jen, agreed it never really gets that much easier. Most of my friends are the type that get pregnant first try and can even plan which month they would like a baby so it's been pretty hard. I would say that even though I have a baby I also still get a little jealous when they conceive so quickly and with such little effort.

lucie id like to say I’m going to wait to test but am a hopeless early tester so I’ll probably go early. Am going to try to hold out to 7dpt but let’s see how I go.

Hope scan went really well today.

I was the same snow there was no way I would as going to be able to wait! Tested at 3dpt.

Had my scan this morning and all was good. One baby measuring just right and saw the little heart beat flickering ❤️ Such a relief.

Great news on your scan @lucieloos.

Fantastic news lucie. Thrilled for you!

Wahoo! Great news lucie 😀

Just popped on to say congratulations @lucieloos so glad all was well at the scan

I've had a really nice and relaxing weekend. First one in a long time.

Thanks everyone I won't plague you with constant details now as I know how hard it is when you are going through treatment etc but still sticking around to follow the rest of your journeys.

Cupcake, hope you are ok.

Twinkle, that's great youve had a good weekend!

lucie would love to hear more! And am hoping will be following you shortly.

Woke up feeling dizzy and nauseous today. Am hoping it’s a good sign, rather than a side effect of the cornucopia of drugs I’m on!

So after 2 days of feeling sick I cracked and tested tonight and got a faint but definite bfp. Better than a squinter but very early days. Am only 4dpt so wouldn’t expect a very strong line, but it’s a step in the right direction. Am still so fearful of another chemical but this cycle feels a lot more like the one that resulted in my son (early nausea, early faint positive tests) so am feeling more comfortable than last time when I didn’t see even a squinter until 6 or 7dpt. Hopefully this one sticks!

Eeek @Snowdayfet a cautious congratulations! I hope the line keeps getting stronger. I'm a early tester too, can never wait!

@lucieloos please keep us updated, I hope it all goes smoothly from now on

@twinkledag glad to hear you have been feeling a bit better. Have you got a start date yet?

I've been feeling low the past few days, nothing happened unfortunately after my medical management so I'm back for a scan on Friday. If nothing has happened by then I can have the medication again or maybe an ERPC. I'm hoping the ERPC will still be an option as I want this over with now as soon as possible

Eeekkk snow that's amazing news!! I really think this is it for you! Congratulations lovely.

Cupcakes, so sorry you're feeling down and it's all dragging on. It must be so hard for you. Really hope they manage to sort things soon.

That's fab @Snowdayfet . Congrats.

@lucieloos - thanks for starting this thread, it's been nice 

@NoCupcakesOrCocktails - not going to start until next month due to some life commitments. So sorry that it's dragging for you, that's so unfair

I really hope so! Keeping everything crossed now.

cupcakes am so sorry to hear things are dragging. Really hoping things are on the move but just taking time. Am sure an erpc will be available if you do need one. Big hugs.

I had my scratch yesterday. The procedure itself was fine but my nerves in the waiting room (with fullish bladder and a delay) weren't so fun. And it feels like a big scary step to really starting FET after all the waiting. I had cramping in the evening and felt very tired. I start buserelin on Sunday but baseline scan not until end of month. Hope it goes fast with all the other stuff I have planned.

Snow cautious congratulations when is official test date?