4 high quality embryos at day 3 - what should I expect at day 5?

[Goodluckjonathan76]

Mid way through our first cycle of IVF. They retrieved 6 eggs and 4 fertilised. The embryologist called me on day 3 and said all 4 embryos were high quality (at least 10 cells and minimal fragmentation) and so they could keep them until day 5 or 6. I am due an update tomorrow am and probably ET tomorrow afternoon or Friday (day 5 or 6) and just trying to set my expectations for the news tomorrow. How many usually die between day 3 and 5? If we do have at least one left, what are my chances of it sticking? I've gotten so pessimistic that I've sort of ruled out it working. Should I assume it's not doing to work or should I be more hopeful?

Oh and is everyone still testing? I haven't tested for a week now but replenished my stock of clearblue digital and boots cheapies today (Boots were doing a 3 for 2 offer) and will test again tomorrow. Hoping it it still 3+ or ideally 3-4. How far up does it measure??

And JoJo, DH and I worked out that DH (nearly 48!) will be retiring when this child goes to university! And I will be 50 when my child is 9! Having said that, there are lots of kids in DCs class who are older. I know at least 2 who are 50 and several in their mid to late 40s so it's really not that uncommon. Think this will be our last. In fact, DH was saying, we must use contraception after this one is born as it's sod's law we would get pregnant naturally! You are super fertile just after you give birth!

goodluckjonathan good to hear from you and good luck for your scan on the 14th. Mine isn't till the 21st and it feels like forever away. I've decided to only test twice a week. Not much point doing more and probably won't help the anxiety. I'm like you in thinking surely there would be bleeding if something went wrong but sometimes it can be delayed.

How many DC's do you have? I'm going to be an ancient mum and hope by the time mine goes to school I won't be the oldest mum there. I'm 39 now so will be 50 when mine is 11!

jojo thanks for the reassurance and info re beta hcg. I think I'll just stick to twice a week hpt until my scan. I have to keep reminding myself that I can't change the genetics of the embryo now and if something is going to happen then it will. I'm hoping to get some symptoms just so I know for sure but equally I'll probably suffer terribly and wonder why I wished it in the first place!

Hi Otters

Glad you're holding up well! Good to keep the anxiety at bay. I find that keeping busy helps massively.

You really won't be that ancient. Lots of older parents about. My main reservations are that I already have 2 boys so the novelty is wearing off! I kind of feel like I am going back in time!!! I am sure I will get used to it if all goes well and even get excited about it. It actually hit me again last night that it has really happened and I felt so happy. Bit by bit I guess.

I tested again this morning and got 3 weeks + again - I googled it and think/hope that the test doesn't go beyond that. Does anyone know for sure? I also changed my scan to next Mondat - decided I was being superstitious re 13th and it would be nice to find out a day earlier.

Goodluck, two children in the indy sector and one in childcare will surely add up! Are you thinking of getting a nanny/nursery/SAHP?

I’m not that career minded so I think I’ll only work very part-time and busy myself with the childcare, cooking, the garden etc. I’ve just looked at my maternity pay and it’s pretty pathetic.

Otters and Twickerhun, have you thought much about it? Twickerhun, are you still on maternity leave or have you been back since having your little one?

Re the 7 week scan, it can tell you a bit. Obviously, if there’s no heartbeat, then that’s game over. But at 7 weeks exactly, the heartbeat needs to be 120+, 110-119 is a worry and under 110 if a massive worry. So the heart rate can be quite a strong predictor of how likely you are to get to the second trimester.

Is anyone else feeling fatter? My waist seems to have expanded. And I haven’t had any cravings, it’s been business as usual lifestyle-wise...

I’m pretty sure 3+ is the maximum. After then I think the numbers would be too variable to be reliable.

Goodluck you also asked about the purpose of the early scan. sadly I read about missed miscarriages to often on here so I want a scan to check it’s all developing in the right place and, if not, I’d like to know sooner rather than later. A missed miscarriage is my absolute worst nightmare.

I’d not worry about a scan on the 13th, better to see the baby ASAP and ideally hear it’s heart beat - which is the most amazing sound in the world given that our little ones are the size of a blueberry!

Goodluck, the test only goes to 3+ as even at that point there’s too much variation between women for it to be reliable. I think that at some point it might go to negative again- the hook effect. There could be so much hCG in your blood that’s it’s too much for the test to see and it’s negsitive

Jojo I’m definitely fatter, I think it’s bloating from the progesterone suppositories. It’s pretty horrible.

I’m terms of child care I’m back part time with my baby in nursery. I’m now not career minded, I was until infertility struck then I took a massive step back. I’m the long run we need me to stay in employment. I earn significantly more than DH. It’s fine for me to be part time for now but I couldn’t stop work. Child care in the south is so expensive it’s hard to know what’s the best option!!

Twickerhun, that’s hard when you’re the higher earner. My DH is by far the higher so kind of lucky for me staying at home. Having said that, he does feel the pressure of having to earn to keep the standard of living going, especially with more mouth to feed and me earning less.

I haven't dared weigh myself (I probably should so that I at least know the starting point) but definitely feel porky. I've replaced wine with cake. I remember reaching nearly 70 kilos when DS2 just before I gave birth (I am normally 57kilos!) Have warned DH that I will flatten him as he's only 66 kg!!

