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Housekeeping

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This New Year, The Fledglings are Flying a new approach

824 replies

HillsBesideTheSea · 31/12/2021 16:54

Hello and welcome to new and old.

If you are new around here. Hi, introduce yourself around the fire pit in the naughty corner where we are all sitting comfortably. The naughty corner is decked out with comfy, and snacks, and a place just to have a chat when things haven't gone to plan. We are a very long running thread but do love new blood stopping by to join us.

Welcome to those who are returning.

We had a chat on the previous thread about possibly trying a new twist on the fly lady system. We all know that the fly lady system is good for establishing routines when we follow it. But we also know that sometimes we need a quick hit of a big declutter. And that life has a habit of throwing curve balls making it very difficult to stay on track.

So this is the plan. Each evening I will post the babystep, a thought point and the flylady daily focuses. We are not giving up on the fly lady system but just bringing it into line with the individuality of our lives, and trying to resolve some of the issues that comes from being the family brain, trying to do all the things and generally having modern busy lives. The thought point is to try to get you to think differently. And may require a click on a link (video), a discussion on the thread, or just you considering things. I do not promise it will make you feel better, or magically change your house straight away. But hopefully it will help with the overall flow and approach. And may just tweak the twee out of the fly lady system to the point where it is now your system.

But before you entirely regret your choices in letting my try this craziness we are going to start with some key basics that I really do think has been incorporated well into the Flylady system.

  1. the mess, disorder and chaos did not happen over night. Give yourself the grace and time to fix it. (also known as roman weren't built in a day so don't kill yourself trying to get your house immaculate in a day)
  1. Goals vs system.
We will go into this a little more shortly but to start, the fly lady system has an end goal - a house which is tidy and clean that comes second nature. It achieves it by building habits and routines that make the steps needed to achieve that goal second nature. There is a lot of research that says goals don't work, systems do. And systems are built on the formation of habits.
  1. You are never behind.
You might not be making the progress you would like, you may have taken a break. But you are not behind. So again, give yourself a break and drop the guilt. There is probably a reason why you have taken a break - illness, other demands on time, mental health etc etc. And yes some days it is an effort to make sure that everyone is fed and ok. But that is ok, so give yourself grace that on that day that was exactly what was needed and thus you succeeded in the essential goal of the day. guilt is just going to make things harder than it needs to be. It is ok not to feel guilty if you did not do all the things.

I will be back later with links for tomo. I am posting them in the evening the night before because some of us are morning people, and some of us are night people. And this way everyone will be able to see prior to when they need to consider it.

Come park your broom in the new thread for a little while and have a natter whilst we wait to bring in the New year.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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HillsBesideTheSea · 24/01/2022 12:35

There is something deeply satisfying about steam cleaning a mattress Blush

OP posts:
Redsquirrel5 · 24/01/2022 17:01

Ooh is there Hills? Might have to get mine out of shed in the coming months.

Well I haven’t done a lot.
Tidied pile in sitting room
Made porridge.
Washed up.

Sorted washing basket into putting away in drawers and what needs ironing.
Orted a BRC and it now has fleece sweatshirts and jackets. I would like to put these away somewhere but where as they take up room? I did take off bits of what looks like paint on two jackets. That took a good half hour but they are more wearable now as I picked and resorted to snip a little to make them presentable. They are really thick, warm fleeces so good for up here.
Also checked a basket out and it now holds small handbags, fabric type.
So more floor showing now.
LoL one done, one to go in.
I went under the quilted cover at 2:30pm as I felt so awful. Have had stomach ache since I work up. Had just dozed off when DH came up with a mug of tea which was lovely but I couldn’t get back to sleep. I went into tidy bedside drawer and found co codamol. I was looking for paracetamol but went for that.
Going out to see to hens.
Going to ring surgery. Surely test results will be in by now. Going to leave message for GP too.

Ignored most of home bleugh. I will do a bit each day this week.

