Flylady Fledglings February: Thawing out of winter

[freezingpompoms]

Hello everyone, iWelcome back to our regulars, and if you are new or returning, a huge welcome to you as well! Please feel free to post or lurk, whatever helps you most.

This is an incredibly helpful thread and the system can be confusing but someone on here will be able to answer your questions and get you on track.

So, Flylady. That mysterious system that promises a lovely clean house! This link is a good place to read about the basic principles, but we strongly recommend ignoring the first bit - do not sign up for emails as you’ll be inundated!

www.flylady.net/d/getting-started/

If you’re new to the system, or are wanting a refresher course, the baby steps may be a good idea. Some are more useful than others, we’ve found, and stuff like affirmations may not work for you, so pick and choose what you want to try. You don’t have to do it all! Perfectionism can be left at the door, we celebrate any achievement here no matter how small it seems (this is why you’ll see our Ta Da lists as well as To Do lists!).

www.flylady.net/d/getting-started/31-beginner-babysteps/

There are parts of the house called zones, each taking a different part of the month, and missions in those zones to do little tasks we may have neglected. If you don’t feel ready for those though, a good way to start is doing 15 minutes decluttering in that zone! Remember it didn’t get messy in a day so it won’t be fixed in a day either. Slow and steady.

Then there’s the daily focus - each day of the week has a theme, although many of us switch them around to suit our own lives.

Each day I’ll provide the link to the launch pad, which is where you can see what is meant to be done that day (but again don’t feel you have to do all of it! That way lies burnout!).

A couple of principles we talk about on here are:
Future Friend - the idea of doing something today that benefits you later, such as choosing your clothes or making your lunch the night before.
Power of Three (po3) - if you’re overwhelmed, just pick three easy tasks - no matter how small - and forget about the rest until they’re done. Then reassess and decide another three.

Finally a few acronyms:
DW - dishwasher, not dear wife!
LOL - load of laundry, we aren’t finding washing hilarious
WM - washing machine
TD - tumble dryer

Strange week here, but we finally put an offer on the house. Hopefully this will get finalised early next week and I can get on with ordering a skip and starting to pack.

No flying today, as it was my "weekend", I am working next 7 days straight. Not looking forward to that. Send coffee.

Cherries wishing you peace to recover from the frazzled

ED I'm the same, can't relax properly unless everything is tidy so have to do it before I go to bed. Hate being faced with mess first thing in the morning

Red sorry to hear you're still feeling so awful, I hope they get to the bottom of it soon and you start to feel better

Willow I love how the decluttering shows make me feel better about my own home

Hills that's all very interesting. I'd come to the conclusion myself that much of the dietary advice doesn't really work, especially if you're already ill.

There's no easy solution with food is there. I'm limited in what options I have and do rely on processed food a lot.

I watched a skit years ago on a comedy show where they were playing the part of a politician and a food company executive discussing how to make something that gorgeous chocolate brown colour that makes things look tasty without alienating the dieters and healthy eating brigade by using chocolate. And the politician suggested they use shit. Literally shit. So they're discussing how nobody is going to buy food with shit in it and how people are getting conscious of reading labels etc. So the politician says it's fine we'll just give it an e-number, label the packet with that and nobody will know. I remember thinking at the time that's probably very close to the truth!

Hazel I procrastinated that shower hose for years so it's good to finally have it done

Ta-da's:

🐊 Morning routine
🐊 Went to post office
🐊 Put some picture cards up on a bedroom wall with BluTack, I'd forgotten how useful that stuff is
🐊 Decluttering
🐊 Tidied bedroom
🐊 Tidied living room
🐊 Evening routine

UNP hope your offer is accepted 🏠Sending you strength (and coffee) ☕ for the week ahead

Just popping in with yesterday’s list but looking forward to reading back properly about dietary stuff, it’s really interesting thanks hills

I’ve had a very lazy day but the kind of non productive playing on iPad all day lazy not the nice relaxing lazy.

YesTaDa
🛞school meeting for work
🛞lunch/planning with colleague
🛞more work
🛞date night!!! DH and I had cheap tickets to a comedy show, was very good and lovely to be out

✅ cooked a cashew and red cabbage biriyani with leftovers for tomorrow
✅ went to soft play party which was actually good fun.
✅ s&s loos

SUNDAY:
Flight plan here:
www.flylady.net/c/fp.php?tzm=0&d=1*
*
Basically it's the day to renew your spirit.
Some ideas for that include:
*
• *worship with your Church
• A walk in the park
• Curl up with a good book
• Take a long hot bubble bath
• Watch a favorite movie

We are moving into zone 2 which is the kitchen.
Link below for more details about that.
www.flylady.net/d/zones/zone-2/

I don't normally do much flying on a Sunday but I find I'm running out of time to get everything done in the week so I might do a couple of kitchen jobs tomorrow to get ahead of myself.

Evening all, I’ve mostly been at home today so I am going out for a walk in a minute. I have had a huge declutter of the airing cupboard (taken three bin bags worth of tatty/yellowed stuff to a charity shop that takes them for rags). Also cleaned the cooker (took an hour ), cooked DS’s favourite dinner and pudding and done all his laundry, lucky boy. He’s back to uni tomorrow, having been out all day today at a very distant sports fixture.

