3rd or more time lucky - IVF cycle buddies October

[Hobbes39]

Hi Just wondering of there are folks on here who are about to go through their 3rd + time of IVF who want a cycle buddy? I dont mean it badly towards anyone who is starting their IVF journey for the first time, (i was there just this time last year after all) but I feel a bit like I cant be as optomistic about it as I was, so dont want to drag any first timers down? Hope that makes sense!
Anyway, just to explain about me:
TTC #2 for over 2.5 years now
Unexplained Secondary Infertility (have 4 year old DS)
Age 40.5
AMH: 15.4
2 failed fresh and 1 falied FET (with single frozen 3BB embryo we got from 2nd fresh round)
about to start 3rd fresh round when my period starts in approx 7-10 days, so will probably be late october EC.
anyone else a bit jaded, but still vaguely hopeful want to join me?
xx

How you feeling Lulah? X

Oh decaf I’m so sorry, as if you haven’t been through enough already.
lulah good luck for whenever you have decided to test over the w/e
hobbes hope you’re feeling ok with those precious embies on board.
Hope everyone else is ok

So sorry to hear that @Decafplease really feel for you. Hope you can find something nice to do over the weekend to take your mind off things.

Am OK thanks hobbes - how are you getting on? Have a feeling it hasn’t worked this time but am going to leave it till we get back on Sunday to find out for sure - no point in ruining the time with our friends! Hope everyone else is ok. X

Great will power @lulahbelle hope it's just the luck you need. Enjoy yourself!

I would like to join you Hobbes I too I am on my third attempt of donor ivf I have felt giving up at times as haven't had anyone to talk to about it that what I am going through I fly out to Spain couple of weeks for our third final attempt if you would like to talk more I am here for all problem shared and all that it's me that can't have children the natural way as people tell me and they don't understand why I am going down this avenue

Hi everyone - welcome coolchick - sorry you are also on your 3rd attempt - I hope this one is the lucky one!
Lulah - am thinking of you & praying it’s good news xx
How’s everyone else doing?
I’m trying to pretend that I’m not in TWW and distract myself, but I’ve had mild cramps since the transfer so ta tricky to forget! I don’t know if I want this week to quickly or not, as part of me does want it to, but the three part that is sure it will fail just wants to have hope for a bit longer.... next Saturday will be the most stressful as that when I expect I’d start bleeding if everything goes wrong - so need to distract myself on Friday!

Just had a call from a lovely nurse at the hospital - I wasn’t expecting to hear and was told to call on Monday, so was really sweet of her to call - we have a day 5 and a day 6 embryo frozen! Hurray! No idea of grade at the moment, but delighted

Congrats on the frosties hobbes - that’s fantastic news! Keeping my fingers crossed that this is your lucky cycle.

Welcome coolchick - hope it’s third time lucky for you.

Sadly it’s not third time lucky for us - BFN today which is gutting but not unexpected. So on to a new clinic and hopefully some help as to why we make apparently great embryos but can’t get them to stick.

Hope everyone is OK xx

Great news hobbes hope you’re ok.
Hello coolchick fingers crossed for you
lulah i’m So sorry. Take time for you and your oh. It really is so unfair xx

Lulah - I’m so sorry it’s so shit and frustrating xxx I hope they can give you some sort of answers. Sending hugs and love xx

lulah i'm so sorry, it's just not fair, sending you big hugs xx

hobbes congrats on your frosties thats great news. Fingers crossed you won't need to use them!

Hello coolchick hope this time is third time lucky for you!

Sorry @lulahbelle how will you select your next clinic? Is there anyone who specialises in great embryos that don't stick - we've had two cycles with the same so interested to hear your thoughts.

Hi coco and all yep hopefully third time lucky this is our last shot of it before we go on to adoption as it's expensive and we can't afford to keep doing the cycle process we had different donors each time i think if you ask for donor that is younger than thirty then they will take what you say on board positive thoughts to all xx

Oh lulah! I am so sorry! This situation is so shit.
hobbes great news on the frosties.
Welcome, coolchick sorry you find yourself here, hope you get your BFP this time.
AFM, had a nice weekend with DH, stayed away from all infertility/baby stuff, now preparing to head back to the hospital for my ERPC. Hopefully it actually gets done today.
Hope everyone else is ok, x

Glad you had a nice weekend decaf and hope all goes well today.

Thanks for all the kind words - onwards and upwards (hopefully) I guess.

