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Original poster

Ok, in light of baysmum's posting. Can we have a show of hands for deletion of threads.

194 replies

homemama · 06/05/2007 20:28

I can't believe I'm posting this as I don't actually agree with thread deletion other than in extreme circumstances. However, Baysmum has confirmed that Madeleine's mum is likely to be a Mnetter and if not then her close friends and family certainly are.

Whilst I would have no objection to them reading anything I have posted, I'm horrified to think that we (collectively) may cause the family any more distress either now or in the future.

Therefore, if most participants of the threads agree then perhaps MNHQ will agree also.
Thanks

OP posts:
ravenAK · 06/05/2007 20:50

I agree with lyrabelacqua - don't delete.

Better for the family/friends to see the vast, vast majority of posts are wholly supportive than to imagine what stupid things might've been said, if the threads are deleted.

Original poster
homemama · 06/05/2007 20:50

But they can see the overwhelming support they've had from the 'prayer and best wishes' thread.

I HATE censorship! I have never before sought it for anything even when I have vehemently disagreed with the POV. But why would any of us want those parents to see that.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 06/05/2007 20:50

My sister is a journalist. Whilst she doesn't see it in terms of money she can make for her boss, she does see it in terms of: if my sub-editor is continually displeased with what I write, I will soon be out of a job.

tortoiseSHELL · 06/05/2007 20:51

I do think those thread should be deleted. They don't really serve any purpose anyway, there's not much information on them, just lots of arguing, some news updates and lots of sadness.

CaptainUnderpants · 06/05/2007 20:52

I haven't read all the threads so dont know what postings have been offensive or upsetting . But if they are deleted and the child parents know that they had been delted they may wonder and think 'What exactly has been written about me ?' leading to more turmoil and anxiety.

Also if deleted it will never stop the hurt that they are feeling now and it will not make it any better.

If they dont read things on this site then they will read it on other websites , whether parenting sites or news sites .

I would imagine that alot of people have given support on the 'wanted deleted ' threads aswell.

The parents are intelligent enouh to know what a forum lik ethis can throw up, but knowing that something has been said about you and not being able to find out what is even wrong, whether supportive or offensive.

NKF · 06/05/2007 20:52

To see what Homemama?
I can think of things I would hate to see on this site if I were the parents. But it may not be the same things another person dislikes.

fairyjay · 06/05/2007 20:52

My vote's to delete.

lyrabelacqua · 06/05/2007 20:53

I'm a sub-editor myself and I also don't look at stories in terms of making money for the boss. The money-makers have little to do with the day-to-day stories.

expatinscotland · 06/05/2007 20:53

A lot of threads on here serve absolutely no purpose in the grand scheme of things.

And there have been many which greatly offended certain members.

Enough to make some of them leave.

But they were not pulled.

They are not libellous.

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 06/05/2007 20:53

maybe we should delete the news section altogether then. and the breast/bottlefeeding section. and the weening section. and the food section. you know, just in case someone posts something that might offend someone who has been through a nasty experience and might feel upset if they read them .... oh wait we're running out of sections now!

if this family sell their story to the media, and chances are that they will, they will need to answer the question "so why did you feel it was appropriate to leave your children unsupervised while you went for dinner". because it will be asked.

if they don't read comments here they will read them somewhere else, and believe me there is far, far worse out there to be read.

lucy5 · 06/05/2007 20:55

Wannabe, i always agree with you, although I don't often tell you . I think you are the voice of reason.

lyrabelacqua · 06/05/2007 20:55

I can't see them selling their story if their child isn't found safe and well.

expatinscotland · 06/05/2007 20:56

I agree, wannabe.

I truly do.

NKF · 06/05/2007 20:56

To be clear, I understand that even posting on this subject can feel uncomfortable but I'm not in agreement that should lead to threads being deleted. But then it's not my decision. It will be interesting to see what happens.

fairyjay · 06/05/2007 20:57

I think it's a bit of a presumption that they will sell their story. Unless of course, you know the McCanns!!

gothicmama · 06/05/2007 20:57

I think they should be left if it was me then I would want to know what mn consensus was adn be uplifted by the support shown and also recognise that people's speculation is natural I also think the majority of negative posts have been addressed positively elsewhere,

NKF · 06/05/2007 20:58

They might tell or sell their story. Whatever they did doesn't, to my mind, change anything regarding posts on mumsnet.

CaptainUnderpants · 06/05/2007 20:58

Any comment from MN towers in relation to 'deletion '?

franch · 06/05/2007 20:58

On balance I would be against deleting.

Original poster
homemama · 06/05/2007 20:59

Well to me, pissing someone off because you disagree with a particular parenting style of theirs is not in the same league as causing unnecessary distress to what could end up being a grieving mother.

But I didn't start this thread to argue.

OP posts:
NKF · 06/05/2007 20:59

Presumably someone has asked for deletion and received a reply.

fairyjay · 06/05/2007 21:01

I agree homemama - and baysmum did say that the family had an mn connection.

SenoraPostrophe · 06/05/2007 21:01

I decided that it was a bit much to expect people to count my vote when I admitted to not reading the thread.

I just have and didn't read anything quite as bad as I expected but still think it should be deleted.

lyrabelacqua · 06/05/2007 21:02

Will any of them even be reading MN though with all this going on? Even after it's all over will they start trawling old Mn threads?

Greensleeves · 06/05/2007 21:03

I'm with baysmum on this one, while I am usually against whole-thread deletion I think some circumstances are exceptional, and this is one of them. If I were the mother/aunt/family friend of that little girl, and a MNer, I would expect them to respect my needs and delete everything relating to it. There are in fact MNers who are up against potential huge tragedy - MNers with very sick children, very sick spouses etc - if they requested deletions on the grounds that some threads were just too painful, would you refuse them? What baysmum is suggesting is just a pre-emptive exercise of the same courtesy. And it costs us nothing - there are plenty of other salacious topics to discuss, emote over and sharpen our intellectual claws on .