Five-a-day parenting 'checklist'? What do you think?

[HelenMumsnet]

Hello. We've just heard about this proposal to give all parents a five-a-day checklist, detailing how they should bring up their children.

Apparently, it's an idea that's winning the support of many politicians.

Would it win your support?

Xenia well knows from other threads that most studies show a mother's educational attainment is the strongest indicator of outcomes, that income is far less critical on its own (although educational attainment does obviously link). And when you think of what education should produce-a sense of self among others, of the importance of dialogue and discussion, it also correlates with the list rather well, and then creates a virtuous circle where knowledge is passed on by the list.

Coren's point is just perfect-a lovely statement that it's all about being classy, without any thought as to how often that stereotype doesn't work. Which is exactly what's wanted by producing this-look we're not nannying the nice folk who can pat themselves on the back, just the parents of those they fear being burgled by in Paranoia Close.

Xenia-you are full of contradictions
I think you will find most idyllic rural villagea are stuffed full of the 'right ' type of people
Do mothers with IQs never quit their careers to bring up their children?

Finally how would you define class? You seem to be equating it purely to occupation/income.To me class is much more about a shared set of values and beliefs.

Xenia does make me laugh. She is only yanking your chain. Some of the points she makes are valid or have some validity but they are presented in a way that annoys most people.

Xenia makes me laugh!

She does have some good points but they get completely lost in sentences such as :

'Plenty of parents seek a rural idyll which means they don't have mcuh money and their primary childre like the mud etc but come teenage years they are adopting awful accents and hanging round the village green bus shelter because there's nothing else to do in the supposed idyll.'

Some do, some don't. I survived without an accent or hanging around-so did my DCs-they had too many interests and hobbies. Only the boring are bored and they would be just as bored in town, if they had no money. Do they get wonderful accents hanging around street corners in London?

It is about as stereotypical as anorexia in the hothouse, all girls, selective school. Some will-most won't.

The type of DC who will hang around, getting into drink and drugs, will do it where ever they live. I think that all it means is the more money they have and the more privileged background the have the harder the drugs. But of course we are back to stereotypes.

Don't really get why people find the suggestion so outrageous. For some it will be common sense, for others an unattainable target, for most of us a helpful reminder of what we mean to do, but not always manage.

This is badly worded (apologies, need to go back to work and cannot afford time to redraft), but if somebody can be offended by the simple reminder that it is good for physical health to eat fruit and veg and good for mental health to talk to your children, read with them and give them lots of cuddles, then that person has a self-image/self-confidence problem.

I have recently met a friend of a friends little girl who at 14 months has only just learnt to sit up, can not roll from back to front and is quite unresponsive to anything other than the TV. I honestly dont know if this is because she has some developmental problems or just due to her lazy parents.

I dont really know her parents well but from what I have been told they dont spend time with her playing, she is stuck in a baby bouncer all the time watching tv, she hasnt had tummy time, hence she hasnt learnt to sit up properly or crawl, her hand to eye co-ordination is awful, she cannot grasp a ball properly, she is only just babbling now, no where near talking.

To start with I thought the 5 a day was a bit ridiculous but having seen the poor child I mentioned I think there is obviously a need in some cases to drum it into parents heads, the poor child was thrilled with being taken out and talked to and played with.

Quite insulting actually. A kind of 'tell us something we don't know' thing.

Buterfiles, that is so sad. I feel so sorry that a child can be so casually neglected like that. Did you get the impression that this 5 a day thing would be something the mother would listen to?

yamayama I doubt it, but then if it is drummed into everyones head, there is no excuse for them is there?

Noone can say, "oh but I didnt know"

The child is now having physiotheraphy to build her muscles up, it shocked me so much that in this day and age a mother can just obviously neglect her child and get away with it.

The child is fed well and clothed well but that is it, it simply isnt enough.

Mobile phones, the internet, 24 hour tv means that parents have loads of options of things to do rather than speak to their children so this proposal is a timely reminder.

Someone said
'Where's the reward for being brilliant, perhaps if your child gets to 21 without SS/the police and the school being involved we could get some sort of cash bonus.'

This type of comment is often used as an example of good parenting - child gets to 18 and into uni/work - in fact child has to grow into adulthood and be capable of forming a longterm relationship with another human and hold down a job to provide for itself and a stable home for its own children.

Getting your child to 18 without a criminal record is only a wee part of its life.

Is the government really planning to spend money though, or are they just considering putting up a few posters in doctor's surgeries and maybe rebranding some of the courses that are already being run?

Re: your daughter SpottyFrock I suspect the problem is that you probably know more about supporting your daughter than most professionals, and being cynical, I think all governments just pay lip service to supporting children who are outside the mainstream in the mainstream system.