Thank god re clearblue and thanks for the warning that it can go negative - that would've given me a heart attack!

I didn't know the 7 week scan was so informative. Really looking forward to it now. Dare I ask, but what is a missed miscarriage?

JoJo, as for childcare, I am really not sure but there is no way that I can afford a nanny with 2 DSs at private school. I do have some money saved up and am hoping that DS2 may get into a grammar/selective school and/or that our local comp will improve drastically in the next 18 months and so will only need to pay school feed for one. My older son is a bit of a tricky character and I just don;t think will do well as the local comp and we are out of catchment for the better schools. DH is a lecturer so has a lot of flexibility so will probably be able to do childcare 50% of the time so we will maybe do nursery or a nanny share for the rest of the time. DS2 is only 7 so will need an after school nanny until he is 11 so there may be ways of doubling up. Either way, it's not going to be pretty financially!

Twickerhun, I am in the same boat and earn a lot more than DH. His salary wouldn't even coverage the mortgage. I had been daydreaming about taking a year off then realised over the weekend that it's just not possible. What will be amazing though is to be off for 6 months and to be able to collect DSs from school, look after them etc as I have never had that time with them. Conincidentally, our nanny is leaving at Christmas so I will probably just get a temp or au-pair until to cover until I go on maternity leave in June. What hours/days do you work?

JoJo, that's lovely that you can be at home and enjoy it without financial niggles.

I’ve replaced wine with cake too!

A missed miscarriage is where you don’t realise your baby is gone, no bleeding etc. Normally you know when things are wrong as you get cramping and bleeding, but not always.

Hope you can find a good temp child care provider. It’s great you’ll get 6 months with your child. I work Tuesday - Thursday full time hours 3 days a week. It’s a good balance

I can just afford 9 months off, including using access annual leave, but it will be financially tight

Hi all

I'm 4+6 today. Testing again tomorrow. Still zero symptoms. Have not thought as far as Mat leave etc. still getting my head round the fact that this worked first time! Trying not to scare myself by googling too much. Have read about so many sad stories and all the things that can go wrong. It's a miracle that anyone manages to have a baby really!!

jojo thanks for the info re 7 week scan - will definitely be asking what the heart rate is and desperately hoping it's >120!

twicker and jonathan I'm also the higher earner. Haven't worked out what we are going to do yet! Childcare everywhere is expensive. DH is very keen on SPL - we need to sit down and work out our finances and what we are going to do. Not sure how much time I can get if we're sharing.

Counting down to scan date which seems an eternity away!

Oh wow, Ladies! You're all so successful! I'm happy about having the choice to stay at home but other worries instead. DH is normally our of the house for 12.5-16h a day. Some weeks he's so busy that I literally need to book a date with him to spend some time together. So my worry is that I might feel like a single parent when he's never around :(

I'm just organising a baby shower for a friend on Sunday. I hope it's good news for us at the scan on Friday or it could be one miserable weekend :D

jojo that sounds tough. I'm not sure how it's going to work out with us either. DH is out for about 14-16h a day as well mainly due to a 4 hour round trip commute! Hence thinking it makes sense if we both go part time so one of us is always around. Good luck for your scan on Friday! Anyone else having a baby shower for themselves?

5weeks today and strong lines on ic. Yay!! Might be imagining symptoms slight reflux and burping. How's everyone else doing ? Twicker and jonathan?

I’ve got the sickness :( threw up yesterday and feel crap today.

Twickerhun, that’s a good sign Even if very unpleasant.

Otters, your DH’s commute sounds insane! 2h each way is a very long way to travel. Do you live somewhere quite remote?

2 sleeps till the scan for us. I told DH to have enough time off to process the news after the scan, whichever way it goes.

Yes, sounds positive Twickers. I don't feel sick at all. Hoping I stay that way!

Twickers/JoJo, how are you feeling about the scans? Can we work on the basis that there is a very good (70/80% chance) that everything will look fine? Does anyone know the stats here?

twicker how are you feeling ? As jojo said it's a good sign even though it's unpleasant !

Good luck for your scan jojo the commute for DH is a killer. We're not too remote but it's having to catch the connections and a 30 min walk on each side

goodluckjonathan is your scan in mon? How about you twicker

Test lines are much stronger today which is a relief. Some cramps and twinges. Can't wait for the scan.

Is everyone based in/around London?

Good to hear re the test lines Otters. I did a Boots cheapie on Monday along with my Clearblue digital and lovely strong dark line there. I am sure that my tummy is rounder and harder too - anyone else have this?

And yes, scan is Monday lunchtime. Have a packed weekend so not long to wait. When is yours?

My scan is tomorrow morning. Goodluck, from reading all the various stats, I reckon there’s defo a good chance of things being ok. After an excellent 7 week scan, the chance can go up to as much as 95%.

Yes, we’re in London (zone 5 in the South). Otters, that’s quite a walk to the station. Our nearest station is 8mins away but DH walks to the one15mins away and still whinges - especially as it’s uphill on the way back

Has anyone else got weird food aversions? I’ve become very picky and it’s hard work to keep it balanced.

Hurrah for stronger lines! My tummy is definitely rounded but not harder, I assumed it was progesterone side effects? But I might be wrong!!

I’m in the south of England about an hour and a half from London.

Jojo no aversions but I’m craving salt. I want to add it to everything.