HillsBesideTheSea · 24/01/2022 17:11

ta da
make deep conditioner for hair
deal with the clean up of that process
deal with twat builders Angry
stress levels got stupid high again after the builder interaction
cast on a new pair of socks and get one cuff done, and the other started
light treat house plants

stress really kills my get up and go. So now that the mattress has dried out (got a bit carried away with the steam clean Blush ) i actually need to deal with the bedding and figure out wtf to give the people for tea.

OP posts:
Redsquirrel5 · 24/01/2022 18:35

Something easy and quick I would say Hills or something with little prep and throw in the oven.
We are having new potatoes, med veg tray of courgettes, pepper, onion and mushrooms and breaded chicken breast.

1 Co codamol has taken the edge off the pain but it is still there.
Rang surgery and after 15 minutes of being told how important my call was and awful music I got through to a receptionist. I am not that comfortable with them being able to see / refer to your results. What if it is bad news? Any way apparently they all came back normal which is surprising. I then asked for her to pass on the message( to named GP) that I was still in pain and she actually checked me on it! Saying well it was him that signed them off. So I repeated myself and added that he asked me to let him know. Begrudgingly agreed. Why are they allowed to make these decisions? They do not have medical training unless a nurse has sidestepped over to reception duties. Education receptionists are not allowed to discuss or make decisions on pupils. Pass a message they write it down and leave it with the person or on their desk, pigeon hole. RANT over.

Went to shut hens in and quick skip out. Very chatty at being disturbed.
LOL in and wet put on radiator rails.
Back on my bed for a while. Tea soon.

🍒👋🍒👋🍒👋🍒👋🍒👋🍒👋

SingToTheSky · 24/01/2022 21:17

ta da
📗home ed
📗bit of work
📗put laundry away
📗a little BRC sorting
📗rehomed paints in a drawer
📗reading
📗sorted scout badges
📗cancelled tomorrow’s maths lesson and spent the rest of the day doing fuck all.

IWasWillingToGoWassailing · 24/01/2022 21:28

I'm so sorry you're still in pain, Red. Hope it clears up soon. Sorry the receptionist was so unhelpful.

Hills very sorry builders are being tedious.

Pretty welcome aboard! This is a very friendly little corner of MN. Pull up a pew in the naughty corner and tell us about yourself!

Well, Day 1 of 5 survived! Ta da:
❤️ Morning routine
🧡 Stood on scales. Wished I hadn't. Have breached another stone barrier upwards. Sad and discouraged so had a yoghurt and three chocolate hobnobs for breakfast which will not be helping.
💛 Three hours' actual work
💚 Spoke to prescribing nurse - am to have more steroids. Am going to be manic!
💙 DS2 turned up to cook so chatted to him over lunch
💜 LOL put onto dry. 2nd LOL on
❤️ Healthful walk
🧡 Went to collect DD, made phone call I'd be putting off, wrote shopping list for today and started Tesco order for next Monday while waiting
❤️ Hung washing
💛 Dyed my hair (damned silver streaks!)
💚 Reheated roast dinner for dinner
💙 Went to Tesco as DH now too tired
💜 Am in bed.

Absolutely bloody fuming about Mr Johnson and his sodding birthday party.

merryhouse · 24/01/2022 22:03

oh fgs, another one? I have had a hangover all day so haven't heard any news.

Survived exercise class
Managed to get the washing up done (H started it, but I in turn did tonight's because he's out)
Recovered from hangover
PCC meeting over Zoom
Put recycling bin out

Must start doing stuff.

frankiefirstyear · 24/01/2022 22:25

Was it this thread we were talking about heated throws 🤔 anyway, I ordered one from aldi so hope it's as lush as my electric blanket was (minus the uncomfortable wires). So that's one 1AD job sorted and a massive treat for myself!

