Hoarders Anonymous. Thread #8. We Are Keeping On Keeping On. Fighting The Cluttered Fight.

[Solo]

We are a group of likeminded householders who are leading somewhat challenging lives; be that living with too much 'stuff' that we find difficult to deal with, houses that are falling apart (mine is), health issues within the family unit, wider family, or ourselves (me too) that means sorting out our households is challenging to say the least. So...

You are all welcome to join us for support, adding your ideas to help others out, storage ideas, and even tips on actually getting those items out of the house which sounds so simple when you say it, but this part can be so very difficult; we are often attached emotionally to our 'things', afraid of letting things go just in case we need them.

Encouragement and support abound here in our band of clutterbugs. We never ever criticise anyone! We even try not to criticise ourselves as it's not helpful to anyone, but this can be very difficult to achieve.

If you are feeling overwhelmed by clutter, mess, disorganization and generally don't know where to start. If you can't be bothered, but really do want to be bothered. If you think you are a bit lazy, or if you just need to see your highs and lows and everything in between on the screen here, join us, and we will help you. We'll virtually high-five your achievements - small or large, and virtually hug you when the need arises. If you want a hug, just ask because we are here for you, here for one another because we get it. The art of washing up is sometimes our great achievement of the day, but it's still an achievement

Some helpful links. They aren't for everyone, but have a look if you fancy:

• Help For Hoarders by Jasmine Harman (the author/producer of the BBC1 documentaries My Hoarder Mum and Me and Britain's Biggest Hoarders)
• The FlyLady Cleaning Method by Marla Cilley
• The Organised Mum Method by Gemma Bray
• The KonMari Method by Marie Kondo
• A Slob Comes Clean by Dana K. White
• The Getting Things Done Method by David Allen

And a LINK-#7

I'm not sure if The Flylady link is working, but if not, you know what to search for.

Welcome to thread #8 of Hoarders Anonymous. Thread #8. We Are Keeping On Keeping On. Fighting The Cluttered Fight (and winning, one small step at a time).

Christmas eve eve and the shower has broken. Arse. Still vaguely usable.

Oh no Elle. Get well soon.

Done the Christmas shop. Got a lot of it away. Need to sort more out. (Non perishables. )

Have three plumbing jobs lined up and need to clean to make way for them.

V overwhelmed.

@BlackeyedSusan Sorry to hear about the shower and other plumbing malfunctions. Christmas is hard going enough without additional strains, especially with autism in the mix. Hope you have all you need to fix stuff.

Also very overwhelmed and struggling to carry the load while others cop onto it's Christmas eve and last chance to do anything if they actually want the Christmas they claim they do!
We're seeing a vicious re emergence of sabotaging behaviors here, while insisting x,y, and z, is essential, then making it as good as impossible and blaming me for being ill and disabled, whilst insisting I take on board the latest engineering development of a particular airplane, that they've already told me all about, so I shouldn't need constant back info to understand!
I know it's not thought out or intentional and goes with the territory, but I'm not saint enough to take much more.

Launderette done, inc futon cover and additional towels but not put away. Christmas food shop done and partly put away. Tree not done, half the wrong boxes waiting to be replaced with the right ones! Wheelchair access platform missing vital bolts - somewhere in storage unit! Wreath partially done.

Missing an essential box with gadgets to make tree lights work and power boards. Somewhere in storage, Which one?
All have ltd access this morning only, and I need sleep to manage the huge list of things backed up to be done today, even cutting it down to essentials only.
Eat, cook, don't sleep, rinse, repeat.

That was it. Wishing all the energy and luck pulling together whatever they need to achieve today.

If I can get the table cleared enough tomorrow for a festive Christmas lunch, I’ll be delighted.

I overslept today and have given myself the gift of forgiving myself for not delivering much of a Christmas in difficult circumstances. Food and presents for the DC will have to be enough as there’s no space for a tree or time to decorate much.

