My house is so messy, dirty and awful I need help PLEASE :-(

[namechangedforareason]

I HATE my house. It has got to the point I can't bear to be at home. We go to toddler groups or classes most days and if I am at home I feel awful. I can't bear the state I have let the house get in to. It is dirty, very messy, cluttered etc. I feel bad for my children. I NEED to get it sorted for their sake and mine.

DH is taking the kids out for a couple of hours tomorrow.

So there is my chance to get it sorted. But I don't even know where to start!

I feel like I am always cleaning and tidying. But it is still a right state - how does that work?!

I am not looking for a spotless house, I would hate that. But I would love for it to be safe and hygenic for my kids, and to be able to have friends over at the last min without being embarrassed about the state of the house.

PLLLLLLLEEEEAAAAASSSSSSEEEE Help me. I am really desperate.

Is the Slatterns thread still going?

That hugely helped me.

I now follow a few rules

• place for everything. I used an old cd tower as a shoe rack in the hall (for extra storage join freecycle you never know)

• every time you leave a room pick up somethig that needs to be elsewhere.

• wipe any small spills/ crumbs striaght away, once a table is messy I tend to think stuff it and it gets messier / more cluttered

• quick mop/hoover every day really helps

I had a major wake up call last
week while out visiting clients with my boss. At one, house which was a little bit cluttery and to be fair, had a slightly odd smell, my boss said afterwards she felt she wouldn't have been able to accept a drink there as it was 'so filthy.'
My house is worse and I realised that my boss would probably end up rocking and crooning in a corner if she ever visited...

OK, she is possibly on the other end of the scale - she admits to being slightly OCD-ish - but it made me look at my home through other's eyes.

I cleaned and tidied obsessively at the weekend, but still not sure it would pass muster to some people.

It is too small and we have too much stuff. But having been very skint for a long time, I tend to hoard stuff just in case I need it and can't afford to replace it, IYKWIM.

Devil - yes slatterns are still going - I linked to that, and the FLYing thread in one of my earlier posts (as well as the crisis cleaning) .

Molly, when you said :
"It is too small and we have too much stuff. But having been very skint for a long time, I tend to hoard stuff just in case I need it and can't afford to replace it, IYKWIM."

That is EXACTLY my porblem. If I give something away, and then later on I decide I need it, we have no money to replace it, so keep what we have incase we need it later on! BUT I need to stop it, as yes it saves us a bit of money but TBH I am on the way to depression because of it all. I honestly don't think its PND, think it is just messy house depression!

Really feel the list thing on my other thread might work, but could really do with somebody going through it for me to make sure I haven't missed some major jobs as otherwise it won't work.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/good_housekeeping/866376-Would-anybody-help-me-do-a-rota-or-cleaning-and?rnd=12 58984902993

I agree with people on here that having storage is the most important thing to keeping my house clean. If I know where something goes, it rarely ends up left in the middle of the room (although that does still happen sometime )
I spent a day doing DIY and found it the most useful thing for getting my house in order.
I hung hooks and screws everywhere! Under sink cupboard (for hanging cloths, dusters, rubber gloves) wardrobe doors (for ties, scarves, belts etc...) under desks (for power cables) under stairs cupboard (ironing board and iron) bedroom doors (dressing gowns, handbags) and loads more.
I also got some cheap wallpaper offcuts from laura ashley (£1.50 a roll) and covered a load of boxes and labelled them for my living room shelves. Now I stuff 'post' in one, 'puzzles' in another 'gift wrap', 'craft' 'diapers' 'lego' 'notebooks' etc... so all that unsightly stuff is hidden away.
It makes a massive difference, and wiping down the surfaces and vaccuuming doesn't seem so daunting when you've got a clear space.

p.s. enjoy a I know how you feel!

Gosh I hate that too. I am jealous of friends with lovely loft rooms they can use for storage. i'm wrst with my clothes, magazines and books tbh. I'm good with giving away DC's things to friends or on freecycle.

I just hte thinking ooohthat belt would be great then realising I've given it to the charity shop.

I'm a hoader too for the same reason...not to mention that I'm hugely sentimental about things. And I haven't done a damned thing all day ~ yet. I've thought about it a lot though!

you could be me.

I plan to start flylady again tomorrow

And if my pc would read the threads out loud for me and take dictation on MN, I'd get so much more done every day

I am going to do something in a minute Flame! honest!

But all my clutter stuff is beautiful or useful...

HoochiMoma - I'm entirely with you when it comes to decluttering. If you have more stuff than you have storage space then you've got too much stuff. You should also bear this in miond when buying/being given new stuff - I have a one in one out policy. I also find it addictive. And once the clutter is gone it's so much easy to keep things tidy. I would start with anything broken or worn out and, when it comes to clothes, anything that no longer fits.

Noooooooo! see, one day, those size 10/12 clothes will fit me again.

Right! I'm logging off to go do something useful!

solo - do it with me "tomorrow"

But once you can actually fit into them again will actualy want to wear them - surely you'll be treating yourself to something up-to-date as a reward?

Are you me Solo????? I have a special wardrobe for clothes that WILL fit again

I currently have a hall full of stuff to freecycle. But hasn't made much of a dint in the mountain of hell on top of bedroom wardrobe

Oh I totally agree about decluttering. FLYlady's 27 fling boogie is sooooo liberating. But even after getting rid of everything you don't need, there is still stuff you do need (please don't tell me my ironing board has to go and that you don't have washing up cloths!) and you don't want on display.
That's where storage comes into play. I use storage to mean 'I have used plan to use this within 6 months but don't want to display it'. My sons lego comes out nearly every day, but it still goes back in the box when we are done playing with it. Otherwise I would never vacuum because I don't want to pick it all up off the floor first.

de-cluttering is totally liberating, and i'm speaking as a 'reformed' hoarder. I can honestly say that there has only been a couple of occasions when I have truly wanted something i've thrown out or donated, and it has never been a trauma. You don't know half the stuff you have if you have clutter, and you can't clean or tidy clutter - just rearrange it.

I now have nothing under my bed at all and only a few 'display' items on top of my wardrobe. Almost everything has a place. It makes cleaning so much easier. Get the others on board too - I heard of a good idea to get everyone tidying their own stuff away (not very littlies obviously):
Have a set time every day for tidying - just before dinner or whatever. Set a timer and get everyone to pick up their stuff. Then you go round afterwards with box/basket and everything that you find that shouldn't be out, put it in the box and charge a 'nominal' fine for the person to get it back. (Mate who suggested this said she made the most money from her dh!!!lol) Put extra few quid a month towards a family treat.

Other good suggestion for teens etc is to have a box/basket on stairs at bottom of stairs (whatever suits) and put peoples stuff in is as you go along. If it hasn't gone upstairs by the end of the day - take box and empty contents onto floor of relavent room. for persistant offenders you could always threaten with the bin!