Got all todays jobs done including batching school lunch box sandwiches- does anyone else do that?! I find it such an efficient idea, much less waste of cooked meat and cheese (sorry new dog) and I use frozen bread so it's easy to butter it, then freeze it straight after making the sandwiches.

Redsquirrel5 · 24/01/2022 22:29

Oh I didn’t know either. He is a bit of a lockdown party animal! Not sure which animal, 🐖🐀🦈 one of these methinks!

Thanks Wassailing I am really fed up with it now. It is nearly a month. Tempted to try starving.
Just vacuumed the stairs before I took it downstairs. Carried on and did sitting room, part of dining room that connects and the kitchen. Will do dining room properly this week. I did it on Saturday.
Forgot to take second wash out and can’t be bothered now I am in bed. It is only three skirts. I went to take them out but too wet so put it back on spin and promptly forgot as tea was ready. Attention span of a gnat.

I am thinking outside the box now. Will ask for chat with pharmacist about meds. I wonder if it is that, although I have had them for pain in the past. Perhaps it is causing it this time. Will ferret out the paperwork tomorrow.

Sorry about stone up. Have same problem although heading right direction now but not by much. Biscuits and cake don’t help.

Hills hope the builders are better tomorrow. They have to remember that you are paying them.

Sing every bit helps. It is more sorted than yesterday I say that is a win.

Wonder where That is? Under a sea of nappies perhaps.

Waves to Dancing and hopes she returns.

ExtremelyDetermined · 24/01/2022 22:31

It may well have been Frankie - I am sitting under a heated throw right now, it is heavenly.

Sorry to have not been posting much this last week, I have been up to my eyes sorting 18 years worth of photos on the computer to make a phtotobook for DS's 18th which is coming up, it has taken hours and hours and hours. All done now thank goodness.

Redsquirrel5 · 24/01/2022 22:33

🍒👋 Frankie no don’t do sandwiches but I was freezing slices of bread during first lockdown when there was a shortage. We only use four to six slices now. Goodness I can remember getting through two loaves a day when the boys were here.

Took my tablets early so hoping to have a good night and wake up earlier tomorrow.

Redsquirrel5 · 24/01/2022 22:34

Oh my goodness ED that will have taken ages. Great idea though.

frankiefirstyear · 24/01/2022 22:46

🍒👋 to you too red yes we go through half a loaf a day easy! Plus the sandwiches.
I'm lucky enough to get given free bread sometimes, so my freezer usually has some in there.

I sorted through all my DVDs at the weekend, was planning to send them to musicMagpie to make a bit of cash back, but you have to have £5 minimum value, and it was just not happening Shock despite a huge pile, most of them scanned as 'ohh we don't like that title' so back to the drawing board for what to do with them. Likely charity shop if they still take them

Ladyrattles · 25/01/2022 00:09

Welcome Pretty

Ta Da
Cakeshowered, dressed and hair hot brushed.
Cakedid the quick swish wipe down of the en-suite bathroom and made the bed.
Cakeset up an old MacBook with 18yr old for him to plug a music keyboard into. Took hours to configure & download everything.
Cakemoved furniture & vacuumed everywhere downstairs.
Cakechanged my whole desk set-up and moved the monitors. Wiped off the usual building site dust from everything.
Cakecleaned the kitchen bin as someone had spilt something all over it.
Cakespent the evening helping friends online.

Really good day Smile

swallowedAfly · 25/01/2022 05:44

I was on about heated throws. I live under mine at home to save on heating. Ds never gets cold.

Long day yesterday.

Today I have cat groomer coming at 12 so somehow have to go from CHAOS to at least vaguely acceptable this morning 🙈

Inspired by yesterday’s video I have downloaded Habitica and put in today’s to dos and daily chores. Will see if I find it useful.

Woke up stupidly early. Trying to persuade myself to get up now and take out dog and check off a task or two before coming back to bed with coffee.

Well done for all the impressive tadas lists.

