Did you read that article in the Guardian magazine about that woman who contacted all the men she'd slept with

[morningpaper]

HOW FECKING DEPRESSING WAS THAT?

Yes I sort of see what you mean Dittany. Though she seemed more honest than immature to me. As though she's constantly swinging between hope and foolishness, desire and self-hatred.

I find all that kind of thing quite interesting - it's quite familiar to me actually. There's something ugly about writing it down. I like that.

I couldn't read all of it, skimmed it towards the end. I think she needs to raise her expectations and look for someone she could admire/look up to/fall in love with. Not that it's any guarantee they will treat you well but none of them sound the least bit appealing. I would prefer abstination to that list of experiences.

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But why should they? They aren't self-help manuals. I think writing well - and that bit is important, because she does write well - about a complicated issue is quite justified, if justification need really to be sought.

You aint got no poetry in your soul dittany.

That's like saying: 'Oh fgs, why bother writing a poem about it Tennyson? Your friend died, end of, no need to go on about it' or like saying 'Gatsby didn't get the girl, get over it. Why write a book about it? Much simpler just to reduce everything down to two SENSIBLE sentences.'

It doesn't encourage anything anyway. I don't see that. As if women need bloody encouragement to feel full of self-hatred and loathing!

I don't mind that self-loathing find an outlet in a newspaper. I think it's quite interesting and ugly.

I'd prefer to promote self-loathing than self-satisfied posturing tbh (cf rest of the graun)

I haven't read the article yet but having read the thread thus far I can totally say I would have a lot of empathy with this woman and I'm sorry Dittany but to reduce certain behaviour as only acceptably applicable to just teenagers and young adults is frankly quite naive imo.

No, no ditt - she is expressing 'her' truth, or lack of. She's just writing well about being a bit of a fuck up really. I think that should be allowed.

Otherwise it'd all be Go Getting, Motivating, Hugely Endlessly Cheerful Pieces About Living Another Day and Being Slim and Never Getting Down and Always Eating Well.

And well, frankly, who needs that?

Room for all, as ds1's teacher once said to me, room for all.

I suppose the main thing I disagree with you on dittany, is that she isn't deluded or exploited I don't think.

Though, god knows, she's an uncomfortable presence. But perhaps that's what I like about it?

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I really didn't understand the point of it - and who on earth is she anyway?

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its coddy not cod

god i am a twat

lol @ call me dittany.

You are very censorious about her. I think she's got under your skin, like a big fat maggot eating away at some ghastly nerve cell you wished you forgotten about. And now, you want to crumple up the newspaper and fling it away, tutting to yourself about her impossible self-indulgence and morose ways.

How dare she write in a paper like that! Why isn't she more cheerful? Why wasn't there a happy ending? Why doesn't she wake up and smell the coffee, and try to behave like a good girl?

My favourite bit was when she tried to lie on top of the music shop owner in cornwall and he shoved her off. It was really painful that bit I thought.

Oh but isn't it all part of the self-loathing?

Me, me, me. Look at me! Best in class!

Aaaagh. I'm such a worthless fuck up. Fuck it.

I guess we just disagree in that I think it is okay to have this kind of angst in the paper, and you don't.

Its depressing because she doesnt seem to have any self-respect, or a life. Thats the impression she gives in the article, anyway.

Having now read the articleI can definatly identify with her on so many levels. I'm quite struck by her awareness and honesty. Certainly not sugar coated and completely agree with ahundredtime's posts!

erm
am i alone in my rebranding