ED I need to do that. My airing cupboard is a massive disaster. It's our cupboard of doom.

The comedy show sounds fun Perry

Thanks for the links Pompoms. I got a head start on the kitchen today.

Ta-da's:

🔬 Morning routine ☕🥣💄
🔬 Decluttering 💊🧣📱
🔬 Took advantage of a moment of peace to start reading my new book, it's called We All Have Secrets 📗🗝️👀
🔬 Cleared rotten stuff out the fridge 😠🤬😤
🔬 Took a walk 🚶🌄⛲
🔬 More decluttering 👗📃🗞️
🔬 Tidied bedroom 👕📚🛏️
🔬 Evening routine 🛀🧘🍝

On the subject of decluttering, what's your home like? Hoarder's paradise, minimalist zen, full of DC mess or something else? I'm wondering when it's going to feel "done" and whether my goal (to have nothing around that's not in current use) is incompatible with modern life 🤔

Can't sleep.
Ditzy re decluttering, I am aiming for 'Only Necessary Useful Items' and DS stuff.. With clothes, if I haven't worn it in a year, it goes. All the random nonsense from

Oops. Posted too soon.
All the random nonsense from the cupboards that's there 'Just In Case' also goes. Anything that's slightly broken but was meant to be repaired for years 'I will fix that' also goes. Make up/toiletries that haven't been used for a while also goes.

@DitzyDaffodils how the new book? Any good?

Decluttering: I aim for at least one thing a day as I used to be on that thread on mn. Anything the kids have outgrown or don't play with goes. Anything I don't wear or use. Books I get from the library now. Everything has a place or it goes. Everything kept in stackable storage boxes in cupboards or under the beds. There are a few decorative items around but not much. Makes cleaning quick and easy.

Morning all.

YesTaDa
🥑sorted another bag of stuff (mainly books) to go to the charity shop
🥑helped DSD with some uni stuff
🥑put Cagletini to bed

That was literally it. But it is a weekend of meds adjustment so I’m trying not to beat myself up about it. Have to say though weekends feel simultaneously more relaxed (in contrast to the week) and more pressured (because I don’t have energy for housework etc in the week) since increasing my work hours. So I do need to try and get some stuff done today.

po3.1
❗️Breakfast and other meds with a big glass of water
❗️Gather some non tumble dry laundry and put on a LOL
❗️Clean planner board

Ditzy my home is pretty messy, you can rarely see floor in my bedroom as it’s where everything gets dumped if we don’t know what to do with it and there are a couple of full-to-bursting cupboards. It’s not at hoarder level - there’s space to play and with a panic tidy session it’s ok to have people in, but there is still a lot of clutter. Our main issue is surfaces, we all struggle with executive function (due to adhd/autism etc) and so are all prone to putting things down and forgetting they exist etc. I don’t think we will ever have a super tidy house but I want everything to have a place! It just feels like a mammoth task.

I used to hoard more though. I found it very difficult to get rid of stuff - not very sentimental but it was more about an item’s potential, especially around family time/home education stuff. Have to say Marie Kondo’s book did really help, I’ve never had the energy or time (chronic illness is a thing) to gather everything together at once apart from books and clothes occasionally, but it really did make it easier to let go of something and think differently about its purpose etc.

I am desperate to have more of a declutter but due to aforementioned illness it feels impossible - even if I had time off work I’d only be able to physically manage a day of intense sorting before burning out.

FlyLady’s idea of 15 minutes a day is sound, as chipping away at it does help, but I don’t think it really allows for the fact that if you are a house of people who really aren’t wired to stay tidy, that 15 minutes is undone really quickly. It feels like one step forward and one back, constantly.

I’ve been thinking a lot about work life balance lately, as I seem to have a reputation in various circles as this amazing mum who works and studies and home educates and and and… but nobody believes me when I say I’m not doing a good job at any of those things! Not as good as I want anyway. I mentioned to a colleague (also has ADHD) the other day that I feel like if I focus on one aspect of life to improve it (eg eating healthier or decluttering) everything else goes to shit pretty quickly. She said (in a nice way) that it’s normal as nobody can have it all, and I do agree, but it feels like at the moment I can’t have anything! <has toddler style tantrum>

I know improving the home and organisation etc would have a huge impact on everything else but finding the time and energy to do that seems impossible and it would mean everything else fell apart even more than it already is. I’m not even anticipating much of a break at half term - DD1 has mocks again after (has LDs so needs a lot of support with revision), I have at least one day of overtime too. I will definitely do some batch cooking though as in the six weeks between half term and Easter holidays, DH has a hospital course two days a week, so I want to make dinner as easy as possible because he will be exhausted.

Right, should really stop ranting (and those who’ve been around a while will know I have the same rant every month or two 🤣)

Sorry to hear things are a bit much at the moment @CurseYouPerryThePlatypus . I had a similar spell about 7 years ago, I was going through the EHCP process and secondary school transfer with DS, part-time work, started a 2nd part time job, on a couple of committees, and trying to do an OU degree. I was in danger of burning out. Something had to give, in my case it was the OU course, but yours is much more important to you than mine was. All I can suggest is saying no (Kondo style) to anything else that does not bring you joy. Coffee with a friend - yes. Any other volunteering or extra work stuff - no.