Totally agree about medical receptionists. Really hoping gps are made to go back to normal like the rest of us.

swallowedAfly · 25/01/2022 06:36

Tada
💕walked dog
💕cleaned litter tray
💕put out recycling
💕folded clean washing
💕hung out laundry I forgot yesterday
💕sorted next load, in wm ready for when drying space frees up
💕made coffee and refilled water filter and remembered to bring upstairs
💕drank 2 glasses of water

I’m counting drinking water to motivate me to drink more.

Now going to reward myself with chilling with coffee(s) in bed for an hour before starting some marking.

swallowedAfly · 25/01/2022 06:49

Attention deficit plus internet equals ooh my heart rate seems to go up like this regularly, I’m on the progesterone part of my hrt cycle now, check Fitbit app, yes progesterone can be linked, hits google, finds articles, discovers yes that probably is it and women’s resting heart rate cycles even with the natural menstrual cycle, becomes curious about estrogen and the heart and differences between natural menopause and hrt use on heart health…

Remembers yesterday’s video mentioning that with adhd there is no pause between a thought piquing interest and taking action 🙈 So many times on various topics people will say, how do you know all this? My brain is relentlessly curious and research is compulsive and we have so much information at our fingertips.

Meanwhile Rome burns…

IWasWillingToGoWassailing · 25/01/2022 08:27

Day 2 - am NGLMS (sung to the tune of Not Gonna Waste My Shot from Hamilton 😁)

Ta da:
❤️ washed, dressed, hair despaired of (is doing its finest Mrs Thatcher wave at the front), LFT
🧡 Breakfast for DS3 and me
💛 Ever increasing list of meds and peak flow done
💚 Found a message on the landline about DD's prescription, which does not bode well

To do (in the order I've thought of them)
🐧 Empty DW
🐧 Visit hospice
🐧 Get chicken out of freezer for dinner
🐧 Iron troublesome pillow case
🐧 Another LOL, probably before I leave
🐧 Answer client about house history within family history.
🐧Cook for largely ungrateful audience
🐧Post here to prove have not killed anyone.

DH is properly getting on my wick at the moment. I know he has a busy and complex work week and is worried about seeing FIL tomorrow, but that cannot leave absolutely everything else to me. Not now.

ExtremelyDetermined · 25/01/2022 08:42

@swallowedAfly - I'm like that, if I think of something I want to find out I have to do it there and then otherwise it bugs me, and its so easy with modern tech. I often get comments about how do I know so much random crap. I find contrary to popular advice going to sleep with my phone next to me is helpful because if I think of something while going to sleep I can check it there and put it out of my mind, otherwise I would stay awake thinking about it. I don't have ADHD (I have tried various online test things and my score is nowhere near the threshold) but I do seem to have some traits. Pre internet I was addicted to newspapers and magazines, I couldn't be in a room with one without reading it.

SingToTheSky · 25/01/2022 09:15

That’s really interesting as I switch between looking at something immediately and putting it on a rolling to do list on my phone to be looked at “later” (which can mean never). Although diagnosed ADHD in 2019 I think I’ve developed coping mechanisms over the years to try and counter my impulsivity - and that has made me really risk averse and passive. And in some ways I’m actually trying to get some of the impulsivity back now because I think the “later, when the time is right” safety net isn’t always good for me - or the Caglets. For example as a home edder I have missed so many opportunities and wasted so many resources by NOT just being spontaneous - I’ve waited for the perfect time that never comes. I really want to do better with Cagletini especially as she’s so curious. Hence last night when she asked me about something to do with lizards (I have a cuddly iguana :o) I actually looked it up and showed her a video straight away rather than writing it down.

In a way it all ties in with my aim to have more fun this year too. Which I’m not doing well at so far - the one thing I really wanted to do (see an exhibition with dad and possibly take the others too for the rest of the museum) isn’t going to happen. I can forgive myself - STILL not right after my booster on January 3rd, to the extent that despite being very pro vaccines I’m considering not getting boosters in future :( - but it’s frustrating as it feels like we’ve had yet another month of nothing.

