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Original poster

Ok, in light of baysmum's posting. Can we have a show of hands for deletion of threads.

194 replies

homemama · 06/05/2007 20:28

I can't believe I'm posting this as I don't actually agree with thread deletion other than in extreme circumstances. However, Baysmum has confirmed that Madeleine's mum is likely to be a Mnetter and if not then her close friends and family certainly are.

Whilst I would have no objection to them reading anything I have posted, I'm horrified to think that we (collectively) may cause the family any more distress either now or in the future.

Therefore, if most participants of the threads agree then perhaps MNHQ will agree also.
Thanks

OP posts:
AitchTwoOh · 06/05/2007 21:41

lol, yes. let's re-hold this completely bogus vote and get everyone to say whether they've actually read the threads in question. there were only two, weren't there?

i have. i vote no.

batters · 06/05/2007 21:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

scatterbrain · 06/05/2007 21:41

i have too - and I vote no

batters · 06/05/2007 21:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 06/05/2007 21:42

I have as well.

I vote no.

NKF · 06/05/2007 21:42

I'd say that by posting, we've already taken part in something that might cause pain. We can try to write as sensitively as possibly but it's presumptuous to think that our posts are the one shining examples of good feeling and empathy and every one else is rubbing salt into wounds.

AitchTwoOh · 06/05/2007 21:43

it woudl make me ashamed, homemama, if i thought i'd done anything to be ashamed of.
i can't take respionsibility for anyone else, and nor can you.
and better to 'take part' imo and stand up for what you feel is the sensitive and right thing with regards to this tragic situation, rather than stand back and watch as people behave like (imo) ghouls.

scatterbrain · 06/05/2007 21:44

Oh for Gods sake - does anyone really believe that the musings of a bunch of unknown people on the internet is really going to cause the Mccanns any nmore pain than they already have !

Somehow I think they have bigger fish to fry !

AitchTwoOh · 06/05/2007 21:45

batters, i wasn't aiming it at you at all. i reckon loads of people havne't read them.

lyrabelacqua · 06/05/2007 21:45

Completely leaving aside the whole freedom of speech thing, i honestly believe that it could cause the family/friends more pain to see the thread was deleted because it was so 'shocking' than to read what people actually posted because the vast majority were supportive.
So I vote no too.

lucy5 · 06/05/2007 21:46

I have read them and say no to deletion.

littlelapin · 06/05/2007 21:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

glassslipper · 06/05/2007 21:46

Fair enough batters. But I interpreted your comment as support for deletion.

And that is one of the big issues of an internet forum really - interpretation. The written word can be taken many different ways and is often interpreted by an individual with a bias toward their own feelings, knowledge & experiences.

CaptainUnderpants · 06/05/2007 21:47

It is truely an awful situation that is going on abroad at the moment but if we delete to spare the parents feelings where do we draw the line ?

Who knows who is and isn't a MN ?

Any story that breaks in the news may involve a member of our families and things will get said rightly or wrongly if discussed on a public forum.

If it is deleted then I feel that it sets a precident .

I have read the threads now ( as best I could ) and although some postings may have been thoughtless I have seen alot worse on MN.

I vote ' NO' although I do see little point in a vote as obvioculy not all members of MN will see this and it is up to MN towers to make the desciosn and they are intelligent enough to come to a descision without our input.

mrsharrypotter · 06/05/2007 21:49

Delete it. Please.

Original poster
homemama · 06/05/2007 21:53

I'm actually sat here crying. Not for the child because firstly because we don't know that anything has happened to her yet and secondly because she is not my child to grieve for.

I'm crying because DH has just logged onto a business forum that he uses for work and the comments on their chat board have made me despair of human compassion.

So I hold my hands up here and say that the comments on here have been mild by comparison to the vile posts elsewhere.

I still don't see however, why she should have to face them in the name of free speech.

OP posts:
dolally · 06/05/2007 21:56

delete please.

NKF · 06/05/2007 22:01

What happens when threads get deleted? Are there lots of posts alluding to the deleted thread and then more deletions. Or does everyone who wants to talk about it just find another site?

AitchTwoOh · 06/05/2007 22:01

you're all forgetting to say whether you've actually read the threads...

homemama, if what you say is true then it would feel really sinister if Mrs McCann came 'home' to MN and the threads were deleted.

of course, i'm buying into the thinking that she'd give a fuck either way, i suppose...

personally i think she'll have more on her mind if the wee girl doesn't come home and if she does she'll not care.

anyway, LL's right, it's not a democracy. report what you need to report, provide your reasons (better if you've read them, imho) and let MNHQ do what they think is right.

CaptainUnderpants · 06/05/2007 22:03

Interestingly enough I just had a look at another forum ( not parenting site ) where they were discussing the abduction and their were afew comments that no doubt the parents would have found upsetting . The moderator of the forum pulled the thread and ask pople to stop posting in respect for the girls parents.

It didn't appear that anything was deleted but they just asked for some respect for parents and not to post anymore.

FrannyandZooey · 06/05/2007 22:03

I vote no.

NuttyMuffins · 06/05/2007 22:04

Yes

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 06/05/2007 22:05

You know what I find this notion that one thread on one website will worsen a family?s pain and suffering strange and a bit arrogant tbh. Yes lots of people rely on mn for support, but mumsnet really does not wield the kind of influence that some on here seem to think it does. To most, mn is a website, nothing more. And to people who don?t post here, the idea of getting your support from a bunch of strangers on the internet is, quite frankly, incomprehensible.

And do you not think this family have better things to do than to trawl through the 1100 or so posts to find the 10 or so that might upset them? get real.

mamazon · 06/05/2007 22:06

I seriously doubt that any parent spending most of her energy wrroeid sick about where her chidl is and what is happening to her would think to come onot Mn for a quick chat.

I also agree with some of the things said in the other thread.

BUT i also know how deeply it hurt Sara Payne when she read letters written to newspapers and things that had been placed on internet forums like this, months after Sarah's body was found.

I don't think the threads should be deleted but i do feel people should not post judgments or opinions on the parenting styles of two people who are desperatly worried for their daughter.

glassslipper · 06/05/2007 22:07

wannabe - havent 'met' you before but agree with everything youve said thusfar.