We have been visiting hoarding parent in nursing home, between times I’ve been catching up on my work which has been much neglected.

Wishing all on this board a very happy Christmas 🎄

Yes, happy Christmas to everyone! I’ve just started wrapping presents but mainly because it took ages to put up very complicated curtain rail and curtains, but pleased we have curtains in living room for Christmas!
hooe you get the table cleared, finite sagacity, and wishing you strength and some good moments Elleherd

@FiniteSagacity A very good gift to give yourself. The best we can do in difficult circumstances is not be miserable in them. You have moved mountains and handled difficult situations admirably. May your table come together and a lovely meal be enjoyed by all.

@Thehillsarealivewithbutterflies Thank you. Well done getting the curtains up. Hope the wrapping went well.

I found the box. It wasn't in storage, I'd sensibly brought it back out, but too stupidly ill to realize that until I'd lost half a day to searching storage units for it. Still faced with big list and too ill to manage most of it, so it is what it is.

👑👑👑Happy Christmas to all! 👑👑👑
Whatever state things or selves are in, well done for getting this far! 👑👑👑

Hello, live to all and thanks for the congratulations. Have a bit of a dilema now though. There may be another job coming up for less money but a 2 minute walk instead of a 20min drive and better hours.🤔

Having a nighmare trying to get a guttering leak fixed. 1st one said he had been out and fixed so paid him. It rained a couple of days later. The guy isn't answering calls. The second one came out and the leak is now worse. He said he'd return but hasn't.

I haven't done muh tidying recently. Hopefully can start again soon. My struggle is getting to bed early as a lack of sleep ruins my day for this.

Congratulations on getting the curtains up.

List <checks spelling carefully>

Hope you all had a good as possible Christmas.

Operation get in plumber:

Started wiping(ASD) and putting away shopping from Christmas eve.
DD has washed out a new storage box that is going to contain wrapping paper.

So I need to clear bathroom, hall, bit of landing and kitchen. Clean these. Make way to get to stop tap. (Easy after last time)

Contact plumber

I have washing to do. At ex's. Once the kitchen is clean for tap to be fixed washing machine can also be bought and plumbed in.

Bloody knackered as kid kept me awake til 4am . After driving 120 mile round trip for Christmas with relatives. (Dark and foggy)

Mum's house still has a tree, and a roof. The leak is bigger so getting more urgent. It's all too much to organise.

Hope you can get the leak sorted soon!

Feel sick and dizzy so not doing much as fast. And mostly thing that don't require bending over.

Got out a present and wiped/washed it to put on work surface in the kitchen.
Washed up and put away most ceramics and pans and baking trays..
Washed up another present
Picked up recycling kid threw on floor
Rinsed some recycling and put in bag in hall.
Sent some presents upstairs with DD.

Stopped for coffee and wait until I can take more decongestants.

Sorted out a bag of left over apples from the tree.washed out the bag and used it to collect the dirty washing to take to ex's

Put the dry washing up away.
Threw out some of the rubbish(empty packets etc) on the work surface.(Why don't they get put straight in the bin?)

Rearranged fridge to get extra stuff in.

All sounds like progress BE Susan! I think half the country is currently ill, me included but I felt a bit better after a bit of putting away. Ganbatte! (Persevere!)

@TalkToTheHand123 Sometimes you're better settling for the think you definitely have, vs the thing you hope to get. It depends if you're in a situation to cope if you lost the one pursuing the other. Trying to get a guttering leak fixed over Christmas is always going to be challenging. Hope you've found one and they can tell you what's actually going on as it sounds like it might be more complicated than a simple leak.

