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Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

Original poster

Trying to conceive baby#2 following ivf treatment for #1

998 replies

lucieloos · 17/03/2018 18:34

I thought I would start this thread as I can't see anything similar. We underwent many rounds of icsi and following a couple of bfns, and an ectopic pregnancy we were finally blessed with our beautiful daughter last year.

We recently started thinking about baby no 2 and had 4 frozen embryos of which 2 had been tested and found to be chromosomally normal so are meant to have a better chance. We didnt have the other 2 tested.

A couple of weeks back we had our first fet with one of the tested embryos and got a bfp super early at 4dp5dt. Sadly by 8dpt the line was barely visible and resulted in a chemical pregnancy. I've been feeling really down about it as this was meant to be a super duper embryo with no genetic problems which they said was the main reason embryos fail.

I thought it would be easier trying for #2 and of course it is in a way as I realise how lucky I am to have had a baby but I can feel the infertility fog starting to descend again as I realise although I've had a brief respite I will never be like my fertile friends and I do really want another baby and a sibling for my little girl.

Im feeling a bit negative at the moment. We will probably go back for the other tested embryo in the near future but I can't see how I would ever get lucky enough to get 2 bfps in a row. These things just don't happen to me so just not too hopeful about it at all. We said that if we used all of our frosties with no success we would be happy with what we have but already I am thinking should I do more fresh cycles. I will be 39 soon though so time isn't on my side for that.

Anyway just wondering if anyone else is in a similar situation and would like to share the journey. Please come and say hi.

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Original poster
lucieloos · 09/04/2018 14:08

I'm so so sorry twinkle. This whole thing is so unfair. I know it's no consolation at the moment but at least the numbers have gone down on their own so you shouldn't need any further intervention. What did the clinic say? Sending big hugs Flowers

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twinkledag · 09/04/2018 14:10

I'm waiting to hear from them.

I can't believe I've gone from feeling so high to so low in the space of a week.

Does anyone know when the bleeding will start?

Original poster
lucieloos · 09/04/2018 14:11

Oh twinkle it's so awful ☹️ I think your numbers will need to get near to zero and then it should start so depends how quick they go down xx

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twinkledag · 09/04/2018 14:22

Ok thank you. Thanks

Snowdayfet · 09/04/2018 15:53

Oh no! I am so so sorry twinkle. You might need to stop the progesterone before the bleeding starts. My heart goes out to you - it is so so shit. Flowers

twinkledag · 09/04/2018 17:42

Thanks snowy.

I have been advised to stop all medication from today.

I am off work tomorrow and haven't been in today. Did anyone else go in during this?

It's the waiting that's so hard, I don't know when it's going to start or end.

When my FET failed it was really painful, I had to take time off work.

Original poster
lucieloos · 09/04/2018 17:51

I took a couple of days sick with my ectopic but I should have taken a lot longer but I hadn't told anyone at work about ivf or pregnancy and I didn't want to so at the time I thought it was for the best. I didn't take any time off for chemical but by now I am used to the disappointment. I would advise you to take some time off to deal with things emotionally more than anything if you can.

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twinkledag · 09/04/2018 17:55

I told my boss about the blood test results but not about the IVF.

I think I will know what to do once the bleeding starts. It's the unknown that's hard.

I'm still classed as a chemical pregnancy, right?

This stuff is so so hard, I'm sorry for you too@lucieloos. It's been nice to have people to talk to, I can't bear to answer questions from people who haven't been in our position.

Original poster
lucieloos · 09/04/2018 19:51

It is very hard twinkle. Make sure that you take the time that you need. It's good that you've told your boss and if I were you I would take the rest of the week off to process everything. Yes I guess it is still chemical / very early miscarriage.

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Snowdayfet · 09/04/2018 20:54

It’s so so hard twinkle. You should take as much time as you need. I didn’t take time off but I knew by the time of my beta it hadn’t worked as my tests weren’t getting darker so it wasn’t a shock for me. I would definitely class your situation as an early miscarriage. Look after yourself - it is such a shit time. Big hugs xxx

twinkledag · 09/04/2018 21:08

Thank you. I'm not planning on going to work for the rest of the week, I may work from home if I feel up to it.

Snowdayfet · 09/04/2018 21:25

Good idea. Stay snuggled up and tell the world to eff off. Flowers

twinkledag · 09/04/2018 22:30

About to go to bed. Feel so gutted I'm not going to be doing my nightly meds routine, I'd got so used to it, felt so productive.

Original poster
lucieloos · 09/04/2018 22:35

Aww I know twinkle it's so hard and you can't help but get your hopes up and think about what might be. I was the same last month. Give yourself some time and then think about planning again. You still have a couple of nice frosties out there? Hope you get some sleep tonight.

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Snowdayfet · 10/04/2018 07:12

Aw twinkle it’s so hard not to dwell on it. But lucie is right you just need to let yourself grieve for as long as you need and then get planning again and look to the future.

twinkledag · 10/04/2018 10:28

Thank you both.

We will go back for the FET in June. So scared as this is our last chance. DS starts school in September so I won't be able to take him out for 2 weeks to do another cycle abroad.

Original poster
lucieloos · 10/04/2018 10:33

Would you be able to fit another fresh cycle in before September or what about doing a fresh cycle in June to try and bank up some more blasts so you can do a couple more fets later in the year? That's what I did before I had my daughter so that we had some ready to try for number 2. It was hard delaying things but hopefully has worked out for the best.

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twinkledag · 10/04/2018 11:06

It's the money side of it, we are absolutely drowning in debt.

I don't think DH wants me to go through it all all over again.

This is so hard and so shit!

Original poster
lucieloos · 10/04/2018 11:26

Yes the money side is hard. I'm dreading how many more tries we will need as my credit card is increasing by the day.

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twinkledag · 10/04/2018 11:37

Mine is increasing by the hour! Grin

How do you think your FET has gone? Any symptoms?

Original poster
lucieloos · 10/04/2018 11:57

I've had af type cramping on and off most days. It's so hard to tell though and I'm just terrified of another chemical if I did get a positive ☹️

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twinkledag · 10/04/2018 12:21

When do you test?

Snowdayfet · 10/04/2018 12:27

Ugh the money is horrendous! Luckily I have a lot of savings but it’s still just like tipping money into an enormous black hole.

lucie that does sound positive. Really really hoping you’re lucky this time!

Original poster
lucieloos · 10/04/2018 12:34

I'm not sure yet twinkle. My doctor wants me to test on Monday as if it's positive I will need more intralipids Monday but I am an earlier tester so may do it earlier than that depending on symptoms and how I feel.

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Original poster
lucieloos · 10/04/2018 12:34

Thanks snow. Keeping everything crossed. Just dreading another chemical though if I do get a positive.

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