'Glue for labia'

[ooohsopink]

A US chiropractor has 'developed' a 'glue' that makes your labia stick together when you are having a period, to hold back the menstrual blood until you next pee.

Apparently, this is hygienic and will help women from becoming distracted by their monthly menstrual cycle.

Discuss.

That's a truly shit idea. You'd probably wind up with your knickers glued to your bits as well. Imagine rocking up to a&he with that mess. I also can't fathom how having a wee is supposed to wash this glue away. When I pee it comes out in a stream, not like a garden sprinkler (tmi I know) and in no way does it spray all over my undercarriage in a manner suitable for dissolving fanny glue.

Does he not realise that gluing the labia together would not stop the blood coming out?! The hole is at the very end of the labia where there isn't much tissue - idiot!

Sounds like a brilliant contraceptive!

Well! You think you've seen all the misogynistic twaddle you ever could and then some prick comes and tops it with fanny glue. Surely he means sealing the vaginal introitus not the labia?! How would you get a seal on the labia, good enough to stop the flow? This guy clearly has never been within ten foot of an actual vagina.

Glue my fanny together - how about No.

It would need to be tested and go through the preclinical/clinical testing programme of a medical device. The patent was only issued in January so they are a little premature in designing their pouting woman website I think.
The whole 'women are distracted by periods' thing is too bonkers to comment on; so I won't.

...Nah, couldn't resist. Would the glue work to stick penises down? Surely men would be less distracted if they couldn't become aroused plus the bonus of them always hitting the toilet as they'll have to sit down to wee so less effort all round.

I started reading the thread, thinking what the actual F...!
Your responses have me rolling around with tears streaming down my face.
Sorry but is he on glue?

I was convinced this was satire from NewsThump or something. apparently not

I have to say, op, that I'm glad I'm not so thin skinned that I take offence about you putting in the word "discuss". Mumsnet has become inundated with posters feeling personally affronted about zilch.

Anyway, fwiw, I think I'd be much more worried about the gymnastics involved in constantly having to glue myself up in various loos, home, friends, public etc.and then standing about trying to work out if the adhesive has "taken". I'm distressed by more people trying to make out that there is something wrong with perfectly natural bodily functions.

He was granted a patent for this fuckwittery on 10 January.

Check out the drawing of the female genitalia on the abstract

I am half tempted to have a go with this "product" when menstruating heavily, shortly before visiting his office, sitting on his chair and coughing.

I think dudebro's been snorting his own product.

Meanwhile my reproductive system is trying to burrow up into my chest area at the thought of putting glue anywhere near it.

Let's talk penises. Condoms? A thing of the past! Just glue the end of your feller-me-lad together and hey presto! Instant contraception!

You beat me to it!
I think there should be a product for gluing men's bits together.
It would prevent the poor dears from getting distracted.

Wouldn't it be doubly painful if you're a bit of a hairy mary in the nether regions?

You can tell a man thought this up. Based on the types of bare fanjos he sees through watching porn.

LondonHuffyPuffy I'd probably be game for that too

He was granted a patent????

That is the funniest thing I've ever read on MN.

I hope he puts lots and lots of money into it.

this is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of. why do we need a new (stupid) method to prevent getting blood in our trousers once a month when we have more than adequate means now (tampons, towels, cups, stick a bit of look roll in your pants if caught without etc). What absolute plonker would come up with the idea of gluing your vagina shut? how is that less time consuming? who gets distracted by going to the loo? what an absolute knobhead. I hope he ploughs his life saving into it and then discovers no same woman will buy it.

I think he should demonstrate the glue on his foreskin (or what's left of it, if he is USain.)

I'd pay good money to see that.

Surely this has multiple applications - e.g. runny nose due to a cold? Glue your nostrils shut.

I'm trying to imagine how having to piss on your own vaginal opening is anyway less messy or distracting than changing a tampon.

Peeing into a bloody cup when pregnant is trauma enough. Why? WHY, would anybody think this will s a good idea... Oh yeah, he's a bloke. Says. It. All.

what an absolute cock this bloke is. I've just been reading more about him. I almost hope it's elaborate trolley as that would make him marginally less of a twat than someone that thinks women should really glue their vaginas shut. According to his personal Facebook page he appears to have a wife or partner, astoundingly, I wonder whether someone should ask her if he's tried it on her, although she appears to be post menopausal. what an absolute knobhead.

Tribpot I'm a good aim, after 45 years of toilet training, but I think I'd struggle to piss up my own nostril.

The comments on this thread have made me laugh so much I have just sprayed after dinner coffee all over the kitchen table.
Kids think I am choking to death.
Better glue my (facial) lips shut.

It's called a Lip-Stick.

Get that?

Fuck that.

I find the 'discuss' quite funny in a tongue in cheek way. I imagine poster stroking an imaginary beard...

Anyway - I agree with PP who said they would use it to glue his own lips shut to stop the bullshit. what a ridiculous idea!!

That is the worst idea ever. What about infection?