@BlackeyedSusan Dealing with two properties with serious issues along with managing daily SN situations is always going to be hard going, throw in viruses flue etc and it's asking too much. I know exactly what you mean about not bending head down!
I wonder if with Mum's house, if you know it's going to take a fair time for you to be able to do anything, would it be worth having temporary roof tarp put over to reduce damage..? Don't know if this is more trouble than it's worth, and you have to be careful about then not doing things in time, but my biggest mistake is always thinking things will move faster than they do, and when I look back I can see I've done better preparing for the worst, than when I expect things to move at a sensible pace or go right easily. They never do.
You're doing well to systematically keep working towards your goals despite illness, Christmas, driving et al. Hope you can get plumber in soon and the washing machine in soon after. Not having to take washing to ex's will make a big difference.

@Thehillsarealivewithbutterflies Everyone including elderly aunt is ill here. All closely sharing spaces and infecting and re-infecting each other!
I came down so heavily nothing got done or completed and we are living in box city despite my planning, but I was sick enough to not care. I must be getting better as awareness has re surfaced.
Well done on the putting away and yes to Ganbatte! 🎄

Non update, more an attempt to energize myself into action.
I have to manage to achieve lots today, sick or not. Lot of it's going to be making lists and plans alongside with lots of physical stuff that needs doing too.

We're in chaos, still trying to get well enough to enjoy things, and those things won't apparently happen until I happen them.
Trying to get others with capacity, to do any of it seems like wasted energy and humor most of the time, and results in those least capable wanting to help, which doesn't end well for anyone.

Food that couldn't be eaten because we were all unwell, needs cooking up or will go off.
Paid work demands are seriously behind and piling up for Monday, as well as knowing the builders will want to be restarting some point in the New Year, which seems to be just rushing towards us.
Work on Aunts neighbors flat and hers, all ground to a halt uncompleted for Christmas, and hoping it's not an issue that her B&B rent runs out in a few days.

Carer's away until January and just how dependent I am on help to get set up properly to be able to do things, is really showing. But it's come to light a task asked for help with in Oct didn't get completed, and my blue badge has expired, with an up to three month waiting list for renewal, which I didn't need.
We've just bought so so much back over here in order to accommodate everyone. Also because half those carefully labelled boxes turned out to have shed their labels during transport, even more got brought over and gone through, and there's now little order left to anything.

I need to get on with it all or 2025 will start in utter chaos, and I had to go for delayed gratification last year, and know there's so much to tackle, but I'm determined it's going to be the year I pull things together here.

Hope you are feeling better Elle.

I have contacted plumbers (rated people)

Apologies
@blackandwhitestripes apparently you can't delete @ names from a post. Tried everything I can think of

Progress is slow but moving forward.

Started washing the stairs. (Wood not carpet and embarrassingly mucky with wobbly kid going up and down with food)

Binned about 50 million bog roll inner tubes.

Retrieved random shopping off the stairs, wiped, put away.

Making progress on hand washing merino wool base layers.

Emptied two present bags , delivered to owner's room.

I have just caught up with pages and pages as I’ve been absent for months, hellos and well dones all round as I can see there’s a lot of challenging stuff going on for many of us.

Work has been an ongoing nightmare for me (but at least I still have a job). I’ve been just trying to get through and no energy for extras. My sleep has been utterly shit as I’m so stressed and that is making the days feel like wading through treacle. The time off for Christmas has been a true blessing, though I predictably caught a bug and have been very unproductive.

My house is at the very bottom of my priority list but needs to be a lot higher. This time of year always feels like a fresh start and I like making lists of plans/resolutions. I’m also a sucker for bullet journals/ organising notebooks etc and I’ve been dreaming on paper today.

Weirdly I think there is something in it as I found an old list of goals from a few years back in an old journal and I’ve achieved several big ones despite them seeming unrealistic at the time. Sadly none of the decluttering ones came to pass, but maybe 2025 is the year I finally deal with my overwhelming amount of stuff…

@Elleherd hope you are feeling better soon & that you get a decent amount of notice from the landlord/surveyor before the next lot of works. Regular batch cooking is one of my goals for next year to try and make my life easier. Do share if you have any particularly tasty recipes as I seem to default to a basic curry and bolognese.

