Anyone starting IVF soon? Join me.

[Shellster52]

After 3 full failed IVF's last year, I am about to embark on my second last attempt. I started an IVF thread during my last IVF, and everyone got pregnant but me. So I swore I wouldn't do that again this time. But I find myself wanting to chat with people going through what I am, so I am starting the thread again. Join me as I seem to be a BFP magnet!

Emma, I haven't seen what day you are on, when is your testing day? Definitely keep taking your pessaries at least until testing day. Fingers crossed for you.

Shellster, does that mean your cycle has been stopped? Are you self funding? Are they not collecting your 3 mature follicles?

I did read up a bit on diet etc and ate a bit more protein, didn't drink and cut back on caffeine but I also asked at my clinic if there was anything I could be doing to help things and each time (different scanners, Drs etc) said 'I wish there were but generally no, it's down to your body'. So who knows. We have one on board and will have to see what happens.

I responded so well last time (but I was almost 4 years younger ) that our thoughts were let's save enough for a fresh and a frozen cycle and if course now there's no frosties! But we are still In the game for now So grow little bean grow xx

shellster how frustrating for you. Can they not collect the three mature ones you have? Have they suggested what you can do differently next time?

mini the wait begins! I'm tired if waiting already!

Emma I'm not surprised you don't feel like hanging out with your pregnant sister in law. You've just had some bad news....I think you're entitled to feel fed up and bitchy, at least for a few days!
Also, if I were in your situation (and I may well be in your situation on Saturday), I'd continue to take the pessaries if you have some spare. Perhaps you can go to your FS or GP for a definitive BFP/BFN opinion if it makes you feel better, especially given your mum's situation.

Shellster I'm not too sure how many follicles I had (I didn't really want to know, and they didn't tell me), but I do know it was a very low number. I only had 2 eggs at EC. Maybe it's better for you to cancel this cycle for financial/emotional reasons, but be assured that things can work out ok. I guess I'll know how well things worked (or not) on Saturday...eek.

Shellster, we're only eligible for one cycle on NHS; I'm not sure why possibly because I'm 34 and we've miscarried before, which shows that we can get pregnant? I took a pessary last night, but I started bleeding again around 7 this morning. Generally speaking I have SUPER HEAVY periods; I have to take medication to control it. I don't usually spot at all when I begin menstruating I just go from nothing to what a normal period should look like to flooding and I don't usually only bleed for a night and then stop for 24 hours so all of this has been very unusual. I did take a pessary last night, just in case, although part of me wonders if I shouldn't save them so I can at least take them during my in-between cycle to boost the chances of doing it naturally.

Are you going to have to start from scratch or are you continuing on FSH until you have more?

Mini, my test day was yesterday: two tests, both negative. Blerg.

Bluemoonday, if I hadn't started bleeding again, I would have insisted on having a scan or bloodwork done to confirm one way or another, but as I started again this morning, I think it's unlikely.

I'll tell you what, though. If they tell me that it failed because of my fibroids (which they refused to take out last year because they were fractionally too small) and that they now think the best course of action will be to remove them, I will be the embodiment of rage.

emma we only have one ivf on the nhs too, it depends on the area you live in. It's quite annoying though when sometimes people are entitled to three! I agree it will be so annoying if they say that about your fibroids. How are you feeling today?

Only one cycle on the NHS for us too (we live in Lambeth). Emma fully agree regarding fibroids...I had one removed from inside my uterus before we started this cycle. Apparently it's only ones on the inside that cause a problem. Anyway, hopefully it was nothing to do with that in your case.

Hi Happily, I'm incrementally better, thanks. It's so unfair this post code lottery, especially as the government promised all women 3 goes on the NHS in 2004.

Bluemoonday, when did you have it removed? How long between that operation and trying with IVF? Has your lining been able to grow over hte scar tissue? Sorry for all the questions, but I've never met anyone else in y/our position. Mine are in the wall of the uterus, but they have distorted the shape of it; there are three large ones that are pushing towards each other into the uterus cavity, even though they are actually in the wall, so my uterus looks a bit like a BMX bike track. They were too small to actually remove, when I last went in. They protrude 30% individually, and need to be 50% for the removal to be safe, but collectively they take up a lot more than 30% of the cavity.

The bleeding seems to be stopping again and I haven't had any period cramps since Sunday. Meanwhile, I'm still kind of nauseous and flu-y. I hope it's just exhaustion.

Emma, what an emotional time for you. So still no definite answer!

Nothing you can do but wait now Happily and Bluemoon - and cross everything.

