3rd or more time lucky - IVF cycle buddies October

[Hobbes39]

Hi Just wondering of there are folks on here who are about to go through their 3rd + time of IVF who want a cycle buddy? I dont mean it badly towards anyone who is starting their IVF journey for the first time, (i was there just this time last year after all) but I feel a bit like I cant be as optomistic about it as I was, so dont want to drag any first timers down? Hope that makes sense!
Anyway, just to explain about me:
TTC #2 for over 2.5 years now
Unexplained Secondary Infertility (have 4 year old DS)
Age 40.5
AMH: 15.4
2 failed fresh and 1 falied FET (with single frozen 3BB embryo we got from 2nd fresh round)
about to start 3rd fresh round when my period starts in approx 7-10 days, so will probably be late october EC.
anyone else a bit jaded, but still vaguely hopeful want to join me?
xx

Thanks very much gee

Thanks guys - I'm on my way in for the scan shortly. Feeling v nervous particularly as my DH won't be there as he's looking after DS.
That's great news you are started again Gee - will have everything crossed for you! X

I'm now hanging about he hospital awaiting a further scan as they are still unsure whether it's the other embryo next to my ovary or not. I'm also in bits as on this scanner they couldn't see a heartbeat, when on the other one 4 days ago, the doc had thought there was a flicker. This ain't looking good at the moment as I'm stuck in limbo land. Just feel utterly depressed.

Hope everything is ok hobbes thinking of you x

Oh god @Hobbes39 how stressful for you. With everything so very tiny it must be so hard to work it what is where or to pick up such a tiny heartbeat. Thinking of you and your DH. I do so hope it's good news.

It's not good. Need to wait and see at scan on Monday, but no one this morning could see a foetal pole or heartbeat, and at 6w4d there should be at least the pole. I'm so broken by this I don't actually care about the other part (which the docs are all concerned about) which is that they still any conclusively tell what is going on on my right ovary. I am to watch out for pain and go straight in if I have any bleeding as they are worried about ectopic. I kept telling them that I don't really care about that, what's going on with the one in the right place and they basically said "we would expect to see more than we are at this stage". I'm so heartbroken. X

I am so sorry. Just a lurker but I was where you are (IVF try 3 and BFP then problems) and it's so hard and so unfair. Thinking of you.

Nothing I can say @Hobbes39 except how very sorry I am it wasn't better news conclusively. Extra tight cuddles for DS from you tonight I'm sure xxx

I'm so sorry to read that hobbes no words from us can help you but am thinking of you loads xx

Oh God, hobbes - I don’t know what to say other than I’m so sorry you’re going through this and I’m hoping against hope that it all works out ok. It’s all just so unfair - you’d think that having struggled to even get pregnant in the first place, we’d deserve a bit of luck and for things to go well when we actually get that BFP. Sending huge hugs xx

Good luck hobbes thinking of you x

Good luck today @Hobbes39 hope it's positive news and conclusive xx

Good luck today hobbes - so hoping for good news for you x

Thanks guys - was bad news. Embryo has grown slightly but still no fetal pole or heartbeat. I'm to go back for a final san next week and then will discuss options. At least the suspicious thing on ovary looks to be just a cyst tho. Good luck to you all - I will try to pop back to check how you are all doing, but might not be on so much for a bit as just need to try forget about it for now and hope nature takes its course quickly as don't want this hanging over xmas. X

Oh god I'm so sorry. Of course disappear from mumsnet for a bit if you need to. I dearly wish it had been different for you my original cycle buddy. Take care of yourself xx

Oh hobbes am so sorry - it’s so unfair. Take care of yourself and I hope 2018 will bring you more luck and happiness than 2017 has xx

hobbes I am so sorry to read this. So fucking unfair. Look after yourself and take time out for you and your dh together and extra snuggles with your ds tonight. Lots of love xxx

Thanks all - before I sign off for a while - DH and I discussed this last night - if we ever get this far again, I think I'm going to refuse to have an ultrasound before 7 weeks - having had about 10 people look at scans in the last week, it's too much - and clearly all totally inconclusive until 7 weeks anyway, so seems rather pointless. Just thought I'd mention it in case you guys get there and have the option... x

Great advice - thanks @Hobbes39

Really great advice hobbes - DH and I decided the same after our mmc - that week of waiting to find out whether the pregnancy was viable after the inconclusive scan at 6 weeks was horrific. Hope you and your DH are ok xx

Oh Hobbes I'm so sorry this has happened. Absolutely torturous with all the waiting.

Nothing I can say to improve things, I know, but I hope 2018 will bring better luck for you, me, and the rest of us who haven't been successful so far. X

hobbes so sorry to hear your bad news! Totally understand you taking some time off the boards. I was doing the same after my mmc, so missed your updates. Its so desperately unfair.

Thank you all for your kind messages - it truly is shit isn't it? I miscarried naturally a few days after stopping the progesterone I was on. I'm still technically fucking pregnant at the moment as my body seems to like to cling on to the last remaining tiny bits of HCG - so I need to go back in to hospital on the 27th for what I hope will finally be a negative HCG level. I'm booked in for our FET in Feb/ March - and considering whether to do a 'natural' rather than medicated transfer - I really don't think I want to down-reg - I just want them to put it back in at the right time and have progesterone support. Have any of you ladies done this? My last FET was a medicated cycle and my lining was much thinner than on fresh cycles and I suspect than it is on normal cycles (I get heavy periods, suggesting a thicker lining generally). I can't help but think that a thicker lining is my normal, so the thinner one I had on the prev FET wouldn't have been ideal..? Anyway, any thoughts you guys have let me know!
Hope you are all ok and I hope that those of you starting in 2018 have better luck than I have had so far - please keep me posted & thanks again for all your support xx

Hi hobbes, lovely to hear from you and I’m glad that the worst of the physical side of the mc is over - hope you’re doing ok emotionally too and that you get that negative hcg result on the 27th.

Both my FETs were natural and it was really easy. I just had to call on CD1 and book a scan for somewhere between CD2-CD5. Then had scans every few days until they were happy that my lining was thick enough and I had a dominant follicle that was near ovulation. Then I did a trigger shot and had the transfer 7 days later (I was transferring a day 5 blast so the transfer time mimics the number of days post-egg collection that the embryo was frozen - so a day 3 embryo would be transferred 5 days after the trigger shot). Oh - and I started taking cyclogest a few days after the trigger shot (3 days after I think).

I’m not sure why my clinic told me to do a natural rather than medicated FET - medicated wasn’t even mentioned - but I think natural is usually suggested if you have regular cycles (so they can roughly predict when you’ll ovulate) and you normally have a good lining (so you don’t need medication to build it).

Hope that helps - happy to answer any questions - sadly feeling like a bit of an expert on natural FETs!

Hi hobbes lovely to hear from you. No idea about FET’s i’m afraid but didn’t want to read and run. Did see your other thread and was going to say i’d been thinking about you but didn’t want you to think I was some
crazy stalker lady! Hope you are ok, and wish you all the luck in the world for your next transfer.
Hope everyone else is ok x