@BlackeyedSusan get well soon wishes to you too. Are you enjoying the break from all the school run driving over the holidays? Hope you can get the plumbing stuff sorted soon too.

@BlueSummerBaby I bought some stuff pre-Christmas which I need to return. I’ve been eyeing some reduced skincare gift sets (see above, my usual late December plans to sort my wrinkles, hydration, diet, exercise, house, finances, etc etc), but have so far resisted (partly through indecision on what would be best). What did you go for?

@FiniteSagacity it sounds like such a tough situation all round. How is your parent coping with the changes? I have not gone through this (yet!) but did help a parent declutter some years back. It was a bit easier than decluttering my own stuff but I still had a lot of emotional attachment to things I’d grown up with so tricky enough! Also any time said parent can’t find something it will be blamed on me or another sibling throwing it out.

@TalkToTheHand123 hurrah for new job!! Could you accept it but still apply for the closer one to see what happens? I’m keeping my eye on a few job sites. I’ve heard it’s a tough market so very well done.

I can’t scroll back without the danger of losing my post so will leave it there.

@BlackeyedSusan Well done on consistent progress. Slow and steady is more likely to embed habits. I reckon most people's stairs are a lot worse than they think, and they have carpeting. It's ramps here, and I have heavy duty scrubbable mats at key points where spills are most likely which I thought was going to be the answer but others are impervious to my attempts at lowering need for cleaning.

@Sameclutternewname It's good to see you. ☕Sorry work and lost sleep has taken it's toll. It is very tough for many at the moment and I hope conditions get better for you. I've got a big piece of work in a couple of weeks and am so scared the builders will want access at the same time. I can't do both, and have to take the work I can get, I'm doing well to get it at all, but one half of the workforce is struggling and the other half seems to have lost any empathy.

Cooking is all vegetarian here and mostly based on what we have, and take a load of this and a load of that and add some of the other, until I think it it tastes and looks ok. 🙃 But I do need to plan more and try and actually measure things when cooking, write them down and be able to reliably repeat them.
We also end up with a lot of market ends tbh, and I need to use the air fryer more as still doing bigger things in the oven, some of it you could probably add meat easily enough, but no idea what it would do taste wise?

Did manage to sort of get on top of cooking up unused food to keep it going for next few days, and mended several things. But too many people with diverse needs (and aunts cats) in too small a space, never mind my need for help to get up and started in the mornings, has reduced the ability to do much beyond cooking and listening to others. They can all happily climb over each other apart from aunt who prefers to be in one place most of the day, but there's no such thing as a wheelchair path in their heads, they're just places to sit and spread out. Most start going in a few more days which will make things easier.

Sameclutter I have the attention span of a fly and can't remember what the conversation is about, so I'll just tell you what I've been buying for Christmas. I got a magazine subscription with a box of skincare from Red and I bought some Merit Beauty supplies including their new skincare, because I've been wanting to try it for ages. I didn't get eyeshadow though because one of the main things my dresser is overrun with is eyeshadow palettes, so that was my (small and insignificant) concession to not buying something I didn't need. I also only bought one lipstick and not one in every shade because I can't decide, like I usually would. I guess I'm making progress. I've not tried any of it yet because I'm still using up what I was already using. It looks good though.

Hope everyone had a great Christmas.

,😳

Plumber 1 been to quote. He was nice and reasonable.

Sitting in bed shell shocked as overwhelming. (Bastard autism)

OCD cleaning needed after having someone in my house. Just recovering enough. Got to clean out the under sink cupboard. And finish cleaning up for him (other) to come in and work.

The stairs were clean. The landing was mostly clean. The kitchen had the worst picked up. But still quite grim. The bathroom was not disgusting.

Hi all. The kitchen and living room seem a little more tidyer. I've just been doing little bits at a time. Planning to stay off alcohol, junk food and get more sleep so hopefully makig some further progress.

Kitchen is finished decluttering wise.

Happy New Year.

Congratulations to those reporting progress and happy 2025 to you all!