I have found a research article that explains Aspirin inhibits follicle growth, so that explains why not many of my follicles responded. So now I am taking it in the lead up to my next IVF to get more follicles at day 2, but then stopping during IVF cycle. I just have to wait and see if that helps!

Emma I had my fibroid removed a month before I started down regging. It's a simple op - my fertility consultant did it - I was only in hospital for the day. He actually showed me a video afterwards (way TMI....I really don't need to see the inside of my womb, thanks!). He said there wouldn't be any scarring afterwards. He told me that he'd removed 25 (!!) fibroids from another patient before she started IVF. He obviously thinks it's really important.
Do you live in London? If you plan to pay for another cycle perhaps you could also use Mr Khalaf at Guy's Hospital. The fibroid removal op could be done on the NHS.

Also...I was convinced yesterday that my period had started. Cramps and a weird bubbling sensation, but no blood. Still no blood today. Not sure what is going on down there but I am using all my will power not to test early. The waiting game is really tough, I just want to know one way or another! Happily when is your test date?

Hi bluemoonday I think I will be able to get the fibroids removed on NHS -- they are ruinous to life quality (three days out of the month, but that's still three whole days when I could be NOT tied to the loo!). Do you know how big yours was? I'm really annoyed that they didn't remove the fibroids before treatment. I think I would have had a much higher chance, and by that I do indeed mean I think you have a great chance! A nice healthy womb and a strong little embryo. Try not to test, though; it won't be accurate until your body has flushed itself clear of the treatment hormones anyway, right?

Would I have to be referred all over again to switch to Guy's at this stage? I don't think I could stand to wait that long!

Happily, how is it so far? I've got my fingers crossed for you!

Shellster, I've started bleeding a bit again, but I went about 18 hours without, so who knows what's happening!

Test date is Wednesday 12th so a week to go!

I'm feeling ok, had some stabbing pains and yesterday a stitch on one side all day. I don't know if that's a good sign/bad sign or a sign from the progestrone! Going to try my best not to test early though! How is everyone else getting on?

Emma - if they do think it's because of the fibroids, I would get them removed and then kick up all kinds of hell about not having been advised to have them before the IVF. Have you asked for a copy of your PCT's IVF policy, or have you just been told what it is by your doctor? The reason I ask is that someone I know crawled all over their PCT's policy document, found a loophole and persuaded the PCT to give them another go.
Be strong, Bluemoon and Happily - the wait's the hardest bit!

Bluemoon and Happily, echoing the encouragements to be strong! Happily, have you had any exercise? I missed not being able to go for a swim or to yoga classes during the wait (the nurses said it was fine, but I really didn't feel up for it), but I did try to go for walks, even just round the block. Maybe that would help?

Purple, I have not asked, but I certainly will. And if it turns out they do think it's because of the fibroids, the fuss will be enormous. I will be livid and my partner is really good at measured calm fury in these situations.

We're actually looking at egg sharing as another option. It means a free IVF cycle, if only getting to use half of the collected eggs, and you help someone. Although the reduced cycle is a bit wary-making, we both like the idea of helping someone else if we can (MrGH will also donate, that's part of the bargain -- though obvs not to the same woman, because how mental would that be showing up on the doorstep in 18 years' time!).

My clinic said not too do any exercise and I have been missing it I've got to be honest!

Sounds great about the egg sharing, it's definitely something I would consider doing too!

When is your test date emma?

Emma I don't know how big the fibroid was to be honest - it was on the inside, and big enough to be 'of concern', so they removed it. Hopefully you can get yours removed soon.

Happily the waiting game is awful - I have 2 more sleeps! I'm trying to stay positive but I'm pretty sure it will be BFN for me. This is our first cycle and the odds aren't in our favour. My mum is driving me potty -trying to get me to test early - but I won't give in. Also, I really don't want to get a BFN then have to go to work for the rest of the day...I'd rather wait until Saturday.

Purple thanks for the encouragement. What I'd really like is a but that's off the cards at the moment! Shellster, did you have your EC yesterday? How did it go?

Oh and I also miss exercise - especially running. I feel like a bloated lump at the moment. That's one thing to look forward to at least.

Emma I have a friends in the US who 'shared'. He provided sperm to an anonymous woman in Colombia (!), who provided eggs. They now have a lovely baby girl who looks just like her dad (and not at all Colombian). It's worked out really well for them.

Sorry Shellster just remembered that you cancelled your cycle, so of course you didn't have EC yesterday. Apologies

2 more days!!! How exciting. Why don't you think it's worked? I've got an a really busy weekend just to keep my mind off it!

