My house is so messy, dirty and awful I need help PLEASE :-(

[namechangedforareason]

I HATE my house. It has got to the point I can't bear to be at home. We go to toddler groups or classes most days and if I am at home I feel awful. I can't bear the state I have let the house get in to. It is dirty, very messy, cluttered etc. I feel bad for my children. I NEED to get it sorted for their sake and mine.

DH is taking the kids out for a couple of hours tomorrow.

So there is my chance to get it sorted. But I don't even know where to start!

I feel like I am always cleaning and tidying. But it is still a right state - how does that work?!

I am not looking for a spotless house, I would hate that. But I would love for it to be safe and hygenic for my kids, and to be able to have friends over at the last min without being embarrassed about the state of the house.

PLLLLLLLEEEEAAAAASSSSSSEEEE Help me. I am really desperate.

Feeling like crap today so have cancelled our plans, except my appointment at 6pm which is to have the coil fitted. Wish I could cancel that but I waited about 2 months for that appointment.

I'm feeling pretty awful too, but I'm going to try to do a bit.

Is it the mirena namechanged? I had mine out in June...having it in was a dreadful experience for me.

Is anyone else coming back to this thread? I've done nothing again today, but I really have to get going again this week.

I have managed to get DD2 to sleep and put her in a crib, so I'm having a mad dash round trying to do any kitchen stuff whilst she is out of my arms

(Bulb has gone in the kitchen and can't be arsed to go to shop for new one, so need to do kitchen stuff in daylight )

Damn. Shouldn't have wasted 5 mins sat here... she's crying again

Oooh stopped - will run now!

Lol Flame! My electrics have completely failed in my kitchen and hall since last spring, so I have a lounge lighting thingy in my kitchen. Not practical at all...think I might join you in a mad kitchen dash...

she must have started again whilst I was doing dishes (washing machine on, tap running, kettle boiling) - monitor broken so I didn't hear her.

She looks frantic and terrified to take her eyes off me.

I did achieve a lot though

(we have a bike light in the ktchen atm )

LOL! ooops! at least you can just get another bulb Flame. I have to have my whole house rewired

stories like that make me stop wanting to own somewhere and just be pleased we rent

(that grin wasn't meant to look so heartless )

It's ok. I can only do what I can do...

I'd still rather own than rent tbh. I'm just worried about paying the mortgage right now and there's not a chance in hell I can find the money to rewire

Which worries the hell out of me as I worry about the house catching fire...

Thinking non-firing thoughts for you!

Have had a quick run round now whilst DD is still asleep from school run and waiting for HV

I am overwhelmed by mess in my house too. However, at almost 60yrs old, a part-time job and four grown up "children" in the house (the eldest in his mid-30's,would you believe), I am finding it more and more difficult to cope with. I take a large bag of unwanted items to a charity shop on a weekly basis - all of it mine only! My house was so much cleaner/tidier when the children were small & could be bribed with a trip to the park (or whathaveyou) once they'd put things/toys away. Once out of the house, I don't want to return.

Don't talk to me of storage-my nine room house also has a two room cellar and a loft that is fit to burst. Impossible to find anything up there and a continuous worry as I lie awake at night looking up at the ceiling and fretting about all that above my head. Husband is a hoarder and pays no mind as he only eats and sleeps here. I meanwhile, am lonely having socially isolated myself due to embarrassment.

Gymraes how awful for you, not sure what else to say. Do you have any space in there that is just yours that you have control over?

gymraes is there any particular reason why your children cannot hep more?

They should be contributing financially and physically there is no reason why you should do this alone. It seems to me that there is a lot more to this than cleaning

Can I suggest you start a new thread - preferably in relationships where you will get some really good advice.

glad im not the only one that can get stuck on the mumsnet website esp when its house cleaning time.. all day yes.. until school pick up ,, then i go crazy cleaning cooking until i drop at 9.30pm

I referred to this thread a few months ago as I got into a terrible state where house got so messy I didn't answer the door or open curtains on my ground floor. I had clothes everywhere and floor was sticky from spillages so it just built up and built up. It got to the point where I thought if I died today my family and friends would be shocked if they went into my house. I wasn't a social recluse or anything but it got to a point where I just didn't know how to tackle it. This situation arose following a period of grief within my life.

I had a spare weekend where I thought I would blitz everything as much as I could but I just thought what was the point. The problem is I'm quite lazy and don't like spending my free time doing chores.

I read the fly lady site and although I didn't follow it completely I did use the concept of having "focus areas". The first thing I cleaned was the area in front of my sofa which is about half of my living room. I made it so when I sat on the sofa and looked ahead it would be virtually flawless meaning I could relax in the evening.

I then moved onto other areas and realised I was usually just moving junk from one room to another so I bought a few of those plastic boxes from Wilkinsons to put things in.

Another thing I did was picked up and cleared a piece of junk each time I walked from one room to another. This made something like a pile of clothes on the floor seem so much smaller even within one day without seeming to take up much of your time.

I'm in a much better position now and have friends over. It really was impacting my happiness levels at some point. I wanted to find this post again and thank everyone for the tips and also share my own tips.

I kni

Oops sorry! I know we're not supposed to comment on people redirecting 'zombie' threads but well done to you! Sounds like you had a lot to do so you must feel a massive sense of achievement. A turning point for me was accepting I have to clean in my spare time otherwise. It's a bit like eating healthily (which am working on) that to get results you have to put the effort in. Good luck!

One thing which is hard to do is clearing bathroom. We get unwanted stuff for Xmas, or people visit and leave stuff. Just bin it. Bin it. Bin it.

It's hard at first to bin perfectly good stuff but if Xmas stuff is still around in Aug bin it, unless v expensive and your one favourite perfume, note I said one.
LIkewise cleaning stuff, DH shops and decides he needs some wonder spray to clean something in his workshop (not house as he is too lazy). Bin them Bin them Bin them. Keep one bottle of cleaner and maybe one for windows, and one for floors, one for hob. The end.

But where do we put all the boxes i have nowhere to put boxes once filled ideas plz..
Thanks 😁