Tia Sharpe case

[phantomnamechanger]

I had been wondering about this case ever since it first hit the headlines last year, as my DD is the same age as Tia
uk.news.yahoo.com/tia-sharp-hazell-took-photo-girls-body-163949011.html#R5Rq9Sd distressing details emerging of this case. poor child. I hope her killer gets a very very very long sentence. What a week, with this and the April Jones case. Sick, sick individuals.

Just wondering if the tax payer is supporting this family

My red flag blind family was of the naice middle class variety. As a member of the hobbling waddlers saying quack, I am drawn to my ilk. And we are not quite as rare as you might want to believe.

When you make it about poltical point scoring and political ideology you run a massive tank of self interest over the backs of children who need you to focus on where the important issues really do lie.

I'd be asking the same questions of the other people you give as examples.

So how do you prevent this?

There will always be people who lack judgement and are manipulated by abusers? How do you prevent this?

Kicking them when they are down won't solve anything.

there is no 'there but for the grace of god' it was not bad luck that gave this creature access to Tia. the poor lifestyle of the whole family gave him access to her. there were no red flags for paedophilia but drug taking, excess drinking, a criminal record as long as your arm is a huge red flag for not allowing this person across your threshold, let alone near your children.

To prevent such terrible actions it is important to ensure that the parents and family are proper people. This means they aren't drug addicts, violent and all other types of behaviour that isn't normal. imho this is done by education, having a work ethic and living respectful to those around.

Vanessa George had a work ethic, so did the working parents who left their babies in her care.

I would call what she did a work ethic

typing - I wouldn't call what she did a work ethic

She had worked all her life, and paid taxes.. didn't mean she wasn't evil. Is my point. A work ethic prevents child abuse, that is ridiculous.

Working, non drug using, outwardly resoectable men and women won't abuse your kids -- very dangerous notion

I can't follow you - how can you be saying what she did was somehow her job?

The GM worked nights as a carer, I read, which is why Tia was left with Hazell.

I didn't say that, I said she had worked all her life. You were the one equating workshy with being a potential child abuser. I can't see how the two are linked at all.

NC78 - I am not following you either. You seem to be making excuses for this family, the drug taking would be the biggest red flag of all for me along with being in jail!

What if we heard (and I am not sure one way or the other) that the family are being paid for being touted around the media? Would that be seen as Ok to you?

There are large amounts of families living like this, with endless ex partners, drug taking and children just being left to bring themselves up.

My DM volunteers in an Inner London school where half the children come having not had anything for breakfast. Some of them walk to school themselves at 5 and 6 and say 'Mum's still in bed' .

Instead of making excuses for them how can we make things better and make some of the things they do become less acceptable (and letting a 5 year old walk to school without breakfast because you cannot be bothered to get up is totally unacceptable!)

I hope you are right about abuse in institutions maryz.

We can't take the kids from every parent lacking judgement, due to drugs etc, surely? Are there even enough care homes/foster parents out there?
And most kids with addict parents won't end up sexually abused - the two just happened together in this case. You won't identify most of the kids at risk of sexual abuse by taking the kids of addicts, criminals, women with multiple partners etc.

And some parents with red flag blindness will be outwardly quite sensible and respectable. How do we identify these? And prove it? There has to be proof before you can remove a child.

One of my friends teaches in a similar school, and I have heard similar things. I don't know what the solution is.

I was just asking on their social situation - this seems a normal question imho

I'm not putting workshy together with child abuse - how can you write that nc78? It's very clear what I have said

Not being a drug addict or substance abuser for a start would be helpful to being a good parent

You can't just walk in and take every child who lives in a chaotic home.

I know, that's what I mean. I'm not sure this could of been prevented. And people with no insight into red flags won't always be capable of developing it.

Some kids are substance abusing at 13 or 14 because of their home lives. I don't know what the answer is either.

Other than giving everyone a 'state sponsored' mentor or parent-substitute to support and monitor them and report back to Big Brother and that would be completely bloody crackers.

Like Maryz says, some professionals have to walk the tightrope of not enough or too much intervention in family life. And I agree with Carpe, some people judge risk differently because their 'normal' is sadly a pretty damaged picture.

I know what you mean NC78 in that of course we cannot going storming in and judging what is right and wrong in a home. How would we do it - a panel of 'experts!'

However I do think that it is now more acceptable to do what you like, move from partner to partner, have many children all by different men, have children without any visible means of support and you wont be judged.

Not working and lazing around in bed not bothering to take your children to school is awful and shouldnt be seen as acceptable and as just one of those things.