I'm been feeling pretty down in the dumps all week - PMS symptoms, bloating, imminent AF feeling!

Does anyone know how to predict AF date during/after IVF? I presume it messes up your cycle. I'm usually pretty regular, every 23 days. Last period was 2nd May (ie, 34 days ago). Obviously that would make me POAS under non-IVF circumstances. Can you still get a BFN if your period is 11 days late in IVF world?

Shellster - sorry, I was completely crap and failed to say anything about your news. How frustrating for you, yet again. Although I'm seriously hoping that you can beat the system and conceive naturally this month. xxx
Bluemoon - are you still taking the progesterone? That can delay a bleed, so yes, in theory it could be really late.

Emma - egg sharing sounds like a really positive thing to do. I'm too old for that kind of malarky - they don't want my eggs , but we have talked about donating any frosties left if we ever achieve a pregancy.

Now, this might sound like a bit of a funny thing to post on this forum, but given the emotional rollercoaster that is IVF, I think anything's fair game. So here goes.

Do any of you other ladies have waves of panic about whether or not this is the right thing to do? For me, although I really really wanted another baby, IVF was the last thing I ever wanted to do. I came round to the idea because DH really wanted to and I didn't think it was fair to refuse. And I'm glad we gave it a go, and we have our Frosty to try (starting down reg next week). We can give it one more whirl of the wheel with another fresh cycle after that, but that's probably us done if it doesn't work out.

But I keep finding myself wondering if we should. We've been TTC for five years now, and I'm 41. DS is six and a half and although he desperately wants a sibling, I can't help wondering if it would rock the apple cart.

And I don't know if this is me trying to put sandbags round my heart to protect myself against the statistally-probable final outcome of all this: that IVF is unsuccessful.

Just wondering if anyone else has these feelings sometimes?

xx

Thanks, everyone, for being so supportive about egg sharing! My mum is a bit unsure, but I think MrGH and I are going to go for it.

Bluemoonday, DON'T GIVE IN!!!! My mum was the opposite (she likes rules), but just tell her it won't be accurate until you reach the test date. I'm at a conference this weekend, but I'll have all my fingers and toes crossed for you. Are you still feeling like it's not going to happen? I've no idea what the average wait for AF is, but as I've been documenting mine has definitely not started yet in any way that I would recognise as 'normal'. Nonetheless, statistics demand someone gets it right the first time! I hope it's you!

Happily, our test date was on 2 June. I'm still debating whether I should test again -- no real period has started yet, and I've had enormous butterflies in my stomach for the last couple of days. It'll be a blinking miracle if it shows positive, but I can't understand why I'm not bleeding properly. The ACU said that it'll be really heavy and revolting (paraphrasing), but thus far it is completely abnormal insofar as it's light and intermittent (mine are usually heavy and revolting).

Shellster, I'm so sorry you cancelled the cycle. It's so hard to go through -- the the jabbing and poking, and the endless waves of emotion. I've got a good feeling about the next cycle, though. Fingers crossed.

Purplemegs, I really don't know. It's really tough to know if any of this is right. Regarding your son, if you guys don't get pregnant, he'll never know what he's missing, but one day he'll be grateful that you tried so hard. If you do, it will be tough for a few months, but then he'll have a little brother or sister who will adore him, and as they get older, a partner in crime, a conspirator, an amazing friend. Whatever happens will end up being right for your family. ('Sandbags around my heart' -- best description EVER. For months, if not years, yes.)

Emma what a fabulously upbeat person you are. Love this response . (Can't claim "Sandbagging hearts" as my own I'm afraid. I'm showing my Indie Roots....it's from a song by a band called The Family Cat that I was into when I was in my teens. Just came back to me when I was typing.) x

I'm having an endo scratch in the morning....not looking forward to that very much!

This can be our anthem

blue, don't want to be ignoring you but I really don't know the answer. So you're period is 11 days late making you at day 34? That sounds promising. Not long till you know for sure. I am so nervous - while I wait to start again, I am living through you guys.

Purple, you sound like you are at a bit of a crossroads with all this crap. I have moments where I tell myself I don't want to try anymore and tell myself I don't want to be stuck at home for years. But then when IVF fails I am so upset so obviously I really do want it. Maybe it's my minds way of protecting itself too.

Thanks for your good feeling about my next cycle Emma. I am trying to be practical about it all and just keep researching and doing things to improve my odds. At least I have found the reason for the poor response this cycle (Aspirin) so I have confidence it will work out better next round. And hopefully for you too! I am an Aussie and no egg share program here. How does that work? If you only have one day 5 embryo again, then it's yours and the cycle is still free?