Even if I agreed with you, which you know I don't, it's not government by the DM. It's culture. No laws have been revoked, no legislation tabled. Two people have lost their jobs, and it's likely that broadcasters will tighten their privacy compliance and watch for sexism as closely as they do for racism - for a while. Nothing more.
Lots and lots and lots of people found this offensive. Many thought it was simply the latest in a string of offensivenesses (me, of JR). Some of these people read the DM, some, like me, quite definitely do not. It doesn't matter. You cannot discount those feelings, Sophable, because they do not match your own.
I don't think that this is about shutting down any and all 'edgy' humour - I think it is about privacy and respect for individuals, and giving equal value to the humanities of everyone. It should still be perfectly possible to sail close to the wind in comedy - just not to tell the world when and where, you fucked a specific private individual.
In an organization of the size and power of the BBC there must be a buck-stopping point. It's very unfortunate that this time it was Lesley. I think that if the BBC had responded earlier and more effectively, it needn't have happened.