We’ve decided to try ARGC gee - partly because of their success rates (even allowing for the statistical manipulation that they apparently carry out) and partly because they’re so thorough which, although expensive, means I hope they’ll identify any other problems that we may have. It’s going to take most of our savings I think, but if it doesn’t work there, I think I’ll feel like we’ve tried everything. I don’t think they specialise in people who get good but non-sticky embryos, but they’re very big on the immunes stuff - I know that there’s a lot of debate about this and no scientific proof it definitely works, but I’m kind of willing to try anything now! I’m going to ask about doing a sperm DNA fragmentation test as well as apparently this can be a cause of recurrent implantation failure and miscarriage and isn’t something you can see at the fertilisation and culture stage - you need to test the sperm for it.

Hope everyone else had a good weekend and that the tww is going ok for you hobbes - have my fingers crossed for you xx

lulah glad you are focusing on the next step. Stay strong.
gee the clinic i am at is comparable to ARGC for my age group. Definitely found they give a lot more progesterone- 4x tablets,
2x pessaries, 2x lubion inject every day and 1 lentogest injection every other day. Plus estrogen and heparin. When i was on NHS, i only got pessaries. Wherever you go next maybe ask for more progesterone? They also do a scratch in cycle before, and 3D-SIS scan to check for scars/adhesions. Finally i was also offered immunes and pre-implant genetic testing of embryos. Last 2 I refused as DH and i didnt believe in them, and we would rather save that money for another cycle. All of this adds up - we are burning through our savings! But i did get my first ever BFP, even if it stopped growing after a while.

Thanks that is so helpful. I'm in this funny place. I still have two frozen cycles with my nhs clinic which obviously I'm keen to use but equally I feel like they won't try anything I want to try and as a result I may be wasting time which at 35 is scary. They simply won't try more progesterone and say more than one "method" i.e. Injections vs pessaries will counteract each other which is simply not true going by the success stories I see all the time on here and fertility friends. I'm so frustrated and fed up working so hard to get what I am willing to pay for because the NHS don't "recommend" it and won't even let me pay for it. So anxious.

gee would your clinic let you add on stuff on a self funded basis? I,e actual cycle on free NHS basis, but self funded additional progesterone, endometrial scratch, etc? Having said that, i think now that its mostly chance. What we need is that one perfect normal sticky embryo.

Thinking of you today Decaf - I hope you get the op today and don’t have to go through more waiting x
Lulah - I’m so impressed with your focus on the next time - and can understand the ‘will try anything’ state of mind! If I thought it was logistically possible for us to try somewhere like ARGC then I think we would have, but we are too far away really. Good luck for the next stage x
Gee - despite being self funded cos I am at an NHS clinic I feel your pain too re the extras - I think this time I was lucky that I saw the lead consultant and he took pity on me, so prescribed the extra progesterone. To be honest if I were you, if they won’t entertain the idea this time I’d buy the progesterone separately (I assume that’s possible?) and TELL them you are using it and you need them to note that and ensure they are aware. I basically said to the lead consultant that I had some of the pessaries left over from my frozen cycle so I could use them, (I had prob a weeks worth) but that I didn’t want to use a drug without them being aware as obviously a weeks supply isn’t enough and I didn’t want a sudden drop. I think he realised I was desperate enough, hence prescribing me the one in the evening as well as the morning one. I know that it might make no difference whatsoever, but at least if it doesn’t work this time I won’t be left wondering ‘what if’. I hope you got through to them as I found it very frustrating too being told all the time that it wouldn’t make a difference - of course it can otherwise why would anyone ever be prescribed more?! Rrrrg. Xx

To be honest hobbes, if I don’t keep focussed on moving forwards, I’ll just curl up and cry my eyes out about it all - nurse just rang me to confirm the blood test I had this morning was negative and she was so sweet I nearly burst into tears in the office.

We’re not 100% decided on ARGC - going to go and see what they say and what the place is like and have a follow-up consultation at our current clinic and see what we think then.

If I get any useful info on implantation failure with good blasts, I’ll let you know gee.

Hope you did have the ERPC today decaf and that you’re not feeling too uncomfortable xx

Thanks @lulahbelle for thinking of me when you're in the pits yourself x

Thanks for thinking of me lulah & hobbes. Finally done. Feeling equally sad and relieved.
Thanks everyone for your support over the last few days!
Hope you are all doing ok. xxx

Morning decaf, hope you are doing ok this morning - I’m glad the op is done but can understand the mixed feelings you are having. X
How’s everyone else?
Lulah - hugs to you too - i watched a weepy film when last cycle didn’t work and let myself be the world’s most over emotional person watching a film..! Felt better tho.. so if you need a moment to wallow, I can recommend it! X

Well done for getting through it @Decafplease hope you're comfortable and slept ok.