Hello, been lurking abit last month . Stocked up on cleaning supplies today and am now making a roast for lunch .
For those interested in nutrition the open uni do free short courses and I plan on starting some nutrition ones soon ,as it is something that I am interested in. I also have the grain brain to read

Ditzy I've always felt like my home is "normal" but honestly, I know that just doesn't exist! We have paperwork that just gathers in hotspots, things don't get put away right away once done being used. We do have clear spaces, but then other areas of the house seem more cluttered.
The clutter and hotspots drive me insane! I like everything put away, DH & DS need it visible or they "can't find it" or "didn't know we had it" 🤦‍♀️

Perry the work/ life balance really is a struggle, routines really do work though. Everybody having jobs/ chores to do help too. Do you still have your chore chart? Old routines may not work because life has changed, but new ones can work 😇

pompoms I used to be on that decluttering thread as well. Just rejoined again this month, but the thread is different now and it seems a lot are counting their outs, which just doesn't work for me! I do have a box I need to take to the charity shop this week, I just have to get it into the Jeep! I also had SIL take 3 tops last night as I had her take a look before I donate.

YesTaDas:
💜 helped DH and DS lay vinyl flooring down in ILs office (took most of the day, but got it all done!)
💜 stopped at the grocery store on the way home to pick up food for dinner
💜 ILs & SIL came over for dinner (jacket potatoes with broccoli & cheddar soup) I just had the soup 😇
💜 played Skip-Bo, drinking wine
💜 rotated DW after they left
💜 fell into bed 😴 just after 11:30pm

No ta das yet today, but I do need to get LOLs done, meal planning and grocery pickup, with lots of relaxing in between.
Hopefully be back later with some ta das. 🍒👋 to everyone

✅ made a chick and spinach pie early on
✅ made jam tarts with leer over pastry
✅ cooked everyone a fry up
✅ cleaned bathroom
✅ wiped down kitchen cupboard fronts
✅ wiped down kitchen table and chairs
✅ little bit of gardening
✅ renewed spirit by sitting in sun with a book and coffee alongside H
✅ lol

@HungryHazelEyes what was the thread like before? I was on it in 2020 and I was heavily pregnant then in 2021 I decluttered the baby and once baby poms was here the decluttering stopped.

Good list @freezingpompoms

We've barely been in the house this weekend. We were out the door yesterday morning at 8.30 and got home gone 10 in the evening. We were out the door this morning at 8.30 again this morning and got back at 5 - Yet the house is a total tip! Teas been gobbled up so gonna try and get a bit of housework done this evening and try and get the house at least looking on par ready for the new week....

MONDAY: kitchen all week

✅Home bleurgh tomorrow. Basically you run round like a mad thing for 1 hour. I've never done it in an hour but do let us know your Personal Best times 😂 . Link about this here:
www.flylady.net/d/daily-focus/daily-focus-monday/

✅Clean your job and wash the knobs for 15 mins max.
✅Declutter for 15 mins
✅Shine your sink

Sneak a peak of the week ahead here:

www.flylady.net/c/sp.php

If I'm missing bits please do let me know as I want to learn more myself

pompoms I think it was more focused on getting rid of just one thing a day. Just a couple of people were trying to get rid of the number of things totaling the year (so 2020 items in 2020 for example). It seems like a little less of the chitchat too, but that might just be me comparing it to our flylady thread!
Well done on enjoying the sunshine today. We got more snow and there is no sunshine (and far too cold to be outside!)

Ta Das, so far (almost noon):
❄️ put clean LOLs away
❄️ meal planned for the week
❄️ grocery pickup order placed
❄️ 2nd LOL in washer (1st in dryer) although they are both done and I should move them along!

I should be linking two days ahead for you with the time difference!

No, I'm actually 7 hours behind! It's still Sunday here, midday 😁

Thanks hazel and ED

I really do need to adjust my expectations of myself. I hate living in chaos though!

All routine is pretty much out the window TBH, I’m considering copying a colleague and asking for (mostly) set working hours, but with the current main project I’m really not sure how feasible that is. That plus DD1’s GCSEs mean that we are very much going to be “getting by” until the end of June, I think.

Definitely need to get the Caglets helping more again, it’s felt like more effort than it’s worth to enforce anything which I know is silly, and they do stuff when I ask (I just don’t ask regularly enough IYSWIM).

Anyway, onwards and upwards, hopefully… even if the climb feels like it’s through treacle!

po3.2
❗️Hang up wet laundry
❗️Towel LOL
❗️Check work calendar and update diary with DH

Ta Das:
🐧 4th LOL in dryer, the rest are folded/ put away
🐧 video chat with Mum
🐧 groceries picked up & put away

I've spent a lot of time relaxing on the couch, catching up with MN and Pinterest. I really should do some organising and decluttering but I'm just not wanting to!