I know that’s not fully true and work has been amazing, I’ve managed more little activities at home with Cagletini etc. But I’ve left the house like five times this year. The thought of going anywhere just makes me feel so tired (the weather obviously doesn’t help either).

Gah. Must stop venting and get on with the day - need to get dressed and make myself vaguely presentable, staff meeting in 15 minutes and I’m chairing today. I went to bed before 10 last night but had lots of bad dreams and don’t feel remotely refreshed. Hmm

Hope everyone has a good day!

SingToTheSky · 25/01/2022 09:19

ED I often grab my phone and add a note to it if I think of something before I doze off!

I definitely sleep better without my phone too near though 😣😥 I’ve been looking at some coloured whiteboard circles that stick to the wall - would put one by my desk, one in the medicine cupboard, probably one for DD1 and DS for writing what they need to do each day. Not much to look at but in rooms we haven’t decorated I’m really not fussed so might be a good solution for now. Anyway I was planning to put one by my bed too, as then I can write on that if I have a sudden idea or thought, without risking getting distracted by my phone.

Ok seriously need to move now!

prettygirlincrimsonrose · 25/01/2022 09:19

Well that was a bit rubbish.

  • Drove to supermarket but donation bins were shut
  • Got one lot of washing done and in the dryer, but left another load in the machine overnight so had to rewash this morning
  • Couldn't face fridge

Felt really down and tired in the evening and went to bed early without doing things, although at least DH did some of it. Lots of rubbish nights recently which doesn't help - hopefully can nap when DD naps today.

Ladyrattles glad you had a good day

swallowedAfly sounds good, hope you enjoyed your very well deserved coffee

ExtremelyDetermined 18th photo book hopefully a bit of a nice chance to look back. Can't quite imagine getting to that stage but I do sometimes take photos of DS and DD with an eye to something like that (e.g. naked 3 year old climbing a slide)

ExtremelyDetermined · 25/01/2022 09:30

Thanks Pretty. My advice to anyone taking photos for possible future photobooks would be to delete any crap ones fairly quickly and don't just let them accumulate. Also periodically delete all the screenshots/photos of things in shops etc that you only needed very short term. Also sort them into some sort of folders/albums as you go along and don't leave that for years at a time either. Most important - secure storage (cloud or backed up hard drive). I have failed on all these points at times and created a lot of extra work for myself.

swallowedAfly · 25/01/2022 10:31

Sing - I can really empathise. The vaccines and booster have been awful for me and worse each time itms - as in longer and longer to really recover. Unless needed for travel I'm very tempted to not have future boosters because I'm coming to think that covid might make me less ill than the boosters but it's a gamble and I'm undecided. No idea why I react so badly.

More tadas
-soaked and cleaned sink in kitchen
-cleared and cleaned surfaces and the hob
-wiped down cupboard fronts (just spot cleaning really not proper job)
-Cleared and cleaned window sills in kitchen (cat's dining room) and living room (cats hang out and occasionally leave a furball room)
-s&s in bathroom and proper clean of toilet
-brought up random items like shampoo, deodorant etc that comes with grocery delivery but never makes it upstairs

I only have an hour or so left and I'm sweaty and knackered.

Left to do at minimum:

-hoover rug and visible areas in living room
-tidy clutter and mess in living room into semi acceptable state
-put furniture back where it should be
-tidy sofa and chairs (bags of marking, blankets, cushions)
-find a way to disguise my greasy hair and mankiness (not going to have time to shower)

swallowedAfly · 25/01/2022 10:32

Oh and most importantly sweep, vacuum and mop kitchen floor - though it might just have to be a spot mop/wipe of floor at this rate.

Trying not to feel self disgust/despair/overwhelm and fall into pit of my life is such a disaster overreaction to having to let people in house.