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Scarlett Keeling

147 replies

lemonstartree · 11/03/2008 11:20

Anyone else give a litle gasp of horror when it was revealed that Scarlett was left by her mother, for 'several weeks' in Goa whilst mum went off with her new boyfriend and 5 of her 8 children ????

Am amazed no one else has posted this given the outcry wrt the McCanns!

OP posts:
grimupnorth · 11/03/2008 21:13

Oh for fucks sake will people stop judging the poor woman. Take off the judgeypants and stop pruriently parading your disapproval of a woman you presumably do not know. She has lost her daughter in the most horrific way. What good will it do to anyone for you to sit there telling the world how irresponsible she is? You can bet she would not have done what she did had she thought this would happen - hindsight is always perfect 20/20.

Some people lead lifestyles that may seem incomprehensible to you, and make decisions that you may consider irresponsible. But the mother will have been doing what she thought was best, and the blame lies with nobody other than the piece of scum who raped and murdered an innocent girl.

noddyholder · 11/03/2008 22:06

Debate is judgement and judgement is debate.Nothing would ever get done without it.FWIW I think she was negligent but still feel for her loss and she will have to live with that long after we have stopped 'judging'

WendyWeber · 11/03/2008 23:24

I've just found this quote from Scarlett's mother about the guide:

But this is the guy she left Scarlett with!!!

(NB quote is from the Sun, so they may have made it up...)

FairyMum · 12/03/2008 07:06

I see The Daily Hell is on the war path about this poor mother too.
I went interailling around Europe with friends at the age of 16.....

spicemonster · 12/03/2008 07:09

If Scarlett had been 16, she would have been able to travel alone. Would her mother have been culpable of neglect then?

PersephoneSnape · 12/03/2008 13:53

daily hell link

words fail me. that poor poor woman. I am seriously considering press complaints commission. that is just evil ambulance chasing journalism at it's worst.

TwoIfBySea · 12/03/2008 15:09

Neglect seems perfectly acceptable when you are seemingly "middle class" and that includes the bohemian element that this mother belongs to.

With enough money you can be forgiven anything.

As with the McCanns.

I don't stand in judgement (much) but as parents we are supposed to do everything we can to try and keep our children safe. Leaving a 15 year old in a place like that, well, how close were the friends she was left with?

When neglect is continually sidelined more and more people will do it and more and more kids will be put in the path of danger because of that. Such is my opinion, and it is only my opinion so if it gets anyones knickers in a twist then I am sorry you feel I shouldn't dare have one.

FAQ · 12/03/2008 15:11

TwoIfBySea - how many teenager girls (younger than 15!) go to sleepover at houses where the only way the parents are known is by meeting at the school gate?? Quite a lot I should imagine! And I don't think you can really say a friend that you only see at the school gate is a "close" friend,

expatinscotland · 12/03/2008 15:13

It's a very weird case.

I'm with cod, the mother seems a bit of a nut job.

expatinscotland · 12/03/2008 15:15

But she wasn't 16, spicemonster.

spicemonster · 12/03/2008 15:21

No she wasn't expat but she wasn't far off. And none of us know what kind of teenager she was. In retrospect it seems it was an error of judgement on her mother's part to leave her but, whatever the rights and wrongs, her beautiful daughter has died in a hideous way. Please leave her alone

expatinscotland · 12/03/2008 15:25

This is a public forum, spicemonster.

And you're passing just as much moral judgement on people who express their opinions on the matter, because they don't agree with yours, as they are.

expatinscotland · 12/03/2008 15:26

She left the kid alone in a foreign country.

And we're supposed to all just say, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, lady.'

No, I'm sorry, Scarlett, that your mother found her lifestyle too important to compromise by doing her utmost to look after your safety until you were old enough to do it for yourself.

expatinscotland · 12/03/2008 15:27

'Have met many like her while travelling who leave tehir kids willy nilly Age is irrelevant imho a child is a child '

I have, too, noddy.

And plenty who ditch their kids here in the UK with whomever will take them so they can have that all-important me time.

HuwEdwards · 12/03/2008 15:29

I agree completely with Wannabee

HuwEdwards · 12/03/2008 15:32

She was a very vulnerable young girl with it's reported, a history of drug abuse.
who'd never even been abroad.

Her mother's judgement and risk analysis was tragically lacking.

expatinscotland · 12/03/2008 15:34

It's like if someone drove drunk and their passenger was killed and then your said, 'Oh, poor drunk driver. I'm so sorry for your lapse of judgement. Everyone, lay off criticising him. He just made a mistake and person died as a result. I'm sure he's had enough.'

StripeyMama · 12/03/2008 15:36

I posted on the other thread about this and I still say the same. This is a tragedy for all those involved and I can see no point in having a judgefest over the mother.

Interesting comment in the Guardian about how mothers take the blame.

That Daily Hell link is sickening and ridiculous - the worst kind of judgemental muck-raking.

kiskideesameanoldmother · 12/03/2008 15:37

It is a tragic case and i try not to comment on them for there for the Grace of God.

This case doesn't surprise me. I haven't been to Goa but know the Caribbean/Guatemalan trail. It is scary to see young expat or tourist kids with the freedoms they sometimes have. These places always have a subculture of drugs which blossom because of the tourist trade and the bartenders turn a blind eye to the alcohol because they are 'white' kids and it is part of the expectation from what they have seen, in their limited worldview.

Local men see them as 'easy pickings' many times and one of the local saying was that they want to try black berry when they are out there. (one of the more polite phrases, anyway)

Not nice, not fair, but I wonder sometimes how much is blindness to the cultural clash or how much neglect on behalf of the parents who take their kids to these places.

southeastastra · 12/03/2008 15:40

what is the point of all this judging? it's awful and doesn't change the situation, there is only one person to blame the bloke who killed her.

Oliveoil · 12/03/2008 15:41

I fail to see what living in a caravan has to do with anything tbh

so they are benefits, so what? they have an 'alternative' lifestyle, so what? and why the comments in the DM are in the vein of 'oooooh and the children were so polite', well why shouldn't they be?

fgs

she was very lax however to leave her, but maybe she trusted the family she left them with, who knows

hindsight is a marvelous thing

spicemonster · 12/03/2008 15:41

Of course you're entitled to your opinion expat. I just find it reprehensible to villify a parent less than a month after their child was brutally murdered but that's your prerogative obviously.

And blaming her for Scarlett's murder is like blaming a woman for getting raped for wearing a short skirt IMO but I'll leave this thread now and let you get on with your blamefest.

StripeyMama · 12/03/2008 15:45

Oh Oliveoil, doncha know, you can't possibly bring up healthy happy good mannered children without a house a bath every night and two cars on the drive blah blah.

The Daily Hell is going to be like a pig in shit over it really - travellers, single mother, benefit claimants...

Oliveoil · 12/03/2008 15:47

yes it has it all

ooooooh look at their names, titter snigger etc etc

from what I have seen on the news (sky ) she is very articulate and together

more than I would be in the circs

leave the poor woman alone

noddyholder · 12/03/2008 16:36

Me time is a luxury once you have kids not a right.I was in Thailand for months and someone asked me to look after their daughter overnight while she 'partied'.I wasn't keen mainly because the child had chicken pox and In was terrified and eventually did catch it but she left her with me after knowing me less than 2 weeks adn came back 3 days later ! She had lived there about a year and was english.I was 22 at the time and totally dumbstruck